February 29, 2008

The Hillary* Red Phone Ringing at 3am Ad
— Dave in Texas

It just seems lame. Is it because I can't take her seriously?

I'm too young to recall the Johnson ad (shut up), which I've heard ran just one time, but hey, in 64 you could cover the nation in 3 networks. Was it more powerful?

I think Mondale ran one like this against Gary Hart too, before he imploded. I was busy that year.

The Johnson ad, which most of us have seen:

Well. At least that Daisy kid is older than me.


Posted by: Dave in Texas at 06:38 PM | Comments (75)
Post contains 100 words, total size 1 kb.


You let me worry about my kids, cunt. 

Posted by: Warden at February 29, 2008 06:42 PM (9uFbt)

2 Yes, it's very lame. Does Hillary think people want her to answer the phone?

She "knows" the Military? Everybody knows she despises the military.

Ack! *spit* Gag!

Posted by: Nice Deb at February 29, 2008 06:44 PM (jzAkt)


Damnit, Warden, I'm the one who is supposed to scream "CUNT" at  my computer before anyone else, whenever this stupid bitch's face/voice pops up!!!

Jeez, I can't wait for her to finally lose this race.  My fucking blood pressure can't take much more of her.

Posted by: Sharkman at February 29, 2008 06:52 PM (UioS4)

4 It's lame.  Lame lame lame lame lame!

Posted by: alexthechick at February 29, 2008 06:57 PM (jWNHD)

5 What a stupid ad.  I'd much rather have McCain than either of the 2 Socialists Democrats answering that phone.

Of course, I'd prefer Zombie Reagan or Zombie Teddy Roosevelt to McCain.

Posted by: JayC at February 29, 2008 07:02 PM (w3Zn1)


I'm convinced  !!

Hillary is the best Brinks Home Security operator available. 

Posted by: spc at February 29, 2008 07:06 PM (8wOhY)

7 You're just trying to give her free advertising to help her out. Good call!

Posted by: Christoph at February 29, 2008 07:07 PM (hawOV)

8 The Red Phone is answered by a machine. "Para ayuda en Espanol, marque numero ocho."

Posted by: FishFearMe at February 29, 2008 07:16 PM (8nB5X)

9 I bet the "Bear in the Woods" ad would have people shitting bricks if it ran today...


Posted by: Asher at February 29, 2008 07:24 PM (YMyoC)

10 I think it's a terrific ad for Senator McCain. For Senator Clinton, not so much.

Alexthechick is channelling Soundgarden off Almost Live's "lame list."

Posted by: Christopher Taylor at February 29, 2008 07:44 PM (3+3kx)

11 (Sleepy, slurred, southern man's voice answering phone)  Hullo, Monica?

(Sound of lamp crashing against wall)

(Narrator)  It's 3 a.m. in the White House.  Who do you think is going to answer the phone?

Posted by: Average American Voter at February 29, 2008 07:48 PM (RiRew)

12 Har!

Good one AAV.

Posted by: Nice Deb at February 29, 2008 07:56 PM (jzAkt)

13 In the old 60s TV seires BATMAN they used a red beeping flashing phone called the BATPHONE or HOT LINE

Posted by: Spurwing Plover at February 29, 2008 08:30 PM (n7v4a)

14 I like the ad, but I have to ask why is Hillary making ads for John McCain?

Posted by: Sara at February 29, 2008 08:45 PM (Wi/N0)


(Sound of dialling)


Doo-Dah-Dee!  The number you have dialed is not available.  At least, not to you peons.  Please hang up and call someone who gives a shit.

(Dial tone)

Posted by: Secundus at February 29, 2008 08:53 PM (PfEg1)

16 I bet the "Bear in the Woods" ad would have people shitting bricks if it ran today... If a Bear shits bricks in the woods, and no one hears it, does it make a stink?

Posted by: cheshirecat at February 29, 2008 08:58 PM (CpLk9)

17 I'm here in Austin. I'm grudgingly going to vote for her. That ad really convinced me. That's why I'm going to actually vote for a Clinton. Actually, it's not really a vote for Hillary, it's more of a way to improve my pathetic social life since I'm the Republican left here. I'm so lonely.

Posted by: CozMark at February 29, 2008 08:59 PM (cBfLv)

18 Crappy production values -- like a 80s infomercial.

Posted by: someone at February 29, 2008 09:44 PM (2z2WN)

19 For such a supposedly vital, potentially world-changing call, it sure rings for a loooong time before being picked up, doesn't it....?

Posted by: JuliaM at February 29, 2008 10:19 PM (Ydcpi)

20 A significant reason the daisy ad worked was the media was completely in the tank for LBJ. Something so patently over the top probably won't work otherwise.

Posted by: MlR at February 29, 2008 10:26 PM (N7h3D)

21 I love how Clinton basically does every single thing the dems pretend Bush does.  This kind of scare tactic would never work for Mccain. Can you imagine it?  Though I think it would make a lot more sense.

Scaring voters?  Anyone who really is serious about terror ain't voting for Obama or Clinton, who would lie about the surge to get a couple of stupid votes.

Posted by: Gohuckyourself at February 29, 2008 10:28 PM (8jYMc)


Is she fucking kidding?  Was this really put out by the Hillary campaign?

It's 3am.


Bill!  Answer the phone!

I'm... almost... done... another... (harder!  I'm coming!)

Oh, alright.

Madam President, the US has been attacked!!!

Form a focus group and commission a poll immediately!  I need to know how this will affect my re-election chances.  Get Harold Ickes on the line NOW!  Did you hear me?

Madam President, we need an answer...

You're fired you misogynist!  Don't question my judgement because I'm mostly a woman!  (Dials Barbara Streisand)


Babs!  What do we do?  We're being attac...

Big fucking mushroom cloud


Posted by: Hollowpoint at February 29, 2008 10:32 PM (v8vVW)


I'm not scared for the threat... I'm sacred because "Slick Will ‘ll have his hand on the dial!

Now that they mention it…


Posted by: mb at February 29, 2008 11:56 PM (TTXUJ)

24 Another example of the "Bear ad" genre: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZNoUbfTtI3g Clinton's ad seems pretty good to me, given her circumstances. It aims one sure message at the single most salient argument against Obama. It's not meant to indicate that she's as experienced as McCain--her campaign isn't looking beyond Tuesday, much less this November--but it does address the one thing his supporters may be suspect about. Certainly speaks to one of the key reasons the guy scares the hell out of me. of course, her campaign is horsefucked, so it's academic anyway at this point.

Posted by: railwriter at March 01, 2008 01:00 AM (ACTD5)

25 Here in Houston Obama is dominating the airwaves. I don't recall a single Clinton commercial on TV or radio. The Obama commercial (I don't recall two different ones) is him speaking of hope and change. I think the radio commercial is just the TV commercial sound. Pretty vapid. He doesn't say that he will raise my taxes or mention his plan to surrender to Al Qaeda in Iraq and then counter attack later. He doesn't talk about his socialist ideals at all. I'm not a lawyer but don't you think I have grounds for a truth in labeling lawsuit?

Posted by: klrtz1 at March 01, 2008 02:37 AM (rwY2X)


Hollowpoint, why did you feel it necessary to conjure a mental image of Bill and Hillary bumping uglies?  Do you hate us?  Are you an Al-Quaida plant, sent to sap our morale?

Heh.  I can just see her, glasses on, lying there reading a magazine with pasty, flabby Bill on top.  "Are you fucking done yet?"


Posted by: Secundus at March 01, 2008 02:43 AM (PfEg1)

27 when will the MSM get over this silly notion that Mrs. Clinton is smart?

Posted by: DavidL at March 01, 2008 03:05 AM (KCjRm)

28 Re: lawsuit: if you know Obama will raise my taxes (if he can) and I know it and Obama knows it, then whenever Obama doesn't say so isn't that a case of Obama not telling the truth? I ask you, judge, jury and members of the press, is Obama not not telling the truth or is Obama not telling the truth?

Unfortunately, Obama would probably ask for a jury of his peers to decide the question and since Obama is peerless (he's the bestiest of the bestiest of the best) the only one on the jury would be Obama himself. Then if he was not not telling the truth he would vote to acquit because he's innocent and if he was not telling the truth he would likely also vote to acquit because of his pattern of not telling the truth.

BTW in the spell checker for this, the first four options for Obama are Alabama related. Clearly these options are "related to race". I apologize.

Posted by: klrtz1 at March 01, 2008 03:05 AM (rwY2X)


Here in Houston Obama is dominating the airwaves. I don't recall a single Clinton commercial on TV or radio.


same here in Central Texas - haven't heard an ad for Hillary at all, but I'll bet she's running some on all Spanish language stations.

Posted by: Gideon at March 01, 2008 03:42 AM (pzen5)

30 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K50bKhktUGw&feature=related

Still better

Posted by: Asher at March 01, 2008 04:07 AM (YMyoC)


Seriously? They put this shit on the air?


First of all, the poor schmuck who wakes up Hillary to say "phone call, Bitch" is going to get whacked upside the head with said phone.

Wow- they are fresh out of ideas at Camp Hillary.

Posted by: Too many bats at March 01, 2008 04:48 AM (aJtCl)

32 Hello, there. It's John. I am a proud conservative liberal Republican running a disprited campaign against a Liberal like you, Hillary. Just saying, I will not surrender to Iraq, but I surely will to you. Now get your beauty sleep and sweet dreams, lady.

Posted by: maverick muse at March 01, 2008 05:12 AM (LYKFp)


#20 is right.  I was working of AuH2O in 64.  This was the first real over the top attack ad.  Willie Horton?  shit that was table tennis next to the daisy ad.  It ran once and then the MSM ran it free for Johnson over and over.  It was WAY over the line, but it worked and the GOP never again let those assholes pull that shit without a reply.  I also think it is one reason Nixon was so paranoid, that and having the '60 election stolen from him, really harden that sucker.

Duh, huh

Posted by: kempermanx at March 01, 2008 05:28 AM (iLWmI)

34 Why are the letters "NIG" on the kid's pajamas?

Posted by: Tinian at March 01, 2008 05:34 AM (1Mq7K)


Everybody knows that if you dial Pennsylvania 6-Five Thousand at 0300, you'll get...

Fred Dalton Thompson.

Now you can sleep.

Posted by: central casting at March 01, 2008 05:36 AM (jSKdE)


(Loud snoring, phone rings) Huh, what...  (picks up phone)

"This is the President."  (Listens)

"Bill, Bill... Wake u....."

(Hand over the receiver) "Where's that no good husband of mine. Son of a bitch.  I bet he's with that fat ass receptionist over in the West Wing."

(Hand off receiver)  "Look, Sandy.  I have a real crisis over here...  Burger!  Shut up!  I don't care if Al Qaeida attacked New York.  You're the Secretary of Defense. Do something!   Send Jimmy Carter over there to negotiate."  (Slams down phone)

(Picks up phone and punches buttons)  Secret Service!  This is the President!  You get your ass over to the West Wing and find my husband!  If he's with that bitch again, shoot him.  Shoot her too!"

(Puts down phone.  Pulls covers over her head.  Loud snoring resumes.)

(Voiceover) "When the phone rings in the White House, who would you want to answer it?"

Posted by: The Reiver at March 01, 2008 05:45 AM (7Zs+Q)

37 The Johnson ad ran once, true. But nakedly partisan ABCCBSNBC made literally hundreds of references to it. Ergo its effect

Posted by: ricpic at March 01, 2008 06:13 AM (o03rx)

38 Arreto el hombre negro Obama!

Posted by: ricpic at March 01, 2008 06:15 AM (o03rx)

39 Anyone who has read the book The Sum of All Fears knows what an Obama presidency would be like in an emergency. I couldn't help thinking of that book's president when 9/11 happened and thanking God almighty that Al Gore wasn't in office.

Posted by: Christopher Taylor at March 01, 2008 06:35 AM (3+3kx)

40 Christopher:

On 9/11, I was really glad Gore wasn't president.

And I had VOTED for him.

Eech. Now I need to go wash off.

Posted by: qrstuv at March 01, 2008 06:42 AM (vIO8c)

I'd rather have Clinton answer the phone than Obama. I hope she does win Texas. I want to see a down and dirty fight culminating in the mother of all battles a the dnc.  Come on, it'll be fun.

Posted by: Rinnie at March 01, 2008 07:07 AM (GuQpe)

42 I hope John McCain remembers to send Hillary an FTD bouquet.  It's the least he could do after her thoughtful gift.

Posted by: Mikey NTH at March 01, 2008 07:25 AM (VnT5/)


Hollowpoint, why did you feel it necessary to conjure a mental image of Bill and Hillary bumping uglies?  Do you hate us?  Are you an Al-Quaida plant, sent to sap our morale?

Sorry, the idea was that Bill was bumping uglies with some other woman so he was too busy to pick up the phone.

I might've been slightly drunk when I wrote that.

Posted by: Hollowpoint at March 01, 2008 08:12 AM (v8vVW)

44 Ha! I love the idea that something important happens in the world and The World gets on the horn and rings the red phone, and the POTUS is just sitting there to answer it. It's so...comic booky. Hey, JayC! I gots yer Zombie Reagan right here.

Posted by: S. Weasel at March 01, 2008 08:29 AM (9jA8/)

45 Shoot! I muffed the link. Try this.

Posted by: S. Weasel at March 01, 2008 08:30 AM (9jA8/)

46 Hi, Hillary?  Hi, yeah.  This is 1987.  I was wondering, could I get my phone back?  Thanks.

Posted by: Maureen at March 01, 2008 08:31 AM (UG2Ot)

47 I was working of AuH2O in 64.  This was the first real over the top attack ad.

You bet.  And you know who was responsible for it?  LBJ's communications/media director, that's who. 

And who might that be, you ask?

Bill Moyers.

That's right.  Bill f'n Moyers. 

Bill "all Republicans are evil" Moyers.

He was a partisan hack then, and a partisan hack now. But he can get on PBS and whine about GOP "incivility", which he has done, with a straight face and not get called on it.

Posted by: OregonMuse at March 01, 2008 08:55 AM (zTfCf)


During the election, McCain should take that exact commercial, cut off the parts with Hillary, and just have it end with the phone ringing and the words, "I'm John McCain and I approve this message."

The funniest part, if he's running against Hillary, would be her accusing him of "The Politics of Fear".

As long as you can ignore that this election has become so tragic and horrible and ugly and that the result will probably end America as we know it, it's actually pretty darn funny.

Oh, but if McCain does  run it, make sure there are no racist subliminable messages.

High comedy indeed, with a capital "HIGH".

Posted by: Veeshir at March 01, 2008 09:18 AM (ThMnZ)


What the? When I hover my mouse over the link, it shows a link to Althous, but when I click it, I end up at google.


That's the link.

Posted by: Veeshir at March 01, 2008 09:19 AM (ThMnZ)

50 Well Hillary's add worked for me.  But then I'm not living an appeasement fantasy world.  I've done my homework regarding the Islamic institution of Jihad and I've given some thought to the consequences of the spread of WMD technologies, the technological and cost trends which lead to lowing barriers to acquisition of WMDs (what some call the "democratization" of WMD terror).   Barry Neville Obamachamberlin is too Islamicist friendly for my taste so I'd expect that Hillary and I will be voting for McCain this coming November.

BTW: I saw LBJ's election eve daisy chain campaign ad.  It was effective ... if I were around then to vote I would have had second thoughts about voting for Goldwater.  

Posted by: Mike O'Malley at March 01, 2008 09:22 AM (Y0ncT)

51 Sir, the Norks have shot down one of our planes, what should we do?

Which candidate would you trust to respond correctly?

1. Clinton: Send Albright to Korea immediately. And call Lebron James, for an autographed basketball.

2. Obama: Okay, were we doing something bad to them? Like monitoring their nuclear sites or finding out where they keep the Japanese hostages? Tell them we are Changing.

3. McCain: Nuke them from orbit. Trust me, the captured pilot won't mind as much as you'd think he would.

Posted by: Harun at March 01, 2008 09:28 AM (zyADa)

52 McCain should make mincemeat out of these two "babes in the woods" Dems.

This is no time to go wobbly, America.

Posted by: Stormy70 at March 01, 2008 09:32 AM (Y+o71)


Yes, it is fun watching the Clinton death-spiral.  I wish Tuesday night would hurry up and get here.  I can't wait to hear what the experts decide to tell us.

Posted by: Dogstar at March 01, 2008 09:52 AM (FgxdU)

54 It would be a LOT more fun following the Clinton death spiral if I were happier about the field she's leaving behind. It harshes my schadenfreude.

Posted by: S. Weasel at March 01, 2008 10:35 AM (9jA8/)

55 "It harshes my schadenfreude."

Heh.  Thanks, S. Weasel, for giving me a good set of words to explain what I've been feeling.

Posted by: Z as in Jersey at March 01, 2008 11:07 AM (RiRew)

56 Jack Nicholson finds nothing sexier in the morning than saluting Hillary in uniform. Sieg heil, Frau Komandant! Hubba-hubba-hubba speaks for itself. Geez, he looks AWFUL! Who're you gonna trust? Who you gonna call? Ghost Busters might help because these pickled fascists reincarnate more than evolve. So if this final Islamic messiah mullah is to be Obama, where would Hillary fit into her socialist religion's prophecy schtick? She's doomed, no where over that utopian rainbow, out done by her own doing.

Posted by: maverick muse at March 01, 2008 11:12 AM (LYKFp)

57 Are you sure that this isn't a case of candidate error, Dave? What are you doing, Dave? What are you doing? Daisy... Daisy...

Posted by: HAL at March 01, 2008 11:13 AM (VSAVV)


Bumperstickers -

 HILLARY: Relax - she knows how to pick up the Red Phone! 

 OBAMA : Don't worry - he'll chat with our enemies on the Red Phone! 

 McCAIN: Rest assured - our enemies won't want that fucker to ring!

Posted by: sherlock at March 01, 2008 11:52 AM (ojW85)

59 It harshes my schadenfreude.

As fun as it is to watch the Democratic party twist in a frenzy of hypocrisy, identity politics gone horribly wrong, and power hunger turned inward, it doesn't matter who wins: we lose.

Posted by: Christopher Taylor at March 01, 2008 11:56 AM (3+3kx)

60 Has anybody else heard Hillary's "texas" accent she adopted while compagning today?

Posted by: Duhgee at March 01, 2008 12:11 PM (O7jFX)

61 Should be: It hashes my schadenfreude.

Posted by: ricpic at March 01, 2008 12:36 PM (o03rx)

62 Is that horrible Texan, can't think of her name, who said of Bush Senior, "He cain't hep it if he wuz bawn with a silva foot in his mouf," still alive? Or is she pushing up Texas bluebonnets? No shortage of horrible Dem fems. A gift that keeps on giving.

Posted by: ricpic at March 01, 2008 12:42 PM (o03rx)

63 Ja, you say you luff me tonight, but vill you luff me in the mornink?

Posted by: Schaden Freud at March 01, 2008 01:47 PM (cHcxA)

64 I want a hardass like Patton, Halsey, or LeMay to answer that phone, but they're all dead, so I'd settle for Dick Cheney and be quite happy.  This current three possibilities...not so much.

Posted by: Purple Avenger at March 01, 2008 02:16 PM (5hXBq)

65 Is that horrible Texan, can't think of her name, who said of Bush Senior, "He cain't hep it if he wuz bawn with a silva foot in his mouf," still alive?

That was former Texas governor Anne "Ma" Richards.  I think she passed on not too long ago.  Funny thing about Ms. Richards, she got her pasty white butt handed to her by George W. Bush (and his campaign manager Karl Rove) in the next election. She disses the dad and she gets popped in the face by the son. Yeah. Thinking about that makes me giggle like a schoolgirl.

Posted by: OregonMuse at March 01, 2008 02:24 PM (zTfCf)

66 About Ann, Molly Ivens couldn't praise her enough because of her downhome recovering alcoholic persona. Funny how she blasted "shrub" for the same things. It was always interesting to see the spittle out of one side of Molly's mouth while she was servicing Ann for the same things.
 Yeah, I know... shouldn't speak ill of the dead. Or brain dead.

Oh, regarding the 3am ad... my wife giggled when she saw it. She wishes the kids were asleep at 3am right now. Between colds and teething, the sleep deprivation is really starting to get to us.

Posted by: ken at March 01, 2008 03:04 PM (75YP3)

67 Gov. Ann Richards - 1933- 2006.  RIP.

Posted by: Mikey NTH at March 01, 2008 03:11 PM (TUWci)

68 Not that I agreed with Gov. Richards, but stll - RIP.

Posted by: Mikey NTH at March 01, 2008 04:19 PM (TUWci)

69 Hope she was buried with a silver spoon in her mouth.  

Posted by: Lokki at March 01, 2008 05:25 PM (gE65f)

70 About Ann, Molly Ivens couldn't praise her enough because of her downhome recovering alcoholic persona. Funny how she blasted "shrub" for the same things.

Yeah, I always thought that was why that Ivins  hated W. so much, namely, because when given the opportunity, Texas voters rejected her friend Richards for Bush. And she just couldn't abide that.

RIP to Richards and Ivins both. Ivins had this "downhome" personal, too, only in her case, it was so irritatingly and obviously fake.  I don't miss it.

Posted by: OregonMuse at March 01, 2008 06:31 PM (zTfCf)


Ok - one thought........Bill Clinton actually looked at Hillarious and went - "dude! she's hot."

This is troubling on so many levels that ordinary analysis isn't useful - why would any man (or woman) be so lonely that sleeping with her is considered a good thing?

And, if the red phone rings - are we obligated to answer it?


Posted by: Murph at March 01, 2008 11:58 PM (g9a4p)

72 Subliminal message? See http://althouse.blogspot.com/2008/03/why-are-letters-nig-on-childs-pajamas.html How about 3 seconds into the commercial where it shows a little blonde girl with stars on her jamies and stripes on the pillow.

Posted by: devildog666 at March 02, 2008 04:08 AM (VI3cx)

73 It's just like Hillary is. The lights are on but nobody's home.

Posted by: rick diehl at March 02, 2008 07:22 AM (U8gb+)


Funny that they use 3am in their commercial--as I recall from The Exorcism of Emily Rose, 3 am is the witching hour, a perversion of the time of the crucifixion which was 3pm (Hebrew Standard Time).

Good movie by the way; I may go check out that German version, Requiem. 

Posted by: Xenu at March 02, 2008 01:40 PM (o/1nd)

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