July 31, 2006

Travel Is So Tiring
— Ace

Hi again. I'm back. Sort of. Really exhausted, and of course I still have a lot of important stuff to catch up on (i.e., watching television).

As they say, I need a vacation from my vacation.

I'd like to thank my esteemed guestbloggers, but I'd like not to thank them now, because frankly, I'd like them to keep doing my job for me so long as they're willing. They've done a great job so far.

PS, Deb Frisch is in a full Sol Rosenberg meltdown, claiming she's going to sue me, FoxNews, Brit Hume, and all the people I work with and handle.

I'll have to remember to bring my glasses and my shoes, so I have them.

Not sure why she posted that threat at Patterico's place instead of mine... Oh yeah, because I banned her crazy, child-threatening ass.

Apparently Dr. Debby thinks she can continue her three days of infamy by simply continuing to spam other people's sites with further posts designed to make the Goldstein's feel insecure about their child's safety.

Sorry, Deb. You're an idiot, you have nothing to contribute whatsoever except odd sexual remarks about infants, and if you think you can somehow parlay that into consistent traffic for your site, you're sadly mistaken.

That link leads to her traffic meter, by the way, which is safe to click on, because it doesn't get counted as blog traffic. Thanks to Tom the Pooklekufr for that. It provides a good window into Dr. Debby's continuing need to post sexually-suggestive spam about infant children. She's still got that high from those two days when anyone at all bothered to click on her site, and damnit, she wants that feeling back.

As I instructed you earlier, Dr. Debbie: That wasn't "fifteen minutes of fame," it was instant infamy, and it just shows what an emotionally imbalanced moron you are to confuse the two. It was sad and creepy that you made such remarks the first time; now that you seem determined to continue making them in order to get more (negative) attention, it's beneath pathetic. Building audience requires q little more than creepy threats to children and submoronic poetry about "war$ington, deecee."*

I would pity you, Doc Debby, if I bothered to care about you at all. But I don't.

You really should be working your psychoses out on a psychiatrist's couch, not in the public forum of cyberspace.

A Bit More... Apparently Doctor Debby left this response to a comment on her site:

"No, Bilgeman. I'm not gonna denton myself. But I'm thinking real hard about ramseying you."

Remember, this is the woman who's threatening to sue people for "threatening" her.

She is insane, and needs, desperately, the intervention of the state.

Unrelated: The World's Smallest Cat. Three pounds. Quite frankly, if you put a gun to my head, I would have guessed that's about average cat weight, but they say it's the smallest, so there you go.

The cat's name is "Mr. Peebles," and they say it's named after a ventriloquist doll on Seinfeld. Trouble is, that doll was named "Mr. Marbles."

More likely it's named after "Mr. Peepers," my neighbor's cat, whom I immortalized in my Whoreblogging diary.

Thanks to Ogre Gunner.

* Bulding an audience also requires very stupid posts about misheard lyrics. How about a repost of one of the dumbest posts I've ever written? (Moderate content warning.)

PS, I never really misheard those lyrics. That's what makes this post even stupider.

Posted by: Ace at 02:25 PM | Comments (27)
Post contains 587 words, total size 4 kb.

1 I'm the best ever. I'm the most brutal and most vicious and most ruthless blogger there's ever been. There's no-one can stop me. Ace is a conqueror? No. I'm Reynolds, he's no Reynolds. I'm the best ever. There's never been anybody as ruthless. I'm Michelle Malkin. I'm Allahpundit, there's no one like me - I'm from their cloth. There's no one that can match me. My style is impetuous. My defense is impregnable, and I'm just ferocious. I want your heart. I want to eat his children. Praise be to Allah.

Posted by: Dr. Pooter at July 31, 2006 02:31 PM (8AHFL)

2 She is one sick puppy!

You know what the Bible says : "Physcian, heal thyself"

And in her case I think that will take massive doses of Zolof, Thorazine and Dilaudids.

Mr Minority

Posted by: Mr Minority at July 31, 2006 02:40 PM (d9Vel)

3 She just got nuttier. She made another one of her fantasy posts on who she is going to sue and all the money she is going to collect in damages. The woman is painfully ignorant about the law.

Posted by: shawn at July 31, 2006 02:42 PM (gIhLq)

4 I don't know what the hell on earth she thinks her cause of action is.

I imagine that lawyers will be just jumping at the chance to represent an imbecilic lunatic who fantasizes sexually about children.

In order to sue super-high-income deep-pockets bloggers.

Posted by: ace at July 31, 2006 02:50 PM (h7Mal)

5 That keeton is just the cutest!

Posted by: Mario van Peebles at July 31, 2006 02:53 PM (q1bX5)

6 She's the worse kind of client, too -- she won't shut the fuck up. lol! Can you imagine anyone being able to control her?

Posted by: shawn at July 31, 2006 02:58 PM (gIhLq)

7 She'll know what a cause of action is soon enough.

Posted by: richard mcenroe at July 31, 2006 02:58 PM (w+ipT)

8 Huh. Deb and I have the same traffic.

And I've never threatened so much as a flea!

Dave at Garfield Ridge

Posted by: Dave at Garfield Ridge at July 31, 2006 02:58 PM (kc9zT)

9 She posted earlier that she wanted things to de-escalate between her and Jeff and at the same time she states she wants to sue him. She is unable to see the contradiction there. Like when she begged you and Blackfive for favors and then turns around and slams you. She really is clueless.

Posted by: shawn at July 31, 2006 03:00 PM (gIhLq)

10 Don't tell Ace, but I'm thinking that long-time readers of this site (lurkers welcome!) ought to pool our resources and launch a class action lawsuit of our own, against AoS HQ. Preying on morons can get you into serious trouble with the Feds, and it's high time we cashed in on our vulnerability.

Naturally, should Ace or his army of lawyers ask, we're open-minded about an out of court settlement...

Posted by: sandy burger at July 31, 2006 03:01 PM (Cpse7)

11 Sandy, if you want access to Ace's porn collection, just ask him.

Posted by: shawn at July 31, 2006 03:02 PM (gIhLq)

12 Well, Dave, if it's any consolation, blog popularity is not based on merit (intelligence, hard work, that sort of that). It's based on, you know, popularity.

Posted by: sandy burger at July 31, 2006 03:06 PM (Cpse7)

13 I know that she's sick, but I'm having trouble finding any sympathy for this woman.

I think I understand now why people once believed in demonic possession. Veiled threats toward a child? Purely evil.

Posted by: Warden at July 31, 2006 03:08 PM (QWUn5)

14 shawn, I don't want "access" to Ace's porn collection. I just want some of it deleted, and all copies destroyed. Let's just say that I have my own personal reasons for this, and leave it at that.

Posted by: sandy burger at July 31, 2006 03:09 PM (PQyeQ)

15 Sandy,
Too late, Ace has already stashed away all those pics of you with the 3 sheep, the female midget wrestler, 5 yards of garden hose and the blow-up Hillary Doll all in a baby pool filled with Cisco.

Mr Minority

Posted by: Mr Minority at July 31, 2006 03:20 PM (d9Vel)

16 Ace, I closed the link tag for "sadly mistaken."

Now get some sleep.

Posted by: Michael at July 31, 2006 03:35 PM (xTnLp)

17 On the website with the 'worlds smallest cat' was this picture of this boat having a 'Very Bad Day'


ALASKA -- In this photo released by the U.S. Coast Guard, the Cougar Ace maintains its position about 240 miles south of Adak in the North Pacific Ocean. As of noon Tuesday, the ship, hundreds of miles off Alaska's Aleutian Islands, is listing 60 degrees to port. The keel and the propeller are out of the water. It is stable, and does not appear to be sinking, according to the U.S. Coast Guard. (07/28/06 AP Photo/Official Coast Guard photo courtesy of Coast Guard cutter Rush)

Posted by: Some drunk ship Captain at July 31, 2006 03:40 PM (GS/DX)

18 The ship's crew were very lucky that this happened in the summer. The seas up there during the winter can get so rough that a rescue is damn near impossible. I know, because I was in the Coast Guard stationed in Alaska and had to rescue several ship up around Adak and north of it.

Mr Minority

Posted by: Mr Minority at July 31, 2006 03:50 PM (d9Vel)

19 At the risk of sounding like a link whore,

Could you hyperlink my name to my blog?

http://hamstermotor.mo time.com

Remove the space between Mo and Time.

Posted by: Tom the Pooklekufr at July 31, 2006 04:03 PM (j+jUc)

20 Bulding an audience also requires very stupid posts about misheard lyrics.

Okay, start here.

My wife  someone very close to me also used to think Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds had the lyric:
"The girl with colitis goes by"

Posted by: Tom M at July 31, 2006 04:45 PM (ARXgj)

21 Wo, sorry for the screaming. I'll get the hang of TNCT, yet.

Posted by: Tom M at July 31, 2006 04:45 PM (ARXgj)

22 So long as you're in a reminiscing mood, could you repost a link to the "Evil Carnivorous Monkey Head" post? Just asking, because it's been the subject of a couple of inside jokes here lately that new readers might not know.

Plus it has sentimental value for me - it was what addicted me to this blog after noticing you at the top of Michelle's blogroll.

Posted by: cat4amt at July 31, 2006 05:18 PM (3quZI)

23 Just how big are the kittens itty bitty kitty

Posted by: spurwing plover at July 31, 2006 05:47 PM (vnSBY)

24 Dave @Garfield. Of course you threaten people. Just not out loud. Much like Ms. (Mz, Ma,Mo?) Deb, your thoughts are powerful. And what with you being here in NoVa I have to take the brunt so that others might live.

Posted by: Uncle Pinky at July 31, 2006 05:48 PM (E/gF4)

25 Welcome back, my Snoogles. Everyone missed you this weekend....:-(

Posted by: Feisty at July 31, 2006 07:06 PM (G//s0)

26 Howdy Ace;

Is this the lounge for people who get threatened by the FrischFailure?

Or is it over at Patterico's?

Heck, at the rate she's going, we could prolly all end up overflowing the Meadowlands.

You ever heard the joke where the punchline ends with someone holding a gun to their own head, and angrily declaring:

"What are YOU laughing at? YOU'RE NEXT!"

That's what it's like to be threatened by Doctor Looooser.

I mean really..."Ramseying"? WTF is that supposed to mean?

That she'd bludgeon and strangle me if I was a 7 year old girl?

Anyway...nice place ya got...where's the coffee pot?


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