Ace of Spades HQ

July 28, 2005

Reviews of "International Male" Fashion Catalogue
— Ace

Funnier than you'd guess. It's fashion advice that speaks to me.

Dr. Thorpe: This guy sweats champagne.
Zack: This is what MTV would look like if Mozart had written a piano concerto about spinnaz.
Dr. Thorpe: I wonder why they chose the photo where he's standing like a bouncer. Terrifying as that coat is, it just doesn't project menance. It's only terrifying because you have to imagine how it smells after a night out: like Brut, scented body oil, hair gel, and testicle.

You can check out the actual International Male catalogue here. It's sort of Vin Diesel in XXX meets an old Scritti Politti video.

Thanks again to

Posted by: Ace at 10:24 AM | Comments (19)
Post contains 122 words, total size 1 kb.

1 Good to see you finally revealed your secret identity.

Posted by: Silk at July 28, 2005 10:31 AM (zoGSl)

2 Condi's black trenchcoat is in that catalog, here

Posted by: Rob@L&R at July 28, 2005 10:38 AM (Yj79M)

3 He looks like he got caught playing dress-up in Liberace's closet.

Posted by: apotheosis at July 28, 2005 10:43 AM (cx2FY)

4 I once got this catalogue in my mailbox. I'm not sure what they were thinking because I am neither gay nor European.

Posted by: Cole from Conservatee at July 28, 2005 10:56 AM (yj4LY)

5 I'm going to have to ask you to remove my picture from your blog immediately!

[Before you homophobes get cranked up, I *had* to wear the coat, its part of the job]

Posted by: BrewFan at July 28, 2005 11:08 AM (Byr3j)

6 ACE, that's way too gay

Posted by: TESH at July 28, 2005 11:18 AM (XfbyH)

7 It would almost be worth ass-raping this guy if you could use the coat to clean your junk up after.

Posted by: spongeworthy at July 28, 2005 11:42 AM (uSomN)

8 Although somethingawful.com is semi-liberal, they are indeed funny when they don't hold back.

Posted by: Greg at July 28, 2005 12:05 PM (YsBhX)

9 That long center-part-combover-to-hide-his-receding-hairline is on its last legs. I've been doing it for years and this guy's receding hairline is a good bit more advanced than mine. Coming up, the Next Stop will be the bald clippers.

Posted by: PLUG UGLY at July 28, 2005 01:08 PM (dhRpo)

10 I'm lookin' and lookin', but I can't find a Batman suit with robin's-egg-blue lace trim.

*Sigh*

Posted by: Michael at July 28, 2005 02:00 PM (pRtzm)

11 this made me laugh til I cried

"Dr. Thorpe: Jesus, the crotch of those pants looks way too complicated. It looks like an H.R. Geiger painting, with all those useless tubes and gears and stuff.

Zack: If you look close enough you can see a dead baby falling out of a giant mechanical ass."

Posted by: Knemon at July 28, 2005 02:07 PM (QaHR7)

12 "Thanks again to posted by Ace" ????

Posted by: max at July 28, 2005 03:45 PM (3Gqm/)

13 Damn that is funny.
I was at work reading that earlier today, i'ts like Mystery Science Theater of Fashion, these guys ripping on those outfits..customers came in the store and I was trying to hide my conniptions. Too much.

Posted by: lauraw at July 28, 2005 06:04 PM (ywZa8)

14 Umm. You know International Male is a gay man's catalog, right?

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