Ace of Spades HQ

August 13, 2008

Police Confirm Cyanide; Also Confirm Dead Man is Canadian
— Ace

A man of the Canadian religion died a few hundred miles from the upcoming Democratic convention due to all that cyanide he had smuggled in.

Police say they do not suspect "foul play." No, really, they said that. Just your everyday, normal Canadian man dying while attempting to build a cyanide gas bomb. Nothing "foul play" about that. It's just some high-spirited college hijinks, like when those CalTech geeks steal a Stanford float and park it on top of a building, and then release a cloud of acidic poison into the air to kill half a stadium.

Don't worry, though. He only had a little cyanide. Not enough to kill half a stadium.

Just a pound or so, "enough to kill hundreds of people."

Police spokesman John White identified the white powder as sodium cyanide, the crystal form of cyanide. Fire officials say they found a bottle containing about a pound of the white powder, or between a pint and a quart by volume. An expert told the Denver Post that the amount of cyanide is enough to kill hundreds of people.
The medical examiners office said it is awaiting test results to determine whether cyanide killed 29-year-old Saleman Abdirahman Dirie, of Ottawa, Canada. His body was found Monday inside Room 408 at The Burnsley Hotel, which is about four blocks from the state Capitol. White said Dirie had been dead for several days. Friends told The Ottawa Sun that he was dead six days before he was discovered.
Foul play is not suspected and his death appears to be an isolated incident, White said. The FBIs Joint Terrorism Task Force is assisting in the investigation but FBI spokeswoman Kathy Wright said the incident has no apparent connection to terrorism.
Alarmingly, however, the man was found amidst paraphenalia indicating he may be a Canadian extremist -- including Bryan Adams concert t-shirts and a copy of the "Canadian extremist training video" Teen Wolf, starring Michael J. "The Engineer" Fox.
A note beside his bed stated "There is no god but Wayne Gretzky and Mark Messier is his wingman."

Nothing to see here folks. Happens every day.

Thanks to Rocket's Brain Trust.

Posted by: Ace at 08:37 PM | Comments (125)
Post contains 378 words, total size 2 kb.

1 What the fuck is wrong with your police that they could say shit like that?

Do you REALLY live in a free country if you're constantly being lied to by your authorities?

There's one Canadian I'm glad died. Score one for the Darwin awards, and for the good guys by default.

Posted by: Christoph at August 13, 2008 08:45 PM (hawOV)

2 Allahu ack-[bacon]-bar!!!!!!!!!!!!

Posted by: Sharkman at August 13, 2008 08:46 PM (UioS4)

3 Maybe he was planning on releasing the bomb in City Park, to clear out all the junkies and homeless people prior to the convention...

Posted by: Alice H at August 13, 2008 08:54 PM (jRtPb)

Thanks for the bullshit troll Christoph

The cops will never admit to the public what is going on, I would not expect them too, just take care of business and let us live our lives

Posted by: bob hussein dole at August 13, 2008 09:18 PM (4GS1g)

5 Fuck you.

Posted by: Christoph at August 13, 2008 09:24 PM (hawOV)

6
>FBI spokeswoman Kathy Wright said the incident has no apparent connection to terrorism

Pound of cyanide in a hotel room held by a Muslim at the site of one of the biggest political rallies on the continent.

Hmmm... Lets see if I can connect the dots.

Gee... nope. Nothing to see here. Just routine shit. Move along citizen.

Posted by: electricferret at August 13, 2008 09:50 PM (kKO7A)

7 We believe it was just some rat poison. Bad infestation apparently.

Really.

Posted by: Chief Clancy Wiggum at August 13, 2008 11:40 PM (YacaW)

8 29 years old? Sounds like an 11th year college student. I bet he was one of those crazy frat guys like Otter or D-Day, always pissing off the Dean and getting in trouble. Totally harmless (and cool!).

Posted by: buzz at August 13, 2008 11:51 PM (Uldz5)

9 p.s. you mean a few hundred yards from the convention, right?

Posted by: buzz at August 13, 2008 11:53 PM (Uldz5)

10 Probably just a highly motivated Hillary superduperdelegate.

Posted by: sulla at August 14, 2008 12:12 AM (tlFbX)

I for one am sick and tired of the "Maple Leaf Menace" to our north. For decades they have been infiltrating us with their "comedians" and "musicians." They have probably infiltrated our schools and our very government.

As a neocon, I think this is the justification we need to perform a pre-emptive strike and effect regime change on this dirty canuck bastards. We should invade thru French Canada as they will put up little to no resistance (unless George St Pierre or Patrick Roy's son is there). We'll be home by spring.

Posted by: PDizzle at August 14, 2008 12:56 AM (btpzp)

12 On second thought, we should just dust off this little gem.

Posted by: PDizzle at August 14, 2008 01:00 AM (btpzp)

13 PDizzle, we've invaded Canada twice. Neither time worked so well. If we want another easy invasion, we should do what we always do, beat up on Mexico...

Posted by: XBradTC at August 14, 2008 01:23 AM (soV1p)

14 A spokeswoman for the FBI isssued the standard terrorism denial.

Posted by: tasteslikechicken at August 14, 2008 01:31 AM (ahg9Y)

15 This post and the comments to this point provide yet more support for Tom "The Bug Man" Delay as no flash in the pan idiot with an attitude- but instead an idiot savant holding a visionary message for the future strategy of the nation's right wing party - with an attitude. They also demonstate why Karl Rove was right to commit so heavily to this element [among Rove's own Seven Pillars: [1] give an American president a domestic policy problem- like a recession or an environmental disaster or a health care crisis or an environmental challenge & you'll end up with a civil servant who is going to have to work his ass off & suck a Congress full of cock to get anything done & he'll still be mocked as a clown & written off as a failure for not putting an end to business cycles & hurricanes & the misery of psoriasis- but give an American president a war & you'll end up with a king who only has to work a 4 day week & takes 20 weeks of paid holidays annually. [2] any half-wit American government CEO can send out his minions to borrow money to help disaster victims- or order the Mint to set the money printing machine on high to get every Colt 45 swilling layabout & every baby machine with an addiction to Jerry Springer the same ability to get the world's best doctor as a millionaire business owner; real genius lies in talking up like that's what you gonna do but outsourcing it so you have someone to blame while providing high return guaranteed dividends to your filthy rich backers & your buddies who will soon join the ranks of those [3] if religion is the opiate of the masses then give out free samples & pretty soon half or more of the country is too stoned to figure out you're actually a pusher [4] every time an unemployed single woman's therapeutic abortion performed in a state run hospital is an opportunity to ask the guy next to you how much he enjoys stepping up to do the right thing by her when he never got any of the fun part [5] Congress might as well declare the last day for Americans to file their tax returns a national holidday- because thats the day every citizen who has to write out a cheque to pay taxes gives into one part of the urge by putting a sadistic curse on Tax & Spend Democrats & to the other by writing a cheque to ones mega-church of choice to praise the god of one's poison for his bounteous blessngs of the Lord includng that Republican presidents would rather have shards of glass forced into their eyeballs than NOT pronounce a tax cut [6] the surest test of manly patriotism is the willingness to kick the living shit out of uppity foreigners trying to steal all our money & so ignorant they can't even talk English like a real person]: that half of all Americans are always going to be more stupid than the other half & will either be so deeply resent being on the neuron challenged side of the bell curve or so stupid they can't even recognize how stupid they really are- otherwise known as "the Base".- - -

Facts: [A] Sodium cyanide is commonly used in the manufacture of PCP. That someone has a name that might suggest an Arab or Turkish or otherwise Middle Eastern background does not necessarily mean that person is a Muslim or a religiously fanatic Salafist [D] or a terrorist. [D] The US or US government backed armed forces have invaded Canada with a view to 'conquering' Canada no less than 3 times since the American Revolution. [E] Canada or Canadian government backed armed forces have have invaded the US exactly not even once. [F] At all times since the build up to the War of 1812- even today- the most senior leadership in the US military has had at least one updated operational plan for attacking & conquering Canada. [G] So far as any one knows - bearing in mind the words of that great philosopher Richard Cheney that "everything gets leaked" - ever since Canada ceased being a colony of England in the middle of the 19th century not only has Canada never once had a plan to attack or invade let alone conquer the US - Canada has never even had a plan to defend itself against an attack by the US or US government backed armed forces. - - -

I am of the opinion that Ace & his Tools are showing the effects of a Pogo-deficient diet.

Posted by: Diderot's dog at August 14, 2008 02:00 AM (otzBo)

16 To paraphrase from your feckless leader McGetoffmylawn: By the way- there was no mention in any of the news reports on this incident of any indication that the deceased was in the throes of or planned on making a bomb- & the word "paraphenalia" is a common police term connoting devices & supplies & recipes for the making of illegal recreational drugs. - - - I see the sure sign that Ace has completely converted to supporting McSeniledementia: an increasing tendency to just make shit up.

Posted by: Diderot's dog at August 14, 2008 02:05 AM (otzBo)

I wouldn't know if I would want him to have made it into the convention center or only as far as the protest cages.

Oh yeah, when you see an endless, solid paragraph of dreck, does antone actually read it?

Posted by: Diderot's dog at August 14, 2008 07:00 AM (otzBo)

Yeah, you.

Posted by: TomJW at August 14, 2008 02:13 AM (xRCpL)

Oh man, you've gone to far this time, on the Caltech thing.

I'll have you know it's the Caltech Beavers. Strike that. Well the Caltech woman's basketball team. Nevermind.

We will get you.

Sincerely,

Nerds with skills.

Posted by: Allen at August 14, 2008 02:16 AM (Zo7G6)

19 Usally, the term "foul play" is taken to mean that the victom was killed by someone else, not that he was up to foul play.

Posted by: Greg at August 14, 2008 02:21 AM (/xAFJ)

20 "A man of the Canadian religion died"

What exactly is the Canadian religion?

Posted by: sdmoderate at August 14, 2008 02:22 AM (mxySm)

I believe Diderot's rant is one of the finest works of pure gibberish that I have ever read.

Dude, ask the doctor to up your meds. It's clear that the current dosage just ain't cuttin' it.

Posted by: John Ryan's Dad at August 14, 2008 02:32 AM (o0YD+)

Funnily enough, when I see an endless column of dreck, I don't read it.

Posted by: Jack at August 14, 2008 02:50 AM (Ss83y)

23 I agree with Christoph on this one.

The police shouldn't conceal information that is so obvious, as in this case. It's appropriate for LEOs to keep certain information to themselves pending a further investigation. And it's important that other jihadis not be put on fucking notice that they're asses are in danger.

But in this case it's just stupid PC crap not to admit the truth. This ass hole intended to be a terrorist. And to admit as much is not to compromise an investigation.

Lying in this case will diminish the public trust of the citizenry toward LEOs. And that is a net negative for us all.

Posted by: Nom de Blog at August 14, 2008 03:03 AM (e321h)

24 Why do they (Canadians) hate us?

Posted by: Che Pizza at August 14, 2008 03:11 AM (RLBRw)

Canadians with more than 15 letters in their name don't watch Hockey Night in Canada. (Don Cherry hates people with that many letters in their name, and isn't afraid to tell them)

Posted by: Greg at August 14, 2008 03:18 AM (RD17r)

26 But.. but... but.. they wouldn't attack us... we're on their side..
- DNC

_{oops, did i just say that aloud}

Posted by: IreneFingIrene at August 14, 2008 03:26 AM (nqlWD)

you all are clueless. canucks spread that cyanide shit over our toast with sprinkles every morning. we start with just a widdle when we're small and build up. there's cyanide and arsenic and lead in and on everything.

i mean look at that diddler's dog posts....lead water bowl with acid rain water in it. give you mental diarrhea every time.

Posted by: dr. akim ullshitbay at August 14, 2008 03:28 AM (x5JYy)

28

Ace's Blog Patrol.. please, please do not delete or alter that rant that of Diderot's dog. It should be saved for future generations.

Posted by: IreneFingIrene at August 14, 2008 03:31 AM (nqlWD)

29 That someone has a name that might suggest an Arab or Turkish or otherwise Middle Eastern background does not necessarily mean that person is a Muslim

"He was not a terrorist," [his sister] said, declining to give her name. "We don't want to hear that word, it hurts us. It is against our religion."

Posted by: IreneFingIrene at August 14, 2008 03:37 AM (nqlWD)

"There is no god but Wayne Gretzky and Mark Messier is his wingman."

Long may McSorely enforce the will of Wayne.

Posted by: Rob B at August 14, 2008 03:51 AM (q32Ly)

31 Except it's likely Mr. Feeling-Blue-that-say is the same guy who professed the "massage" that Christians in Ethiopia, at least, should all be killed for gaining converts by taking advantage of Ethiopian poverty. * Either that, or he read a lot of Bernard Shaw's plays. Which could make anyone bitter. *[On Somlali Christian blog, in reply to post decrying the murder of an Ethiopian Christian who refused to join in quran chanting prompted by a lunar eclipse: lease dont talk shit , that man deserves what happened to him , simply because having the bible in one hand , and a bread in the other hand , is not a correct thing ,! Kill Them , Kill them , Kill them , that is my massage,! Comment by Abdirahman Dirie July 11, 2008 @ 10:33 pm

Posted by: Sarahw at August 14, 2008 03:56 AM (7sl9X)

32 "Mr feeling blue that day", not "Mr feeling blue that say"

Posted by: Sarahw at August 14, 2008 03:57 AM (7sl9X)

33 "A man of the Canadian Religion..." ??? I guess they end all their prayers with "Eh?men"

Posted by: TheSev at August 14, 2008 03:57 AM (bajTN)

34 Kill Them , Kill them , Kill them , that is my massage!

Posted by: Abdul Hajji Clouseau at August 14, 2008 03:59 AM (nqlWD)

35 Sounds like a suicide.

Posted by: grc at August 14, 2008 04:02 AM (h4JIA)

36 A pound of cyanide (sodium or potassium) is more than enough to kill "hundreds" if delivered effectively. You could probably kill well over 1000 with oral doses.

The only place I know of to readily get that much without filling out tons of forms is an electro plating shop. They routinely use it industrially by the 55gal drum in zinc and copper plating operations. The cops need to see if any plating shops were broken into recently.

If the dumbass killed himself with it, he wasn't too savvy about the stuff. I've handled literally tons of the stuff over the years. People who use it industrially know to give it a lot of respect.

Posted by: Purple Avenger at August 14, 2008 04:29 AM (Ub4J5)

Oh yeah, when you see an endless, solid paragraph of dreck, does antone actually read it?

Uaually, the first couple of sentences, if they dont make me LOL, or any sense whats-so-ever I move on.

Posted by: Paladin at August 14, 2008 04:38 AM (H7yeS)

38 when you see an endless, solid paragraph of dreck, does antone actually read it?

Nope. That's the signal for an instant ignore. I see it as a signal of disrespect to the reader from the writer. People wanting to publish screeds need to get their own blog and post links.

Posted by: Purple Avenger at August 14, 2008 04:48 AM (Ub4J5)

39 Canada is a largely autonomous region on the northern US border.

Posted by: Entropy at August 14, 2008 04:58 AM (m6c4H)

when you see an endless, solid paragraph of dreck, does antone actually read it?

idiotrot's a lawyer. he can't help himself.

Posted by: mark c at August 14, 2008 05:02 AM (EVmYn)

1. Somali Muslim enters US from Canada.

2. Somali Muslim has enough cyanide to kills lots of people.

3. Somali Muslim found with cyanide in Denver, 2 weeks before Democratic convention.

4. Nothing to see here. Move along.

Posted by: Scott at August 14, 2008 05:08 AM (W6Sg9)

42 Canada is a largely autonomous region on the northern US border.

Heh.

Posted by: toby hussein 928 at August 14, 2008 05:12 AM (evdj2)

43 He got a Dear Abdul letter.

Posted by: grc at August 14, 2008 05:12 AM (h4JIA)

44

Didgeridoo!

Posted by: Rocks at August 14, 2008 05:13 AM (Q1lie)

It's not that we want them to automatically assume that it is terrorism, we just don't like the automatic rush to assume that it isn't. How about saying that they are investigating all angles, and have not eliminated any motives?

Remember the guy who shot up the El Al counter at LAX - he was a pissed off Egyptian Muslim who wanted to kill some Jews/Israelis, yet somehow it wasn't terrorism because he wasn't carrying a notarized letter from Bin Laden telling him to do it?

Posted by: Holdfast at August 14, 2008 05:21 AM (Gzb30)

46 What exactly is the Canadian religion?

Here it is.

Posted by: mesablue at August 14, 2008 05:33 AM (5yNaE)

PA,

If you work in a university research lab you can get plenty of that salt with only a single box to check on the order form. So, lots of "canadian" activists have access to it.

Posted by: Brad at August 14, 2008 05:35 AM (8nB5X)

48 Dammit! The dog crapped on the carpet again!

Posted by: gebrauchshund at August 14, 2008 05:37 AM (pY77a)

"US has plans to invade Canada" - DDog.

Of course we do. The key word here is "plans" in the sense of "protocols", not "intentions".

The US military is the planning-est operation there is. Let's say Canada (god forbid) was taken over by a foreign power. You think we'd be caught without a plan to go in and clean house? It's only the country on our entire northern border.

I'm sure we have similar "plans" to invade other friendly places, like England, should the need arise. At least, I hope we do.

Bonus Question!: If Canada were invaded by (say) Russia, who do you think would be the first ones on TV complaining that we didn't have longstanding plans to go in and rescue them?

Posted by: Zorachus at August 14, 2008 05:44 AM (yJ5ul)

50 As a chemist who's done plenty of order forms, it's easier to get sodium cyanide than it is to get reagent-grade ethanol.

Posted by: Techie at August 14, 2008 05:48 AM (8xUQV)

51 You'd better not have a plan to invade Canada, your forces would be swallowed up when you tried to take over Toronto.

The libs would get you.

Posted by: Christoph at August 14, 2008 05:50 AM (hawOV)

Posted by: Zorachus at August 14, 2008 10:44 AM (yJ5ul)

Dude, you're arguing with a dog.

Posted by: adolfo_velasquez at August 14, 2008 05:50 AM (FTMl5)

Canadian? That's what Wall St boys call Jooos. I am so confused, was the Somali Muslim really a Joo?

Can't we all just get along? Cocksucker. Move those numbers up, beat DU!

Posted by: Kempermanx at August 14, 2008 05:52 AM (qvT/A)

"Foul play" would mean that someone else killed him. They don't suspect that.

It seems like he was there kind of early to be planning an attack on the DNC. He's been dead six days, and the convention isn't until the 26th. Maybe he was hoping to do something before the convention to disrupt it — make them cancel. Or maybe he just likes to get started early. But it looks like he might not have been the most careful planner.

Posted by: Original Roy at August 14, 2008 05:59 AM (vtR2g)

55 Just for the record, the whole the US has plans thing is a joke.
The military has had may plans, with different scenarios, for invading every country on the planet, including the US. It's called being prepared.
France has a plan for surrendering to every country. You don't hear people complaining about that.

Posted by: Rocks at August 14, 2008 06:00 AM (Q1lie)

56 Canada has had plans in the past to invade the US and I'm sure we do now. It was decided our best chance of defence would be to invade aggressively.

Posted by: Christoph at August 14, 2008 06:06 AM (hawOV)

57 It was a work accident

Posted by: toby hussein 928 at August 14, 2008 06:20 AM (evdj2)

58 France has a plan for surrendering to every country. You don't hear people complaining about that.

ROFLMAO!!

Posted by: BillyBob at August 14, 2008 06:25 AM (6iVlh)

#16 #41 What exactly is the Canadian religion?

It's the same thing as the Islamic race. Duhhhhh.

Posted by: LouisianaLightning at August 14, 2008 06:30 AM (yGmLl)

Invade Canada?

What for?

The outstanding weed?

Canada: America's Attic

Posted by: MrsPaulsFishSticks at August 14, 2008 06:30 AM (iYbLN)

61 Canada protects your northern border against the Russians and don't you ever forget it.

Posted by: Christoph at August 14, 2008 06:36 AM (hawOV)

62 We believe it was just some rat poison. Bad infestation apparently.

Darn tootin'. There's rattus kennedyus, rattus pelosius, rattus goreus . . . .

I see, by the way, that chick Al Queda big shot they caught a little while wanted to kill Jimmy Carter. Don't they know who is on their side?

Posted by: WalrusRex at August 14, 2008 06:40 AM (DVVXZ)

63 Actually, if you skim Diderot's rant, there is a small bit of reasonable information.

From what I've heard (so far) we don't have the explanations for what he was doing, and there are other (often less than legal) uses for cyanide.

If he was making a bomb; then wouldn't he have some method of spreading/releasing/etc the cyanide (i.e. bomb-making stuff)? I mean, if you give me a handful of C4 and tell me to make a bomb, I'm going to need more materials than that; same with a pound of cyanide.

If he was making PCP (which is possible) he's have other chemicals used in the process (at least I'd expect as much). Do we know what else was found? Hell, I'm not going to google "how to make PCP" from work, but are the rest of the ingredient list easier to get?

If he was playing "huff cyanide to try to get high" I'd expect to find a subscription to The New Yorker, and possibly a coloring book if he was really clever. Can we see if the TV was set to MTV? Did he rent "Jackass" the movie?

I'm not saying he wasn't trying to make a bomb, but it seems you'd want a plan where you get all your materials together (or at least get a plan of how to do this) before you get an ingredient that can kill you. Of course he doesn't seem clever enough to act rationally so we may never know for sure.

But lets not rule out complete moron.

Posted by: Gekkobear at August 14, 2008 06:48 AM (X0NX1)

64 Oh yeah; the one reason to suspect this is anything "special" is the DNC Convention.

But Denver is still Denver, and gang/drug activity and stupidity isn't going to go away just for the DNC. It would be a bit of an odd coincidence; but that doesn't rule it out.

Suicide by cyanide is a bit rare, but also possible:
http://www.hawaii.edu/hivandaids/Suicide_by_Cyanide__17_Deaths.pdf

I'll admit the timing/location would make it a bit odd; but circumstance isn't proof. I'm still curious what else was found in the room. If they find a timer, and something to spread a cyanide gas form (like a strong acid to form gas from cyanide) then yes; a bomb is likely.

But if they find a note that simple says "wibble" then he may be crazy/stupid/retarded/suicidal.

Posted by: Gekkobear at August 14, 2008 06:56 AM (X0NX1)

65 I think the time has come to cancel the Democratic Convention and declare Martial Law.

Then, have an episode of survivor with McCain and Obama. I expect McCain to win that handily.

For the second round, the Apprentice. I expect Obama to kiss sufficient butt with a smile on his face to prevail.

Finally, the tie breaker will be similarity to Paris Hilton's superior energy plan.

Posted by: Christoph at August 14, 2008 06:56 AM (hawOV)

66 "Canada protects your northern border against the Russians and don't you ever forget it."

Besides the whole Alaska thing and the proto-Marxist intelligentsia...Yeah, they've certainly pulled their weight against the various Huns.

But regarding a Russian blitzkrieg?
Canada is mostly a highly effective speedbump due to its vastness.

Canada is to the Russians as Russia was to Napoleon and the NAZIs.

Posted by: monkeyfan at August 14, 2008 07:12 AM (cEE8N)

67 Your forgetting, monkeyfan, the Canadian Rangers.

They provide the initial defence of Canadian territory from northern invasion and not only protect you from the Russians now, but also protected the mainland from the Japanese.

Man for man, the Canadian Rangers are the finest winter fighting force in the world.

They have Lee-Enfields and they know how to use them.

Posted by: Christoph at August 14, 2008 07:18 AM (hawOV)

"Canada protects your northern border against the Russians and don't you ever forget it."

...We're FUCKED

Posted by: Lemmiwinks at August 14, 2008 07:19 AM (Nwbo8)

69 Lemmiwinks, you gots to remember that Canada has the best combat soldiers in the world. You train quantity; Canada trains the heck out of each member.

Usually, in the United States soldiers don't even know how to use any weapon other than their rifle and if the machine gunner goes down, they all look around like chickens with their heads cut off not knowing what to do.*

Posted by: Christoph at August 14, 2008 07:21 AM (hawOV)

70 *Yes, I'm kidding. But that's what the average Canadian soldier believed when I was in. It was nonsense then and I didn't win friends by pointing it out.

Truthfully, I'm grateful to your country for providing naval protection and forward deployed forces against the great evil powers of the world. We've helped somewhat, and I'm glad of that.

Posted by: Christoph at August 14, 2008 07:23 AM (hawOV)

71 Haven't the Canadian authorities been generally reluctant to admit there are such things as terrorists? What's that family of al'Qaeda sympathizers, bag-men, and gunners who openly live among the Canucks?

And, Diderot's dog -- thanks for the lesson in making PCP. We'll keep you in mind when it comes time to feed the DEA some tips.

Posted by: Rob Crawford at August 14, 2008 07:24 AM (IuKAf)

Posted by: Gekkobear at August 14, 2008 11:48 AM (X0NX1)

Maybe he was a mule bringing in the cyanide and just opened the container to see if it was full?

Posted by: TomJW at August 14, 2008 07:32 AM (xRCpL)

73 No doubt the quality of the Canadian ops is awesome but in the context of an overland invasion of North America they - in concert with the vast inhospitable terrain - mainly serve to slow advancing enemy formations until they can be fixed and destroyed by superior forces. Mostly with assets from/of the United States.

Yes Canadian soldiers are brave and effective and, American strategists appreciate their contributions, but as I believe Stalin is purported to have once said: "Quantity has a quality all its own."

In aggregate the US of A has long guaranteed Canadian sovereignty...And their spendy welfare statism too.

Posted by: monkeyfan at August 14, 2008 07:42 AM (cEE8N)

74 In reality, monkeyfan, I don't believe the Russians would invade the US from the Arctic.

They may run into a wee bit of supply and transportation difficulties.

Posted by: Christoph at August 14, 2008 07:45 AM (hawOV)

75 I think we should be concerned most about the backlash against Canadists.

Posted by: Loren Heal at August 14, 2008 07:48 AM (s9Ak0)

76 Exactly!

Posted by: monkeyfan at August 14, 2008 07:50 AM (cEE8N)

Canada would be to the USs northern defense, much as Belgium was to the Maginot Line

Posted by: Paladin at August 14, 2008 07:57 AM (bWB5j)

78 Moronic, Paladin.

Posted by: Christoph at August 14, 2008 07:59 AM (hawOV)

79 Maybe he was a mule bringing in the cyanide and just opened the container to see if it was full?--TomJW

Undoubtedly the Somali was a mule, or jackass. It may be that he didn't even know exactly what he had in the container, and opened it to find out, and found out. Loser.

Hotel rooms are not zoned for industrial fabrication of anything. There's no legitimate reason to carry cyanide into a hotel, no matter how crazy you are.

WEIRD bit of twisted luck.

Posted by: maverick muse at August 14, 2008 08:01 AM (F1b/5)

80 Belgium in this context being the North Pacific?

Posted by: monkeyfan at August 14, 2008 08:01 AM (cEE8N)

81 Ugh, what I don't think you realize is the Canadian fficial&client=firefox-a&um=1&sa=N&tab=wi">secret weapon would thwart any attempt at attack!

Posted by: Christoph at August 14, 2008 08:11 AM (hawOV)

Bonus Question!: If Canada were invaded by (say) Russia, who do you think would be the first ones on TV complaining that we didn't have longstanding plans to go in and rescue them?

Universal Bonus Question!: If ____ were ____ by (say) ____, who do you think would be the first ones on TV complaining that we didn't have longstanding plans to _____ and _____ them?

The answer to both is, of course, the same. Hey, this could be a contest!

Posted by: sherlock at August 14, 2008 08:17 AM (ojW85)

83 The US northern approaches are protected by Canada more so than by Canadians, or more correctly Canada's multi-culti bureaucratic culture.

Which I think is kinda the point. In this age of proxy war [terrorism] by small stateless entities and crazy tech-empowered individuals, Canada is a weak entry point of/for the US.

A point of fact that is not aided by the US' own bureaucratic classholes.

Denial of ground truths - PC or otherwise - has never won a war and has yet to inspire a population to resist, much less put down, an insurgency.

Posted by: monkeyfan at August 14, 2008 08:23 AM (cEE8N)

Hotel rooms are not zoned for industrial fabrication of anything. There's no legitimate reason to carry cyanide into a hotel, no matter how crazy you are.

Well what are you supposed to do with it, leave it in the car??

Psssh.

Posted by: Entropy at August 14, 2008 08:30 AM (m6c4H)

85 The cyanide was for purely self defense purposes.

Posted by: Entropy at August 14, 2008 08:31 AM (m6c4H)

86 Dead six days? Nice to know maids at the Burnsley Hotel do pay attention to those "Do Not Disturb" signs.

Posted by: Dusty at August 14, 2008 08:58 AM (8RfU1)

87 Perhaps this was simply a terrorist attack gone bad. Apparently these things are okay if something doesn't go awry causing them to go bad.
Case in point is this shooting of a Chicago policeman. He would have been okay if this robbery had not "gone bad".
http:// http://www.chicagotribune.com/news/local/chi-chicago-cop-dies-webaug15,0,3757715.story

I don't think we can simplistically judge this man because he is a victim of a terrorist act "gone bad". Only if it had "gone good" would we be able to judge him as a terrorist.

Posted by: Kyle at August 14, 2008 09:30 AM (JlSVY)

88 Oops, complete linkcompoopage.

http://www.chicagotribune.com/news/local/chi-chicago-cop-dies-webaug15,0,3757715.story

Its my first time. Please don't make me bite my false tooth.

Posted by: Kyle at August 14, 2008 09:46 AM (JlSVY)

89 Okay, double failure. I simply must die.
Crunch!
Gurgle
Arggh!
thud.

(he wouldn't type "Arggh" would he?
Maybe he was dictating.)

Posted by: Kyle at August 14, 2008 09:52 AM (JlSVY)

90 Her brother, she said, had travelled alone to Colorado for a vacation. "He was just going on a trip."

see its nothing.. according to his sister.....

Posted by: PISSED at August 14, 2008 09:55 AM (STTo4)

91 Dog, go back to licking your balls. No wonder Denis always threw you outside when he had work to do on the Encyclopedia.

As to your "facts":

A) No, but being a Canadian citizen doesn't necessarily mean you're not a terrorist, either (e.g., the Khadr family), which seems to be the main thrust of emphasizing his citizenship. As for whether or not sodium cyanide is used to make PCP, so fucking what? It's also used for gold mining, but most miners don't keep supplies in their fucking hotel room.
B) and C) These come after A) and before D). Might want to keep that in mind.
D) First, what the fuck does this have to do with this guy having a pound of cyanide? And second, not quite. In the War of 1812, we fought in Canada (the territory, not the country, which didn't exist yet) because we were at war with the British Empire- which Canada was a part of, as you may recall. And as for the Fenian raids, we arrested and disarmed them after their first attempt. Some government support.
E) But if we're counting Canada as an independent nation before the fact was so (and that anyone operating with the sufferance of the Canadian government counts as Canadian), and apparently we are, then yes, Canada has invaded the U.S. Some references: Isaac Brock, the Battle of Detroit, the Burning of Washington, U.S.S. Chesapeake, and the St. Alban's raid.
F) At all times? Really? Other than War Plan Red, can you name or point to a link to even one other plan? And incidentally, War Plan Red was a plan to fight the British Empire. Which is why it also had sections on India and Australia, for instance. Canada was just the easiest part to get to... and the easiest part for the British to get to us from. I could also point out that the American general staff system- you know, the people who actually do the contingency planning- came along a lot later than the War of 1812... ah, fuck it. If you can't figure out whether or not the tennis ball has actually been thrown, I doubt you'll see why that's relevant.
G)So far as you know, you mean. Perhaps if you hadn't spent so much time dragging your ass across the carpet, though, you'd know about Colonel James Sutherland Brown and Defence Scheme No. 1. This was a plan to defend Canada by invading the United States. Brown even did a little incognito spying as part of his prep work.

The rest of your (non-bolded) ranting idiocy I'll leave alone, since it's merely opinion. Except for one thing. Yes, half of all Americans are dumber than the other half. This is true of all peoples- it's the nature of a bell curve, fuckwit.

Now, if you'll excuse me, Diderot's hamster and I have plans. We're thinking of spiking your kibble with one of the ingredients of PCP. Care to guess which one?
(Hint: It's pee. The hamster convinced me that letting you live would pay off big entertainment dividends in drooling stupidity, and you know, I think he's right.)

Posted by: Diderot's cat at August 14, 2008 09:58 AM (oDyhF)

92 Diderot's cat is Garfield with roid rage.

Posted by: uniball at August 14, 2008 10:13 AM (27iEn)

93 SOff-Topic: Detroit's mayor is getting out of jail in time to be an Obama Superdelegate at the DNC convention.

Maybe he'll be able to swap jail stories with convicted Alabama Governor Don Siegelman who is apparently going to speak at the convention.

This may be the first national party convention ever covered by "America's Most Wanted."

Posted by: Socky at August 14, 2008 10:34 AM (PLvLS)

17 I believe Diderot's rant is one of the finest works of pure gibberish that I have ever read.

THREAD WINNER

How can Democrats keep their heads in the sand about Islamofascists when they're demonstrably not immune from potential attacks from same?

Posted by: atnorth at August 14, 2008 11:19 AM (VAF/F)

95 DD may have a point. Who knows who'll be needing some PCP to get through the entire DNC...........

Posted by: Techie at August 14, 2008 11:32 AM (sPuBs)

96 Can't a Muslim schizophrenic with an axe to grind < ahref="http://www.canada.com/ottawacitizen/news/city/story.html?id=fe8f1bf4-1f08-4b78-80dc-e99d8a77e9c6&p=3">go on summer vacation and kill himself with a supply of cyanide large enought to kill a hundred or two Bigfeet, without raising all this speculation?

Posted by: SarahW at August 14, 2008 11:41 AM (7sl9X)

97 So a crazy guy dies of a cyanide overdose, and the police don't even want to see if somebody helped him? They must have found a recipe for cyanide and jelly sandwiches written in Canadian next to either the jar of Smucker's Grape Jelly or Kraft Cyanide Enriched Velveeta Cheese Product (poure vende soliel en Quebec). Please allow me to believe that the RCMP or the CIA or the Camp Fire Girls gave this guy a couple of roofies, tucked him into bed and gave him a AlkaSeltzer and Cyanide cocktail, to prevent a hangover, and then mailed a tip to the hotel's manager. Or could they at least re-edit the webpage at www.about.com/howtomake/cyanide_gas_releasing_party_favors ? If he were a white catholic US senator from the GOP, you can bet the police would be investigating very carefully.

Posted by: Potosi Joel at August 14, 2008 11:47 AM (TPRbZ)

98 "He fell down an elevator shaft. Onto some bullets."

Posted by: James at August 14, 2008 11:53 AM (QvU5o)

99 Somalia seems to be one of those countries full of batshit crazy islamists. Just google the news...that guy who won't carry alcohol in his cab - Somali immigrant, etc, etc., honor killings, etc. A lot of our potential terrorist problems would be minimized if we just shut off immigration from a handful of islamotard producing countries like Somalia. After all, I'm pretty sure our quota for unskilled, uneducated islamocrazed goat herders has long since been met.

Posted by: rinseandspit at August 14, 2008 11:54 AM (VFTrh)

100 Gekkobear, the deal is this guy was a paranoid schizophrenic. So he may have had the will and the means but was prone disorganization leading to a fail.

Posted by: SarahW at August 14, 2008 11:55 AM (7sl9X)

101 Sort of the way I fail with links, which I have to put in manually because of my old browser.

Posted by: SarahW at August 14, 2008 11:56 AM (7sl9X)

102 The management of this blog establishment need to fix their comments thingies between the old and new blogs...getting hard to follow the flow and figure out who shot first

Posted by: dave at August 14, 2008 12:00 PM (3J0xV)

103 Yes, please make the comments thingies intertwix better.

Posted by: SarahW at August 14, 2008 12:08 PM (7sl9X)

104 That should read "Canadian". He's about as Canadian as Omar Khadr.

Posted by: Mark at August 14, 2008 12:32 PM (s379Y)

105 #82 by Potosi Joel....I laughed so hard my dog came into the room to see what was happening. hahahahahahaha

Posted by: jmb at August 14, 2008 12:43 PM (sm8NP)

106 I don't think the cops were trying to be PC or dishonest. I think they're just clumsily trying to say they don't know what's going on, and they're wording it very poorly.

Since this guy had schizophrenia, it may be true that this had nothing to do with islamic terrorism. Maybe he was just severely delusional at the time.

And speaking of which, nice rant by Diderot's dog.

Posted by: sandy burger at August 14, 2008 01:47 PM (VC56G)

107 The comment mixing is a bad idea, because it's one-way.

Old site comments end up here on the new site, but our responses to their blather don't go back to the old site. So while we elite new site users have to put up with their spam, they don't even know we exist.

Build the virtual fence!

Posted by: sandy burger at August 14, 2008 01:52 PM (VC56G)

108 We need a 3rd blogsite for that obstinate shit, Christoph

Posted by: Bart: at August 14, 2008 01:56 PM (EGhNS)

109

in the local news, his sister was quoted as saying he was 1) a schizophrenic who was off his meds, and 2) he was in Denver on vacation. And who among us, when packing for a vacation, doesn't include a jar of cyanide?

She also declined to give her name.

I'm sure there's no cause for alarm.

Posted by: Jones at August 14, 2008 06:44 PM (KOkrW)

110 He was just making sure that the ignore this one functioned properly when tested. It's rather irrelevant as news isn't it? Terrorism doesn't fit this one's profile. Move on.

Posted by: Timon of Athens at August 14, 2008 07:43 PM (Kl+UU)

111 You know how it is...you're out looking for kicks, then someone starts passing around the weaponized hallucinogens cyanide...

Posted by: Bruce Wayne at August 14, 2008 08:16 PM (25unC)

112 How the hell does a dead body sit undiscovered in a hotel for six days? That's some quality maid service right there. I'd hate to see the blacklight test on those rooms.

Posted by: Fa Cube Itches at August 14, 2008 08:20 PM (25unC)

113 " it may be true that this had nothing to do with islamic terrorism. Maybe he was just severely delusional at the time." It's a mistake to consider the two mutually exclusive, though, which is what they are doing. I mean, I buy that he probably had no ties to organized Islamic terror groups ( although use of nutjobs to mule or carry out terror plots is not unprecedented), and any plan he formed in reaction to his delusions would be typically disorganized, but the fact that he stirred a heaping teaspoon of cyanide into his own waterglass and drank it down doesn't mean that's all he ever meant to do with the rest of the stuff hidden away in his hotel room. It may only be that the voices in his head told him "go with plan B", and/or that he was so disorganized in his thinking that his plans shifted like sand. I do think that KILL THEM ALL internet post was probably his. Islamic religious animus might well have been a feature of his obsessions and delusions. So if it's a party or religion of crazy thing, that doesn't mean he never meant any harm ever.

Posted by: SarahW at August 14, 2008 08:20 PM (7sl9X)

114 Well that's odd. I had plenty of breaks between lines in the comment box. Something's screwy.

Posted by: SarahW at August 14, 2008 08:21 PM (7sl9X)

115 #13-- Yeah, but now we can go in over the flat bits out west where they ain't no rivers...

Posted by: richard mcenroe at August 14, 2008 09:11 PM (e+exz)

116 Is that some kind of dirty trick, where I see my own post as a Diderot rant? Because that is a good joke.

Posted by: SarahW at August 14, 2008 11:08 PM (7sl9X)

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