March 31, 2012

Sat. Night Chess Thread [OregonMuse]
— Open Blogger

I was happily surprised when last week's chess thread brought out some pretty good comments, and not all of them derisive. Accordingly, this is an attempt to gauge whether that was a one-off novelty, or is indicative or a larger demand. I mean, we're all nerds, right? At least I suspect most of us morons are, in one way or another, so let's get our nerd on.

I'll going to get the ball rolling by start by embarrassing the shit out of moron commenter GolfBoy by pimping his chess book that he apparently wrote by accident. In last Sunday's book thread, he let the cat out of the bag:


With the recent postings about Bobby Fischer's games, I feel moved (so to speak) to confess that I am another Moron Author. A few years ago I accidentally wrote the book "Practical Chess Exercises." It is a training resource for serious tournament players. In defiance of all reason and good taste, it has been a top selling chess book on Amazon for nearly 5 years. Please - I beg you - stop buying it! Every time I discover a royalty check in my mailbox I cringe with shame and humiliation.

So, take his advice: Don't buy the book. And if you don't want to buy his book, this is the link you don't want to click on:

http://tinyurl.com/6nyth7n

It's a tactical exercise book and we all could probably improve our tactical skills. I know I could.

And for your Sat. nite craziness, here's a wild, wild game between Judit 'Big Mama' Polgar and Nigel 'Slap My Ass And Call Me Sally' Short:

I need to acquaint myself with these sorts of modern classics. I started out in chess a few years before the Fischer era and so I really only am familiar with the old classics, such as Alekhine-Yates, Botvinnik-Capablanca, Morphy-pretty much everyone else, etc. I don't know too much about what's gone on (at least on the chess theory level) since about 1975 or so.

Any chess tips for this thread may be sent to me at

OregonMuse
and then the at sign
followed by yahoo
and then dot
com

Having a weekly chess thread may turn out to be a complete flop. The demand might be low. Also, the Head Ewok may not want his smart military blog turned into a forum for the pursuit of sundry personal hobby horses.

We'll see.

Posted by: Open Blogger at 03:09 PM | Comments (310)
Post contains 411 words, total size 2 kb.

1 This is smash mouth blogging!

Posted by: CoolCzech at March 31, 2012 03:21 PM (niZvt)

2 I like chess

Posted by: Ron at March 31, 2012 03:22 PM (uhPd1)

3 Uh oh, Chick Chess?!

I hope my wife is not in some Chick Chess Youtube vid!

Posted by: logprof at March 31, 2012 03:22 PM (ykSKg)

4 What was the star trek chess game?

Posted by: Ron at March 31, 2012 03:22 PM (uhPd1)

5 There goes the neighborhood.

Posted by: Andy at March 31, 2012 03:22 PM (XG+Mn)

6 Now that we milked this thread for all the conversation it's worth, any ideas where Olbermann is goingto wor next? My suggestion: he can work the little TV monitors at gas stations. You can listen to him rant while you pump!

Posted by: CoolCzech at March 31, 2012 03:23 PM (niZvt)

7 Saturday Night Chess Thread, holy shit! Release the kraken!

Posted by: Max Power at March 31, 2012 03:24 PM (q177U)

8 Legends were born that day.

Posted by: Max Power at March 31, 2012 03:24 PM (q177U)

9 Ron, don't light that cigarette, man!

Posted by: Max Power at March 31, 2012 03:24 PM (q177U)

10 Pawns are cool

Posted by: Ron at March 31, 2012 03:24 PM (uhPd1)

11 5 minutes to Human Achievement Hour in the Eastern time zone.  N'oublie pas.

Posted by: longerthoughts at March 31, 2012 03:25 PM (CVVLU)

12 already lit

Posted by: Ron at March 31, 2012 03:25 PM (uhPd1)

13 I feel compelled to buy one of these:

http://youtu.be/GhGByPJii5Q

Posted by: logprof at March 31, 2012 03:25 PM (ykSKg)

14 Any morons ever get pawned? Queened?

Posted by: CoolCzech at March 31, 2012 03:25 PM (niZvt)

15
I only play with the queens.

Posted by: Ru Paul at March 31, 2012 03:25 PM (TkGkA)

16 Pawns can go in any direction...except up or down, unless they are Vulcan War Pawns. In-which case they go up and one over to account for gravitational redshifting.

Posted by: Max Power at March 31, 2012 03:27 PM (q177U)

17 Yo Kentucky Wildcats, your coach is only good at cheating --do you really think this run won't be vacated in 2 years?

Posted by: logprof at March 31, 2012 03:28 PM (ykSKg)

18 @17: Queens like me go up and down nonstop.

Posted by: Barney Frank at March 31, 2012 03:28 PM (niZvt)

19 Klingon Queens are the only chess piece that can are allowed to eat the faces of the other set pieces. Plus they can mate with any race.

Posted by: Max Power at March 31, 2012 03:29 PM (q177U)

20 Oh shit, boss alert. Have to "work" more.

Posted by: Max Power at March 31, 2012 03:30 PM (q177U)

21 Didn't they ban cleavage?  Why yes, yes they did http://is.gd/oSHT5D


Posted by: toby928© at March 31, 2012 03:30 PM (GTbGH)

22

You know who's a Grand Wizard at Chess?  

My Boy, Barack. 

He's got a Rook with a Titanium Ramrod for a Spine.

Posted by: Joe Biden at March 31, 2012 03:30 PM (zn0Us)

23 Oh, good.  I kept thinking, as I was watching the game, if we can't have a Final Four thread, perhaps at least we can get a chess thread going.  Be still my heart . . .

Posted by: Peaches at March 31, 2012 03:30 PM (w407e)

24 22 Didn't they ban cleavage? Why yes, yes they did http://is.gd/oSHT5D Posted by: toby928© at March 31, 2012 08:30 PM (GTbGH) Too much cleavage made the male players choke their bishops.

Posted by: CoolCzech at March 31, 2012 03:31 PM (niZvt)

25 You played with her chest?

Posted by: fonzy at March 31, 2012 03:31 PM (GTbGH)

26 http://youtu.be/kmaJ4G6qhM8


What a relief, no hits for my wife on Youtube.

Posted by: logprof at March 31, 2012 03:32 PM (ykSKg)

27 @24: Hi peaches! Up for a game of chest?

Posted by: CoolCzech at March 31, 2012 03:32 PM (niZvt)

28 I much prefer Tak.

Posted by: Kvothe son of Arliden at March 31, 2012 03:33 PM (zn0Us)

29 Everybody Jump the Queen!

Posted by: garrett at March 31, 2012 03:33 PM (zn0Us)

30 Are there crossbows in chess, or longbows?

Posted by: sulla at March 31, 2012 03:34 PM (RBiQ2)

31 " Kvothe" holy shit is that from the King Killer Chronicles?

Posted by: Max Power at March 31, 2012 03:34 PM (q177U)

32 Wouldn't heavily breast-laden chicks be better at playing naked Twister?

Posted by: CoolCzech at March 31, 2012 03:34 PM (niZvt)

33 Let the wookie win.

Posted by: C3P0 at March 31, 2012 03:34 PM (GTbGH)

34

zzzzz

 

Nigel Short?

 

One of the most boring chess players ever.

Posted by: Truman North at March 31, 2012 03:35 PM (I2LwF)

35 Obama is a stuttering clusterf*ck of a miserable failure.

Posted by: steevy at March 31, 2012 03:36 PM (7W3wI)

36 Chess strategies.  Did the shit just get real?

Posted by: Vic at March 31, 2012 03:36 PM (YdQQY)

37 So,you think Obama is any good at chess?

Posted by: steevy at March 31, 2012 03:36 PM (7W3wI)

38 BTW we saw War Horse today. Damn good movie. Ludicrous plot, but wonderfully filmed and the story really tugs at your heart.

Posted by: CoolCzech at March 31, 2012 03:37 PM (niZvt)

39 When Obama plays chess against the computer, he allows himself to take moves back until he wins.

Posted by: Truman North at March 31, 2012 03:38 PM (I2LwF)

40 Judging by the company he keeps he's not even good at chest.

Posted by: Max Power at March 31, 2012 03:38 PM (q177U)

41 "40 When Obama plays chess against the computer, he allows himself to take moves back until he wins. Posted by: Truman North at March 31, 2012 08:38 PM (I2LwF) How long will that take?

Posted by: CoolCzech at March 31, 2012 03:39 PM (niZvt)

42 39 BTW we saw War Horse today. Damn good movie. Ludicrous plot, but wonderfully filmed and the story really tugs at your heart.

Posted by: CoolCzech at March 31, 2012 08:37 PM (niZvt)


Sounds hot.

Posted by: Sarah Jessica Parker at March 31, 2012 03:39 PM (ykSKg)

43 Where's the cheerleaders?

Posted by: Hydrocarbon Liberation Front at March 31, 2012 03:40 PM (NVu2l)

44 What about that classic match of Kronstein vs. Anderson? (Pep, it's a movie reference...)

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at March 31, 2012 03:41 PM (Af3Wg)

45 Where's the cheerleaders?

We don't talk to chess players, d'uh!

Posted by: Teh Cheerleaders (and their boobehs) at March 31, 2012 03:41 PM (w407e)

46 44 Where's the cheerleaders? Posted by: Hydrocarbon Liberation Front at March 31, 2012 08:40 PM (NVu2l) Chess has cheerleaders?

Posted by: CoolCzech at March 31, 2012 03:41 PM (niZvt)

47 My late Brother was a USCF Master and whipped my ass all the time.
Didn't know how much I'd learned from him until I played at a nightclub that featured chess and backgammon. I kicked everybody's ass.

Posted by: Beto at March 31, 2012 03:41 PM (lpWVn)

48 Speaking of Chests..... anyone seen my feet?

Posted by: MacNCheese McCain at March 31, 2012 03:41 PM (jucos)

49 31 longbows

Posted by: Beto at March 31, 2012 03:42 PM (lpWVn)

50 But it's not my heart I want tugged.

Posted by: Pooter Hound at March 31, 2012 03:43 PM (0TdUk)

51 "Chess has cheerleaders?" No. Making it totally un-thread worthy IMHO..

Posted by: StuckOnStupid at March 31, 2012 03:43 PM (R5yLq)

52 40 When Obama plays chess against the computer, he allows himself to take moves back until he wins.
Posted by: Truman North at March 31, 2012 08:38 PM (I2LwF)

How long will that take?

Posted by: CoolCzech at March 31, 2012 08:39


It's still ongoing

Posted by: Beto at March 31, 2012 03:44 PM (lpWVn)

53 Well, NFL Cheerleading Team Chest Tournaments would probably make for good viewing, in 3D...

Posted by: CoolCzech at March 31, 2012 03:44 PM (niZvt)

54
Boff that bishop, baby!  Yeah!

Posted by: Austin Karpov Powers at March 31, 2012 03:45 PM (LEcV+)

55 Okay, I just cracked myself up thinking about Sheriff Joe trying to play chess.  While dodging bullets.  In a coffee shop that doesn't exist.  In a town he lies about visiting.  While making a list for his next trip to Home Depot.

Posted by: Peaches at March 31, 2012 03:46 PM (w407e)

56 Chess Piece Face

http://youtu.be/fPWAmeqxiyY

Posted by: They Might Be Giants at March 31, 2012 03:46 PM (ykSKg)

57 I have to re post a couple stories that I posted in the last thread.Need to get you all as angry as I am.

Posted by: steevy at March 31, 2012 03:46 PM (7W3wI)

58 When Obama plays chess against the computer, he allows himself to take moves back until he wins.
Posted by: Truman North at March 31, 2012 08:38 PM (I2LwF)

How long will that take?


For the rest of his single term of office, I hope.

Posted by: Retread at March 31, 2012 03:46 PM (joSBv)

59 "Well, NFL Cheerleading Team Chest Tournaments would probably make for good viewing, in 3D..." How about we kill all these government grants that are paying this worthless scientists to have shrimp run on treadmills and continue the global warming scare and have all that scientific innovation focused on something worthwhile. Feel-O-Vision

Posted by: StuckOnStupid at March 31, 2012 03:47 PM (R5yLq)

60

BTW we saw War Horse today. Damn good movie. Ludicrous plot, but wonderfully filmed and the story really tugs at your heart.

 

Posted by: CoolCzech at March 31, 2012 08:37 PM (niZvt)

 

 

So, chick flick?

Posted by: ErikW at March 31, 2012 03:47 PM (bBgWH)

61 Chess has cheerleaders?

Posted by: CoolCzech at March 31, 2012 08:41 PM (niZvt)

 

They should.

 

Why can't we have a women's beach  volleyball thread. That is sport and cheerleader in one.

Posted by: Hydrocarbon Liberation Front at March 31, 2012 03:47 PM (NVu2l)

62 Let the Wookkie win.

Posted by: C3PO at March 31, 2012 03:47 PM (xwuyd)

63 “We won’t win the race for new jobs and new businesses and middle-class security if we cling to this same old, worn-out, tired ‘you’re on your own’ economics that the other side is peddling,” Obama said. “It was tried in the decades before the Great Depression. It didn’t work then. It was tried in the last decade. It didn’t work,” he said. “You know, the idea you would keep on doing the same thing over and over again, even though it’s been proven not to work. That’s a sign of madness.”

Posted by: steevy at March 31, 2012 03:48 PM (7W3wI)

64 61 BTW we saw War Horse today. Damn good movie. Ludicrous plot, but wonderfully filmed and the story really tugs at your heart. Posted by: CoolCzech at March 31, 2012 08:37 PM (niZvt) So, chick flick? Posted by: ErikW at March 31, 2012 08:47 PM (bBgWH) Pretty much. Yeah.

Posted by: CoolCzech at March 31, 2012 03:48 PM (niZvt)

65 "Let the Wookkie win." She's already first "lady", what more does she want?

Posted by: StuckOnStupid at March 31, 2012 03:48 PM (R5yLq)

66 Okay, steevy, I facepalmed at that.  He's such a maroon . . .

Posted by: Peaches at March 31, 2012 03:49 PM (w407e)

67 (CNSNews.com) - The Obama administration says it will not prosecute a Saudi Arabian national who the administration claimed in congressional testimony entered the United States on a student visa and then was arrested after threatening to blow up the White House. On March 6, top officials from the Department of Homeland Security (DHS) told the House Homeland Security Subcommittee on Border and Maritime Security in both written and verbal testimony that DHS had arrested a Saudi national who was “threatening to blow up the White House and the Saudi Arabian Cultural Mission to the United States.”

Posted by: steevy at March 31, 2012 03:49 PM (7W3wI)

68 Your all a bunch of geek retards, but I love ya's. Some more retard-drunk musings:



186 Hello retards, I'm late to the party and it probably has been mentioned already but I have been told on numerous occasions throughout my life that eggs, bacon, beer, wine, hobo tracking, heavy metal, masturbation and playing with fire works are dangerous to my health.

Well. I'm 41yrs old now, I can still see and I have all my digits to hit the bunk while shitfaced. My doctor has recently told me that I am "the picture of health" my tinnistus is a littlte flared up but I solve that problem by simply turning up the volume on my favorite Slayer album. I eat beef at least twice a week and smoke a 1/2 pack a day. I'm 30lbs overweight and have never felt better. I work 55 hours a week, play golf on the weekends and enjoy friends and family every weekend when possible. I have a beautiful wife and have never been happier...THAT is the difference between a liberal and a conservative. I will will live my life the way I see fit not the way some cheese dick hippy douch bag thinks is best for every one else. I work for my own insurance and I will get my moneys worth come the end of my rope.

Fuck off loser, douch, lefty, assholes.

Posted by: dananjcon at March 31, 2012 03:49 PM (bX0ZS)

69 Yes, I saw that steevy.  Half of me gets really mad, and the other half just laughs at his utter nincompoopery.

Posted by: Truman North at March 31, 2012 03:50 PM (I2LwF)

70 I'm turning on extra lights "green" motherfuckers!!!!

Posted by: steevy at March 31, 2012 03:50 PM (7W3wI)

71 Cheerleaders have chesses

Posted by: cherry at March 31, 2012 03:51 PM (OhYCU)

72 Whoever wins tonight, please beat John Cheatapari Monday!

Posted by: logprof at March 31, 2012 03:51 PM (ykSKg)

73 Why can't we have a women's beach volleyball thread. That is sport and cheerleader in one. Posted by: Hydrocarbon Liberation Front at March 31, 2012 08:47 PM (NVu2l) Why can't we have competitive moronette pole dancing? I'll even let them use my pole, IYKWIM.

Posted by: CoolCzech at March 31, 2012 03:51 PM (niZvt)

74 [When Obama plays chess against the computer, he allows himself to take moves back until he wins. [/i]

Sounds about right.

Posted by: OregonMuse at March 31, 2012 03:51 PM (2bAog)

75 I learnt just enough about chess to "hold the centre". Other than that, the game doesn't interest me enough.

Posted by: Boulder Toilet Hobo at March 31, 2012 03:52 PM (QTHTd)

76 Oh hell yeah, taste my porch lights, bitchez!!

Posted by: Max Power at March 31, 2012 03:52 PM (q177U)

77 Started playing chess again when I got my iPad a year ago. It's too convenient just pushing pieces around with my finger. I even play in bed when I can't sleep. I've played a lot of 5-minute games in one year but unfortunately, my rating just hovers.

Posted by: MaxMBJ at March 31, 2012 03:53 PM (deaac)

78

Pretty much. Yeah.

 

Posted by: CoolCzech at March 31, 2012 08:48 PM (niZvt)

 

I was helping a buddy lay a tile floor earlier and he told me about a movie he watched  last night with his wife, "Salmon Fishing in Yemen."

 

He said it was actually pretty cool but was a total chick flick. But cool nonetheless.

Posted by: ErikW at March 31, 2012 03:54 PM (bBgWH)

79 In the London Olympics the womens beach volleyball are wearing shorts and tee shirts.First time instead of bikinis.We're lucky they aren't wearing burkhas I guess.

Posted by: steevy at March 31, 2012 03:54 PM (7W3wI)

80 If I played chess with Special Agent Ziva David, I'd let her ride my knight...

Posted by: CoolCzech at March 31, 2012 03:54 PM (niZvt)

81 The earth is saved by lefty logic via a mental giant on Twitter : This earth hour drove every person in town to the local restraunts, to use their power instead of their own

Posted by: Retread at March 31, 2012 03:54 PM (joSBv)

82 Obviously, Polgar distracted Short Nigel with her breasts.  You could see her flash him in the video at 1:26.

Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at March 31, 2012 03:54 PM (X3lox)

83 I find checkers overwellming.
Spelling too.

Posted by: dananjcon at March 31, 2012 03:55 PM (bX0ZS)

84

steevy @ 80

 

Well, this time.  There will come a day when we will have to decide just who we are.  Bikinis, yeah!  Burkas, nyet!

Posted by: Reader C.J. Burch writes...... at March 31, 2012 03:56 PM (sJTmU)

85 Where the hell am I?

This IS Saturday night, right?

Posted by: the 19th century at March 31, 2012 03:56 PM (piMMO)

86 Czech, if it's shaped more like a knight than a bishop, you've been fapping too much

Posted by: Boulder Toilet Hobo at March 31, 2012 03:56 PM (QTHTd)

87 83 Obviously, Polgar distracted Short Nigel with her breasts. You could see her flash him in the video at 1:26. Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at March 31, 2012 08:54 PM (X3lox) She does have cute chest pieces...

Posted by: CoolCzech at March 31, 2012 03:56 PM (niZvt)

88 I don't have the patience for chess. Maybe if there was blitzkrieg variant where you get to punch your opponent in the junk  every few rounds.

Posted by: Hydrocarbon Liberation Front at March 31, 2012 03:56 PM (NVu2l)

89 Oh, yeah, I have to make a note to myself to light the place all up at 8:30.  Lest I forget . . .

Posted by: Peaches at March 31, 2012 03:57 PM (w407e)

90 Next week: Parcheesi!

Posted by: the 19th century at March 31, 2012 03:58 PM (piMMO)

91 damn sock!

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at March 31, 2012 03:58 PM (piMMO)

92 Is tonight earf hour night??

Posted by: dananjcon at March 31, 2012 03:58 PM (bX0ZS)

93 A chess thread but no basketball thread?

Gay.

Posted by: Dr Spank at March 31, 2012 03:58 PM (Sh42X)

94 "I don't have the patience for chess. Maybe if there was blitzkrieg variant where you get to punch your opponent in thejunk every few rounds." You mean that isn't already part of the normal rules of chess? Huh.. ok, well that explains why they threw me out of chess club then - damn.

Posted by: StuckOnStupid at March 31, 2012 03:58 PM (R5yLq)

95 Chessboxing is a hybrid sport that combines chess with boxing in alternating rounds.  You may now continue.

Posted by: @SOEarpiece at March 31, 2012 03:58 PM (GTbGH)

96 If I played chess with Special Agent Ziva David, I'd let her ride my knight...

Posted by: CoolCzech at March 31, 2012 08:54 PM (niZvt)

 

Touch my horse. TOUCH IT!!!  I'd probably get escorted out by security. These folks don't seem like party animals.

Posted by: Hydrocarbon Liberation Front at March 31, 2012 03:59 PM (NVu2l)

97 I don't have the patience for chess. Maybe if there was blitzkrieg variant where you get to punch your opponent in the junk every few rounds.

Posted by: Hydrocarbon Liberation Front at March 31, 2012 08:56 PM (NVu2l)

Blitz chess is pretty close.  Play a 3-minute game and it's nothing but quick fun.

Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at March 31, 2012 03:59 PM (X3lox)

98 Hey, I proposed it a while back and I'm still up for it: Moron Pogo night.

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at March 31, 2012 03:59 PM (piMMO)

99 Your move.

Posted by: Death at March 31, 2012 03:59 PM (xwuyd)

100 Saturday night 19th century style?

I suppose it's no longer in vogue to go down the Irish pub and start a turf war with some Italian immigrants. Well, I suppose I could do the pub thing at least

Posted by: Boulder Toilet Hobo at March 31, 2012 04:00 PM (QTHTd)

101 I don't have the patience for chess. Maybe if there
was blitzkrieg variant where you get to punch your opponent in the junk
every few rounds.


That's Donkey Chess.

Posted by: Cicero at March 31, 2012 04:00 PM (xwuyd)

102 It's fun that you can find TERRIBLE looking moves in well researched openings that actually work quite well in practice. For example. 1 e4 c6 2 d4 d5 3 Nc3 ... What could be more common? Now, black automatically plays d5xe4... 3 ... b5?! Mua ha ha ha. A crazy idea by Gurgendize from 1968. Played it against Tal and got killed because, after all, Tal's a killer. But the move works! If e4xd5 then you chase the knight with 4 ... b4 and black's game is ugly but sound. The b4 pawn looks stupid but it supresses the normal c4 move in similar positions. Plus, queen side castling is scary for both players so both castle king side and you get positions unusual for the caro-kann which is fine for black since he wanted unusual when he played 3 ... b5. If white plays 4 a3 then the b5 pawn still hangs out there supressing c4. I've had great luck with this in speed games.

Posted by: Comrade Arthur at March 31, 2012 04:01 PM (d9lOz)

103 In the London Olympics the womens beach volleyball are wearing shorts and tee shirts.First time instead of bikinis.We're lucky they aren't wearing burkhas I guess.

Posted by: steevy at March 31, 2012 08:54 PM (7W3wI)



I love women with tight bodies in tight clothers ... but for some reason I could never stand the pieces of scotch tape that the beach volleyball players wore.  Don't know why, but they never struck me as sexy.  Not even with the hot chicks.

Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at March 31, 2012 04:02 PM (X3lox)

104 You mean that isn't already part of the normal rules of chess? Huh.. ok, well that explains why they threw me out of chess club then - damn.

Posted by: StuckOnStupid at March 31, 2012 08:58 PM (R5yLq)

 

I advanced a plan that would provide an electric shock if the move took longer than 30 seconds, but no one wanted to play.

Posted by: Hydrocarbon Liberation Front at March 31, 2012 04:02 PM (NVu2l)

105 This was a smart military blog
now it's kitties and chess

next it will be a comfortable slippers blog

Posted by: Jones in CO at March 31, 2012 04:02 PM (8sCoq)

106 @103: is that Checkers?

Posted by: CoolCzech at March 31, 2012 04:02 PM (niZvt)

107 Black f5 was just asking for trouble.

Posted by: davidt at March 31, 2012 04:02 PM (axc/z)

108 I prefer ChessJousting

Posted by: cherry at March 31, 2012 04:04 PM (OhYCU)

109 Blitz chess is pretty close. Play a 3-minute game and it's nothing but quick fun.

Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at March 31, 2012 08:59 PM (X3lox)

 

That might actually be cool. Much more like war.

Posted by: Hydrocarbon Liberation Front at March 31, 2012 04:04 PM (NVu2l)

110 The Knight always wins

Posted by: cherry at March 31, 2012 04:05 PM (OhYCU)

111 We should totally liveblog a chess matzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

Posted by: Andy at March 31, 2012 04:05 PM (XG+Mn)

112 Sure ... black loses and you people have to run a tape of it over and over calling his moves "stupid".

Posted by: Jesse Jackson at March 31, 2012 04:05 PM (X3lox)

113 Robert Reich likes to play Midget Chess, in a leather g-string.

Posted by: CoolCzech at March 31, 2012 04:07 PM (niZvt)

114 The simple fact is that team Obama has passed ONE UN resolution on Iran. They got only 12 votes of support in that ONE resolution (12/15 votes for a failure rate of 20% on Iran votes at the Security Council). The Bush team got FIVE resolutions on Iran (THREE with Sanctions). In those FIVE resolutions, team Bush lost just 2 total votes (73/75 votes for a failure rate of 2.6% on Iran votes at the Security Council). Additionally, team Obama hasn’t produced a UN resolution on Iran since June 9, 2010 (almost 2 years ago). One only needs to look at the growing list of countries that have said they will ignore our request to stop buying Iranian oil to understand that Obama’s diplomatic requests are being ignored. I see India, Russia, China, South Africa and many European countries publicly saying they will buy Iranian oil and ignore the U.S. requests. While team Obama thinks the world is united, the world is enjoying the comfort of a weaker U.S. government that no longer pressures them to take action. It is disheartening but the world is less united since Obama has been in office. Yet Team Obama says: “Iran is weaker and more isolated today precisely because of actions that President Obama has taken. Through sustained diplomacy, the president forged unprecedented international consensus to pressure Iran — far greater consensus and pressure than the previous Republican administration achieved through its go-it-alone, my-way-or-the highway approach. President Obama secured the toughest unilateral and multilateral sanctions on Iran to date, and they’re having a devastating impact on its economy. The Iranian nuclear program has been slowed, and Iran’s leaders have signaled their willingness to resume talks, in which the United States will seek to ensure Iran lives up to its international obligations. At the same time, the president has firmly and consistently said that all options are on the table, including military action, to prevent the Iranian regime from obtaining a nuclear weapon.”

Posted by: steevy at March 31, 2012 04:07 PM (7W3wI)

115

In the London Olympics the womens beach volleyball are wearing shorts and tee shirts.First time instead of bikinis.We're lucky they aren't wearing burkhas I guess.

 

Posted by: steevy at March 31, 2012 08:54 PM (7W3wI)

 

 

The golf club I work at is the home course for a few high school teams and a college team.

 

One girls high school team has two Muslim girls who dress in in full length robes and head covering, no face covering (I don't know if that's technically a burka.)

 

Anywho, they wear the team's collared polo shirt over the robes. It looks uncomfortable.

 

That must play hell on their swing.

Posted by: ErikW at March 31, 2012 04:07 PM (bBgWH)

116 I'm gonna take your white Queen, bitches!!!

Posted by: Black King at March 31, 2012 04:08 PM (OhYCU)

117 @115: you're stepping on my Midget Chess gag, syeevy!

Posted by: CoolCzech at March 31, 2012 04:09 PM (niZvt)

118 I go both ways

Posted by: Rook at March 31, 2012 04:09 PM (OhYCU)

119 Chess sets are now only sold in Black and White Hispanic

Posted by: MSNBC at March 31, 2012 04:10 PM (OhYCU)

120 116 I think the burkha is actually the head covering and the one over the body is something else.Chidori?

Posted by: steevy at March 31, 2012 04:10 PM (7W3wI)

121 I am getting several emails a day now.

Didn't hit the jackpot last night?

Friend --

There's another drawing happening at midnight: We're picking the last guest for Dinner with Barack.
You have a much better shot at winning this.
Donate $3 or whatever you can before midnight and be automatically entered:
Remember: Every donation doesn't just give you a chance to get dinner with the President. It also provides the resources that will help open all those field offices and hire all those organizers.
Thanks,

Obama for America

Posted by: Niedermeyer's Dead Horse at March 31, 2012 04:11 PM (piMMO)

122 next it will be a comfortable slippers blog

Posted by: Jones in CO at March 31, 2012 09:02 PM (8sCoq)

For sale: Two year old Snuggie. Never been washed. Twenty Harlequin books read.  Bids start at 20.00.


Posted by: dananjcon at March 31, 2012 04:11 PM (bX0ZS)

123 118 Sorry.

Posted by: steevy at March 31, 2012 04:11 PM (7W3wI)

124 Yes on the chess thread!  Don't think I can contribute much to the great debates over which grandmaster was better than that one, but I do like to play.  Got a great onyx set in Ensenada for $14 bucks way back in the day.  Checkmate, bitch!

Posted by: NC Ref at March 31, 2012 04:11 PM (/izg2)

125 @121: I thought a chidori was a long Mexican pastry covered with cinnamon and sugar...

Posted by: CoolCzech at March 31, 2012 04:11 PM (niZvt)

126 126 WTH do I know?I'm a white xenophobe racist.

Posted by: steevy at March 31, 2012 04:13 PM (7W3wI)

127 For some reason I have the Playboy channels tonight.They actually have a Spanish one.Is that necessary?What do you need to listen too,critical dialog?

Posted by: steevy at March 31, 2012 04:14 PM (7W3wI)

128 For sale: Two year old Snuggie. Never been washed. Twenty Harlequin books read. Bids start at 20.00.

Posted by: dananjcon at March 31, 2012 09:11 PM (bX0ZS)

 

No way. I just got the old lady a tiger striped hoody-footy.

Posted by: Hydrocarbon Liberation Front at March 31, 2012 04:14 PM (NVu2l)

129 Best computer  chess game?  National Lampoon's Chess Maniac.

Posted by: Vic at March 31, 2012 04:15 PM (YdQQY)

130

116 I think the burkha is actually the head covering and the one over the body is something else.Chidori?

 

Posted by: steevy at March 31, 2012 09:10 PM (7W3wI)

 

Not sure. I looked up hijab and that was a head covering that exposed the entire face.

 

I looked up chidori and got anime pron! I'll, um, have to change search settings.

Posted by: ErikW at March 31, 2012 04:15 PM (bBgWH)

131 126 WTH do I know?I'm a white xenophobe racist.

Posted by: steevy at March 31, 2012 09:13 PM (7W3wI)

 

Whatever you do, if an old aquaintence asks you to saw a shotgun barrel short, say no.

Posted by: Hydrocarbon Liberation Front at March 31, 2012 04:15 PM (NVu2l)

132 The golf club I work at is the home course for a few high school teams and a college team.

One girls high school team has two Muslim girls who dress in in full length robes and head covering, no face covering (I don't know if that's technically a burka.)




ErikW you doing any coaching yet?  Seems like a great opportunity right there.  And I ref some soccer games for a school that has a Muslim girl who wears some pretty serious head wraps.  Doesn't cover the face but to me it's a significant danger to getting strangled if she falls and someone steps on it, would rather she didn't play with it.  But if I address it, I'll be the racist fuck who had to make an issue of it.

Posted by: NC Ref at March 31, 2012 04:16 PM (/izg2)

133 I am watching the new Critical Race Theory channel.  They're building high speed trains right now.

Posted by: cherry at March 31, 2012 04:16 PM (OhYCU)

134 @128: What could be hawter than a Whita Latina purring out, "Yo quiero su burrito!"

Posted by: CoolCzech at March 31, 2012 04:16 PM (niZvt)

135 I thought a chidori was a long Mexican pastry covered with cinnamon and sugar...

Posted by: CoolCzech at March 31, 2012 09:11 PM (niZvt)



There's such a thing as Mexican pastry?  They must hide that with the Chinese breakfasts ...

Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at March 31, 2012 04:16 PM (X3lox)

136 135 Well yeah,you could watch either depending what has the better show on.Who cares if it is in Spanish?

Posted by: steevy at March 31, 2012 04:18 PM (7W3wI)

137 Having a weekly chess thread may turn out to be a complete flop.

I'm thinking .. yes.

Posted by: nostradamus' 401k at March 31, 2012 04:18 PM (GTbGH)

138 135 Does she look like Sotamayor?


Speaking of nerds. MY 2nd grade son went on a field trip to the planetarium. The geeky guy doing the show asked them if they recognized the space ship. Of course, mine did and which version. My older sons are horrified. I laughed my head off.

Posted by: dagny at March 31, 2012 04:18 PM (CMM9V)

139 127 126 WTH do I know?I'm a white xenophobe racist.

Posted by: steevy at March 31, 2012 09:13 PM (7W3wI)

*

I'm afraid of chess masters, midgets, guido's, tranny's,  mimes, clowns,  liberals, and brown people..and ACE.


Posted by: dananjcon at March 31, 2012 04:18 PM (bX0ZS)

140 Kings and Queens have now been outlawed.  We now offer Gay Queens and Tranny Kings. 

Posted by: chess institute at March 31, 2012 04:19 PM (OhYCU)

141 Spanish Playboy shows a lot more facial expressions.

Posted by: nostradamus' 401k at March 31, 2012 04:19 PM (GTbGH)

142 In the London Olympics the womens beach volleyball are wearing shorts and tee shirts.First time instead of bikinis.We're lucky they aren't wearing burkhas I guess.

Posted by: steevy at March 31, 2012 08:54 PM (7W3wI)




And the television ratings plummet.  Unexpectedly!

Posted by: NC Ref at March 31, 2012 04:20 PM (/izg2)

143 I think its called a chador.

My house is as lit up as Ted Kennedy at a Chappaquiddick house party.

Posted by: helofixer at March 31, 2012 04:21 PM (4KHln)

144 I am watching the new Critical Race Theory channel. They're building high speed trains right now.

Posted by: cherry at March 31, 2012 09:16 PM (OhYCU)

 

I could support a high speed rail that went from an ICE holding facilty to the border. These libs just do not know how to market stuff.

Posted by: Hydrocarbon Liberation Front at March 31, 2012 04:21 PM (NVu2l)

145 Posted by: steevy at March 31, 2012 09:07 PM (7W3wI)

**

Yeesh Steevy, are you ok?' 

Posted by: dananjcon at March 31, 2012 04:21 PM (bX0ZS)

146 144 Yeah,that sounds right.

Posted by: steevy at March 31, 2012 04:22 PM (7W3wI)

147 142 Spanish Playboy shows a lot more facial expressions. Posted by: nostradamus' 401k at March 31, 2012 09:19 PM (GTbGH) Wait. The chiquitas have faces?

Posted by: CoolCzech at March 31, 2012 04:22 PM (niZvt)

148 The mexican doughnut thing is a churro.

Posted by: dagny at March 31, 2012 04:22 PM (CMM9V)

149 146 Fine,just hating Obama and producing massive quantities of stmoach acid.For 3 years +.

Posted by: steevy at March 31, 2012 04:23 PM (7W3wI)

150 Any go players around, or are you all just chess dweebs?

Posted by: Alex at March 31, 2012 04:23 PM (tlK1P)

151 Looks like England is a muslim country now. What a shame.

Posted by: dagny at March 31, 2012 04:24 PM (CMM9V)

152 I once went headfirst through a vagina. Should I worry?

Posted by: cherry at March 31, 2012 04:24 PM (OhYCU)

153

My kids are enjoying the Nickelodeon Kid's Choice Awards.

 

Moochelle came on.  Some shitty award.  Just as they wanted me to come in and help them with something.

 

Took me a minute to gather myself up to do it.

Posted by: Truman North at March 31, 2012 04:24 PM (I2LwF)

154 Wait. The chiquitas have faces?

Posted by: CoolCzech at March 31, 2012 09:22 PM (niZvt)

*

My wife is Spanish (Chilean) and..its true.

She is why I am in fighting shape!

Posted by: dananjcon at March 31, 2012 04:26 PM (bX0ZS)

155 155 She's also going to appear on an episode of Biggest Loser.

Posted by: steevy at March 31, 2012 04:26 PM (7W3wI)

156 @150: Prilosec works great on stomach acid, but can give you gas and the runs. Something to keep in mind the next time you play naked Twister...

Posted by: CoolCzech at March 31, 2012 04:26 PM (niZvt)

157 She's also going to appear on an episode of Biggest Loser.

Tentatively scheduled for November 7th.

Posted by: nostradamus' 401k at March 31, 2012 04:27 PM (GTbGH)

158 For some reason I have the Playboy channels tonight.They actually have a Spanish one.Is that necessary?What do you need to listen too,critical dialog?

What's even better is porn that was obviously shot in English but dubbed in Spanish.  Can you imagine the person whose job it is to do that?

Posted by: Alex at March 31, 2012 04:27 PM (tlK1P)

159 158 @150: Prilosec works great on stomach acid, but can give you gas and the runs. Something to keep in mind the next time you play naked Twister...

Posted by: CoolCzech at March 31, 2012 09:26 PM (niZvt)

*

Eeew.

Posted by: dananjcon at March 31, 2012 04:27 PM (bX0ZS)

160 154 I once went headfirst through a vagina. Should I worry? Posted by: cherry at March 31, 2012 09:24 PM (OhYCU) We all have. It's called "birth."

Posted by: CoolCzech at March 31, 2012 04:27 PM (niZvt)

161 162 Unless you were C sectioned or a breach.

Posted by: steevy at March 31, 2012 04:29 PM (7W3wI)

162 Yeah, that, "May cause anal leaking," bit was hard to overcome.

Posted by: Olestra Marketing Team at March 31, 2012 04:29 PM (axc/z)

163 I think in chess you're not allowed to move your king into check . . . that's tantamount to quitting.

Posted by: Boulder Toilet Hobo at March 31, 2012 04:29 PM (QTHTd)

164 164 MadTV had a funny sketch on that,"now with 30% less anal leakage."

Posted by: steevy at March 31, 2012 04:30 PM (7W3wI)

165 My book titled "How to win at Spoons" was a bust.

Posted by: Ronster at March 31, 2012 04:31 PM (T1nDt)

166 164 Yeah, that, "May cause anal leaking," bit was hard to overcome.

Posted by: Olestra Marketing Team at March 31, 2012 09:29 PM (axc/z)

*

eeeeeewe!


Posted by: dananjcon at March 31, 2012 04:32 PM (bX0ZS)

167 The sphincter doesn't make a perfect seal folks,like it or not there will be some leakage.

Posted by: steevy at March 31, 2012 04:33 PM (7W3wI)

168

Shit.

 

NC Ref, I wrote a lengthy reply, hit the wrong button and the whole fucking thing blew up so in short, not coaching yet, waiting for the right time and muslim religious garb has no place on the pitch for obvious safety reasons.

Dammit.

Posted by: ErikW at March 31, 2012 04:34 PM (bBgWH)

169 Is chess a metaphor and if I suggested it was like the game of Risk, would I be mixing metaphors or should I instead be mixing beer and scotch - tape is produced by 3M which stands for Minnesota, Minining and ? Speaking of Minnesota Genmar is a company owned by Irwin Jacobs which used to own Glastron Boats and speaking of boats, Genmar used to own Lund which made a good Bass Boat that housed good styrofoam coolers some called chest coolers .... But not chess coolers. So I there I ain't got nothing, which is a double negative, which suggests I still have something here.

Posted by: Jornolist at March 31, 2012 04:35 PM (9WjNg)

170 A frog's ass is watertight.

Posted by: dick cheese at March 31, 2012 04:35 PM (GTbGH)

171 The sphincter doesn't make a perfect seal folks,like it or not there will be some leakage.

Tell me about it

Posted by: raykon's mom at March 31, 2012 04:37 PM (QTHTd)

172 This thread is driving me insane!

Posted by: Paul Morphy at March 31, 2012 04:37 PM (BB0/w)

173 Journolist, have you been taking lessons from Larry King's newspaper columns?

Posted by: Truman North at March 31, 2012 04:37 PM (I2LwF)

174 174 This thread is driving me insane! Posted by: Paul Morphy at March 31, 2012 09:37 PM (BB0/w) Me too!

Posted by: Bobby Fischer at March 31, 2012 04:37 PM (BB0/w)

175 Unless you were C sectioned or a breach.

Posted by: steevy at March 31, 2012 09:29 PM (7W3wI)

 

Or unless you sprang fully formed from the brow of Zeus.

Posted by: Hydrocarbon Liberation Front at March 31, 2012 04:37 PM (NVu2l)

176 Sorry - We just won a baseball game and I took everyone out for pizza and beer for the adults and the beer for the adults was like a repeating symphonic refrain.

Posted by: Jornolist at March 31, 2012 04:38 PM (9WjNg)

177 I'm trapped under ice...

Posted by: dananjcon at March 31, 2012 04:38 PM (bX0ZS)

178 I don't even want to know how a chess thread got around to sphincters and anal leakage.

Posted by: tammy al thor at March 31, 2012 04:39 PM (SsG4J)

179 169 The sphincter doesn't make a perfect seal folks,like it or not there will be some leakage. Posted by: steevy at March 31, 2012 09:33 PM (7W3wI) Show of hands - who is on the "Like it" side of the equation?

Posted by: RomneyBot since 2007 at March 31, 2012 04:39 PM (BB0/w)

180 Oh, Journo, I was hoping that was intentional because it was hilarious

Posted by: Truman North at March 31, 2012 04:39 PM (I2LwF)

181 What was the star trek chess game?

I believe it was called 'chess'.

Posted by: OregonMuse at March 31, 2012 04:39 PM (EQr+U)

182 I just picked up a black queen. But enough about my personal life...

Posted by: RomneyBot since 2007 at March 31, 2012 04:40 PM (BB0/w)

183 181 LOL.

Posted by: steevy at March 31, 2012 04:40 PM (7W3wI)

184 The sphincter doesn't make a perfect seal folks,like it or not there will be some leakage. Posted by: steevy at March 31, 2012 09:33 PM (7W3wI) ---------------------------------------------------- WORD!

Posted by: Guy What Wipes For 15 Minutes and Never Feels "Clean" at March 31, 2012 04:40 PM (jucos)

185 183 Three level chess I think?

Posted by: steevy at March 31, 2012 04:41 PM (7W3wI)

186 As to beer, It is quite easy to taste the differncen between a pitcher of Bud Light and one of Heff. About hurled when drinking the Bud Light so ordered a refresh of Stella.

Posted by: Jornolist at March 31, 2012 04:41 PM (9WjNg)

187 Star Trek was 3-Dimensional Chess

Posted by: dagny at March 31, 2012 04:41 PM (CMM9V)

188 181 169 The sphincter doesn't make a perfect seal folks,like it or not there will be some leakage. Posted by: steevy at March 31, 2012 09:33 PM (7W3wI) Show of hands - who is on the "Like it" side of the equation? Posted by: RomneyBot since 2007 at March 31, 2012 09:39 PM (BB0/w) On second thought I don't want to see your hands...

Posted by: RomneyBot since 2007 at March 31, 2012 04:42 PM (BB0/w)

189 178 Sorry - We just won a baseball game and I took everyone out for pizza and beer for the adults and the beer for the adults was like a repeating symphonic refrain.

Posted by: Jornolist at March 31, 2012 09:38 PM (9WjNg)+

*

I'm sure you paid  your carbon foot print tax of 52% of yearly earnings.

Posted by: dananjcon at March 31, 2012 04:42 PM (bX0ZS)

190 OK, here goes...!.E4

Posted by: blogforce one at March 31, 2012 04:43 PM (7cXfH)

191

 I don't even want to know how a chess thread got around to sphincters and anal leakage.


 

Posted by: tammy al thor at March 31, 2012 09:39 PM (SsG4J)

 

 

I must have some sort of involuntary selective blindness because I didn't even notice.

 

Or didn't WANT to notice, take your pick.

Posted by: ErikW at March 31, 2012 04:43 PM (bBgWH)

192 "A frog's ass is watertight." Argghh! Science! Run away.. Run away.. lol

Posted by: StuckOnStupid at March 31, 2012 04:43 PM (R5yLq)

193 We also had a visiting contingent from Taiwan in the group, don't even ask, and they loved beer and more beer.

Posted by: Jornolist at March 31, 2012 04:44 PM (9WjNg)

194 192 OK, here goes...!.E4 Posted by: blogforce one at March 31, 2012 09:43 PM (7cXfH) 1...J26! Mate in 23!

Posted by: RomneyBot since 2007 at March 31, 2012 04:44 PM (BB0/w)

195 The sphincter doesn't make a perfect seal folks,like it or not there will be some leakage.

Posted by: steevy at March 31, 2012 09:33 PM (7W3wI)


That's what allah gave you a left hand for, you idiot infidel.

Posted by: Civilized Muslim at March 31, 2012 04:44 PM (X3lox)

196 164 Started it.LOL.

Posted by: steevy at March 31, 2012 04:44 PM (7W3wI)

197 Is chess a metaphor and if I suggested it was like the game of Risk, would I be mixing metaphors or should I instead be mixing beer and scotch - tape is produced by 3M which stands for Minnesota, Minining and ? Speaking of Minnesota Genmar is a company owned by Irwin Jacobs which used to own Glastron Boats and speaking of boats, Genmar used to own Lund which made a good Bass Boat that housed good styrofoam coolers some called chest coolers .... But not chess coolers. So I there I ain't got nothing, which is a double negative, which suggests I still have something here. Posted by: Jornolist at March 31, 2012 09:35 PM (9WjNg) --------------------------------------------- That would be Minnesota Mining and Manufacturing..... which they actually do most of in Texas nowadays. Also, Irwin Jacobs (Irv the Liquidator) was a hell of a guy. I used to serve legal process and came across Irv a lot. Super nice. MN (still) is home to A LOT of fortune 500 companies even after the states DFL leaders try to chase them all out.

Posted by: Truck Monkey at March 31, 2012 04:45 PM (jucos)

198 81 If I played chess with Special Agent Ziva David...

I'd be too busy fangirling and probably knock the board over.

As for the *featured* game - that's a problem I have when I play.  I tend to lock up my bishops and rooks.  Grrrrrrrr~

Posted by: Where's my pressie? at March 31, 2012 04:45 PM (X5Hwz)

199 Posted by: ErikW at March 31, 2012 09:43 PM (bBgWH)

What can I say.....something about a frog's ass being water tight caught my attention.  

Posted by: tammy al thor at March 31, 2012 04:46 PM (SsG4J)

200 Hey pressie, how are you?

Posted by: tammy al thor at March 31, 2012 04:46 PM (SsG4J)

201 94 "A frog's ass is watertight."

Argghh! Science! Run away.. Run away..

lol

Posted by: StuckOnStupid at March 31, 2012 09:43 PM (R5yLq)

*

No...a ducks ass is watertight,  frogs ass is just for show.


Posted by: dananjcon at March 31, 2012 04:47 PM (bX0ZS)

202 This thread is driving me insane! Posted by: Paul Morphy

A circle of shoes will protect you.

Posted by: dick cheese at March 31, 2012 04:47 PM (GTbGH)

203

"Klingon Queens are the only chess piece that can are allowed to eat the faces of the other set pieces. Plus they can mate with any race."

I see what you did there. 

Posted by: Michelle Obama at March 31, 2012 04:48 PM (QjSgY)

204 Hi, tammy - I'm good, just baked some pretzels and enjoying them with seltzer (no beer until Sunday after next - boo...)!  How's it?

Posted by: Where's my pressie? at March 31, 2012 04:48 PM (X5Hwz)

205 Irwin Jacobs made many a man a boat load of money. Most businessmen get served legal papers.

Posted by: Jornolist at March 31, 2012 04:48 PM (9WjNg)

206 If you ever have the choice between the lamb and the pigeon, you choose the pigeon, because it has the nicer pussy.

Posted by: A hilarious janitor at my old college at March 31, 2012 04:48 PM (I2LwF)

207 Dammit.

Posted by: ErikW at March 31, 2012 09:34 PM (bBgWH)



Word.  You wouldn't believe the fkn reports I'm writing now.  My game today sucked, Mens over 40, six yellow cards, three red cards, all on the same damn team.  Other team....one caution that I had to manufacture because it was just so unbalanced.  ncj's daughter should NOT take notes.

Posted by: NC Ref at March 31, 2012 04:48 PM (/izg2)

208 What are the preferred methods for teaching kids chess? I only let a few pieces on the board at a time.

Posted by: Jean at March 31, 2012 04:48 PM (elbGQ)

209 Ione Skye was the hot actress from the 80'2 90's who turned out lesbian wasn't she?The one married to one of the Beastie Boys?

Posted by: steevy at March 31, 2012 04:50 PM (7W3wI)

210 Why do you want water in your ass? And who is an ass-water tester?

Posted by: cherry at March 31, 2012 04:50 PM (OhYCU)

211

Jean:  king and pawns, then add rooks and castling.  Then advanced pawn moves.  Then bishops, then knights, then queen.

 

They taught us the basics in 1st grade and I was able to teach the kids in the neighborhood.

Posted by: A hilarious janitor at my old college at March 31, 2012 04:50 PM (I2LwF)

212 204 This thread is driving me insane! Posted by: Paul Morphy A circle of shoes will protect you. Posted by: dick cheese at March 31, 2012 09:47 PM (GTbGH) I met a Duke and a Count at the opera last night!

Posted by: Paul Morphy at March 31, 2012 04:50 PM (BB0/w)

213 pressie, sounds like you and Thor gave up the same thing!

All is well. Got laid off, and am probably going to move to Arkansas for good here within a month or so.

Posted by: tammy al thor at March 31, 2012 04:50 PM (SsG4J)

214 "No...a ducks ass is watertight, frogs ass is just for show." Aha.. so, then logically, if she weighs as much as a duck she must be made of wood, and therefore a witch. Who are you who are so wise in the ways of science?

Posted by: StuckOnStupid at March 31, 2012 04:51 PM (R5yLq)

215 180 I don't even want to know how a chess thread got around to sphincters and anal leakage. Posted by: tammy al thor at March 31, 2012 09:39 PM (SsG4J) Suffice it to say, I played a role in it. Speaking of formerly watertight anuses, that giant sucking sound you hear must be Barney Frank doing squat thrust exercises...

Posted by: CoolCzech at March 31, 2012 04:51 PM (niZvt)

216 A hilarious janitor at my old college sock off

Posted by: Truman North at March 31, 2012 04:51 PM (I2LwF)

217 Irwin Jacobs made many a man a boat load of money. Most businessmen get served legal papers. Posted by: Jornolist at March 31, 2012 09:48 PM (9WjNg) ------------------------------------------------------ I would see him at least 5 or 6 times a year. He got to know me by name. He was an innovator along the likes of Curt Carlson and Guy Schoenecker. Great businessmen.

Posted by: Truck Monkey at March 31, 2012 04:51 PM (jucos)

218

"Any go players around, or are you all just chess dweebs?"

cutthroat Parcheesi dweeb here.

Posted by: Michelle Obama at March 31, 2012 04:52 PM (QjSgY)

219 A chess player and a parcheesi player went into a bar...zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

Posted by: Paul Morphy at March 31, 2012 04:53 PM (BB0/w)

220 Suffice it to say, I played a role in it.

I'm shocked, Cool Czech,  shocked I tell you! 

Posted by: tammy al thor at March 31, 2012 04:53 PM (SsG4J)

221

"Minnesota Minining and" Manufacturing.

 

It's a little-known fact ... 

Posted by: Arbalest at March 31, 2012 04:54 PM (VZK6Z)

222 sock fail

Posted by: 66chevelle at March 31, 2012 04:54 PM (QjSgY)

223 I met William F. Buckley in Minnesota, the same place I had dinner with Eugene McCarthy about 50 yards where Hubert humphrey rolled in on Marine One years earlier.

Posted by: Jornolist at March 31, 2012 04:54 PM (9WjNg)

224 Part-time, I pretend to be a chess troll.  I make a few moves and then piss all over myself before my queen is toppled.

Posted by: cherry at March 31, 2012 04:54 PM (OhYCU)

225 "Suffice it to say, I played a role in it. I'm shocked, Cool Czech, shocked I tell you! " Ya..nobody saw that coming.. lol

Posted by: StuckOnStupid at March 31, 2012 04:54 PM (R5yLq)

226 Here is a 3 minute game I just played. Scotch, ECO C45 I am white. 1 e4,e5 2 Nf3,Nc6 3 d4,exd4 4 Nxd4,Bc5 5 Nxc6, Qf6 6 Qd2,dxc6 7 Nc3,Ne7 8 Na4,bd6 9 Bd3, O-O 10 O-O, Be6 11 Qe3,Ng6 12 f4,b5 13 Nc3,Qe7 14 kh1,Bc5 15 Qe2,Nh8 16 f5,Bd7 17 Qg4,f6 18 a4!,b4?? 19 Bc4+,Nf7 20 Bh6, Flag He was prolly cooked anyway

Posted by: blogforce one at March 31, 2012 04:54 PM (7cXfH)

227 What are the preferred methods for teaching kids chess? I only let a few pieces on the board at a time.



No matter who wins or loses, everybody should get a trophy just for participating.

Posted by: King Barry the Fair at March 31, 2012 04:54 PM (/izg2)

228 Aw man, tammy - sorry to hear that.  Do you have something lined up in Arkansas?

Posted by: Where's my pressie? at March 31, 2012 04:54 PM (X5Hwz)

229 GolfBoy should fix the kindle version; it's killing the reviews! Bunch of 1-stars because of formatting issues on kindle.

Posted by: Reality at March 31, 2012 04:54 PM (dptRY)

230

What can I say.....something about a frog's ass being water tight caught my attention.


 

Posted by: tammy al thor at March 31, 2012 09:46 PM (SsG4J)

 

 

LOL!

Posted by: ErikW at March 31, 2012 04:55 PM (bBgWH)

231 Little-known fact:  The wrestler Triple H was not named after Hubert Humphrey.

Posted by: Truman North at March 31, 2012 04:55 PM (I2LwF)

232 Kind of geeky eh?

Posted by: blogforce one at March 31, 2012 04:56 PM (7cXfH)

233 228 Here is a 3 minute game I just played. Scotch, ECO C45 I am white. Racist

Posted by: Paul Morphy at March 31, 2012 04:56 PM (BB0/w)

234

A chess player and a parcheesi player went into a bar...zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

 

Speaking of bars...remember backgammon bars?

Posted by: 66chevelle at March 31, 2012 04:56 PM (QjSgY)

235 I'm curious about the automated chat bot that seems to inject random nonsense every 5 or 6 posts. Did that come with the blog software or is it something Ace paid extra for?

Posted by: StuckOnStupid at March 31, 2012 04:56 PM (R5yLq)

236 Chess? I need some Hearts of Iron 3 tips.

Posted by: Waterhouse at March 31, 2012 04:56 PM (zX1/n)

237 I met William F. Buckley in Minnesota, the same place I had dinner with Eugene McCarthy about 50 yards where Hubert humphrey rolled in on Marine One years earlier. Posted by: Jornolist at March 31, 2012 09:54 PM (9WjNg) ----------------------------------------------------- My dads company provided all of the cars for Hubert Humphries funeral.

Posted by: Truck Monkey at March 31, 2012 04:57 PM (jucos)

238 Little known fact, DJ Leary from Minnesota invented tape delay in talk radio.

Posted by: Jornolist at March 31, 2012 04:58 PM (9WjNg)

239 Ahhh - I could talk en passant pawn captures for hours, but that's a whole other zugzwang!

Posted by: Paul Morphy at March 31, 2012 04:58 PM (BB0/w)

240 Aw man, tammy - sorry to hear that. Do you have something lined up in Arkansas?

Oh, no need at all to be sorry, I haven't been able to work since June 2010 any way, and no money coming in on my end...am going to just go back and hang at our place awhile. My mama lives next door and she's getting a bit forgetful, so it will ease my mind from worrying about her.

Thor will retire at the end of next year and move back then.

Posted by: tammy al thor at March 31, 2012 04:59 PM (SsG4J)

241 I know, I know It was called the Zimmerman attaCK

Posted by: blogforce one at March 31, 2012 04:59 PM (7cXfH)

242 237 I'm curious about the automated chat bot that seems to inject random nonsense every 5 or 6 posts. Did that come with the blog software or is it something Ace paid extra for?

Posted by: StuckOnStupid at March 31, 2012 09:56 PM (R5yLq)

*

No, That would be me.

I'm retarded...and always one beer away from total...


Posted by: dananjcon at March 31, 2012 04:59 PM (bX0ZS)

243 lol SOS

Posted by: Truman North at March 31, 2012 04:59 PM (I2LwF)

244 "Ahhh - I could talk en passant pawn captures for hours" Wow.. that's.. well, that's actually rather scary.

Posted by: StuckOnStupid at March 31, 2012 05:00 PM (R5yLq)

245

Posted by: NC Ref at March 31, 2012 09:48 PM (/izg2)

 

 

Jeebus, were they just a bunch of assholes?

Posted by: ErikW at March 31, 2012 05:00 PM (bBgWH)

246 Also, the Head Ewok may not want his smart military blog turned into a forum for the pursuit of sundry personal hobby horses. Would my obsession with creamed corn wrestling double-jointed cheerleaders count as "sundry personal hobby horses"? I'm thinking that just MIGHT pass muster.

Posted by: IllTemperedCur at March 31, 2012 05:00 PM (FIE/L)

247 You should ask my wife about little known chat.

Posted by: Jornolist at March 31, 2012 05:00 PM (9WjNg)

248

Anyone know how to play Connect Four?

Barack and I wanted to play, but we can't find the instructions.

Posted by: Joe Biden at March 31, 2012 05:00 PM (zn0Us)

249 More chess talk, please. If anybody likes foolhardy and reckless, I'm big on the King's Gambit and--when I'm feeling especially suicidal--the Sokolsky Gambit. Because that's how I roll.

Posted by: troyriser at March 31, 2012 05:02 PM (YCeSE)

250 Would my obsession with creamed corn wrestling double-jointed cheerleaders count as "sundry personal hobby horses"? I'm thinking that just MIGHT pass muster.

Posted by: IllTemperedCur at March 31, 2012 10:00 PM (FIE/L)

*

Cut...Jib..E-mail blast..


Posted by: dananjcon at March 31, 2012 05:02 PM (bX0ZS)

251 Ahhh - I could talk en passant pawn captures for hours"

Wow.. that's.. well, that's actually rather scary.


Not at all....... it sounds intelligent, and therefore verrah verrah sexy.

Posted by: tammy al thor at March 31, 2012 05:02 PM (SsG4J)

252 "No, That would be me.I'm retarded...and always one beer away from total... " Coming this fall, to Fox. Dananjcon, staring in "A Beer To Far".

Posted by: StuckOnStupid at March 31, 2012 05:02 PM (R5yLq)

253

"My kids are enjoying the Nickelodeon Kid's Choice Awards.

Moochelle came on. Some shitty award..."

 

Yeah, every time she goes on vacation, she's got to do four or five magazines and TV shows for poll number maintenance.  One of these days her profligacy is going to land her on the cover of ForbesLife. 

Posted by: 66chevelle at March 31, 2012 05:02 PM (QjSgY)

254 OK - as to chess, Knight's Rosette is a basic strat.

Posted by: Jornolist at March 31, 2012 05:03 PM (9WjNg)

255 "Not at all....... it sounds intelligent, and therefore verrah verrah sexy." Aha.. so, that's were I've been going wrong all these years. So, need to pickup a book on chess jargon. Got it.. lol

Posted by: StuckOnStupid at March 31, 2012 05:03 PM (R5yLq)

256

I'm glad things are coming together, Tammy.

Posted by: ErikW at March 31, 2012 05:03 PM (bBgWH)

257 Wow, that was a hell of a game! It's not often that you see the tide turn that suddenly and completely. I haven't played much in recent years. My brain has been fried by age and booze, but these kinds of threads just might get me interested in chess again. I definitely prefer chess threads to basketball threads. Even football, though I know I will be denounced for that. I won't denounce myself, however.

Posted by: rickl supports SMOD/Supervolcano 2012 at March 31, 2012 05:04 PM (sdi6R)

258 Anybody seen my crayons?

Posted by: Smokin' Joe Biden at March 31, 2012 05:04 PM (vbh31)

259 Posted by: StuckOnStupid at March 31, 2012 10:03 PM (R5yLq)

Not necessarily...you done caught yourself a little Hummingbird!

If you don't play chess, you probably don't need to pick up a girl who thinks chess jargon is teh sexy, right???

Posted by: tammy al thor at March 31, 2012 05:05 PM (SsG4J)

260 "I definitely prefer chess threads to basketball threads. Even football, though I know I will be denounced for that. I won't denounce myself, however." Ah, take two denouncements out of petty cash. We've got plenty. I get what you mean about basketball, never found it much fun to play or watch. As to Football, more of a college fan myself. Haven't followed pro ball in years.

Posted by: StuckOnStupid at March 31, 2012 05:06 PM (R5yLq)

261 The white pieces acted stupidly.

Posted by: King Barack at March 31, 2012 05:07 PM (dptRY)

262 SOS - check out Hoyle's Rules. You can brush up on any game there. Too bad playing President isn't covered there for Obama.

Posted by: Jornolist at March 31, 2012 05:07 PM (9WjNg)

263 Thank you, Erik! The vertigo is even going away, slowly but surely. Can't complain. Got my man, that's really about all I need!!!

Posted by: tammy al thor at March 31, 2012 05:07 PM (SsG4J)

264 253 Ahhh - I could talk en passant pawn captures for hours" Wow.. that's.. well, that's actually rather scary. Not at all....... it sounds intelligent, and therefore verrah verrah sexy. Posted by: tammy al thor at March 31, 2012 10:02 PM (SsG4J) And don't even get me started on castling queenside! Cognac, anyone?

Posted by: Paul Morphy at March 31, 2012 05:07 PM (BB0/w)

265 Coming this fall, to Fox. Dananjcon, staring in "A Beer To Far".

Posted by: StuckOnStupid at March 31, 2012 10:02 PM (R5yLq)


Vol-Beat..what??+

Still counting.

I haven't caught your hole(censco)story, but i assume you are still working. A victory for all of us. God bless, God speed.

DRINK!
 

Posted by: dananjcon at March 31, 2012 05:08 PM (bX0ZS)

266 "Not necessarily...you done caught yourself a little Hummingbird! " Lol.. true. She got a little huffy with me though when I suggested a drug test. "If you don't play chess, you probably don't need to pick up a girl who thinks chess jargon is teh sexy, right???" Well in the interest of full disclosure actually I did play chess, years ago when my grandfather was still alive. We had a weekly game for years, but I haven't played since he passed. I just like messing with chess geeks. Not quite as much fun as going to a Star Trek convention and tossing in the "A Star destroyer would destroy the Enterprise in a real fight" grenade. Lol Yes.. I am a bad, bad man. I denounce myself.

Posted by: StuckOnStupid at March 31, 2012 05:08 PM (R5yLq)

267 Yes.  For reals.  Almost every time I showed a card I told the dumbasses that they made me do it.  Bitches now makin' me work for free too, writing up reports on their complete assholery; it's really hard to not carry a grudge.

Posted by: NC Ref at March 31, 2012 05:09 PM (/izg2)

268 Cognac, anyone?

Posted by: Paul Morphy at March 31, 2012 10:07 PM (BB0/w)


Shall I bring it to you in the French Maid outfit, or the Saucy Wench garb?

Posted by: tammy al thor at March 31, 2012 05:09 PM (SsG4J)

269

Seriously, guys.  We need some help. 

For Instance, there are Red Checkers and Black Checkers but no White Checkers. 

So. Who goes first?

Barack says it's the Black Checkers, but you know how he can be about this kind of thing.

I think the Red Checkers go first because Indians are red, not the 7-11 kind, and they were the first Americans.

Am I right?

 

Posted by: Joe Biden at March 31, 2012 05:10 PM (zn0Us)

270 It's good that you'll be able to take care of your mom, and I hope you and your husband can enjoy retirement.

Posted by: Where's my pressie? at March 31, 2012 05:10 PM (X5Hwz)

271 (censco)=Conseco..I think. He's a funny mofo.

Posted by: dananjcon at March 31, 2012 05:10 PM (bX0ZS)

272 "I haven't caught your hole(censco)story, but i assume you are still working. A victory for all of us. God bless, God speed." Yup.. still gainfully employed and loving life.

Posted by: StuckOnStupid at March 31, 2012 05:10 PM (R5yLq)

273 I hope you and your husband can enjoy retirement.

Hah, I will enjoy retirement, and Thor will worry incessantly about it. That's just how we roll. Opposites really do attract!

Posted by: tammy al thor at March 31, 2012 05:12 PM (SsG4J)

274 Hey, did somebody break the nonsense bot?

Posted by: StuckOnStupid at March 31, 2012 05:12 PM (R5yLq)

275 Yup.. still gainfully employed and loving life.

Posted by: StuckOnStupid at March 31, 2012 10:10 PM (R5yLq)


**

Its amazing how right thinking people always seem to be RIGHT.

Hello retards, I'm late to the party and it probably has been mentioned
already but I have been told on numerous occasions throughout my life
that eggs, bacon, beer, wine, hobo tracking, heavy metal, masturbation
and playing with fire works are dangerous to my health.

Well.
I'm 41yrs old now, I can still see and I have all my digits to hit the
bunk while shit-faced. My doctor has recently told me that I am "the
picture of health" my tinnistus is a littlte flared up but I solve that
problem by simply turning up the volume on my favorite Slayer album. I
eat beef at least twice a week and smoke a 1/2 pack a day. I'm 30lbs
overweight and have never felt better. I work 55 hours a week, play golf
on the weekends and enjoy friends and family every weekend when
possible. I have a beautiful wife and have never been happier...THAT is
the difference between a liberal and a conservative. I will will live my
life the way I see fit not the way some cheese dick hippy douch bag
thinks is best for every one else. I work for my own insurance and I
will get my moneys worth come the end of my rope.

Fuck off loser, douch, lefty, assholes.

Posted by: dananjcon at March 31, 2012 08:49 PM (bX0ZS)

Posted by: dananjcon at March 31, 2012 05:15 PM (bX0ZS)

276 SLAYER!

Posted by: garrett at March 31, 2012 05:18 PM (zn0Us)

277 Eh..suck it bitch!

Posted by: dananjcon at March 31, 2012 05:18 PM (bX0ZS)

278 I never knew chess players could be such rock stars!

Posted by: model_1066 at March 31, 2012 05:18 PM (PWwbk)

279 270 Cognac, anyone? Posted by: Paul Morphy at March 31, 2012 10:07 PM (BB0/w) Shall I bring it to you in the French Maid outfit, or the Saucy Wench garb? Posted by: tammy al thor at March 31, 2012 10:09 PM (SsG4J) Things haven't been this exciting since I mixed up the Sicilian Najdorf with the Sicilian Dragon - and it turned out it was an accelerated Dragon!!!! (That slays them down at my club) Now, anyone seen my pipe and slippers?

Posted by: Paul Morphy at March 31, 2012 05:19 PM (BB0/w)

280 I just like messing with chess geeks. Not quite as much fun as going to a Star Trek convention and tossing in the "A Star destroyer would destroy the Enterprise in a real fight" grenade. Lol

Nah, ever since the incredible cross sections books, that issue was settled.  Now trekkies just cry into their romulan ale while warsies sob at the thought of how low the franchise has sunk.

Posted by: Alex at March 31, 2012 05:19 PM (tlK1P)

281 20 Klingon Queens are the only chess piece that can are allowed to eat the faces of the other set pieces. Plus they can mate with any race.

Posted by: Max Power at March 31, 2012 08:29 PM (q177U)



All this gossip about Moochelle has got to stop....

Posted by: model_1066 at March 31, 2012 05:19 PM (PWwbk)

282 Hot chicks DO play chess! Here is what happened I thrust my white bishop into her fertile territory that I had to occupy. once I squeezed it in, she squealed with delight! she knew she was in the drivers seat! She the fiachettoed her beautiful bishops with pawns on top, then presented her naked queen for the taking. we had another drink, and then I mated her in the most unusual way... It was an enveloping manouvre that completely left her back rank exposed! she rode me and with her Knightie on her shoulders and kept saying i love the horsie!

Posted by: blogforce one at March 31, 2012 05:20 PM (7cXfH)

283 Shall I bring it to you in the French Maid outfit, or the Saucy Wench garb?

A buddy of mine jokes that he should tell his wife to wear "That slutty June Cleaver outfit I like so much".

Posted by: Alex at March 31, 2012 05:21 PM (tlK1P)

284 Shall I bring it to you in the French Maid outfit, or the Saucy Wench garb? Posted by: tammy al thor at March 31, 2012 10:09 PM (SsG4J) Oh, and if this is really a woman - French Maid If a man then Saucy Wench, please...

Posted by: Paul Morphy at March 31, 2012 05:22 PM (BB0/w)

285 275 Hey, did somebody break the nonsense bot? Posted by: StuckOnStupid at March 31, 2012 10:12 PM (R5yLq) No, I'm still here.

Posted by: Paul Morphy at March 31, 2012 05:23 PM (BB0/w)

286

Posted by: Jornolist at March 31, 2012 09:54 PM (9WjNg)

Did you partake of the herb with him?  Never told anyone this before, but the Contract With America came out of an epic session we had. 

Posted by: Newt at March 31, 2012 05:23 PM (QjSgY)

287 I think the Jews are behind this thread...

Posted by: Dead Bobby Fischer at March 31, 2012 05:25 PM (BB0/w)

288 I started laughing so hard at #180 that I had to quit drinking for fear I would waste this wonderful Ruthless Rye!  Out loud laughing to #195.

Posted by: Grandma Mimi at March 31, 2012 05:30 PM (roHFn)

289 289 I think the Jews are behind this thread... Posted by: Dead Bobby Fischer at March 31, 2012 10:25 PM (BB0/w) Heil! I need a drink.

Posted by: Alexander Alekhine at March 31, 2012 05:34 PM (BB0/w)

290
I thought this set was kinda cool - wall art and easy to analyze from a distance:

http://tinyurl.com/8xmk8ks

Posted by: my other chess set is a ... at March 31, 2012 05:35 PM (HOOye)

291 Old Overholdt

Posted by: blogforce one at March 31, 2012 05:35 PM (7cXfH)

292 291 289 I think the Jews are behind this thread... Posted by: Dead Bobby Fischer at March 31, 2012 10:25 PM (BB0/w) Heil! I need a drink. Posted by: Alexander Alekhine at March 31, 2012 10:34 PM (BB0/w) Hey - sorry I missed you guys, I was, uh, "entertaining" a young lady...in my room.

Posted by: J.R. Capablance at March 31, 2012 05:36 PM (BB0/w)

293

Posted by: Dead Bobby Fischer at March 31, 2012 10:25 PM (BB0/w)

That or the Amateur Proctologist Cabal

Posted by: 66chevelle at March 31, 2012 05:37 PM (QjSgY)

294 Can I get a rematch?

Posted by: J.R. Capablanca at March 31, 2012 05:38 PM (BB0/w)

295 I mean, they're behind an awful lot of things.

Posted by: 66chevelle at March 31, 2012 05:39 PM (QjSgY)

296 My computer chess game does something weird.  When I'm giving it a thrashing--which is very rare--it'll do something kind of human.  It does these "aw, wtf?" moves, like it gave up.  It'll start handing me material, like putting the queen in jeopardy for no reason.  "Aww, f**k it.  It doesn't matter, meatspace boy.  Here, you like that?  Have another."

Posted by: rdbrewer at March 31, 2012 05:42 PM (Iyg03)

297 Did I mention the time, during a break in a skittles tourney, the power went out and I ended up getting stuck in an elevator with the Polgar sisters? A gentleman of my stature doesn't kiss and tell, so all I can say is Check and Mate, baby! Heel, Rex - that's a good boy.

Posted by: Paul Morphy at March 31, 2012 05:53 PM (BB0/w)

298 I would have a hard time concentrating on the game if a Polgar was sitting across the board from me. Just sayin'. http://www.amazon.com/Chess-Tactics- Champions-step-step/dp/081293671X/ref=ntt_at_ep_dpi_1

Posted by: rickl supports SMOD/Supervolcano 2012 at March 31, 2012 06:23 PM (sdi6R)

299 nice rack!

Posted by: blogforce one at March 31, 2012 07:27 PM (7cXfH)

300 We should do a poll on who everybody hoping will the Anand v. Gelfand title match, I know Anand is the favorite, but I would really like to see Isreal have the world chess champion.

I would also like to see profiles on famous (and not so famous) chess players and their play styles, I always find it interesting how differently two people would play the same position.

Maybe some talk about opening theory? I'm partial to the queens gambit, and the advanced variation of the french defense, but I'm curious to see the preferences of other peoples opening repertoires.

That Judit Polgar match was interesting, I hope the Saturday night chess thread as well as a "match of the week" becomes a permanent thing here at AOS

Oh and I remember reading a study in which men become dumber when speaking to attractive women. maybe some cleavage would distract an opponent enough to tip the scales in a woman's favor?




Posted by: Rob at March 31, 2012 07:57 PM (XOtYi)

301 Maybe some talk about opening theory? I'm partial to the queens gambit, and the advanced variation of the french defense, but I'm curious to see the preferences of other peoples opening repertoires.

King's gambit for attack ... but I suck.  I love to launch all-out assaults that usually fall a half-step shy and then disintegrate into the aether ...  Good fun, though.

Posted by: ThePrimordialOrderedPair at March 31, 2012 08:20 PM (X3lox)

302 I was never much good at attacking. I never had any talent for combinations. I like slow, gradual maneuvering; games that go 20 moves before a pawn is captured. I try to build up pressure on what I perceive as weak points. When the logjam finally breaks, there can be a sudden flurry of exchanges, and hopefully I emerge with a winning endgame.

Posted by: rickl supports SMOD/Supervolcano 2012 at March 31, 2012 08:49 PM (sdi6R)

303 The post-Fischer chess story involves mainly three separate eras, based on the title as chess and boxing are bound to do.  Karpov succeeded to the throne when Fischer refused to defend on FIDE's traditional terms (or any terms other than those he demanded, as was his habit), and no one seriously doubted he was the strongest in the world besides Fischer, but there was always the doubt about a head-to-head outcome. 

Deprived of the chance to prove his worthiness, Karpov resolved to be an active champ, playing all over the world in tournaments and amassing along the way a phenomenal 120 victories.  This remains the all-time record - the distant second is Kasparov's 63 wins.  But he wasn't able to show the same dominance in matches against Korchnoi, with whom he played three intense contests.

Karpov and Kasparov contested the title five times, beginning with the marathon suspended match in 1983, through 1991.  Once he won the title in the second match, he was always able to defend it, but only barely.  Even in the last match, if Karpov hadn't made errors in time pressure on two moves, he could have won it back.

After that, Kasparov dominated, although Karpov could still bring it in the occasional tournament, and turn in some great performances, he never seemed to be able to play his best when Kasparov was in the field.  Short and Anand weren't really able to compete with Kasparov simply because of his experience.  Both missed several chances, and you can't beat Kasparov by missing chances.

Kasparov in this period kept striking new ratings highs.  He stayed #1 in the world even after losing the title to a well-prepared Kramnik.  Even though Kramnik's victory was well-deserved, many regarded it as something of a fluke, and that he dodged a rematch so resolutely tended to confirm their view.  Kasparov could hardly complain too much, as he - like Fischer - had believed and fought for the idea that the title belonged to the title, and not to FIDE.  So he retired from active competition, having achieved a rating no one else had approached before or since.

After long flirtations with championship tournaments of varying design, none of which proved satisfactory, FIDE returned to match championships, and Kramnik defended his title in matches against Leko and Topalov before finally falling to Anand, who hadn't been out of the top five since losing his own chance against Kasparov in 1995.  Anand since defended the title against Topalov, and will meet Gelfand, a strong player in his own right but probably past his prime, in May.

The elephant in the room these days is the amazing 20 year old Magnus Carlsen, who has been the top rated in the world for about a year, and keeps slowing passing ratings marks only Kasparov achieved before him.  Now he is at 2835, but it's a hard 15 points to go, and joining him in territory no others have tread is Armenian GM Lev Aronian, now at 2825 and fearing no player.

It's an exciting time for chess, with a dozen or so young and upcoming stars already threatening to enter the elite.  It's too bad the sponsorships have all dried up so much, only short matches are played now, and many top tournaments take only a handful of players to play double-round events, which is cheaper and yields outstanding chess, but makes it harder for those trying to break into the elite ranks.

Posted by: Adjoran at March 31, 2012 11:31 PM (VfmLu)

304 Chess? Why no. I'm a moron.

Posted by: Pipeholder at April 01, 2012 04:50 AM (M1PV9)

305 I know the thread is dead, but I have to share this. I played a game against my computer this afternoon. I've played very little over the past decade or so, even against the computer. I can't even remember when I last played a human opponent. So I'm very rusty. Anyway, I set the program to be a little stronger than me, and most of the time I get my ass kicked. Today I started out more or less OK, but the computer outplayed me and I wound up in a losing endgame. I decided to play it out just for the hell of it. Eventually the computer queened a pawn before I could, but then proceeded to keep checking my king instead of going in for the kill. I was practically yelling at the screen: "Dummy! All you have to do is exchange your queen for my pawn, and then promote your other pawn!" The computer lost on time! I couldn't believe it. I had stopped paying attention to the clock by that point. Here is a screenshot of the final position: http://i90.photobucket.com/albums/k247/ rickl_2006/Web/Screenshot2012-04-01at11723PM.png This was a perfect game for April Fool's Day.

Posted by: rickl supports SMOD/Supervolcano 2012 at April 01, 2012 09:11 AM (sdi6R)

306 I, for one, enjoy the chess-related posts.

Posted by: Jason at April 01, 2012 09:33 AM (x8n/y)

307 I'm glad somebody is still reading this thread, because I thought the game I mentioned above was absolutely hilarious.

Posted by: rickl supports SMOD/Supervolcano 2012 at April 01, 2012 09:44 AM (sdi6R)

308 The Wikipedia page for Judit Polgar is excellent. It features some great quotes: David Norwood, British GM, in recalling Judit beating him when he was an established player and she was just a child, described her as, "this cute little auburn-haired monster who crushed you." Edmar Mednis said he played his best game of the tournament against Judit. "I was careful in that game", he said. "Grandmasters don't like to lose to 10-year-old girls, because then we make the front page of all the papers." http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Judit_Polgár

Posted by: rickl supports SMOD/Supervolcano 2012 at April 01, 2012 09:51 AM (sdi6R)

309 I've been lurking for YEARS here, and was away from home / computer when this was posted.  I haven't even read all the comments yet and am just now delurking and adding a late post requesting further chess posts. 

I'll still be behind the curtain if anyone needs me.

Mr. Parx

Posted by: Mr. Parx at April 01, 2012 03:24 PM (H54QK)

310 Thanks for the chess threads.  I played tournament chess and coached a number of years back, but haven't done anything lately.  After last week's thread, I bought a copy of Fritz and I'm back in the game, sorta.  I'm getting my butt kicked by a ten-dollar computer program - how humiliating.  That sort of thing didn't happen when I was in shape - back in the 80s.

Posted by: Surellin at April 02, 2012 02:26 AM (zGjZa)

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