March 30, 2006

Ministry Of Silly Links
— Ace

Several readers, most recently Scott, sent me this very goofy, kinda gay martial-arts fight video. (Some graphic violence.)

Apparently stripping your shirt off in the middle of a fight helps you dodge punches or something.

Posted by: Ace at 09:54 AM | Comments (6)
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George Will: Security Wall On Mexican Border Much Like Berlin Wall
— Ace


America, the only developed nation that shares a long -- 2,000-mile -- border with a Third World nation, could seal that border. East Germany showed how: walls, barbed wire, machine gun-toting border guards in towers, mine fields, large, irritable dogs. And we have modern technologies that East Germany never had: sophisticated sensors, unmanned surveillance drones, etc.

The difference is so obvious I won't insult you by noting it. (Captain's Quarters does, though, if you want to read it.)

Let me quote Robert Frost: Good fences make good neighbors.

And let me suggest some spin from the bad movie Speechless. A Republican there wanted to cut a ditch along the border; Michael Keaton's spin-doctor character began calling it "The Friendship Ditch," and it worked to change public opinion.

So let's not call it a wall at all. Let's just have a 2000 mile long "graffiti/mural installation," which will of course be painted by lots of avant-garde moron artists. We'll call it the Multicultural Street-Art Concrete Canvas Of Transnational Love.

There'll be watchtowers and barbed wire, but those are just there for the ironic statement they make. Or something.

George Will is certainly evolving as he ages, isn't he? The bowties and baseball-fetishism should have been a tipoff.

Posted by: Ace at 09:48 AM | Comments (41)
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American Dhimmitude: Book Stores Won't Carry Magazine With Mohammad Cartoons
— Ace

Strangely enough, they still sell books offensive to Christians. But then, the rightwing theocratic fascist Christian movement just doesn't have the pull it used to.

Borders and Waldenbooks stores will not stock the April-May issue of Free Inquiry magazine because it contains cartoons of the Prophet Muhammad that provoked deadly protests among Muslims in several countries.

"For us, the safety and security of our customers and employees is a top priority, and we believe that carrying this issue could challenge that priority," Borders Group Inc. spokeswoman Beth Bingham said Wednesday.

At least they're honest. They're not claiming they're making the decision due to "respect for different religious values," but because there's a decent chance adherents of The Religion of Perpetually Peevishness will come and bomb or burn bookstores.

Posted by: Ace at 09:29 AM | Comments (17)
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Rock Star To Return With "Supergroup" In Need Of Singer
— Ace

Yeah, I know, most of America wasn't watching this show last year, which was too bad, because it was really pretty good. It was like American Idol, sort of, except with rock songs instead of the thousandth rendition of The Carpenter's Superstar.

Afte various rumors of Queen or Van Halen using the show to find new singers, they've decided to just create a new band. But it's not just a bunch of session musicians or wannabes -- there's some genuine names in the group.

Motley Crue’s Tommy Lee, Metallica’s Jason Newsted, and Guns ‘n’ Roses’ Gilby Clarke will form the rest of the group, which will produce an album and tour in 2007. The show airs this summer, but it’s still casting, although time is running out. If you have what it takes to front a group with those four rockers, apply now.

Well, not huge names. Tommy Lee isn't primarily known for his drumming anymore, Jason Newsted got booted out of Metallica, and Gilby Clarke was as much of a crucial member of Guns 'n Roses as Jm. J. Bullock was.

But still.

The band is to be called "Supernova," which is just awful. They should have fans of the show send in their own recommendations and vote on the name, too. Can't be any worse than "Supernova."

Thanks to Chickpea.

Posted by: Ace at 09:24 AM | Comments (28)
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UN To Iran: Disarm Or We Will Taunt You A Second Time
— Ace

There will be a war.

Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice warned Iran on Thursday the "international community is united" in the dispute over its nuclear program, but a Tehran envoy defiantly rejected a U.N. call to reimpose a freeze on uranium enrichment.

Rice spoke after a meeting in Berlin among diplomats from the five veto-wielding members of the U.N. Security Council plus Germany over ways to press Iran to stop enriching uranium, which can be used for weapons. Iran says its program is peaceful.

The meeting follows agreement Wednesday by the 15-member Security Council to ask the U.N. nuclear watchdog, the International Atomic Energy Agency, to report back in 30 days on Iran's compliance with demands to stop enriching uranium.

In Vienna, Iran's chief representative to the IAEA, Ali Asghar Soltanieh, told The Associated Press that "it is impossible to go back to suspension."

"This enrichment matter is not reversible," Soltanieh said.

Reversibility Update: 700 ton bomb to be tested in Nevada.

These words "not reversible" you keep using. I do not think they mean what you think they mean.

Update: Mohammad ElBaradei, the UN's chief official in charge of allowing radical Islamic countries to acquire WMD's, sees no reason for sanctions, as there is yet no "imminent threat."

Here's a funny thing about "imminent threat." Coincidentally enough, I'm sure, when threats become imminent, there's usually not enough time left to check them.

Posted by: Ace at 08:56 AM | Comments (21)
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Relative: Whitney Houston A "Toothless" Crack Addict
— Ace

From the National Enquirer originally, so it may not be 100% on the level. The information comes from Bobby Brown's sister, who says she did crack with Whitney a lot, so she probably needs money, and the Enquirer isn't above paying for juicy stories.

But... who are we kidding here? She's a crackhead.

Songbird Whitney Houston has become a half-toothless crack addict who hangs out in dangerous drug dens and sees "demons" in fits of dope-induced paranoia, a new report claims.


"The truth needs to come out. She won't stay off the drugs. It's every single day. It's so ugly. Everyone is so scared she is going to OD," Tina Brown, 42, told the tabloid.


Lurid photos supplied by Brown, and reportedly taken in January at Houston's Georgia home, show a filthy bathroom littered with drug paraphernalia, including powder-coated spoons, garbage and debris.


The once-gorgeous, velvet-voiced crooner who wooed Kevin Costner in "The Bodyguard" now "spends her days locked in her bedroom amid piles of garbage, smoking crack, using sex toys to satisfy herself and ignoring personal hygiene," the tabloid says.

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. There's no need to get all judgemental about that kind of thing. I've heard some people find pleasuring themselves while smoking crack in a pile of rotting garbage and not bathing for months at a time a harmless and relaxing pasttime.

Again, so I've heard.

Thanks to Craig.

It Gets Worse: She's broke and being evicted from her home.

Rich people can almost get away with being degenerate drug addicts.

Not rich people? Not so much.

Posted by: Ace at 07:44 AM | Comments (38)
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They're Just Working Folks
— LauraW.

Regardless of the specific conflict, it is ever as Ronaldus Magnus declared: "Weakness is provocative."

Posted by: LauraW. at 07:43 AM | Comments (27)
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Democratic Pol: We Need Stupider, "Noisier" Reputation
— Ace

Not the best slogan with which to win a Democratic primary.

"Our congressman is the smartest person in the district, and we might be the only place in the country that can say that," Rinck said. "But he falls somewhat short on the charisma meter. And it might take a somewhat less intelligent -- although much noisier -- person to get some things done for this district."

They're the only district that has a Congressman who's the smartest in the district? Is he saying this guy is that smart, or his constituents are that dumb?

I don't think that's going to fly. Democrats tend to have Lake Woebegone syndrome, where they all imagine they're smarter than average.

Via Fark.

Posted by: Ace at 07:31 AM | Comments (9)
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March 29, 2006

The Correspondent's Dinner Thread
— LauraW.

I thought Cheney's opening 'Bridge to Nowhere' crack was pretty funny.

UPDATE: Here's a link for video of Cheney's bit.

Thanks, sugar britches.

Posted by: LauraW. at 05:17 PM | Comments (29)
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If at first you don't succeed, fail, fail again!
— Tanker

The Eurotrash never cease to amaze me. They have become permanently blinded by the fact that America has a bigger penis that they do. They created Airbus because they couldn't stand buying from Boeing anymore. Well, trillions of dollars of subsidies later they have garnered an equal footing in sales. But they still don't quite understand how to make planes that their customers actually want.

The first example was the Concorde. It wasn't exactly answering a market need, but it did fly faster than anything Boeing had. Of course, it was eventually retired after they realized flying empty planes was really a stupid idea.

Now, they have gone back to the well for a second drink of Kool Aid. This time they are making a plane to compete in the crucial mid-sized market. However, once again, its not what the market wants. Don't just take my word for it:

Two of the world's most powerful airplane buyers yesterday said Airbus should completely rethink the plane it has proposed to compete against Boeing's strong-selling new 787.

Steven Udvar-Hazy, probably the most respected figure in the global business of buying and selling airplanes, predicted the current version of Airbus' A350 would sell poorly and leave Boeing to dominate the lucrative market for midsized wide-bodies.

I'm sorry I couldn't post this one sooner. I was just laughing to hard!

I have another great article on the dual between Airbus and Boeing here.

Posted by: Tanker at 12:50 PM | Comments (133)
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CNN Reporter Jumping To Al Jazeera
— Ace

At least now he'll be drawing a check from the correct employer.

Posted by: Ace at 12:20 PM | Comments (28)
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Breakthrough: Intelligence Has Something To Do With The Brain
— Ace

...if you can believe that.

The thickness of the cortex — the outer layer of the brain that controls high-level functions such as memory — started off thinner than that of the other groups, but rapidly gained depth until it was thicker than normal during the early teens. All three groups converged, with the children having cortexes of roughly equal thickness by age 19. The strongest effect was seen in the prefrontal cortex, which controls planning and reasoning.

Let me see if I have this straight: The part of the brain most closely associated with higher-level functions is -- let me read this again, it's all too astounding -- thicker in those with higher IQ's.

"My first impression was 'wow, this is amazing," says Jeremy Gray, a psychologist at Yale University in New Haven, Connecticut.

Are only the stupid studying intelligence?

Maybe I'm missing something, but I thought it's been known for years that the thickness and number of "folds" in the cortex (folds give you more surface area, and thus more cotex tisssue) were greater in the intelligent.

In related breaking science news, people with big muscles tend to be stronger than those with small muscles.

Posted by: Ace at 12:19 PM | Comments (65)
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Scalia: I Did Not Have Relations With That Sicilian Gesture
— Ace

A reporter says it was the under-the-chin va fan cul gesture; Scalia says it was more of chin-stroking "I don't care guesture."

Does anyone care either way, besides our liberal suddenly-very-decorous media?

Who gives a rat's ass?

Posted by: Ace at 12:13 PM | Comments (26)
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Hooters Air Calls It Quits
— Ace

What a shock! It seems that men look for different qualities in an airline than they do in a buffalo-wing joint.

I never understood this. First of all, you can't travel with a woman on this airline, obviously. Well, you could, but how do you sell that? "Sure, some airlines are cheaper or are more frequently on time or have better safety records, but on Hooters Air, I get to look at tits!"

Tough sell.

Except for the occaisional bachelor party crew travelling to Vegas, where was the market, exactly, for in-flight cheesecake?

If you can't wait six hours to get to a titty bar at your destination city, you're probably not really in a position where you need to travel to get to a Mensa conference.

Posted by: Ace at 10:53 AM | Comments (29)
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The Immigration Bills
— Ace

I haven't been following this very closely, because it's just not one of my big interests and also because I expect that, as usual, absolutely no action will be taken to reduce or regularize illegal immigration.

Red State argues that the Senate version of the bill -- the McCain-Kennedy version -- is actually not as bad as many in the blogosphere argue.

Captain's Quarters, on the other hand, thinks it's awful.

The McCain-Kennedy proposal is relatively generous towards illegal immigrants. If we are going to be generous towards them, can we not finally build a real wall -- not a "virtual" one -- to reduce further illegal immigration as well as to regularize it?

I'm tired of hearing that a wall is racist. It's a border, easily and frequently crossed. It is our nation's right and duty to safeguard that border.

A wall will not fix everything. But if a wall can drastically reduce cross-border terrorism in Israel, it can reduce illegal immigration here.

Some of the best compromises come when people finally give in to their opponents, in exchange for equal concessions. Yes, fine, we lured these people in, and our economy would be badly disrupted were we to suddenly kick them out, so some form of a guest-worker program is needed.

But we also need a wall.

Let's do a trade.

Thanks to the Blogometer, which has further reactions.

Posted by: Ace at 09:09 AM | Comments (83)
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Afghan Convert Flees To Italy
— Ace

Where, in all likelihood, Muslims granted freedom by the capital state of the Catholic world will most likely murder him.

Freedom of religion in a Muslim country is a bit like closing time at a dive bar. You can do what you like, but you can't do it here.

Fixed: I thought I fixed this before. A bad "a href" command made this into a blank post. Bumpted. because the link wasn't previously visible.

Posted by: Ace at 08:47 AM | Comments (6)
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Muslims Invade AllahPundit's Old Blogsite
— Ace

Once again: Never delete your blog. Having established some sort of presence in the google and yahoo searches, the address itself is valuable.

Allah's old blog now reads:

The Quran is Honourable, If you have not religion you mast find one, and if you are astray you mast find road immediately.

Do not misled people if you are human.

Search about GOD, and remember that GOD is best friend and GOD love you ...

A nice enough sentiment; hard to disagree with, generally. Still, not really the sort of message one associates with AllahPundit.

As he comments, it's like the Moors have reconquered Spain.

Only because you let them in, my friend. Only because you let them in.

Posted by: Ace at 08:36 AM | Comments (20)
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Germans Seek Book-Banning Again: This Time The Koran
— Ace

Goldstein mulls the issue here and clarifies his mulling here.

You can't ban an idea, no matter how hateful. And as Jeff notes, the primary power of the Koran isn't its "book" quality, but it's talismanic quality. Banning the book would only increase the latter, which is the more problematic part of that.

Besides: It's wrong to ban books. That may be simplistic, but sometimes wisdom is pretty simple.

Posted by: Ace at 08:31 AM | Comments (18)
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Fundamentalist Muslm Dating Meeting Site
— Ace

You can't really "date" in Islam, I guess, but this site provides you with the opportunity to "meet" people you will immediately marry without dating.

Again: I guess.

I don't want to make fun of people's deeply-held and nonmurderous religious beliefs, but some things are just funny. Like, well, having pictures on a "meeting" site for fundamentalist Muslims, where women can't really show what their faces look like.

Like this woman. Seems like a catch:

My username is muslimah123 and I am a 27 years old Female.

I am Single and have No child.

I currently live in the city of phialdelphia, Pennsylvania in United States.

I would be willing to relocate.

I am originally from United States.

I speak the following languages: english, some arabic.

My religion is Islam. I am Very religious.

And her picture?

Now, the thing is, I've dated through the Internet before, I can tell you most people put up fake pictures of themselves, or pictures of themselves from twenty years ago. So I bet that her burka isn't half as satiny or ghostlike as it appears in that photo.

Another woman provides a photo:

She seems like a "party girl" to me. You can pretty much see her entire bridge of her nose here. So put this one in the "Just for fun, not for mom" category.

This woman actually holds up a can of hash in her picture, where you can actually see her face (!), in order to demonstrate her homemaking skills. Her bio:

I am an English major at Adelphi University in New York and I am in the teaching program. I have good domestic skills including cooking, cleaning,sewing, and raising farm animals. I’m an excellent conversationalist, of course only if you want me to be. Very subservient!

Very subservient? Good at cooking, cleaning, and raising farm animals? An excellent conversationalist, but only if I want her to be??!!

Is it too late to convert to Islam?

Thanks to Da Shadow Nose.

Posted by: Ace at 07:48 AM | Comments (85)
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Britney Spears "Moment Of Birth" Sculpture Half Weird, Half Tasteless
— Ace

I don't even mean the part about the sculpture depicting the moment of her pushing her child out of her womb. That, I suppose, is an interesting, if somewhat taboo, subject for art. Certainly we don't see that much, and almost not at all in art. So, a controversial but interesting subject for a painting or sculpture.

But... Why Britney Spears? And what's this business of a... bearskin rug? And why the hell is she on all fours, in "doggie style" position?

He added that other people were "upset" the sculpture was a pro-life monument.

The life-size work, by artist Daniel Edwards, features Spears crouched on all fours on a bear-skin rug as she gives birth.

It will be displayed at the gallery alongside a display case filled with anti-abortion materials.

Edwards said: "This is a new take on pro-life. Pro-lifers normally promote bloody images of abortion. This is the image of birth."

At some point, I hope, the trivial impulse for camp and arch (gay-culture-influenced) irony will finally be seen as passe and then we can perhaps have good art again.

But that impulse has been with our avant-retard artists for a while, and they don't seem to have beat that horse dead enough yet for their liking.

Posted by: Ace at 07:27 AM | Comments (28)
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