1

Well, since Rove has Osama stashed somewhere to win an election when it's necessary, maybe he got his weather machine from al Quaeda too?

Didn't think of that did you?

2 Unless Al Qaeda now has a Weather Machine, it's a lie.

They tried to borrow mine, but I told them to f* off.

3 Stop copying my material, Veeshir; you're now on my list.

4 Joe just can't help himself, doggone it. He is just so doggone cocksucked-ly funny.

5

Ace,

Don't forget his deferments and his "asthma" condition that prevented him from joining the army.   Sounds like our present Vice President.   I thought it was a great contradiction when the Reps played the video of the medal of honor winner who really had asthma as a youth.  He worked to build his lungs in the pool just to join the army and the seals.  Beside this wonderful hero we have Biden.  Who took deferment after deferment than got a "asthma" excuse when the deferments ran out.  Now this chickenhawk wants to send soldiers into Pakistian

 

6 10,500 feet?  Seems kind of high for a helicopter to me.  I may be reading it wrong but can anyone of the other morons on this "smart military blog" check this "fact"?

7
Neil Kinnock sign up with the Army Rangers recently?

8

FDR on the television: Proof here.

What say you now, Rethuglicans?

9

I had a flight grounded by fog once.

Does that mean that I was "forced not up" by Al Qaeda?

10

I'm sorry, but Biden is awesome.  He's absolute comedy gold, can't possibly do anything to help Obama win, and may cost him some votes.  Plus, he clearly just doesn't give a shit.  He'll  be fine win or lose and is just having a good old time spouting off nonsense while in the spotlight.

Giving him the VP nod is like giving a blind, deaf, and dumb Taliban an Uzi.  You  know there's gonna be a hell of a lot of damage, but you have no idea which direction it's gonna be in.

11 just a thought, but do you think maybe the dems are creating a reason to unload biden and add hillary to the ticket? 

12

 

Terrorist snowflakes are very tricky.  That’s why I carry a Beretta.  I showed those puffy white bastards a thing or two when my fighter jet was shot down over Afghanistan.  God bless Obama though, he made reminded me to bring my Beretta.  That’s what he said.

                "Things Biden said" Vol II

13

I always laugh when I hear some fawning talking head talk about Biden's scary big brain on foreign affairs. 

What a maroon.

14 So *that's* what happened to the Weather Doiminator.  Destro said he just wanted to take it for a spin, and doodley-doodley-oop, he and it haven't come back to the office since.

15 Was President Roosevelt on TV in 1929?  I don't think so.

You know, all of this crap coming out of Biden in such short order leads me to believe that the Obama camp is setting the stage for a Biden departure.

Like, he goes crazy or something like that.  I could have sworn I read about that happening once, a long time ago...

16 It's interesting that where Palin and McCain differ... like on ANWAR, they can both co-exist with separate positions.

But when Joe has a position different from The One, Joe's 30 years of "experience" (cough, cough) is expected to give way to Gospel According To Barack.

Joe says the bailout of AIG = Bad... Barack backhands him.
Joe says "no coal"... Barack runs for cover
Joe says "email ad sucked"... Joe handed revised comments

Joe's going to start getting a sore back at his age spending all of his time bent over grabbing his ankles.  Send him some Vasoline b/c if he doesn't need it yet, he will soon.

17 Oh, and COBRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!11!!!!11!!11ELEVENTY11!!11ONE!!

18 Did I mention that I own a Beretta?

And I have grandchildren who weren't aborted. Also, I almost joined the military; I was going to be a jet fighter pilot.

19

Hermit Dave

 

thanks i needed a good laugh today..

20 Ace! That was downright... Beauchampian!

no one gives any credence to anything that fumbles out of this buffoonish dolt's drooling idiotmouth.

Ahh... that brings back thoughtmemories.

21

#11

I heard that that was being discussed, but I mentioned it in another thread (I was worried about a Palin/Hillary debate) and was told it would never happen.  I am hoping it does not.

22

Joe is ight about FDR's TV speech. How do I know he's correct? Because even though I wasn't able to watch it live I watched FDR the next day on TIVO.

So don't give up on Joe. Did we give up when the Germans bombed Pearl Harbor?

23 Natalie,

Stop spreading that smear-link.   FDR read Wikipedia and knew very well that I brought tee-pees, not houses, to the GOP ticket.

24 10,500 feet is awfully high for a helicopter. But that's what the terrain is like over there. One reason the Chinooks are getting such a workout is that they have much better high altitude performance than the Blackhawks. And Apaches struggle with a useful load at that altitude.

25

AndrewsDad:

Published max ceiling limit on a Blackhawk is just over 19K feet.  So 10K is easy.  (Normal is around 11K).

These levels are reduced when forced to carry an enormous load of stupid bullshit, however.

26

Aknot, Palin isn't highlighting her differences from McCain, and that's the difference.  She stays on message.

Cobra.

27 Then I charged into the face of al-qaeda with my two shotguns and beretta blazing fire and hot lead, saving the lives of a six star general and most of the congress.

28 Sounds like our present Vice President.  

Did someone need a barbed cock? I swore I heard someone ask for it, something about needing my fifteen inches of flesh-rope. No takers? Well, back to the bunker then. You know how to find me.

29

Senator Gen. Quart "Fitch" Hosselfitch, Special Envoy, Jupiter Coalition for Deep Space Exploration

Senator Lt. Col. Harry "Rockcrusher" Burtrocker, Agent Code Name "Green Tide", Anti-Terrorism Unit Force Bravo

Senator Adj. Gen. Milton "Milt" Crustknob, AG, Cross-Terminator Squad, Spectrum Divison

Senator Col. Oliver "Thrusher" Flint, Operator Gen., Fith COlumn Division Snake Heel

Senator Butch "Earthquake" Granitechisel, Lead Anti-Infiltration Module Yellow, Tenth Mountain Div., Exelon Company

30 "Stand-up FDR, Give FDR a hand. Stand up!"  oooohh... "Everyone stand for FDR!" 

31

Just one heartbeat away!

32
Like most Libs/DemocRats, Slow Joe Biden wants to take credit for being in danger (or in the military) without actually being in danger (or enlisting).

They're so ashamed that they haven't had the balls to do anything, so they make up lies about it, to make themselves feel better.

33 I got drunk and missed a flight out of Denver a while ago.  Does that mean I was forced to stay because of the fascist vodka?

K

34

And oddly, for all his concern about being a single heartbeat away from the presidency, Andi Sullivan has remained totally silent on this issue.  Are we surprised that he's yet to post a Biden/Eagleton poll as he did for Palin 2 weeks ago?

 

 

35 WTF - all I did was put an "E" at the end of potato and I never heard the end of it. . 

36

"Pathetic. A man of his advanced age still telling absurd hero stories, easily disproven."

Ace, you are correct, it is pathetic.  This does not excuse it, but he truly cannot help it... he's a pathological liar.  Some people are so insecure that they feel the need to embellish (read "lie") their story to make it more believeable.  It, of course, does just the opposite.

The real story here is the poor judgment of Obama, in picking a man known for this proclivity.

Call me a conspiricist, but is it possible that Obama actually picked a dunce for a running mate in order to make himself look smarter?

37 He said he *knows* where bin Laden is. As in knows Osama's whereabouts close enough to capture him.

So if Obama and this turd win the election, is anyone going to hold Biden to his claim that he can capture bin Laden?

38

Then I charged into the face of al-qaeda with my two shotguns and beretta blazing fire and hot lead, saving the lives of a six star general and most of the congress.

Then I carried John Kerry back to the still smoking 'copter to radio for help.  He had taken shrapnel in the ass after a taliban insurgent threw a rock in his general direction.

39

Dick Cheney

 

Just saying for 8 years we have heard about the "chickenhawks" in the Bush admin.  Now we have dems with their own "chickenhawks."  Neither served one day in the armed forces and yet we hear nothing about it in the media.  At least Bush served in the National guard.  Obama and biden did not serve ONE FUCKING DAY in the armed forces and they want to INVADE Pakistian.   Is that not the definition used by the left over the last 8 years of the term "chickenhawk" 

 

 

40 just a thought, but do you think maybe the dems are creating a reason to unload biden and add hillary to the ticket?

With Joe's help?  Do you really think he is purposely saying these stupid things to intentionally be dropped from the ticket?

Not everything is an organized plan.  Sometimes things happen all by themselves, like Joe being Joe.

Come on, didn't everyone expect this kind of stuff from the Smartest Man in Congress^tm the moment he was selected?  If anyone thinks that someoe with Joe's ego and desire for power would intentionally and voluntarily give Obama cover so Obie could drop him from the ticket, they really don't know the man at all.

41 Jesus, Joe, why don't you get a shovel?

42

For God's sake people, leave Biden alone.............................

 

 

 

....he's on a roll.

43 Is that not the definition used by the left over the last 8 years of the term "chickenhawk"

Ahhh, but they're OUR chickenhawks.

44 "... this buffoonish dolt's drooling idiotmouth."

Ace, first time I've laughed out loud in I don't know how long.

Thanks.

45 Well I for one am outraged at the timing of this story!

46 So now we've got Obama running against Biden.

Go, Joe, Go!

47 "When the stock market crashed, Franklin Roosevelt got on the television and didn't just talk about the princes of greed," Biden told Couric. "He said, 'Look, here's what happened.'"

And you can bet Jon Stewart is going to devote an entire segment to this.





Wait, what...?

48 There are two things I like about Biden.

1) He speaks his mind which is refreshing for a politician.
2) He's Obama's VP which allows for so much ammunition.

49

Now how would the media play this if it was a REP:

Democratic vice presidential nominee Joe Biden received five student draft deferments during the Vietnam War, the same number of deferments received by Vice President Dick Cheney, and later was disqualified from service because of asthma as a teenager.

Officials with Democratic presidential nominee Barack Obama's campaign released Biden's Selective Service records at the request of The Associated Press. Less detailed records were available from a National Archives facility in Philadelphia.

According to the documents, Biden, 65, received several deferments while he was an undergraduate at the University of Delaware and later as a law student at Syracuse University. A month after undergoing a physical exam in April 1968, Biden received a Selective Service classification of 1-Y, meaning he was available for service only in the event of national emergency.

"As a result of a physical exam on April 5, 1968, Joe Biden was classified 1-Y and disqualified from service because of asthma as a teenager," said David Wade, a campaign spokesman.

In "Promises to Keep," a memoir that was published last year and became an instant best-seller after he was tapped as Obama's running mate, Biden never mentions his asthma, recounting an active childhood, work as a lifeguard and football exploits in high school.

http://ap.google.com/article/ALeqM5izfGpO6ZwacY94y67o0C2t5zJytQD92TDD0O1

50

Posted by: RFC at September 23, 2008 04:33 PM (Sx0vj)

Winner!

51 You just know that The One is smoldering.  Like the guy on the 2 on 2 hoops team that thinks he is carrying the other sap.  Eventually when he gets behind, he starts blaming the mope he's playing with.

Watch...  it will happen.  Obama will privately act like Joe is weighting him down.  He'll slip and say something and we will pick up signs of discontent. Stories will start to circulate about how Obama is playing with one hand tied behind his back. Once it's out there... it's over for them.

Want to guess when the next time the two will appear together will be?  Before the election?

52 “If you want to know where Al Qaeda lives, you want to know where Bin Laden is, come back to Afghanistan with me,” Biden said. “Come back to the area where my helicopter was forced down, with a three-star general and three senators at 10,500 feet in the middle of those mountains. I can tell you where they are.”

Let me guess...he was a door gunner when they were forced down...sending rounds downrange on the hadji's...pilot and co-pilot got hit, so he had to land it while everyone else was shitting their pants...damn, Joe sounds like another Donk war hero - John "Rice Paddy Daddy" Kerry.

Bet he was put in for the Medal of Honor, too...

53 So says Commander McBiden:  "Did I ever tell you about the time my helicopter was shot down, and I came face to face with Osama Bin Laden?".

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1VPgKs70Uu4


Quite.

54

Don't forget about Biden's frequent stump lie that the driver that killed his wife and daughter back in 1972 was drunk at the time. He wasn't and Biden's office has had to admit that it was untrue.

55 "fun fact: Herbert Hoover was in fact the first public official to ever appear on a televised transmission."

I thought that person was Adolph Hitler.

56 You know, back when I was a freshman senator, during FDR's 5th term, -- right before he kicked off, and just after I'd advised Truman to drop the goshdarned bomb -- I told Frankie, "After we drop the bomb, I'm gonna look Tojo square in the eye and say 'Tojo, tell me how ass tastes.' "

57

#6

Andrew's Dad,

10.500 feet isn't a problem or at least isn't normally a problem. Choppers have landed at  Everest base camp which is significantly higher than 10,500 feet. I'm not positive about the elevation at Everest base camp but I believe its at least 17,000 feet.    

58 This sounds like a lead in to the new set-up......only Joe doesn't know about it. He's just being Joe, natch, which let's face it Obama knew all along....
 Joe Biden suddenly has to be replaced on the ticket because he is senile..... just like the time he suddenly "remembered" that he had such bad asthma that he couldn't go to Vietnam......
 Why go to all this trouble? Why not just state Joe's real problem? His I.Q. isn't as high as the room temperature in a cheap motel room on a cold day........

59 "Posted by: Hermit Dave at September 23, 2008 04:23 PM (WhFvm)"

Best post all day!

60 I'm Joe Biden and I'm not smarter than a fifth first grader  

61 The Spy Who Revised and Extended Me, pt. 2: The snow was coming down as heavy as Micheal Moore after a Coney Island hot dog competition. I sensed the nervousness of the crew. "Buck up, boys," says I. "This is our only chance to catch bin Laden before the brutal Afghan winter sets in like Barbara Walters on a black senator. Does everybody have their Miranda Warning index cards with them?" No one had any, so I gave them each some of the extra copies I had made. I looked over at Col. Bichslapp. He kept looking at me, and then he would look away, crying. Fear will do that to a man. This wasn't going to be a picnic, so I checked my gear one last time. Survival knife--check. Survival rations--check. Survival tent--check. Helicopter right behind us with fully-stocked commissary, bar, hot showers and native porters--check. I leaned in to speak to the Colonel. He looked at me and began to cry again. "Get a grip on yourself, man. Let's get this bird in the air. I've got to catch bin Laden so I can go home and help my friend Barack Obama bring Hope and Change." He was crying harder now. The rotors strained against the sky as we took off. Soon we plunging down the valley, flying just above the Superhighway of Terror looking for exit 63A that would take us to 1234 Mockingbird Lane, a modest little split-level where bin Laden lives. I wanted to pull over and ask directions but the Colonel wouldn't let us. I was just about to ask if we could pull over to use the restroom, when it hit us. I don't if it was a Stinger or an RPG. But we were going down. I hugged the floor like Tommy Smothers after a three-day wine tasting. I looked up through all the dust and I could make out an airman in uniform holding the door open for me to escape... "First floor, Senate gym, sir--they're expecting you for your usual 10:30 sauna and rubdown." bin Laden would have to wait.

62 who hasn't experienced a dangerous moment in his life

Since I live about 3 miles from him I feel the need to tell you that he has to make at least one left turn to get to the train station.  Don't say Joe doesn't take risks!

Also, all you hicks from other states, we here in the First State got TV way before the rest of you.  So suck it.  We currently are enjoying in home transporter systems as well as replicators, and are expected to get working flux capacitors in all our cars by the end of the year.

63 What if Eleanor Roosevelt could fly?

64

You rethuglicans are just awful.  We always knew you were a bunch of racist gay-bashing rednecks and now you are making fun of retards. 

I demand that you stop making fun of Joe Biden and all of the other retards!!!!

65

Biden ain't going anywhere.

This is Biden.  This is who he is.  This is why he was chosen.  He is the fricken laughtrack for the unfunniest, stiffest candidate put up by the Dems since......Kerry.

Man, I had forgotten what nerdy dork Kerry was in 2004.  My bad.  Maybe Obama was just looking for a runningmate to make him look like a serious and sober statesman....or something.

Fuck it.  I just don't get it.  Hillary, call your office.

 

66

Is this going to be the first election ever that a Presidential candidate had to debate his VP candidate?

That would be the highest rated TV program since FDR was in office.

67 "What if Eleanor Roosevelt could fly?"
 Are you trying to tell me she couldn't? What was the broom for then?

68

Who here would be shocked if Biden shows up for the debate in a red wig, plaid suit, and floppy shoes?

 

 

Anyone?

69

Fuck it.  I just don't get it.  Hillary, call your office.

Hillary aint going anywhere near this trainwreck.  If Obamuh drops Biden and takes Hillary, McCain holds the ultimate trump card. 

McCain would say: "He has only made ONE count em ONE decision in the last eight years and he changed his mind on that one only after the damage had been done"

70 I think Biden just gets things mixed up in his head. Which is not a great quality for a leader to have.

71 Ads have to be prepared to DEFINE a Biden/Clinton last minute switch as an unthinkable dirty trick.  At least make it clear that it was planned and not an accident.

72

Thanks one and all for all of the laughs on this thread.....you are some pretty funny morons!

On a serious note:  don't forget Biden's version of how his first wife and daughter were killed by a drunk driver who "drank his lunch".  Biden's version is untrue as toxicology tests were taken and the driver of the truck was stone cold sober - no alcohol, no drugs.  Investigators suspect that Biden's wife may have run a stop sign and was hit by the truck.  Biden has retold his version in public and print causing distress to the family of the truck driver to say the least.  They lost a beloved father and husband that day.

This event was tragic enough.  Why did he have to embellish it and make it seem more than what it was?   Why do this to the truck drivers family?

Biden Blames Drunk Driver

73

 

Paying taxes is the highest form of patriotism.

Dissent is only #2.

74

Anyone want to guess on the number of viewers that the Biden/Palin debate attracts?  I think that it will top any Pres/VP  debate history.

75 Is that not the definition used by the left over the last 8 years of the term "chickenhawk"

Hi, Dick Cheney here. Unless I've been in the bunker torturing hippies for too long - and really, how can you put a time limit on that? - I believe you need to be literate to use a definition which puts most of the left at a disadvantage here. Dragon Software, it's Satan's contribution to the internets.

76 Old Slow Joe better wear a cup to the debate.  He's going to think that he got hit with two chunks of clean coal where it hurts.

77

Slow Joe, Hillary, and John Kerry ought to get together and trade war stories - cause each of these senators are really in need of some fresh material.

Besides Joe's story from above ther's the one Hillary tells about her harrowing 1996 corkscrew landing at an air base in Bosnia amid a hail of hail of bullets with everybody sitting on their flak jackets to absorb all the incoming ordinance - which obviously forced the planned reception on the tarmac by well wishers... (just ask Sinbad and CBS who were both on the same plane). And last, not not least, the Air Force Col piloting the plane remembers it quite differently.

And who can ever forget John Kerry's incredible Christmas trip to Cambodia - when he contemplated what a SOB Richard Nixon was for sending him there? (trouble is Richard Nixon wasn't even president at the time and the boat Kerry used to make the roundtrip showed absoluely no signs of combat - not a single bullet hole, not a scratch, and zero after-action-report from any of the crew.

What is it about these people that make them such perpetual liars; genetics, narcissism, or simply party affiliation?

78 Re: helicopter service ceilings.  Some have already addressed it.  The Huey UH-1N is rated to 17,400 feet.  Dad flew Hueys (think it was the B and D models, but not sure on that), and has talked about going over 10,000 on occassion.  That was rare, though, since they were usually flying the missile lines out of Whiteman.

79

Eh, dead thread but just in case anyone looks.

New Biden Gaffe!  Trapper   quote:

"One of the debates I've had and finally won within the campaign, Claire, is -- we talk about how John McCain's 'changed,'" Biden said. "He hasn't changed a bit. John McCain has not changed one single solitary bit from the day I met him 34 years ago.

"He has never, never, never, never, never, never, never shared the values set that you share," Biden said. "He's an honorable, decent man, but John McCain truly believes, truly believes that you are corporate America's problem," he said to the trial lawyers. "And thank God you are."

Biden said that he's "done more than any other senator combined" for trial lawyers.   (end quote)

I love Joe!

80 Exit question ...

Q: Why was Herbert Hoover was President in 1929.

A: Apparently because the Governor of New York, FDR, was lost looking for a non-existent TV station.

81 . > The lie he's telling is that he knows where Al Qaeda is because Al Qaeda forced down his helicopter. Hey, he was channelling Tony Stark. Doesn't everyone visiting Afghanistan? .

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