September 29, 2016

The Thursday ONT is Puttin' on the Gifs! [Weirddave]
— Open Blogger

WARNING, THIS IS A GIF HEAVY POST. IT MAY LOAD SLOWLY BELOW THE CUT

ETA Apparently, the gifs were still causing problems for some people, even below the cut. I've changed all of the embedded gif to links. Click the link below each line to view the gif.

I'd like to open by letting you all know what an honor it is to be asked to address this distinguished ONT. I know it's been a long day for most of you, so I'll try to keep this brief.

* pause for applause *


What does one say to a group of such fine young men and women? Certainly, I may have life experiences that you lack, but that is only due to my advanced age and the good luck I've had not to fall into any open manholes. You people today are certainly smarter than I was at your age, and a good many of you are better looking – not you Ace. Again, what does one say to such bright young group of future leaders? There's a reason these things run to cliches, and that's because those of us tapped to address groups like this ultimately only have our life experiences to fall back on. With that in mind, I'd like share just a few words of advice.

First of all, be aware that it's a mean old world out there. You will run into lots of folks who don't have your best interests at heart.

Link to Gif

You need to be on your guard at times. In some cases, betrayal will come from those who you trust the most, like a friend, a lover - or even a parent.

Link to Gif

Be careful, and always make sure you're wearing proper safety equipment,

Link to Gif

but make sure you take a moment to ensure that that person who you think is screwing with you isn't doing you a huge favor instead.


Link to Gif

That doesn't mean that you should approach life with fear. Be bold and confident of your abilities, and there is no limit to what you can accomplish.

Link to Gif

Take the time to cultivate good friendships. Together two people can often achieve feats which a single person would find impossible.

Link to Gif

And when you find that friend, make sure you hold on to them. There is nothing more valuable in the world.

Link to Gif

Also, make sure you take the time to improve yourself. Try to exercise every day, and you'll be astonished to find out how much better you feel.

Link to Gif


Most of you will shortly be entering the working world, and this will present its own set of challenges. There will be times when you feel like the mob is closing in on you, and there is no escape.

Link to Gif

When this happens, relax. Take a deep breath. If it turns out that mistakes were made, don't be afraid to admit it. You'll find that honest humility serves you well in most situations.

Link to Gif

The last thing you want to do is to act in haste and anger your co-workers.

Link to Gif

You will fail often,

Link to Gif

but don't let that stop you. Power through and keep going.

Link to Gif

At times, it will seem that God himself has it in for you,

Link to Gif

but it's important that you keep experimenting with new things,

Link to Gif

and looking for innovative new ways to solve old problems.

Link to Gif

If you can do that while retaining a joy in your work,

Link to Gif

well, you'll find that as time goes on, you'll get better and better at your job,

Link to Gif

until one day you'll be able to nail any task put before you LIKE A BOSS.

Link to Gif


Relationships present a special challenge. I know none of you believe it now, but at some point in your life, you WILL get caught in a compromising position.

Link to Gif

You can't avoid it, but the chances of it happening will be greatly decreased if you make an effort not to lose control of yourself in the pursuit of your passions.

Link to Gif


In closing, let me just remind you to always take a moment to celebrate your accomplishments,

Link to Gif

and always, always make sure that you're the coolest person in the room.

Link to Gif

Thank you for having me. May God bless the ONT, and don't forget The Yahoo Group! Goodnight!


(All of the Gifs used in this post were taken from the @cctv_idiots Twitter feed.)

SINCE THE GIFS ARE SLOWING EVERYBODY DOWN, THERE IS A NEW THREAD ABOVE FOR COMMENTS

Posted by: Open Blogger at 05:30 PM | Comments (32)
Post contains 812 words, total size 6 kb.

1 Cleanliness is Next to Sharia We've seen public schools teach the Islamic Shahada, encourage "Muslim" clothing be worn, or circulating the Koran. Now, they seem to be taking all that for granted... More: http://politicalhat.com/?p=12530

Posted by: The Political Hat at September 29, 2016 05:33 PM (vBeA5)

2 Whoa, scrolling down all this is hard.

Posted by: boulder terlit hobo at September 29, 2016 05:33 PM (6FqZa)

3 Early

Posted by: French Jeton at September 29, 2016 05:34 PM (WMvHw)

4 Top ten again.

Posted by: Country Boy - Deplorable and proud of it at September 29, 2016 05:34 PM (/+VTF)

5 Oh, this isn't going to end well.

Posted by: Frod Gnebbisher at September 29, 2016 05:35 PM (Kzf4A)

6 Phone murder ONT is here!

Posted by: .87c at September 29, 2016 05:35 PM (APdPY)

7 Loading Loading Loading Loading Loading Loading Loading . . . . . Loading

Posted by: fixerupper at September 29, 2016 05:38 PM (JmjOe)

8 It ain't just the phone. Weirddave, what in hell have you done?!?

Posted by: Deplorable tcn in AK at September 29, 2016 05:39 PM (cm1Bl)

9 Flubbing around the ONT with a pair of binoculars is my job!

Posted by: Ned Flubber at September 29, 2016 05:39 PM (WC+jn)

10 Jump down the shelters to get away The boys are cockin' up their guns Tell us general, is it party time? If it is can we all come Don't think that we don't know Don't think that we're not trying Don't think we move too slow It's no use after crying Saying It's a mistake, it's a mistake It's a mistake, it's a mistake After the laughter as died away And all the boys have had their fun No surface noise now, not much to say They've got the bad guys on the run Don't try to say you're sorry Don't say he drew his gun They've gone and grabbed old Ronnie He's not the only one saying It's a mistake, it's a mistake It's a mistake, it's a mistake Tell us commander, what do you think? Cause we know that you love all that power Is it on then, are we on the brink? We wish you'd all throw in the towel We'll not fade out too soon Not in this finest hour Whistle your favorite tune We'll send a card and flower Saying It's a mistake, it's a mistake It's a mistake, it's a mistake

Posted by: qdpsteve at September 29, 2016 05:40 PM (NlMkN)

11 No baseball GIFs?

Posted by: Basement Cat at September 29, 2016 05:40 PM (3C9q2)

12 Can't get the site to load on either phone or laptop.

Posted by: Country Boy - Deplorable and proud of it at September 29, 2016 05:41 PM (heN73)

13 Thanks WD, but I am out. Can not let one thread kill my monthly data plan.

Posted by: GrampyB at September 29, 2016 05:41 PM (R0oIh)

14 Well, so much for this ONT. Loading the page, due to all the gifs, takes forever.

Posted by: RickZ at September 29, 2016 05:41 PM (BzDuh)

15 This is working swimmingly.

Posted by: garrett at September 29, 2016 05:42 PM (0BkbS)

16 no MILITARIZED THUG COPS!!!!!11!! gifs? oh well

Posted by: navycopjoe at September 29, 2016 05:42 PM (f7T7k)

17 There's a great piece linked in sock by some guy I've never heard of before---Scot McAdams. He's a cartoonist or something... I think... or something. Still. A good read.

Posted by: [/i][/b]andycanuck[/s][/u] at September 29, 2016 05:43 PM (LdMbv)

18 Are these supposed to be like moving or something?

Posted by: Country Boy - Deplorable and proud of it at September 29, 2016 05:43 PM (heN73)

19 Everyone that tries fails. Failures don't get back up. Like the the gifs on this ont.

Posted by: ryukyu at September 29, 2016 05:44 PM (5hp5+)

20 Hey everybody.

Posted by: qdpsteve at September 29, 2016 05:44 PM (NlMkN)

21 can a guy get the barrel for blowing the post with too many gifs?

Posted by: navycopjoe at September 29, 2016 05:45 PM (f7T7k)

22 Google is charging .45 a minute load time and the site refuses to totally load...I can get a better rate at 'what the fuck.com'

Posted by: Ned Flubber at September 29, 2016 05:45 PM (WC+jn)

23 15 This is working swimmingly. Posted by: garrett at September 29, 2016 10:42 PM (0BkbS) As God as my witness I thought turkeys could fly

Posted by: Misanthropic Humanitarian at September 29, 2016 05:45 PM (voOPb)

24 They taught Sha-na-na at my public school. We also had shu-bop-sha-boom on Friday nights.

Posted by: gNewt....in the basket...forever censored at September 29, 2016 05:46 PM (Z9mio)

25 The hamsters are having a stroke...

Posted by: The Political Hat at September 29, 2016 05:46 PM (vBeA5)

26 This is the most fucked up ONT I have ever seen.

Posted by: 1sttofight at September 29, 2016 05:46 PM (FLUCd)

27 I just show up for the comments anyways.

Posted by: Country Boy - Deplorable and proud of it at September 29, 2016 05:47 PM (heN73)

28 It works for me! I like it-nice job.

Posted by: LASue at September 29, 2016 05:47 PM (wgFcF)

29 Actually that's not true, I've enjoyed the post Maet ONT's as much as his, so far anyways.

Posted by: Country Boy - Deplorable and proud of it at September 29, 2016 05:47 PM (heN73)

30 cAN'T rEAD thinGs text goeEs Up and DDown shit dow3nleads sLOW fuckthisnoise

Posted by: Inspector Cussword at September 29, 2016 05:48 PM (c1VpD)

31 I guess I should just let this churn for awhile.

Posted by: Grump928(C) at September 29, 2016 05:48 PM (rwI+c)

32 I think I killed 25 hamsters, but I'm here!

Posted by: bluebell at September 29, 2016 05:48 PM (xpSCc)

Hide Comments | Add Comment




What colour is a green orange?




88kb generated in CPU 0.53, elapsed 1.4385 seconds.
64 queries taking 1.3366 seconds, 270 records returned.
Powered by Minx 1.1.6c-pink.