Ace of Spades HQ

April 30, 2007

Shock Study: Lesbians Twice As Likely To Be Obese
— Ace

The study is said to be "damning" of Cinemax's entire after-midnight programming schedule.

LESBIANS are twice as likely as heterosexual women to be overweight or obese, which puts them at greater risk for obesity-related health problems and death, US researchers said.
The report, published in the American Journal of Public Health, is one of the first large studies to look at obesity among lesbians.
Ulrike Boehmer of the Boston University School of Public Health and colleagues looked at a 2002 national survey of almost 6000 women, and found that lesbians were 2.69 times more likely to be overweight and 2.47 times more likely to be obese.
Lesbians have more than twice the odds of (being) overweight, the authors wrote....
They reviewed smaller studies that have suggested a higher prevalence of obesity among lesbians and the possible reasons why.

Hmmmm... Possible reasons why? Any obvious ones jumpin' out at you? Like the possibility that it's more common than obesity causes lesbianism than lesbianism causes obesity? Or that women simply tend to let themsevles go when out of the competitive heterosexual mate-market (as often happens after marriage to both sexes)?

Nah. This is science. Which means, now, it's politically correct.

The results of these studies indicate that lesbian women have a better body image than do heterosexual women, they wrote.

Ah. They're empowered enough to have "better body image" despite the fact they're, you know, pretty fat.

"Better body image," perhaps. More accurate? Debatable.

In more positive news, the study found that lesbians are "three to four times more likely" than heterosexual women to be "pretty handy with a lathe."

Posted by: Ace at 10:44 AM | Comments (81)
Post contains 286 words, total size 2 kb.

1 I think it's because they eat out a lot.

Posted by: Goaltender66 at April 30, 2007 10:46 AM (tVWQB)

Lack of impulse control may play a part.

Also, lack of attention from men to begin with.

Posted by: Entropy at April 30, 2007 10:47 AM (m6c4H)

3 Did I miss the part where lesbians have a 40x greater chance at having a fish scented mustache?

Posted by: Robb Allen at April 30, 2007 10:50 AM (eq5YN)

4 There's your Reality-Based Community in a nutshell: if you have a better body image, it doesn't matter that you have a worse body.

Posted by: Paul Zrimsek at April 30, 2007 10:51 AM (0sVlQ)

5 Living in the San Francisco bay area, I can tell you without reservation the lesbian porn fantasy thing is a lot more appealing than lesbians are in reality. In real life they're shrill and very, very large.

Posted by: Eric at April 30, 2007 10:53 AM (eSqCK)

6 "better body image" = laughably PC spin

if you're fat/obese, thats not good, i dont care how positive your "image" is

Posted by: corn at April 30, 2007 10:55 AM (yHvEo)

Tell me about it.

Posted by: rosie o'donnell at April 30, 2007 10:57 AM (jKVMN)

8 Rosie O'Donnell could not be reached for comment.

Posted by: KelliD at April 30, 2007 10:57 AM (JMwaV)

9 Ace - punch lines needs work. In place of "lathe," try "orbital sander."

Posted by: Reb'm Al at April 30, 2007 10:57 AM (0yvo2)

10 damn you, Rosie!

Posted by: KelliD at April 30, 2007 10:57 AM (JMwaV)

And if you're turned off by the thought of two naked fat chicks rolling around in bed, you're obviously a homophobe.

Posted by: rosie o'donnell at April 30, 2007 10:59 AM (jKVMN)

12 Science says that fire can't melt steel. Yet you deny scinece here and in the Vice President Gore posts. You biblethupers are real idios and bad spelllers too!!

Posted by: Progressive & Proud at April 30, 2007 10:59 AM (AQj/2)

13 You're pwned, KelliD. Now come here and meet my lttle girl. Her name is "Muffy."

Posted by: rosie o'donnell at April 30, 2007 11:00 AM (jKVMN)

14 Wow. I'm really empowered.

Trust me, you guys don't want to know how good a body image I have. Here I thought I was just fat... nope, mentally superior to you attractive pleebs with your poor body image. You easily swayed "healthy" masses.

Promoting "health" and the concept of a "healthy weight". Just another way the man is keeping you down... but why does the man want you to live longer? Seems out of character.

Posted by: Gekkobear at April 30, 2007 11:01 AM (X0NX1)

I think it's because they eat out a lot.

Posted by: Goaltender66 at April 30, 2007 03:46 PM (tVWQB)

I was going to comment, but I can't possibly beat that one.

Posted by: adolfo_velasquez at April 30, 2007 11:04 AM (a5QBa)

Its probably considered more butch to have a pot belly. I think it's also so they can find one another. Kind of like a code; high and tight hair, running shoes, polo shirts, and square-assed jeans. If nerdy straight girls dress this way, they get hit on by dykes...ALOT!

..cowering in a corner figuring a way to put more lace into my wardrobe.

Posted by: Monica at April 30, 2007 11:06 AM (rFLG5)

17 I think they may have meant "batter body image."

Posted by: wiserbud at April 30, 2007 11:07 AM (cEYYd)

18 Well, aren't clams considered high-calorie? Especially the bearded variety?

Posted by: IllTemperedCur at April 30, 2007 11:07 AM (tVbxd)

19 or possibly butter body image.

Posted by: wiserbud at April 30, 2007 11:08 AM (cEYYd)

Thanks but no thanks, Rosie. I'd rather eat in with my husband, Richard.

Posted by: KelliD at April 30, 2007 11:09 AM (JMwaV)

21 any chance they meant bitter body image?

Posted by: wiserbud at April 30, 2007 11:09 AM (cEYYd)

Is it possible that lesbians are very unhappy people? I'd bet they have higher rates of alcoholism/drug abuse/suicide too.

Posted by: adolfo_velasquez at April 30, 2007 11:09 AM (a5QBa)

Somebody told me once that gays don't believe in the...get this...gender binary. WTF? I guess it would explain why anyone would be find Rosie O. to be sexually attractive. She is nowhere on any gender binary.

Posted by: Monica at April 30, 2007 11:12 AM (rFLG5)

24 Well, at least those obesity genes will be working their way out of the genepool.

Posted by: JohnW at April 30, 2007 11:12 AM (wg4FW)

25 ya know, when I first read the headline, I thought it said that lesbians were more likely to be obtuse. Of course, when you consider Rosie, that would have worked also.

Posted by: wiserbud at April 30, 2007 11:12 AM (cEYYd)

26 I know that anecdotal does not add up to factual, but....

Every lesbian that I've known was a lesbian was obese. The "better body image" didn't hold true for any of them. They were just as whiney and annoying about it as any other girl I know.

They also tended to have a lot more mental issues in my experience, with persecution complex being to the level of nearly insane. Like one girl at the Pizza Hut where I managed. She decided to out herself to me, like I was supposed to praise her or something. I didn't care, which then equaled active opression. Ditto several girls in high school I knew through the extended social network.

Posted by: Ranba Ral at April 30, 2007 11:14 AM (VvXII)

27 And in related news...

Posted by: IllTemperedCur at April 30, 2007 11:15 AM (tVbxd)

28 If the Subaru's a-rockin'...

Posted by: David Ross at April 30, 2007 11:16 AM (Mi7Wp)

29 I have a lesbian friend who used to take me out with her occasionally to her bars and her “sisters” hit me on all the time. They may be more accepting of a larger woman but they still hit on the slender girls just like guys. Many of the lesbians like the real girly type so I have stopped going because lesbians can be a bit raunchy when they find out you are not interested.

Posted by: Amaryllis at April 30, 2007 11:26 AM (JhlFi)

30 I don't know wtf they're talking about. My scientific sampling of pr0n finds lesbians are much more attractive than most women.

Posted by: TallDave at April 30, 2007 11:30 AM (odS+4)

I don't know wtf they're talking about. My scientific sampling of pr0n finds lesbians are much more attractive than most women.

OMG pr0n!?1

Posted by: Kensington at April 30, 2007 11:35 AM (kFwRi)

32 Seems illogical considering those stylish and snug Pendletons they wear. That and the lumberjack boots. I'm just a bit skeptical of this study, that's all.

Posted by: pistolero at April 30, 2007 11:36 AM (DIsMj)

33 That's not true of Lesbians in movies that I've watched--and I've watched alot of them.

Posted by: Kasper Hauser at April 30, 2007 11:39 AM (KeOQp)

34 I knew a girl in the Navy who was rather obese. Mentioning her in a thong would cause all of the guys in the room to curl in a fetal position and dry heave, that's how bad she was. She was nasty in other ways as well. One day she tells us girls she's considering becoming a lesbian because "They don't care about the outside, they care about the inside." After she left we found everybody in the room had the same idea: "Why would she think they'd want to be stuck with her?"

Posted by: nnptcgrad at April 30, 2007 11:40 AM (bh0xs)

35 I had a nice comment about "too much eating at the Y" all racked and ready to light off, and goaltender66 beat me by a mile. Rats.

Posted by: Sort-of-Mad Max at April 30, 2007 11:43 AM (WTn2v)

36 Over the last 20 years homosexuality has become a refuge for the socially awkward and painfully shy. In my day boys who weren't good at sports just got good at computers, science, math, or D&D. They were just 'nerds', or 'dorks'. Derisive terms perhaps, but ones that didn't presume anything other than the obvious: socially inept, introverted. Now the kid that gets picked last for teams has the additional burden of being presumed gay.

Posted by: Tomtastic at April 30, 2007 11:46 AM (43ahd)

37 In all fairness, some percentage of women become lesbians because they were seriously abused by men. And those women tend to subconciously make themselves unattractive to men - such as by overeating. Try to only make fun only of people who deserve it.

Posted by: dustydog at May 01, 2007 03:21 AM (MDkjt)

DustyDog - We are making fun of people who deserve it. Apparently you didn't get the memo that states "If thou dost not drop thy fork, then thine ass shall be wide and your gluttony shall be ridiculed by the beautiful."

I find the PC spin on this hilarious as well. Not just the obvious "Im fat I love myself, and the 300,000 cholesteral, cankles, and ominous heart disease hanging over my head doesn't depress me at all." but the fact that they are now claiming that fat is beautiful.

Next they're going to tell me cottage cheese isn't curdled milk.

I, however, will just throw this up on the shelf with all of the other health problems that people with alternative lifestyles carry as well. Lesbians are fat, dyke-ish, and (on most occasions) hairy and unhealthy. While Homosexual men are sickly, probably suffer from way to many events of rectal trauma, and have been proven to "throw like girls", Oh and that whole "homosexual men suffer from more STD's than any other demographic" thing that no one likes to talk about.

Oh well.

Posted by: Nth at May 01, 2007 03:48 AM (fdeNn)

39 And in other news, obese women twice as likely to turn lesbian.

"Sure they still need to get their rocks off" claims lead scientist Dr Jong. "But it seems that there is a shortage of men willing to 'take one for the team'. This means more women are turning to their fellow women for satisfaction."

Carmen Electra could not be reached for comment.

Posted by: CUS at May 01, 2007 04:35 AM (bbXZq)

40 Ya know, I believe I might have a theory regarding this.

Posted by: Taco Belle at May 01, 2007 04:46 AM (8JQvo)

In all fairness, some percentage of women become lesbians because they were seriously abused by men.

I thought they were born that way. After all, that's what we've been told for the last 20 years.

Actually, this brings up an interesting question. If people are born gay and gay people typically don't reproduce (don't make me explain it, morons) then it would seem that natural selection would tend to weed out gay genes. Of course this is assuming gayness is genetic, but hey if we're assuming people are born gay then why not assume it's genetic too.

Posted by: OU_Gryphon at May 01, 2007 04:51 AM (HPU22)

42 Well, at least those obesity genes will be working their way out of the genepool.

no such luck

Posted by: turkey baster at May 01, 2007 04:55 AM (ATbKm)

43 At least that explains Hillary's pantsuits.

Posted by: Bid Swede at May 01, 2007 06:47 AM (xEn0I)

44 It's not that lesbians are overweight, it's just that flannel, blue jeans and Timberlands weigh more than a cropped T, short skirt, and heels. And I'm taking into account the butch haircut offset.

Posted by: Bender Bending Rodriguez at May 01, 2007 08:09 AM (GPTF1)

45 OU, There's some study on "gay genes". There's 2 or 3 that, while not determined to cause gayness, are highly correlated to it.

I feel dirty for even knowing that. Stupid Ethnic Studies PC BS course...

Posted by: Ranba Ral at May 01, 2007 08:58 AM (VvXII)

They reviewed smaller studies that have suggested a higher prevalence of obesity among lesbians and the possible reasons why.

Reason #1: Large amounts of trans-fat in Vagisil

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