Ace of Spades HQ

July 28, 2005

Terrorism/Racial Profiling Quiz
— Ace

I got most of them right, although I did have a brainfart when I answered that Leon Klinghoffer had been murdered not by "male Muslim extremists between the ages of 17 and 40," but by Dr. Charles Drew, who first separated plasma from whole blood.

Not sure how I blew that one. I guess I just never trusted the guy. I remember one time in third grade when I was asked who he was and I said "Dr. Charles Drew is a cryptofascist subversive and sexual deviant who'll be the first one with his back against the wall when Jim Morrison rises from the dead to lead the New Revolution."*

I ended up in Special Ed for three weeks making construction-paper puppets of Cookie Monster. Best three weeks of my whole life.

* Joke lifted from an old friend, but he probably stole it himself, so the hell with him.

More Seriously: Paul Sperry points out the bleedin' obvious in a NYT editorial.

Posted by: Ace at 10:47 AM | Comments (18)
Post contains 169 words, total size 1 kb.

1 Obviously making the non-PC "cookie monster" puppets during those tender years warped you into the sad little righty Nazi that you are today.

It is not your fault of course, but rather Reagan's for not caring enough for our children to stop the Real Corporate food monsters from perverting your natural tastes for veggie burgers into something evil!

Lucky for the Children of Today that the brave PBS workers are struggling to prevent more little children being lost to the Facists....(or is the Fatists?)

XLefty

Posted by: XLefty at July 28, 2005 11:10 AM (MSMPS)

2 Via Drudge:
Veteran wire reporter Helen Thomas is vowing to 'kill herself' if Dick Cheney announces he is running for president.

C'mon Dick, take one for the team, eh?

Posted by: Dave@ at July 28, 2005 11:20 AM (0BAqm)

3 I have to take issue with one of Sperry's points:

Once an Islamist suicide bomber is sitting next to you on the train, your chances of escape are slim. The only solution is for the police to stop him well before he boards your car.

I disagree. One possible "solution" involves shoving a sharp implement in said bomber's eye, and keep shoving until he stops twitching.

There may be others.

Posted by: Phinn at July 28, 2005 11:22 AM (DiZv6)

4 1. In 1968 Bobby Kennedy was shot and killed by:
a. Superman
b. Jay Lenno
c. Harry Potter
d. Muslim male extremist between the ages of 17 and 40

The answer is neither. Sirhan Sirhan was a Christian "Palestinian". He wasn't interested in Islamism (although he was exposed to a lot of it in school), he was more into pan-Arabism. Nasser was his hero.

Posted by: igor at July 28, 2005 11:31 AM (uiuEd)

5 just the threat of cheney running for president? damn, i thought it required silver bullets or some shit like that to get rid of her.
i don't know though, this reminds me of 2000, before i knew anything about politics, and partly just voted for bush to get rid of alec baldwin. obviously that worked out for the best, but i still feel a little ripped off

Posted by: ramms at July 28, 2005 11:32 AM (zj6xd)

6 but of course, the election is still a few years away. long enough for the media to forget anything they're saying now

Posted by: ramms at July 28, 2005 11:36 AM (zj6xd)

7 Wait till something happens and someone sues because they didn't profile, they did search the 80 year old blue hair, but not the 23 year old Hamas dressed muslim. He got a pass.
Take out the ACLU for proecting them in the first place, go for the deep pockets.

Posted by: GregS at July 28, 2005 12:16 PM (FVNT+)

8 * Joke lifted from an old friend, but he probably stole it himself, so the hell with him.

Um YEAH. He stole it from Douglas Adams.

Posted by: kbiel at July 28, 2005 12:23 PM (KSCkS)

9 Yes, but not the part about Jim Morrison rising from the dead. That was pure Diamond Will.

Posted by: ace at July 28, 2005 12:38 PM (sYxc4)

10 Yes, but not the part about Jim Morrison rising from the dead. That was pure Diamond Will.

Now that's just plain silly. Everyone knows that Jim Morrison is hanging out with Elvis and some nearly naked Indian...er...Native American guy on Mars. We'ld have more sightings of him, but he just doesn't like to wait in line at the Burger King in Bucksnort, TN. That, and everyone thinks he looks a lot look Val Kilmer for some reason.

Posted by: kbiel at July 28, 2005 12:50 PM (KSCkS)

11 *Your joke lifted from an old friend is the funniest thing I've here in ages. You should check out IOWAHAWK today. ACE brings the funny of six mortal bloggers!

Posted by: 72 pooters at July 28, 2005 12:52 PM (dhRpo)

12 I don't think Douglas Adams had a patent on the phrase "first against the wall when The Revolution comes," mostly because militant leftists really did threaten people like that back in The Day (see P.J. O'Rourke's work, way waaay back when he was still a moonbat, though a funny moonbat, for examples).

It was the Syrius Cybernetics Corp. in the book, right?

Posted by: Knemon at July 28, 2005 01:41 PM (QaHR7)

13 It was the Syrius Cybernetics Corp. in the book, right?

More specifically, it was the marketing execs of the Sirius Cybernetics Corp, I believe.

Posted by: kbiel at July 28, 2005 02:19 PM (KSCkS)

14 Right right right, for coming up with the copy "Your plastic pal who's fun to be with?"

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