August 31, 2005

Too Rude For a Headline
— Ace

Headline and story after the jump. The weak of stomach may want to pass on this one. Drunk Attempts To Beat Brethalyzer By Stuffing Mouth... With Feces

TORONTO -- An accused drunk driver tried but failed to foil a police breathalyser after stuffing his mouth full of feces. "I don't think alcohol alone would make you do something as disgusting as that," Insp. Tom McDonald said.

In related news, a Montreal man attempted to beat a jaywalking ticket by sticking his head up a dead cow's ass. "I thought it was the perfect alibi," the man said later.

Here's the link.

Thanks to cutaway.

Posted by: Ace at 07:08 AM | Comments (14)
Post contains 114 words, total size 1 kb.

1 This drunk with a mouth full of feces - he doesn't happen go by the moniker "Anon," does he?

Posted by: Rocketeer at August 31, 2005 07:15 AM (p0VwG)

2 Thanks.

Guess I'll just throw away this Cadbury bar, you F***.

Posted by: lauraw at August 31, 2005 07:22 AM (0+tK7)

3 I thought I read about this a few months ago... but, UGH!

Posted by: fat kid at August 31, 2005 07:22 AM (yHxMk)

4 It gives a whole new meaning to the term "shit breath"

Posted by: River Rat at August 31, 2005 07:30 AM (SSrbd)

5 Now that's a potty mouth.

Posted by: Slublog at August 31, 2005 07:35 AM (V7NgR)

6 Rocketeer

I was thinking the same thing. However it is not only Anon, the left must be passing around a big ole' bowl of shit dip.

Posted by: lenore at August 31, 2005 07:36 AM (1ZNvu)

7 Well. I've got to admit, I really didn't see that coming.

Last week, a guy in my fair city was pulled over for suspicion of driving under the influence, and he decided to escape the charge by leaping off the 30-foot-high overpass where he and the cops were parked.

I'd like to blame stunts like that and the crapmuncher on impaired judgment from alcohol, but there's got to be something else going on. I mean, I went on a few horrendous benders back in my college days, but I never woke up with my mouth tasting that bad.

Posted by: utron at August 31, 2005 07:46 AM (CgIkY)

8 Either way, the guy was shitfaced.

Posted by: at August 31, 2005 07:46 AM (ai4Nk)

9 Damn, I knew there was a good headline. Where were you guys twenty minutes ago?

Posted by: ace at August 31, 2005 07:59 AM (W7JEQ)

10 Hmm. How's this: "It Could Have Been Worse. It Could Have Been Vegemite."

Posted by: utron at August 31, 2005 08:12 AM (CgIkY)

11 FWIW: Cutaway = Tony

I always strive to root out tastiest bits of foolhardiness from around the world.

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