April 30, 2011

Overnight Thread-Photobomb Edition [CDR M]
— Open Blogger

Evenin' Moron Nation. You learn something new everyday and today I learned that there is actually a word that describes those photos when someone who wasn't supposed to be in it ruins the picture. The word according to the Urban Dictionary is photobomb.

This collection of photos is a twist on that phenomenon. Here are your 12 Hilarious TV Photobombs.


Moral of the story? Check what's on TV in the background before taking the pic.

So it seems the Chinese are getting ready to have their first aircraft carrier undergo harbor trials later this year thanks to their purchase of an old Soviet aircraft carrier (the Varyag) that was supposed to be converted into a giant disco/casino. Funny how that one worked out. Anyway, the rumored name for this ship is the Shi Lang. Doesn't sound too ominous does it? Well, if you care about Taiwan, it's crazy ominous. Shi Lang was a Qing Dynasty Admiral who was in command of the Manchu Fleet which destroyed the power of the Zheng Family and conquered the Kingdom of Tungning which is now known as Taiwan. I'm sure it's merely a matter of time when China will reacquire Taiwan and with President "Lead From Behind Foreign Policy" Obama in charge, they'll likely act sooner than later. However, they better hope that Teh Won wins as it seems the Chinese are still a few years away from making this carrier fully capable with aircraft.
Here's a great site to keep up to date on Chinese military developments. Andrew S. Erickson-China Analysis From Original Sources.


Now some of you morons might be more knowledgeable about Led Zepplin than I but I had no idea that they were such a ripoff band. It would seem that they have stolen many a song from relatively unknown artists and made them their own. I guess this came out some time ago but I had missed it. Here's a pretty good rundown of what they "borrowed". The following video goes into pretty good detail of how a lot of bands/groups today "borrow" from others and highlights Led Zepplin prominently. Interesting vid.

Everything is a Remix Part 1 from Kirby Ferguson on Vimeo.

In the same vein, part two of the same video series talks about movies and how they rehash the same plots/ideas. Of course, Star Wars is featured prominently this time. Some of this stuff I knew, but some of what Lucas borrowed I didn't know. Watch past the initial credits too. Pretty cool visual match ups of how Quentin Tarantino used some classic scenes from some movies for Kill Bill. Interesting to note out of the last 10 years, of the top 10 box office draws, 74 out of 100 of those movies were either remakes or sequels.

Everything is a Remix Part 2 from Kirby Ferguson on Vimeo.

Speaking of remakes/sequels. It seems Hollywood is seriously out of original material as they have 95 movie sequels in the pipelilne at various stages of development. Now some on this list aren't really in development and sound more like rumor but hey, you never know.


Ah yes, it is Caturday. Here's a video of some cat lady expert pissin' off some Cheetahs. Just crazy. She does have some nice legs though.


Obama rappin' about who he really is.


OK, stare at the dot in the center of this picture and then move your head towards your screen or away. What do you see?


The World's Ten Creepiest Abandoned Cities. How soon until Detroit and some other cities in the US make the list?

Ok, we know some of you 'ettes can tie a cherry stem into a knot with your tongue, but how many of you can do this trick?


Gratuitous Caturday Kitteh.


5 Iconic Corporate Mascots Invented By Mistake. Pretty funny that for the rest of the world, Duracell is associated with the bunny, not Energizer.

If you ask people in the U.K. which battery is associated with a bunny, though, you might hear "Duracell," because people overseas are silly and don't know any better. But also because Duracell originated the use of the drumming toy bunny as a mascot in a European commercial.


Tonight's ONT brought to you by a creepy ad from the past:

Notice: Posted by permission of AceCorp LLC. Please e-mail overnight open thread tips to maet or genghis. Otherwise send tips to Ace.

Posted by: Open Blogger at 04:38 PM | Comments (563)
Post contains 738 words, total size 7 kb.

1

OK - this needs to take off like crazy - like wildfire.

It's the RACERS!

Posted by: Lemon Kitten at April 30, 2011 04:43 PM (0fzsA)

2 I don't live too far away from Centraila (a.k.a "the birthplace of runningrn"). 

Posted by: Kratos (Ghost of Sparta) at April 30, 2011 04:45 PM (c0A3e)

3 Moral of the story? Check what's on TV in the background before taking the pic.

Also check what's in the bottom of the toity bowl before taking a MySpace pic of yourself half-naked in your bathroom (with the door locked so your mom doesn't know what you're doing, lol). 

Posted by: HeatherRadish, still drinking at April 30, 2011 04:45 PM (0vDuM)

Posted by: Wyatt Earp at April 30, 2011 04:45 PM (CqUlX)

5

In before ALMOST everybody.

And it's another Saturday night in front of the old computer.

Posted by: Reader C.J. Burch writes.... at April 30, 2011 04:46 PM (sJTmU)

6 Wow, I've led a sheltered life.  It never would have occurred to me  to even attempt something like the Hooters Girl Rodeo Beer Pouring trick. 

Posted by: someone at April 30, 2011 04:47 PM (bqjJT)

7 Thanks for the video honoring the Kitteh's Caturday.  I miss mine.

Posted by: NC Ref at April 30, 2011 04:48 PM (/izg2)

8 It's the RACERS!

Tony Katz is teh awesome.

Posted by: Wyatt Earp at April 30, 2011 04:48 PM (CqUlX)

9

another ably done ONT by CDR-M.

Three Cheers

Hip Hip

Hip Hip

Hip Hip Huzzah!

Posted by: Ben at April 30, 2011 04:49 PM (DKV43)

10

brave chick doesnt know she's prey

Posted by: navycopjoe aka peroni beer czar at April 30, 2011 04:49 PM (EOu3d)

11 Cat is a redhead.  No wonder he wears a hat.

Posted by: huerfano at April 30, 2011 04:50 PM (6zFxS)

12

cheetah vid is most excellente.

Posted by: Lemon Kitten at April 30, 2011 04:51 PM (0fzsA)

13 6 Wow, I've led a sheltered life.  It never would have occurred to me  to even attempt something like the Hooters Girl Rodeo Beer Pouring trick.


Please check out Myrtle Beach dot com...there is much decadence.

Posted by: Myrtle Beach Chamber of Commerce at April 30, 2011 04:53 PM (/izg2)

14

 

 

Posted by: Tommy Gunnarson at April 30, 2011 04:54 PM (ybA9f)

Posted by: the Jayhwaks at April 30, 2011 04:55 PM (6+RxA)

16

the hooters trick was stupid

now if she can do that while making the four stool ends disappear, well that'll get a tip

Posted by: navycopjoe aka peroni beer czar at April 30, 2011 04:56 PM (EOu3d)

17 Re: Cheetahs - m personal theory from "nature/anthro/whatever" days in school is that Cheetahs are not wild animals, they're feral.

King Cheetahs, rare but occasionally found in Cheetah packs, are wild.

Cheetahs are descended from royal pets throughout Africa, and are relatively easily returned to trained status.

Other big cats are wild and more dangerous.

Not that a Cheetah can't kill you, but I know of only a few attacks on humans, most a result of poor handling in captivity. There was one rash of attacks I know of in the wild, no fatalities.

Lions, tigers, cougars, leopards... will all kill humans (though not always when they see you or anything like that).

Cheetahs also meow and purr like housecats. They have tongues like 100-grit sandpaper and love to lick, on the other hand.

Posted by: Merovign, Dark Lord of the Sith at April 30, 2011 04:57 PM (bxiXv)

18 I have no idea how I've lucked into first place.  For once, my strategy of picking guys I like has worked out.

Posted by: NC Ref at April 30, 2011 04:57 PM (/izg2)

19 Howdy!

The lady is spinning counter-clockwise... errr, I mean the light green circle (second from the outside) turns clockwise when I move the screen further away.  And btw thanks soooo much for making me look like a fool to the hubby! 

Posted by: Y-not at April 30, 2011 04:58 PM (pW2o8)

20

now if she can do that while making the four stool ends disappear, well that'll get a tip

Martini.  Stirred, not shaken.

 

Posted by: James Bond at April 30, 2011 04:58 PM (6+RxA)

21 Do you think China will/would have to take Taiwan by force? I got some sense last year that Taiwan would end up with politicians that just vote in a reunion with mainland China. I have zero expertise in this, but it just seemed like going that way.

Posted by: palerider at April 30, 2011 05:00 PM (FYUWS)

22 at the end of the cheetah video - she ends up snuggling with one of the cheetahs.  hot.

Posted by: Lemon Kitten at April 30, 2011 05:01 PM (0fzsA)

23 Rubbin's Racing!!!  Its like bumper cars!

Posted by: NC Ref at April 30, 2011 05:01 PM (/izg2)

24 ugggh, dumbass is on

Posted by: navycopjoe aka peroni beer czar at April 30, 2011 05:02 PM (EOu3d)

25 Toonces at the Correspondents dinner right now. Why do I torture myself this way?

Posted by: Cheri at April 30, 2011 05:02 PM (BA8k3)

26

Posted by: Wyatt Earp at April 30, 2011 09:45 PM (CqUlX)

Given that Spain's unemployment rate is about 20%, anything that can even potentially dissuade people from visiting there is a bad thing. 

And Spain obviously has bigger problems than the scourge of bikinis.

Posted by: Kratos (Ghost of Sparta) at April 30, 2011 05:02 PM (c0A3e)

27 22 Do you think China will/would have to take Taiwan by force? I got some sense last year that Taiwan would end up with politicians that just vote in a reunion with mainland China. I have zero expertise in this, but it just seemed like going that way.

Posted by: palerider at April 30, 2011 10:00 PM (FYUWS)

I don't think the *politicians* will vote for re-unification, a bunch of brainless students might.

Do you know how many "troublemaking" politicians *disappeared* after Hong Kong went back? If it looks like a done deal, a lot of politicians and regular folk will flee Taiwan.

Posted by: Merovign, Dark Lord of the Sith at April 30, 2011 05:02 PM (bxiXv)

28 Trump is there and he looks pissed as Obama talks about the birth certificate

Posted by: Cheri at April 30, 2011 05:03 PM (BA8k3)

29 Cheetahs (trained ones or at least calm ones) are snugglicious. Don't take my word for that and rush out into the wild and hug one, though.

Also, I have to find a copy of that without the Frog lady blabbing all over the dialogue.

I want to see the part where she races the Cheetahs on her dirt bike.

Posted by: Merovign, Dark Lord of the Sith at April 30, 2011 05:04 PM (bxiXv)

30 uggggh, he about as funny as a skin rash

Posted by: navycopjoe aka peroni beer czar at April 30, 2011 05:06 PM (EOu3d)

31 she ends up snuggling with one of the cheetahs

So that's what's on the Edwards tape that the judge wants unsealed: http://tinyurl.com/3manrqb

Posted by: PA Cat at April 30, 2011 05:06 PM (D0gfT)

32 You guys who are watching teh Lightworker are gluttons for punishment.  I'd rather be eaten by a pack of cheetahs than watch that horrid man.


Our snow is melted and it's a lovely early evening here.  Sun is hitting hte snow up on the mountains.  Verrry purty. 

Posted by: Y-not at April 30, 2011 05:07 PM (pW2o8)

33 22 Do you think China will/would have to take Taiwan by force? I got some sense last year that Taiwan would end up with politicians that just vote in a reunion with mainland China. I have zero expertise in this, but it just seemed like going that way.

I've heard the same thing from some Taiwanese politicians over the past few years - that they'll gradually integrate with mainland China via increased trade.  There was a story that I saw earlier this year about an author, Yuan Hongbing, who claimed that the Chi-Coms will attack Taiwan in 2012 and finally solve the "Taiwan question". 

Posted by: Kratos (Ghost of Sparta) at April 30, 2011 05:07 PM (c0A3e)

34

I think Taiwan will vote for a reunion in the same way that store owners make voluntary donations to the Mafia.

Posted by: Secundus at April 30, 2011 05:08 PM (t2Zxt)

35 Heh.  And Darlington is next week.  Booger has done a great job getting back into the league after missing Daytona.

That's true.  If I had to bet on a winner tonight, I might not bet on myself.  Yeah, right.  Although my laissez-faire management style has been working so far! 

Posted by: NC Ref at April 30, 2011 05:08 PM (/izg2)

36 I didn't know Lieutenant Ilea used a hairdryer. Maybe she wasn't bald *everywhere*.

Posted by: Tom Servo at April 30, 2011 05:09 PM (wk1nH)

37 ugggh, dumbass is on

Which one? (anyone seen Sheriff Joe lately?)

Posted by: PA Cat at April 30, 2011 05:09 PM (D0gfT)

38 Interesting, tepid response to the Paul Ryan joke.

Posted by: AD at April 30, 2011 05:10 PM (zJa0b)

39 Re: Hooters Bar Stool Trick video:

"Is that legal?"

Bitch, that shit is *mandatory*! Woohoo!

Actually, I am quite impressed at her hand-eye coordination and sense of balance. She can be on my fire team any day.

Posted by: Merovign, Dark Lord of the Sith at April 30, 2011 05:10 PM (bxiXv)

40 Hollyweird's mission to ruin our childhood (and other) memories continues:

Die Hard 5 and 6

Bruce Willis has confirmed he’s looking to reprise the role of John McClane for two more Die Hard movies. The fifth movie is going under the tentative title of Die Hard 24/7 (although rumours of a Die Hard/24 crossover seem wide of the mark).

Noam Murro has been recruited to direct the next film, and the expectation is that it will be in cinemas in 2012. Then, expect to wait a couple of years for the final outing of John McClane.


Posted by: Kratos (Ghost of Sparta) at April 30, 2011 05:10 PM (c0A3e)

41 What's Obama on about, this time?  Or is it just more boilerplate garbage?

Posted by: Secundus at April 30, 2011 05:11 PM (t2Zxt)

42

Now some of you morons might be more knowledgeable about Led Zepplin than I but I had no idea that they were such a ripoff band. It would seem that they have stolen many a song from relatively unknown artists and made them their own. I guess this came out some time ago but I had missed it

There is a book that was written about a bunch of songs that do this.  Including The Beatles.  And I believe that part of Smells Like Teen Spirit by Nirvana utilizes a Boston song.  In fact the book title is from that. 

Sounds Like Teen Spirit: Stolen Melodies, Ripped-Off Riffs, and the Secret History of Rock and Roll

Posted by: buzzion at April 30, 2011 05:12 PM (oVQFe)

43

Posted by: buzzion at April 30, 2011 10:12 PM (oVQFe)

 

There's nothing new under the sun.

Posted by: garrett at April 30, 2011 05:14 PM (6+RxA)

44 Ok, we know some of you 'ettes can tie a cherry stem into a knot with your tongue, but how many of you can do this trick?

I need to go to Hooters more.

Posted by: 18-1 at April 30, 2011 05:14 PM (bgcml)

45 However, they better hope that Teh Won wins as it seems the Chinese are still a few years away from making this carrier fully capable with aircraft.

The next time the Chi-Coms buy up some US treasuries, they'll ask for some aircraft as collateral. 

And I still don't think China's logistical capabilities are ready yet for a sustained operation to take back Taiwan by first, as Taiwan still has the technology and home-field advantage.  Of course, this assumes that the US will back up Taiwan should open conflict erupt and with Sissypants in charge, that's far from a certainly, especially since His official foreign policy is "help our enemies, screw-over our allies". 

Posted by: Kratos (Ghost of Sparta) at April 30, 2011 05:15 PM (c0A3e)

46 Always remember, we don't have an 'effin Taiwan to run to. This is the hill to die on!

...unless there's an open bar at Obama's future "health clinics/soylent-green factories," then it'll be "welcome comrades!"

Posted by: derit at April 30, 2011 05:16 PM (FQlFL)

47 I need to go to Hooters more.

I heard they have decent wings, *shrugs*. 

Posted by: Kratos (Ghost of Sparta) at April 30, 2011 05:16 PM (c0A3e)

48 Ok, I know I can count on you guys to help me make the important decisions.

What movie should I  watch next  - Zombie Land or Dr Horrible's Sing Along?

Posted by: 18-1 at April 30, 2011 05:17 PM (bgcml)

49 I would fall over and knock myself unconscious if I tried that barstool trick.

Posted by: ParanoidAnxietyGirlInSeattle at April 30, 2011 05:17 PM (RZ8pf)

50 Finally saw Source Code, pretty good movie but having the white patriotic guy be the villain was beyond lame.

Posted by: booger at April 30, 2011 05:17 PM (9RFH1)

51 46

Posted by: buzzion at April 30, 2011 10:12 PM (oVQFe)

 

There's nothing new under the sun.

Posted by: garrett at April 30, 2011 10:14 PM (6+RxA)

Gee you don't say.

Posted by: buzzion at April 30, 2011 05:17 PM (oVQFe)

52 i love how people post UFO-videos ...UFOs with lights......blinking lights too.....gotta love it...the new one is over lake erie....cuz you know...its eerie....


.....i gotta make a beer run.

and the ONT's arent much without ace fighting half of his commenters...cmon people, liven the shit up...

Posted by: skr8 outta at April 30, 2011 05:17 PM (zcTu+)

53 I didn't know Lieutenant Ilea used a hairdryer.
Maybe she wasn't bald *everywhere*.
Posted by: Tom Servo at April 30, 2011 10:09 PM (wk1nH)

Oh yeah...

Posted by: V'ger at April 30, 2011 05:18 PM (LZTNd)

54

I heard they have decent wings, *shrugs*. 

Worst case of food poisoning I've had in my life, was from Hooters.  Every other time I've been there the food was crap.  They should change the name to Beer 'n' Bouncies and stop pretending they're a restaurant.

Posted by: Secundus at April 30, 2011 05:19 PM (t2Zxt)

55 I would fall over and knock myself unconscious if I tried that barstool trick.

Posted by: ParanoidAnxietyGirlInSeattle at April 30, 2011 10:17 PM (RZ8pf)

Gggty Gggty! Today is my lucky day!

Posted by: Glenn Quagmire at April 30, 2011 05:19 PM (bgcml)

56 What movie should I watch next - Zombie Land or Dr Horrible's Sing Along? Posted by: 18-1 at April 30, 2011 10:17 PM (bgcml) Zombieland.

Posted by: eman: Japanese Babe Rescue Team at April 30, 2011 05:20 PM (p2AIq)

57

Gee you don't say.

Posted by: buzzion at April 30, 2011 10:17 PM (oVQFe)

The best part of this post is that I am fairy sure this link has been posted here half a dozen times already,

Posted by: 18-1 at April 30, 2011 05:20 PM (bgcml)

58 Finally saw Source Code, pretty good movie but having the white patriotic guy be the villain was beyond lame.

Posted by: booger at April 30, 2011 10:17 PM (9RFH1)

Come on, how many major Hollywood releases don't have the white patriotic guy as the villain?

Its like wondering why you don't see burkas on the girls in anime.

Posted by: 18-1 at April 30, 2011 05:21 PM (bgcml)

59 " What movie should I watch next - Zombie Land or Dr Horrible's Sing Along?"

....always zombies...

....then prepare for it....weve all done it....and we continue to do it...

Posted by: skr8 outta at April 30, 2011 05:22 PM (zcTu+)

60 If China takes Taiwan, the Chinese Empire will crumble.

Posted by: eman: Japanese Babe Rescue Team at April 30, 2011 05:24 PM (p2AIq)

61 What about Phish?  I'm pretty sure they didn't rip anybody else's songs off.

Guelah Papyrus, Axilla, Chalkdust Torture, Colonel Forbin's Ascent, Down With Disease, Fluffhead, Golgi Apparatus, I Am Hydrogen, Icculus, Lawnboy, The Oh Kee Pah Ceremony, Sample In A Jar, Weekapaug Groove, Wolfman's Brother, You Enjoy Myself.

Good times, good times.

Posted by: FUBAR at April 30, 2011 05:24 PM (1fanL)

62 49 Always remember, we don't have an 'effin Taiwan to run to. This is the hill to die on!

...unless there's an open bar at Obama's future "health clinics/soylent-green factories," then it'll be "welcome comrades!"

Posted by: derit at April 30, 2011 10:16 PM (FQlFL)

No worries, Taiwan is safe since we drafted him.

Posted by: The Raiduhs! at April 30, 2011 05:24 PM (RoMkZ)

63 At least Led Zep made some great music.

Posted by: TexasJew at April 30, 2011 05:24 PM (uR5Zf)

64 Ok, Zombies it is.

And hopefully Woodie Harrelson getting his face eaten off.

Posted by: 18-1 at April 30, 2011 05:24 PM (bgcml)

65 When I look at the circle image I see a great eye, wreathed in flame, piercing stone and flesh.

I also see that when I look at pictures of Obama.

And, surprisingly, when I look at pictures of William Frawley.

Posted by: Trimegistus at April 30, 2011 05:25 PM (xUJfI)

66 You Enjoy Myself is just loverly.

Posted by: FUBAR at April 30, 2011 05:25 PM (1fanL)

67 As a lifelong Zep Head, I have to say that it's common knowledge at this point that they did their share of, um, borrowing. And, bands have been copying Zeppelin for 40 years. It's a wonderful circle. I think Milton Berle once said something like there are only 3 jokes, and people make their living on how they tell those three jokes. Something like that. Rock and Roll is the same.

Posted by: Joejm65 at April 30, 2011 05:26 PM (1LZ8Q)

68

The best part of this post is that I am fairy sure this link has been posted here half a dozen times already,

Posted by: 18-1 at April 30, 2011 10:20 PM (bgcml)

Well excluding the times its been posted in the actual post, I'm probably responsible for over half the times its been in the comments.   So I'm only stealing from myself.

Posted by: buzzion at April 30, 2011 05:27 PM (oVQFe)

69 "As a lifelong Zep Head, I have to say that it's common knowledge at this point that they did their share of, um, borrowing."

---they did use old blues tunes , its true...

....but good lord did the blues copy itself over and over...hell, most blues is just ....its just like....are there really 3 different blues songs? yeah?

Posted by: skr8 outta at April 30, 2011 05:27 PM (zcTu+)

70 57 I heard they have decent wings, *shrugs*.  Worst case of food poisoning I've had in my life, was from Hooters.  Every other time I've been there the food was crap.  They should change the name to Beer 'n' Bouncies and stop pretending they're a restaurant.>>>> I agree. Hooters food sucks. They don't even try to make good food. And, the name is misleading because most of the chicks who work there have anything but hooters. They should rename the chain Plywoods.

Posted by: Joejm65 at April 30, 2011 05:28 PM (1LZ8Q)

71 64
If China takes Taiwan, the Chinese Empire will crumble.

Why do you say that?  It's a matter of national pride for the Chi-Coms that they will eventually reunite with Taiwan (I've tried taking to several Chinese students/lab techs in my department about this and I always end up treading lightly about the subject). 

Posted by: Kratos (Ghost of Sparta) at April 30, 2011 05:28 PM (c0A3e)

72

Come on, how many major Hollywood releases don't have the white patriotic guy as the villain?

Its like wondering why you don't see burkas on the girls in anime.

Yeah, but this was even lamer than usual, even the most rabid, whitey hating dem wouldn't be able to buy that guy as the villain. It was like they put Mr. Rogers in the role of the bad guy, decent movie otherwise.

Posted by: booger at April 30, 2011 05:28 PM (9RFH1)

73

Posted by: 18-1 at April 30, 2011 10:24 PM (bgcml)

If you're looking for movies where Woody dies, may I recommend 2012  

Posted by: Kratos (Ghost of Sparta) at April 30, 2011 05:29 PM (c0A3e)

74 Hollywood's suffering from a lack of education, not a lack of ideas. The fools have no 'effin clue of all the material out there in the western canon to plumb.

Posted by: derit at April 30, 2011 05:30 PM (FQlFL)

75 ....but good lord did the blues copy itself over and over...hell, most blues is just ....its just like....are there really 3 different blues songs? yeah?


Generic Blues.

Posted by: HeatherRadish, still drinking at April 30, 2011 05:32 PM (0vDuM)

76 Why do you say that? It's a matter of national pride for the Chi-Coms that they will eventually reunite with Taiwan (I've tried taking to several Chinese students/lab techs in my department about this and I always end up treading lightly about the subject). Posted by: Kratos (Ghost of Sparta) at April 30, 2011 10:28 PM (c0A3e) Conquest is one thing. Control is another. Taking Taiwan by force will set events in motion that can lead to the opposite of what the Chinese want and expect.

Posted by: eman: Japanese Babe Rescue Team at April 30, 2011 05:34 PM (p2AIq)

77

Posted by: Kratos

IIRC, he also died in The Thin Red Line, but I wouldn't recommend that movie to Satan.

Posted by: Secundus at April 30, 2011 05:34 PM (t2Zxt)

78 Chalk Dust Torture


Come stumble my mirth beaten worker
I'm Jezmund the family berzerker
I'm bought for the price of a flagon of rice
The wind buffs the cabin
You speak of your life
Or more willingly Locust the Lurker

Confuse what you can of the ending
And revise your despise so impending
'Cause I soak on the wrath
That you didn't quite mask
I'm getting it clearly through alternate paths
Or mixed in with the signal you're sending

But who can unlearn all the facts that I've learned
As I sat in their chairs and my synapses burned
And the torture of chalk dust collects on my tongue
Thoughts follow my vision and dance in the sun
All my vasoconstrictors they come slowly undone
Can't I live while I'm young?

But no peace for Jezmund tonight
I plug the distress tube up tight
And watch what I say as it flutters away
And all this emotion is kept harmless at bay
Not to educate somebody's fright

Posted by: FUBAR at April 30, 2011 05:38 PM (1fanL)

79 I don't really get upset over the Zep stuff. The blues & folk stuff was out there. The entire song isn't a copy they used riffs and lyrics. I'm sure they probably thought the stuff was in public domain so what's the big deal. But they should have credited properly. Even the other stuff like the opening to Stairway I don't find a big deal. It was just very common then. Stairway to heaven would never have become an iconic song if the entire thing consisted of repeating the opening. People forget Page was a session guitarist. Session guitaring is basically the art of tweaking existing stuff.  Rarely is what he used the actual hook of the song but is meant as filler. He used interesting stuff he had heard to fill out a melody which is something session guitarists do. People were hypersensitive to owning every note of a song 30 years ago as they are now. In the 50's it was one big ripoff merry go round.


Posted by: Rocks at April 30, 2011 05:38 PM (th0op)

80 Taking Taiwan by force will set events in motion that can lead to the opposite of what the Chinese want and expect.

I can buy that.  We'll just have to see.  However, if China manages to take back Taiwan against our expressed desire, it is yet another blow, perhaps a fatal blow, to American prestige and power. 

Posted by: Kratos (Ghost of Sparta) at April 30, 2011 05:40 PM (c0A3e)

81
It's hard to believe Led Zepplin stole more old blues stuff than The Rolling Stones.

I guess you can give at least give The Stones credit, however, for attributing about 1% of what they stole.

Posted by: Ed Anger at April 30, 2011 05:42 PM (7+pP9)

82 85 This!

Posted by: Obama at April 30, 2011 05:42 PM (HEjjS)

83 I couldn't watch the thin red line past the first 5 minutes. booooooooooring

Posted by: alexthedude mobile edition at April 30, 2011 05:43 PM (oWUao)

84 "In the 50's it was one big ripoff merry go round."

Shoo-bee-doobie-do-wop-wop!

There were some great tunes back then, but most of those do-wop songs await me in Hell. And Seattle grunge and boy bands...[shudder]

Posted by: derit at April 30, 2011 05:43 PM (FQlFL)

85 So, you thought you could have an ONT without me, huh?

Posted by: Papa Editor at April 30, 2011 05:43 PM (6neGz)

86 83 Chalk Dust Torture

Yeah, but maybe they didn't rip anyone off because no one had thought to use "vasoconstrictors" in a song before.

Anyway, you forgot Divided Sky. And NICU. And Rift...

Well, anyway, I applaud your taste.

But I love Zep too. I acknowledge their debts, and their stinginess and borderline dishonesty (IMO) in repaying them. But I still love their music.

Posted by: Splunge at April 30, 2011 05:43 PM (2IW5Q)

87 So Obama apparently bombed at the White House Correspondents' Dinner.

Posted by: Miss'80sBaby at April 30, 2011 05:44 PM (7isMp)

88 Editor, were you George Lucas last night?

Posted by: ParanoidAnxietyGirlInSeattle at April 30, 2011 05:45 PM (RZ8pf)

89 Hi all Went to a concert tonite - ode to joy, that's some good shit there

Posted by: chemjeff at April 30, 2011 05:45 PM (qoR4D)

90 And Miss80sBaby, did you watch Doctor Who tonight?

Posted by: ParanoidAnxietyGirlInSeattle at April 30, 2011 05:45 PM (RZ8pf)

91 I couldn't watch the thin red line past the first 5 minutes. booooooooooring

Once you're half an hour in you want the protagonist to die so badly.

Posted by: toby928 at April 30, 2011 05:46 PM (GTbGH)

92 Yes, but it was meant for only one comment.  Why?

Posted by: Papa Editor at April 30, 2011 05:46 PM (6neGz)

93 92 Really?But they are his biggest fans.

Posted by: steevy at April 30, 2011 05:46 PM (HEjjS)

94 95 And Miss80sBaby, did you watch Doctor Who tonight?

No. Was it good?

Posted by: Miss'80sBaby at April 30, 2011 05:46 PM (7isMp)

95 93 Editor, were you George Lucas last night?

Posted by: ParanoidAnxietyGirlInSeattle at April 30, 2011 10:45 PM (RZ8pf)

Nobody's going to admit that.

Posted by: Merovign, Dark Lord of the Sith at April 30, 2011 05:47 PM (bxiXv)

96 Yeah, but maybe they didn't rip anyone off because no one had thought to use "vasoconstrictors" in a song before.

Anyway, you forgot Divided Sky. And NICU. And Rift...

Well, anyway, I applaud your taste.

But I love Zep too. I acknowledge their debts, and their stinginess and borderline dishonesty (IMO) in repaying them. But I still love their music.

Posted by: Splunge at April 30, 2011 10:43 PM (2IW5Q)

Oh, I'm a big Zep fan.  Just saying, Phish was original.

Flesh from Satan's dogs will make/The ruminants of gruel.

Posted by: FUBAR at April 30, 2011 05:47 PM (1fanL)

97 My favorite line in Doctor Who was when the FBI agent shot the alien and said "Welcome to America" or something like that. I was pleasantly surprised that at least for these first episodes it wasn't that the aliens were good and the humans were bad, but back to the old formula of the aliens being the bad guys.

Posted by: ParanoidAnxietyGirlInSeattle at April 30, 2011 05:47 PM (RZ8pf)

98 Wait, I better go back and see if anyone else socked Lucas later.

Posted by: Papa Editor at April 30, 2011 05:47 PM (6neGz)

99 Last night's Camelot sucked.  I'm losing hope for the series.

Posted by: toby928 at April 30, 2011 05:47 PM (GTbGH)

100 81 I figure I'll wait to see 2012 until next year.

lol.  When I was invited to see 2012 in the theaters last year, I already had my "review" of it written in my mind.  I was pleasantly surprised - it was a good experience watching it.  This isn't to say that 2012 is a great movie, it is far from that, but the acting was decent, the special effects were really good, and there were some memorable lines scattered throughout the movie (I liked Oliver Platt's "You mean life isn't fair?" mini-rant near the end of the movie, especially since Platt's character is set-up to be the stand-in for George W. Bush).

I'd say 2012 may be Emmerich's best film IMHO.  That is damning with faint praise though. 

Posted by: Kratos (Ghost of Sparta) at April 30, 2011 05:47 PM (c0A3e)

101 Because I thought it was you but then I wasn't sure so I didn't know who was telling me it was going to be 67 this weekend.

Posted by: ParanoidAnxietyGirlInSeattle at April 30, 2011 05:48 PM (RZ8pf)

102 Slow night, other people must have social lives.

Posted by: Merovign, Dark Lord of the Sith at April 30, 2011 05:48 PM (bxiXv)

103 On the other hand, Justified still rocks.

Posted by: toby928 at April 30, 2011 05:48 PM (GTbGH)

104 So Obama apparently bombed at the White House Correspondents' Dinner. Posted by: Miss'80sBaby at April 30, 2011 10:44 PM (7isMp) so what, that's 5 wars now?

Posted by: alexthedude mobile edition at April 30, 2011 05:48 PM (SvEXB)

105 Via Althouse, the latest trend

Posted by: Y-not at April 30, 2011 05:48 PM (pW2o8)

106 So Obama apparently bombed at the White House Correspondents' Dinner.

Jonas Bros hardest hit?

Posted by: HeatherRadish, still drinking at April 30, 2011 05:49 PM (0vDuM)

Posted by: Miss'80sBaby at April 30, 2011 05:49 PM (7isMp)

108 Who can make a front sight for my Arisaka?

Posted by: GGE of the Moron Horde at April 30, 2011 05:49 PM (f4gk9)

109 Oh, yeah, that was me who said it was supposed to be 67 tomorrow.

Posted by: Papa Editor at April 30, 2011 05:49 PM (6neGz)

110 So Obama apparently bombed at the White House Correspondents' Dinner. Posted by: Miss'80sBaby at April 30, 2011 10:44 PM (7isMp) We know.

Posted by: Libyan Kids at April 30, 2011 05:50 PM (p2AIq)

111 Miss80sBaby, I liked the season premiere of Doctor Who actually. A bit creepy, I think I may have nightmares, and the boy at one point climbed behind me on the couch and barricaded himself in. But, considering how much I don't like the Matt Smith doctor, I was pleasantly surprised that I liked it. I do love Amy Pond though.

Posted by: ParanoidAnxietyGirlInSeattle at April 30, 2011 05:50 PM (RZ8pf)

112 107 Slow night, other people must have social lives

Not necessarily.  I was off-line for a few because I was taking a nap.  I think it's the first non-sick nap I've taken in a decade or more. 

Posted by: Y-not at April 30, 2011 05:50 PM (pW2o8)

113 51 see zombieland

Posted by: chemjeff at April 30, 2011 05:50 PM (qoR4D)

114 Via Althouse, the latest trend

Bring back the half-beard.  Beard on one side, clean shaven on the other.

Posted by: toby928 at April 30, 2011 05:50 PM (GTbGH)

115
However, if China manages to take back Taiwan against our expressed desire, it is yet another blow, perhaps a fatal blow, to American prestige and power. 

Posted by: Kratos (Ghost of Sparta) at April 30, 2011 10:40 PM (c0A3e)

Thanks for the project.

I'm gonna write a Tom Clancy type novel about Taiwan stealing Iran's nuclear technology and building a bomb to force a nuclear standoff with mainland China.

It'll make me a gazillionare.

Posted by: Ed Anger at April 30, 2011 05:51 PM (7+pP9)

116 I can't jump into the middle of a series, I have to go back and watch all the New Whos from the beginning. I saw the first few, I think.

I saw most of the original series - about 23 of the 25 years worth. A few were destroyed, some have been reconstructed as audio. I missed a few and haven't found them all yet.

Posted by: Merovign, Dark Lord of the Sith at April 30, 2011 05:51 PM (bxiXv)

117 This has to be the lamest death of civilization evah.

Posted by: HeatherRadish, still drinking at April 30, 2011 05:51 PM (0vDuM)

118 Oh, another great part of 2012 - Danny Glover's character being hit in the face with an aircraft carrier, the U.S.S. John F Kennedy. 

Posted by: Kratos (Ghost of Sparta) at April 30, 2011 05:52 PM (c0A3e)

119 Were the Jonas brothers in attendance? I may have to re-think my opinion of them. I assumed they'd performed for the Obama daughters under duress. Nick always looks slightly ill in the PSAs with Michelle Obama.

Posted by: ParanoidAnxietyGirlInSeattle at April 30, 2011 05:53 PM (RZ8pf)

120 Hey-Yoh!  Been sorta following JEF's dinner on Twitter, not watching it myself.  My question to those who ARE watching:  So, it's not all that different from any other speech he's given when he trashes everybody else, like Ryan and the USSC, and tonight I guess it's The Donald's turn?


Posted by: Theresa D at April 30, 2011 05:53 PM (5axVp)

121 yeah, at least they killed Rome with fire

Posted by: alexthedude mobile edition at April 30, 2011 05:53 PM (SvEXB)

122 Via Althouse, the latest trend

Posted by: Y-not at April 30, 2011 10:48 PM (pW2o

She bugs me.

Posted by: FUBAR at April 30, 2011 05:53 PM (1fanL)

123 Don't everyone answer at once...

Posted by: GGE of the Moron Horde at April 30, 2011 05:53 PM (f4gk9)

124

Obama joked about his birth certificate by showing what he dubbed his "birth video." The video was a clip from the opening scene of "The Lion King."

"I want to make clear to the Fox News table--that was a joke," Obama said.


So let me get third straight. He wants to come up with a way to riff on his birth in Africa  and his answer is to compare himself to a king?

Posted by: Rocks at April 30, 2011 05:54 PM (th0op)

125 What's a JEF?

Posted by: GGE of the Moron Horde at April 30, 2011 05:54 PM (f4gk9)

126 Begone, Sock!

Posted by: eman: Japanese Babe Rescue Team at April 30, 2011 05:54 PM (p2AIq)

127 100 Flesh from Satan's dogs will make/The ruminants of gruel.

Maybe so -- and maybe not.

Posted by: Splunge at April 30, 2011 05:54 PM (2IW5Q)

128 Kratos no shit I got the dirtiest look the time I accidentally referred to my Taiwanese advisor as Chinese - I only made that mistake once

Posted by: chemjeff at April 30, 2011 05:54 PM (qoR4D)

129 More Obama jokes:

President Obama on NPR's table - "Wait, Wait Don't Fund Me" #nerdprom

POTUS on Paul Ryan Budget: "He's not here tonight. Unfortunately, there's no room in his budget for laughter..." #NerdProm

Obama sez Michele Bachmann is at the #whcd. "Which is weird, because I heard she was born in Canada. Yes, Michelle, this is how it starts."


At least Seth Myers tried to be funny:

"What can I say about Joe Biden that hasn't already been said incorrectly by Joe Biden".

Posted by: Miss'80sBaby at April 30, 2011 05:54 PM (7isMp)

130 I'd say 2012 may be Emmerich's best film IMHO. That is damning with faint praise though.

Posted by: Kratos (Ghost of Sparta) at April 30, 2011 10:47 PM (c0A3e)

I literally could not get past the *trailer* of that movie - I was so offended by the accumulated dumbness in just a couple of minutes.

Posted by: Merovign, Dark Lord of the Sith at April 30, 2011 05:55 PM (bxiXv)

131 What's a JEF?

Posted by: GGE of the Moron Horde at April 30, 2011 10:54 PM (f4gk9)

Jug-Eared Fuck.  Or Fool.

Posted by: FUBAR at April 30, 2011 05:55 PM (1fanL)

132 Jackass Eating Flakes?


Posted by: GGE of the Moron Horde at April 30, 2011 05:55 PM (f4gk9)

133 I'm gonna write a Tom Clancy type novel about Taiwan stealing Iran's nuclear technology and building a bomb to force a nuclear standoff with mainland China.

Taiwan is most likely "4 quarter-turns on a warhead" from having deliverable nuclear weapons already.   

Posted by: Kratos (Ghost of Sparta) at April 30, 2011 05:55 PM (c0A3e)

134 131 Jug Eared Fuck.

Posted by: steevy at April 30, 2011 05:55 PM (HEjjS)

135 heh, OK.  He's giving yet another speech?  Damn, sorry I missed it.

Posted by: GGE of the Moron Horde at April 30, 2011 05:56 PM (f4gk9)

136 Everybody back home has beards like that.

Posted by: Dr. Richard Mann at April 30, 2011 05:56 PM (xUJfI)

137 "So let me get third straight. He wants to come up with a way to riff on his birth in Africa  and his answer is to compare himself to a king?"

--- no....lion king...africa...lions live in africa...he was supposedly born in africa...yeah...he's ummm, witty or something...


Posted by: skr8 outta at April 30, 2011 05:56 PM (zcTu+)

138 What's a JEF? Posted by: GGE of the Moron Horde at April 30, 2011 10:54 PM (f4gk9) Jug-Eared (fill in blank).

Posted by: eman: Japanese Babe Rescue Team at April 30, 2011 05:56 PM (p2AIq)

139 113 Who can make a front sight for my Arisaka?

Posted by: GGE of the Moron Horde at April 30, 2011 10:49 PM (f4gk9)

99? 38? 44?

Posted by: Merovign, Dark Lord of the Sith at April 30, 2011 05:57 PM (bxiXv)

140

Posted by: Miss'80sBaby at April 30, 2011 10:54 PM (7isMp)

Wow.  Where's the vaudville hook when you need it?

Posted by: Secundus at April 30, 2011 05:58 PM (t2Zxt)

141

99? 38? 44?

Posted by: Merovign, Dark Lord of the Sith at April 30, 2011 10:57 PM (bxiXv)


Older. Type 30.

Posted by: GGE of the Moron Horde at April 30, 2011 05:58 PM (f4gk9)

142 116 Miss80sBaby, I liked the season premiere of Doctor Who actually. A bit creepy, I think I may have nightmares, and the boy at one point climbed behind me on the couch and barricaded himself in. But, considering how much I don't like the Matt Smith doctor, I was pleasantly surprised that I liked it. I do love Amy Pond though.

How creepy are the Silence as compared to the Weeping Angels? The pictures look a bit creepy.

Posted by: Miss'80sBaby at April 30, 2011 05:58 PM (7isMp)

143 Scent of a Mule

Till she stopped the mule and she kicked the rump
And the big old mule took a big old dump
Trey likes to show off.

Posted by: FUBAR at April 30, 2011 05:59 PM (1fanL)

Posted by: OxyCon at April 30, 2011 05:59 PM (eJ7Yr)

145 Posted by: buzzion at April 30, 2011 10:17 PM (oVQFe) That's funny. I am friends with the session guitarist who did the N. Imbruglyia tune in that list.

Posted by: garrett at April 30, 2011 06:00 PM (6+RxA)

146

Decadence Alert!  Danger, Will Robinson Kratos!

Demotivational Boobs  (previewtinyurl.com)

NSFW, unless your work is a garage with tool cutie calendars everywhere.

Posted by: Count de Monet at April 30, 2011 06:00 PM (XBM1t)

147 One hour to May Day, comrades! It's a shame that a past enemy of the glorious revolution will be receiving a post-humorous honor from a glorified opiate den on this occasion.

But rejoice, for our dear leader will soon be liquidating those turncoat smear-merchants in that uptight hellhole, San Francisco.

Posted by: derit at April 30, 2011 06:01 PM (FQlFL)

148 We've got to raise the debt ceiling. It's the only way our creditors will know that we're serious about paying off our loans. Bravo, Timmy. Your grasp of finance is staggering.

Posted by: WTF? at April 30, 2011 06:01 PM (FcR7P)

149

OT, but I'd just like to say that I'm thinking about mailing a bucket of golf balls to the White House, a la Henry V.

Naturally, I denounce myself.

Posted by: Secundus at April 30, 2011 06:01 PM (t2Zxt)

150 145 Wow.  Where's the vaudville hook when you need it?

The jokes seem to have been strange, vicious, or a combination of the two. Comedy is not his strong point.

Posted by: Miss'80sBaby at April 30, 2011 06:01 PM (7isMp)

151
>>Obama rappin' about who he really is...



Tax his land,
Tax his bed,
Tax the table,
At which he's fed.

Tax his tractor,
Tax his mule,
Teach him taxes
Are the rule.

Tax his work,
Tax his pay,
He works for
peanuts anyway!

Tax his cow,
Tax his goat,
Tax his pants,
Tax his coat.

Tax his ties,
Tax his shirt,
Tax his work,
Tax his dirt.

Tax his tobacco,
Tax his drink,
Tax him if he
Tries to think.

Tax his cigars,
Tax his beers,
If he cries
Tax his tears.

Tax his car,
Tax his gas,
Find other ways
To tax his ass.

Tax all he has
Then let him know
That you won't be done
Till he has no dough.

When he screams and hollers;
Then tax him some more,
Tax him till
He's good and sore.

Then tax his coffin,
Tax his grave,
Tax the sod in
Which he's laid...

Put these words
Upon his tomb,
'Taxes drove me
to my doom...'

When he's gone,
Do not relax,
Its time to apply
The inheritance tax.

Accounts Receivable Tax
Building Permit Tax
CDL license Tax
Cigarette Tax
Corporate Income Tax
Dog License Tax
Excise Taxes
Federal Income Tax
Federal Unemployment Tax (FUTA)
Fishing License Tax
Food License Tax
Fuel Permit Tax
Gasoline Tax (currently 44.75 cents per gallon)
Gross Receipts Tax
Hunting License Tax
Inheritance Tax
Inventory Tax
IRS Interest Charges
IRS Penalties (tax on top of tax)
Liquor Tax
Luxury Taxes
Marriage License Tax
Medicare Tax
Personal Property Tax
Property Tax
Real Estate Tax
Service Charge Tax
Social Security Tax
Road Usage Tax
Recreational Vehicle Tax
Sales Tax
School Tax
State Income Tax
State Unemployment Tax (SUTA)
Telephone Federal Excise Tax
Telephone Federal Universal Service Fee Tax
Telephone Federal, State and Local Surcharge Taxes
Telephone Minimum Usage Surcharge Tax
Telephone Recurring and Nonrecurring Charges Tax
Telephone State and Local Tax
Telephone Usage Charge Tax
Utility Taxes
Vehicle License Registration Tax
Vehicle Sales Tax
Watercraft Registration Tax
Well Permit Tax
Workers Compensation Tax

Not one of these taxes existed 100 years ago & our nation was the most prosperous in the world. We had absolutely no national debt, had the largest middle class in the world, and Mom stayed home to raise the kids.

What in the heck happened?  Can you spell 'politicians?'


Posted by: sickinmass at April 30, 2011 06:02 PM (1rflU)

152 Older. Type 30.

Posted by: GGE of the Moron Horde at April 30, 2011 10:58 PM (f4gk9)

Probably have to make one from scratch, which is easier than it sounds. If you can get dimensions or have one that's damaged, a decent machine shop can make one, also a good gunsmith should be able to replicate it or get dimensions off the rifle and make an over-height blade for you to cut down after you test-fire.

Too bad I never set up that prototyping machine - yet.

From the pictures at Nambu World, it looks pretty basic and easy to recreate. Should not cost much unless someone had to fiddle with it much.

Posted by: Merovign, Dark Lord of the Sith at April 30, 2011 06:03 PM (bxiXv)

153 Oh guess what I saw today as I was leaving the concert An "Obama/Clinton 2012" bumper sticker hmm...

Posted by: chemjeff at April 30, 2011 06:03 PM (qoR4D)

154 92 So Obama apparently bombed at the White House Correspondents' Dinner.

Posted by: Miss'80sBaby at April 30, 2011 10:44 PM (7isMp)

I'll offer the theory why he will always bomb at these.  First he is incredibly thin skinned and his ego makes him incapable of really making self deprecating jokes about himself which are go to jokes for things like this.  And also since no comedian ever really has made jokes about him, he has no clue as to what would work for him to talk about jokingly.

Posted by: buzzion at April 30, 2011 06:04 PM (oVQFe)

Posted by: Your Masters, GWAR! at April 30, 2011 06:05 PM (6+RxA)

156

How creepy are the Silence as compared to the Weeping Angels? The pictures look a bit creepy.

Pretty damn creepy. The plot really makes them into the "things that go bump in the night" category.

Posted by: ParanoidAnxietyGirlInSeattle at April 30, 2011 06:05 PM (RZ8pf)

157 You know what's really sad about Obama's attempts at humor?

It's almost certainly ghostwritten. Which means some of Hollywood's highest-paid, highest-status, best-parking-space comedy writers sat down to write some funny shit for the President to say . . . and this is the best they could come up with.

Posted by: Trimegistus at April 30, 2011 06:06 PM (xUJfI)

158 are they still married?

Bartender, another pitcher of mimosas, toot sweet

Posted by: Chelsea Clinton at April 30, 2011 06:07 PM (JMmQ9)

159 OK, last Phish link unless you people beg me for more.  Pearls and swine.

Phish covering Snoop Dog's Gin and Juice, bluegrass style.  Even when they cover somebody, they're original.

Posted by: FUBAR at April 30, 2011 06:07 PM (1fanL)

160 g'evening, 'rons

Posted by: AltonJackson at April 30, 2011 06:07 PM (JMmQ9)

161 I literally could not get past the *trailer* of that movie - I was so offended by the accumulated dumbness in just a couple of minutes.

As 2012 is a Roland Emmerich production, massive amounts of stupidity are to be expected and 2012 does not disappoint.  And 2012 was tailed to the Emmerich film-making formula to a "t" - lots of shit being destroyed (New York and LA are Emmerich's favorite targets), minimal emotional attachment to even the lead characters, implausible escapes, so on and so forth...

I was entertained, but then again, I'm a simple man and simple things amuse me.  There's just this strange synergy and attraction that 2012 has over me that Emmerich's other films didn't.  I'd watch 2012 any day over fucking Avatar. 

Posted by: Kratos (Ghost of Sparta) at April 30, 2011 06:08 PM (c0A3e)

162 That blowdryer ad is so hot.

Posted by: Lt. Ilia at April 30, 2011 06:08 PM (awbCy)

163

Dude. 

Phish sucks,

Posted by: garrett at April 30, 2011 06:09 PM (6+RxA)

164 I was entertained, but then again, I'm a simple man and simple things amuse me.

Posted by: Kratos (Ghost of Sparta) at April 30, 2011 11:08 PM (c0A3e)

Also, if *you* like it, there probably isn't enough decadence in it for me.

Posted by: Merovign, Dark Lord of the Sith at April 30, 2011 06:09 PM (bxiXv)

165 Lt. Ilia. Heh, heh "V-ger." The whole movie I thought she was talking about sometin' else...

Posted by: derit at April 30, 2011 06:10 PM (FQlFL)

166 167 That blowdryer ad is so hot.

Posted by: Lt. Ilia at April 30, 2011 11:08 PM (awbCy)

Man, only 128 posts late with that joke.

Posted by: Merovign, Dark Lord of the Sith at April 30, 2011 06:11 PM (bxiXv)

167 169 I was entertained, but then again, I'm a simple man and simple things amuse me.

Posted by: Kratos (Ghost of Sparta) at April 30, 2011 11:08 PM (c0A3e)

Also, if *you* like it, there probably isn't enough decadence in it for me.

 At least Independence Day had strippers.

And Adam Baldwin.

Posted by: buzzion at April 30, 2011 06:11 PM (oVQFe)

168 Also, if *you* like it, there probably isn't enough decadence in it for me.

Right you are - it's only PG-13.  The only place you may find some of the dreaded D-word is with the Russian magnate's trophy wife, but if memory serves correctly, I think she remains mostly clothed throughout the movie. 

Posted by: Kratos (Ghost of Sparta) at April 30, 2011 06:11 PM (c0A3e)

169 161 Pretty damn creepy. The plot really makes them into the "things that go bump in the night" category.

I need to watch it later, then-- though not before bed.

Posted by: Miss'80sBaby at April 30, 2011 06:12 PM (7isMp)

170

Phish sucks,

Posted by: garrett at April 30, 2011 11:09 PM (6+RxA)

So they have something in common with your mom?

Posted by: FUBAR at April 30, 2011 06:12 PM (1fanL)

171

From the pictures at Nambu World, it looks pretty basic and easy to recreate. Should not cost much unless someone had to fiddle with it much.

Posted by: Merovign, Dark Lord of the Sith at April 30, 2011 11:03 PM (bxiXv)

I'm hoping a good gunsmith can just knock the sliding part out and make a new one with a threaded post like what's on the Saiga.

Posted by: GGE of the Moron Horde at April 30, 2011 06:12 PM (f4gk9)

172 The only place you may find some of the dreaded D-word is with the Russian magnate's trophy wife, but if memory serves correctly, I think she remains mostly clothed throughout the movie.

Posted by: Kratos (Ghost of Sparta) at April 30, 2011 11:11 PM (c0A3e)

Philistines. Taliban! Edwin Meese!

Posted by: Merovign, Dark Lord of the Sith at April 30, 2011 06:14 PM (bxiXv)

173 Kratos what else has emmerich made?

Posted by: chemjeff at April 30, 2011 06:15 PM (qoR4D)

174

I need to watch it later, then-- though not before bed.

Definitely not before bed.

Posted by: ParanoidAnxietyGirlInSeattle at April 30, 2011 06:16 PM (RZ8pf)

175

I'm hoping a good gunsmith can just knock the sliding part out and make a new one with a threaded post like what's on the Saiga.

Posted by: GGE of the Moron Horde at April 30, 2011 11:12 PM (f4gk9)

Can probably cut the blade off the current one and put a threaded hole through it.

You will probably have to go with an over-height blade and trim it in either case.

Posted by: Merovign, Dark Lord of the Sith at April 30, 2011 06:16 PM (bxiXv)

176 Nothing compared to the awesomeness of Presadent Oboma !!!

Posted by: Mary Clogginstein from Brattleboro, VT and Proud that I voted for Presadent Oboma at April 30, 2011 06:17 PM (rWSsG)

177 I'll see your Roland Emmerich and raise you a Michael Bay.  Now those are some crap movies.

Posted by: Secundus at April 30, 2011 06:17 PM (t2Zxt)

178 Got some great news today.  I am one of the newest tenants here so my rent's not going up because it's not due to be raised until the end of next year.  They had raised the rent on this apartment  just before they rented it to me.  Whew!

Took me a while to get what JEF was, too.  I added "Jug Ears" to one of my favorite words, which is fuck, and voila!




Posted by: Theresa D at April 30, 2011 06:17 PM (5axVp)

179 Did anyone ask Obama how he liked the wedding?

Posted by: eman: Japanese Babe Rescue Team at April 30, 2011 06:17 PM (p2AIq)

180 Phish sucks,
Posted by: garrett at April 30, 2011 11:09 PM (6+RxA)

But they're so original!

Posted by: Scam Newton at April 30, 2011 06:18 PM (awbCy)

181 JEF is perfect. And so accurate for Toonces

Posted by: NotAMolly at April 30, 2011 06:18 PM (ADJFU)

182 Sorry, got sidetracked at 151.  Thanks Count de Monet!

Posted by: GGE of the Moron Horde at April 30, 2011 06:19 PM (f4gk9)

183

Dude. 

Phish sucks,

Posted by: garrett at April 30, 2011 11:09 PM (6+RxA)

Duh.  It's how we breath.  *rolls eyes*

Posted by: Pollock and Cod Together at last at April 30, 2011 06:19 PM (6neGz)

184 stargate

Posted by: alexthedude mobile edition at April 30, 2011 06:19 PM (SvEXB)

185 But they're so original!

Posted by: Scam Newton at April 30, 2011 11:18 PM (awbCy)

Congrats on your #1 pick.  Glad you're gonna cash in.  Again.  And yeah, that was the point.  They're original.

As you swine were.

Posted by: FUBAR at April 30, 2011 06:20 PM (1fanL)

186 Oh, my God. Oh, my God, I can't believe I shot Bill Murray

ROTFL

Posted by: 18-1 at April 30, 2011 06:20 PM (bgcml)

187 I'd like to keep the stock parts in case I ever want to put them back, so maybe I can find a replacement slide to drill and tap.

Posted by: GGE of the Moron Horde at April 30, 2011 06:20 PM (f4gk9)

188 184 Did anyone ask Obama how he liked the wedding?   So Mr. President, what did Michelle wear to the...  Wait... Never mind.

Posted by: Secundus at April 30, 2011 06:20 PM (t2Zxt)

189 " So Obama apparently bombed at the White House Correspondents' Dinner. " One of the funniest jokes that I saw come out of one of these functions was from Cheney. He referred to that scandal where Hillary Clinton said that she had been shot at in Bosnia. Cheney said that she wasn't lying, she was just confused, she hadn't been in Bosnia, she had been on a hunting trip with himself.

Posted by: nerdygirl at April 30, 2011 06:20 PM (1ckSh)

190 189 stargate

Posted by: alexthedude mobile edition at April 30, 2011 11:19 PM (SvEXB)

Roland Emmerich made the Stargate movie.

In case anyone wondered what question that was answering.

Posted by: Merovign, Dark Lord of the Sith at April 30, 2011 06:21 PM (bxiXv)

191 FUBAR, can I take my dick out of your ass yet?  I've just got a hot new gig and have things to do....

Posted by: Scam Newton at April 30, 2011 06:21 PM (awbCy)

192 So Mr. President, what did Michelle wear to the... Wait... Never mind. Posted by: Secundus at April 30, 2011 11:20 PM (t2Zxt) It would have been nice to have Prince Philip and his lovely bride join the festivities by satellite video. "Terribly sorry we can't be there in person, Old Boy. You know how it is." Then they high-five each other and cut the feed.

Posted by: eman: Japanese Babe Rescue Team at April 30, 2011 06:23 PM (p2AIq)

193 Yeah, the jokes are supposed to be gently self-deprecating. Making fun of YOURSELF. And of course instead the asshole in chief decides it's the perfect time for some fifth-grade insults aimed at his enemies, or anyone who is a potential enemy.

And you just know the MFM (once they wash out their mouths) will be eagerly pounding out stories about Obama's wit, eloquence, and folksy good humor.

Posted by: Trimegistus at April 30, 2011 06:24 PM (xUJfI)

194

Roland Emmerich made the Stargate movie.

Got into a not-very-serious argument with a coworker recently, who insisted that Kurt Russel movies were by definition not B flicks.  He held his own until Escape from New York was mentioned...

Posted by: Secundus at April 30, 2011 06:24 PM (t2Zxt)

195 Phish covering Snoop Dog's Gin and Juice, bluegrass style.  Even when they cover somebody, they're original.

Posted by: FUBAR at April 30, 2011 11:07 PM (1fanL)

Dude, seriously? Fuck you!

Posted by: The Gourds at April 30, 2011 06:25 PM (LZTNd)

Posted by: HeatherRadish, still drinking at April 30, 2011 06:26 PM (0vDuM)

197 Got into a not-very-serious argument with a coworker recently, who insisted that Kurt Russel movies were by definition not B flicks.

Does your coworker have a newsletter by any chance?

Posted by: The Computer Wore Tennis Shoes at April 30, 2011 06:26 PM (awbCy)

198 178 Kratos what else has emmerich made?

Uh, from the top of my head:  Independence Day, Godzilla, The Patriot, The Day After Tomorrow.

Basically, if you've seen one Emmerich movie, you've seen them all - he has a very specific formula that he follows for virtually all his movies.

Posted by: Kratos (Ghost of Sparta) at April 30, 2011 06:27 PM (y/ip2)

199 The Patriot

The good on or the bad one?

Posted by: 18-1 at April 30, 2011 06:27 PM (bgcml)

200 187 Sorry, got sidetracked at 151.  Thanks Count de Monet!

Posted by: GGE of the Moron Horde at April 30, 2011 11:19 PM (f4gk9)

Yer welcome.  Just wanted to give back.

Posted by: Count de Monet at April 30, 2011 06:27 PM (XBM1t)

201 164 Phish covering Snoop Dog's Gin and Juice, bluegrass style.  Even when they cover somebody, they're original.

That's not Phish. No one in Phish sounds like that.

Posted by: Splunge at April 30, 2011 06:28 PM (2IW5Q)

202 Does your coworker have a newsletter by any chance? Posted by: The Computer Wore Tennis Shoes at April 30, 2011 11:26 PM (awbCy) I see our derangement waves are in phase. That movie came to my mind, too.

Posted by: eman: Japanese Babe Rescue Team at April 30, 2011 06:28 PM (p2AIq)

203

Got into a not-very-serious argument with a coworker recently, who insisted that Kurt Russel movies were by definition not B flicks. He held his own until Escape from New York was mentioned...

Posted by: Secundus at April 30, 2011 11:24 PM (t2Zxt)

Escape from New York was not a "B" flick, I think I can demonstrate that if I need to. It was major-market, properly advertised, and carried a consistent mood, and Kurt was not the only A-lister present (that may be a question of timing).

Escape from LA was like a F-, though.

BTLC was a parody/spoof and by definition not B-list.

Of course, I'm in film-critic talk-out-your-ass mode now.

Posted by: Merovign, Dark Lord of the Sith at April 30, 2011 06:28 PM (bxiXv)

204 Demotivational Boobs  (previewtinyurl.com) NSFW, unless your work is a garage with tool cutie calendars everywhere. Posted by: Count de Monet at April 30, 2011 11:00 PM (XBM1t) False advertising: there was nothing DE-motivational about those pics.

Posted by: stuiec at April 30, 2011 06:28 PM (jHRBb)

205 Yeah, the jokes are supposed to be gently self-deprecating. Making fun of YOURSELF.

But, let me be clear, there's, uh,  nothing to make, um,  fun of.  I'm, uh, completely  awesome, as I have said before! I heal, um,  the sick, let me be clear, and slow *pause* the rise of the oceans and look, you know, hawt doing it,

Posted by: Barry O at April 30, 2011 06:29 PM (0vDuM)

206 Video: Obama Hits Trump At the WH Correspondents Dinner

Posted by: newser at April 30, 2011 06:29 PM (nfBYf)

207

Does your coworker have a newsletter by any chance?

No, but he has a "Veterans for Obama" bumper sticker on his truck, and he loves Rachel Maddow.

Not that bears any relation to his cinematic tastes, you know, I'm just saying.

Posted by: Secundus at April 30, 2011 06:29 PM (t2Zxt)

208 Adrienne Barbeau's glorious rack would never grace a B-flick. Dammit "Swamp Thing" deserved and Oscar!

Posted by: derit at April 30, 2011 06:30 PM (FQlFL)

209 Kratos @ 203 dude this is me you're talking about - I had no idea those movies had the same director

Posted by: chemjeff at April 30, 2011 06:30 PM (qoR4D)

210 Nashville has just tied it with Vancouver, 1-1. 


Bruins looked great today. 

Posted by: Y-not at April 30, 2011 06:30 PM (pW2o8)

211 @213
She's referred to as Adrienne Boobeau in Casa Y-not. 

Posted by: Y-not at April 30, 2011 06:31 PM (pW2o8)

212 213 Adrienne Barbeau's glorious rack would never grace a B-flick. Dammit "Swamp Thing" deserved and Oscar!

They actually showed Swamp Thing in one of my high school classes believe it or not, i can't remember why. I've always wondered if the teacher knew Barbeau's tata's were going to make an appearance.

Posted by: booger at April 30, 2011 06:32 PM (9RFH1)

213 " So Obama apparently bombed at the White House Correspondents' Dinner. "

It seemed to me like a hit on Trump. Obama ridiculed him quite a bit and it clearly was enjoying it. Then they had Seth Myers do an absolute hatchet-job on Trump, including calling him a racist, of course.

Posted by: The Notion at April 30, 2011 06:33 PM (hD0CU)

214 Frank Zappa ... as original as can be

 Cod is good Phish

Posted by: melvin at April 30, 2011 06:33 PM (3OCZw)

215 204 The Patriot

The good on or the bad one?

lol, the "good one". 

/Kudos to you (or shame) that you know about that Steven Seagal POS (BIRM) "The Patriot". 

Posted by: Kratos (Ghost of Sparta) at April 30, 2011 06:34 PM (c0A3e)

216 stueic, I think the 3 boobed woman was fairly de-motivating.

Posted by: ParanoidAnxietyGirlInSeattle at April 30, 2011 06:34 PM (RZ8pf)

217 So Obama apparently bombed at the White House Correspondents' Dinner.

Considering Wanda Sykes called for Rush Limbaugh kidney failure at the JEF's very first of these I'm not sure what else we expect at this point....

Posted by: The War Between the Undead States at April 30, 2011 06:35 PM (awbCy)

218 Wait, there's a good Patriot? 

Posted by: Secundus at April 30, 2011 06:36 PM (t2Zxt)

219 Kirby Ferguson is completely full of shit. Page and Plant should sue him and then sell him.

Posted by: FlaviusJulius at April 30, 2011 06:36 PM (qIHlG)

220 Did I just drink myself back in time? Wayne's World's on SNL.

Posted by: derit at April 30, 2011 06:37 PM (FQlFL)

221 It seemed to me like a hit on Trump. Obama ridiculed him quite a bit and it he clearly was enjoying it. Then they had Seth Myers do an absolute hatchet-job on Trump, including calling him a racist, of course.

Posted by: The Notion at April 30, 2011 11:33 PM (hD0CU)


FIFM

Posted by: The Notion at April 30, 2011 06:37 PM (hD0CU)

222 I think the 3 boobed woman was fairly de-motivating.

She sure was for me!

Posted by: Benny the Cab Driver at April 30, 2011 06:37 PM (awbCy)

223 214 Kratos @ 203 dude this is me you're talking about - I had no idea those movies had the same director

Well, now you know.    And to be honest, I didn't know for a long time that these movies had the same director either. 

btw, Adam Baldwin was also in The Patriot - he was the Captain of the Loyalist Militia. 

Posted by: Kratos (Ghost of Sparta) at April 30, 2011 06:37 PM (c0A3e)

224 Wow so I'm sitting at the bar and there are two chicks to my left and two chicks to my right

Posted by: chemjeff at April 30, 2011 06:38 PM (qoR4D)

225 Here's a great Anime series that is not safe for Kratos. Rin: Daughters of Mnemosyne: The Complete Series

Posted by: eman: Japanese Babe Rescue Team at April 30, 2011 06:38 PM (p2AIq)

226 Full video, Obama @ WHCD

Apparently, Seth Meyers was brutal but he at least made jokes about the Dems (albeit weak ones).

Posted by: Miss'80sBaby at April 30, 2011 06:38 PM (7isMp)

227 @229
Is there a priest, a minister, and a rabbi there, too? 

(sorry, your post sounded like the start to a bar joke)

Posted by: Y-not at April 30, 2011 06:39 PM (pW2o8)

228 Our copyright laws are bullshit. That is why the world rejects them universally.

Posted by: FlaviusJulius at April 30, 2011 06:40 PM (qIHlG)

229 Wow so I'm sitting at the bar and there are two chicks to my left and two chicks to my right

Posted by: chemjeff at April 30, 2011 11:38 PM (qoR4D)

That's not the bar chemjeff. That's the henhouse.  Get out of there.

Posted by: GGE of the Moron Horde at April 30, 2011 06:40 PM (f4gk9)

230 229 Wow so I'm sitting at the bar and there are two chicks to my left and two chicks to my right

And here we are stuck in the middle with you.

Posted by: Steelers Wheel at April 30, 2011 06:41 PM (9RFH1)

231 AT least we know that Trump isn't afraid to hit  back.  If the JEF pissed the Donald off then next week may be great for entertainment value.   

Posted by: someone at April 30, 2011 06:41 PM (bqjJT)

232 chemjeff,
If you are still considering jazzing up your "look" you might consider that monkey beard idea. 

Posted by: Y-not at April 30, 2011 06:41 PM (pW2o8)

233 230 Here's a great Anime series that is not safe for Kratos.

Rin: Daughters of Mnemosyne: The Complete Series

Posted by: eman: Japanese Babe Rescue Team at April 30, 2011 11:38 PM (p2AIq)

That's an awesome series.  And yeah, it's pretty... raw.

Posted by: Ace's liver at April 30, 2011 06:42 PM (QgI7g)

234

Posted by: chemjeff at April 30, 2011 11:38 PM (qoR4D)

Ask them if they can do the Hooter's girl bar trick. If they're the type of chicks that have a taste for Ace of Spades, they may be keepers...

Posted by: Canadian Infidel at April 30, 2011 06:42 PM (GKQDR)

235 Who is that GUY?

Posted by: Chick #3 at April 30, 2011 06:43 PM (awbCy)

236 Outta the way, bitches!  He's mine!

Posted by: Hello Kitty at April 30, 2011 06:43 PM (awbCy)

237 229 Wow so I'm sitting at the bar and there are two chicks to my left and two chicks to my right

Some would envy you, .  Bask in your newfound glory. 

Posted by: Kratos (Ghost of Sparta) at April 30, 2011 06:43 PM (c0A3e)

238 I liked "The Patriot" the first time I saw it...when it was called "Braveheart."

Posted by: Duke Lowell at April 30, 2011 06:43 PM (EzcZC)

239 The thread is loading slowly for me - sort of sporadically slowly.  Gets hung up on something called "moonsighting.com" or something.


Anyhoo, I saw this in the liquor store today. 

Posted by: Y-not at April 30, 2011 06:46 PM (pW2o8)

240 Steelers wheel?

Posted by: chemjeff at April 30, 2011 06:47 PM (SFn+m)

241 Shorpy> Saturday in the Park: 1905
"Onondaga County, New York, circa 1905. 'Long Branch Park, Syracuse.' The the right, a banner advertising "moving pictures." 8x10 glass neg."


The DM: Touching tribute from a Royal bride: Kate's bouquet returns to Westminster Abbey to lie on the grave of the unknown soldier
The Queen Mother started this tradition in honor of her brother, who died in combat in WWI.

Posted by: Miss'80sBaby at April 30, 2011 06:48 PM (7isMp)

242 AT least we know that Trump isn't afraid to hit  back.  If the JEF pissed the Donald off then next week may be great for entertainment value.   

Posted by: someone at April 30, 2011 11:41 PM (bqjJT)

I watched it, Trump had a few weak smiles while Obama was attacking him, he looked like a stone cold killer when Meyers started on him. Trump I think will hit back hard, he looked like he was already plotting it.

Posted by: robtr at April 30, 2011 06:48 PM (MtwBb)

243 Ok, Zombieland was pretty good.

And I didn't hate Woody Harrelson.

Posted by: 18-1 at April 30, 2011 06:50 PM (bgcml)

244 221 stueic, I think the 3 boobed woman was fairly de-motivating. Posted by: ParanoidAnxietyGirlInSeattle at April 30, 2011 11:34 PM (RZ8pf) Funny, I thought she was supposed to represent an aspirational ideal. The clown chick, on the other hand....

Posted by: stuiec at April 30, 2011 06:50 PM (jHRBb)

245 Stealers wheel?

Posted by: chemjeff at April 30, 2011 11:47 PM (SFn+m)

A band. They did a song called "Stuck In The Middle With You"

Posted by: GGE of the Moron Horde at April 30, 2011 06:51 PM (f4gk9)

246 Why was Trump at the dinner, anyway? 

Is it traditional for them to invite major donors?  heh

Posted by: Y-not at April 30, 2011 06:51 PM (pW2o8)

247 Our copyright laws are bullshit. That is why the world rejects them universally.

Posted by: FlaviusJulius at April 30, 2011 11:40 PM (qIHlG)

And this is another area where if the Republicans were smart, they could wreak some vengeance.

If Hollywood is going to keep going all in the on the left, give them a 10 year copyright.

Posted by: 18-1 at April 30, 2011 06:52 PM (bgcml)

248

 they have something in common with your mom?

Surprise!  A Phish fan that can't find an original insult.  Isn't there a Frat mixer somewhere in need of a Date Rapist? 

Posted by: garrett at April 30, 2011 06:52 PM (6+RxA)

249 The clown chick, on the other hand....

Posted by: stuiec at April 30, 2011 11:50 PM (jHRBb)

Yeah, she was disturbing.  The cowgirls chick, on the other hand...

Posted by: Count de Monet at April 30, 2011 06:53 PM (XBM1t)

250 Wow so I'm sitting at the bar and there are two chicks to my left and two chicks to my right

Posted by: chemjeff at April 30, 2011 11:38 PM (qoR4D)

Breathe. 

Posted by: Papa Editor at April 30, 2011 06:53 PM (6neGz)

251 Hmm monkey beard Last time I tried to grow a beard I looked like a hillbilly from western west virginia Plus it tool forever to grow No thanx

Posted by: chemjeff at April 30, 2011 06:53 PM (SFn+m)

252

I watched it, Trump had a few weak smiles while Obama was attacking him, he looked like a stone cold killer when Meyers started on him. Trump I think will hit back hard, he looked like he was already plotting it.

Posted by: robtr at April 30, 2011 11:48 PM (MtwBb)


Right. And the thing that stood out was how much Obama was enjoying humiliating someone who was in no position to respond. Big surprise there.

Posted by: The Notion at April 30, 2011 06:53 PM (hD0CU)

253 Trump had a few weak smiles while Obama was attacking him, he looked like a stone cold killer when Meyers started on him. Trump I think will hit back hard, he looked like he was already plotting it.

Posted by: robtr

It's not personal.  It's just business.

Posted by: Michael Corleone, now Trump's campaign manager at April 30, 2011 06:54 PM (sJTmU)

254 Clowns to the left of me
Jokers to the right

Posted by: Papa Editor at April 30, 2011 06:54 PM (6neGz)

255 Wow so I'm sitting at the bar and there are two chicks to my left and two chicks to my right Posted by: chemjeff at April 30, 2011 11:38 PM (qoR4D) What's the tactical situation? Can you penetrate their defense grid?

Posted by: eman: Japanese Babe Rescue Team at April 30, 2011 06:54 PM (p2AIq)

256 I watched it, Trump had a few weak smiles while Obama was attacking him, he looked like a stone cold killer when Meyers started on him. Trump I think will hit back hard, he looked like he was already plotting it.

I couldn't even think of watching it.  If I hear 10 words out of teh Won's mouth I'm bordering on breaking something.   But, I'm glad to hear that we may see retaliation in the future.  

Posted by: someone at April 30, 2011 06:55 PM (bqjJT)

257

Right. And the thing that stood out was how much Obama was enjoying humiliating someone who was in no position to respond. Big surprise there.

Posted by: The Notion at April 30, 2011 11:53 PM (hD0CU)

Just like the SOTU address.  He's a cowardly bully.

Posted by: Count de Monet at April 30, 2011 06:55 PM (XBM1t)

258

It's not personal.  It's just business.

Posted by: Michael Corleone, now Trump's campaign manager

---

Michelle better watch out or she'll lose her head. 

Posted by: Y-not at April 30, 2011 06:56 PM (pW2o8)

259 Anyhow, I saw this in the liquor store today.  Posted by: Y-not at April 30, 2011 11:46 PM (pW2o Nice! My daughter works in Sebastopol - now I know what to request for Father's Day!

Posted by: stuiec at April 30, 2011 06:57 PM (jHRBb)

260 Tom, come here.  Mr. Trump wants you to go over and see Eric Holder next week.  I have an offer for him that he won't be able to refuse.

Posted by: Michael Corleone, now Trump's campaign manager at April 30, 2011 06:57 PM (sJTmU)

Posted by: Y-not at April 30, 2011 06:58 PM (pW2o8)

262 What's the tactical situation?

Can you penetrate their defense grid?

He'll likely need support for such a maneuver.  The Romans would approve of this advice - divide and conquer.

Chemjeff, are you there with anybody you know? 

Posted by: Kratos (Ghost of Sparta) at April 30, 2011 06:59 PM (ESrfn)

263 Yeah, she was disturbing.  The cowgirls chick, on the other hand... Posted by: Count de Monet at April 30, 2011 11:53 PM (XBM1t) Like a matched pair of Western saddles.

Posted by: stuiec at April 30, 2011 06:59 PM (jHRBb)

264

Right. And the thing that stood out was how much Obama was enjoying humiliating someone who was in no position to respond. Big surprise there.

Posted by: The Notion at April 30, 2011 11:53 PM (hD0CU)

The ignorant punk is completely clueless about how he's getting exposed as exactly what he is.  He can't help but sink to any occasion when somebody calls his pansy ass out.  He's on his way to a complete meltdown, which would've happened earlier if the Republican party wasn't a bunch of gelded eunuchs.

Posted by: Captain Hate at April 30, 2011 07:01 PM (vEVry)

265 LOL IMHO

Posted by: Y-not

Sounds like a BFD.

True story.

 

ZZZZzzzzZZZZzzzz........

Posted by: Joe Biden at April 30, 2011 07:01 PM (sJTmU)

266

If Hollywood is going to keep going all in the on the left, give them a 10 year copyright.

Posted by: 18-1 at April 30, 2011 11:52 PM (bgcml)

I LOVE that idea. Seriously.

The media also needs to be destroyed.

Posted by: Canadian Infidel at April 30, 2011 07:01 PM (GKQDR)

267 I couldn't even think of watching it.  If I hear 10 words out of teh Won's mouth I'm bordering on breaking something.   But, I'm glad to hear that we may see retaliation in the future.  

Posted by: someone at April 30, 2011 11:55 PM (bqjJT)

It was worth watching just to see how bad Obama sucked. I despise the guy but that's not why I am saying it. He really sucked, he got very few laughs even out of his press adoration society. His opening birth certificate video was terrible, no body laughed.

Meyers was funny at times, his bit on Trump was just outright hatred and at his close I thought he was just going to go ahead an suck Obama's dick. 

Posted by: robtr at April 30, 2011 07:01 PM (MtwBb)

268 Hey Obama: Leave the White House- take Michelle, the kids, the dog, and the cannoli

Posted by: Clemenza at April 30, 2011 07:01 PM (7wmOW)

269 I see a horsehead in someone's bed in the near future...

Posted by: ParanoidAnxietyGirlInSeattle at April 30, 2011 07:01 PM (RZ8pf)

270 Can you penetrate their defense grid?

Negative, negative.... it didn't go in..... just impacted on the surface....

Posted by: Red Leader at April 30, 2011 07:02 PM (awbCy)

271

Posted by: Captain Hate at May 01, 2011 12:01 AM (vEVry)

Let's not go around insulting gelded eunuchs by comparing them to the Republican party. For many in the Republican party, 'gelded eunuch' is an aspirational goal.

Posted by: Canadian Infidel at April 30, 2011 07:03 PM (GKQDR)

272 229 Wow so I'm sitting at the bar and there are two chicks to my left and two chicks to my right Posted by: chemjeff at April 30, 2011 11:38 PM (qoR4D) Well, my cat is lying on my bed next to me. So we're even on nipples, but I'm behind 4-1 on pussy....

Posted by: stuiec at April 30, 2011 07:03 PM (jHRBb)

273 You know what makes me feel old? Running across a video on You tube that has 55 million views and i've never heard of the person.

Posted by: Steelers Wheel at April 30, 2011 07:03 PM (9RFH1)

274 Negative, negative.... it didn't go in..... just impacted on the surface.... Posted by: Red Leader at May 01, 2011 12:02 AM (awbCy) Premature... ah I just keep thinking of Willie Mays sliding into home and everything works out fine

Posted by: nevergiveup at April 30, 2011 07:03 PM (7wmOW)

275 Trump should catch him outside in the parking lot.  Film at 5.

Posted by: GGE of the Moron Horde at April 30, 2011 07:05 PM (f4gk9)

276 He's on his way to a complete meltdown, which would've happened earlier if the Republican party wasn't a bunch of gelded eunuchs.

Posted by: Captain Hate

I hear that John Boehner likes show tunes, too! 

Posted by: Ezra Klein at April 30, 2011 07:06 PM (sJTmU)

277 Now I remember something interesting about 2012 - Roland Emmerich pussed out and didn't show any Muslim holy sites being destroyed.   Guess he didn't want a fatwa on his head.


Posted by: Kratos (Ghost of Sparta) at April 30, 2011 07:07 PM (ESrfn)

278 No one wants to win this hockey game (NSH v VAN). 

Posted by: Y-not at April 30, 2011 07:08 PM (pW2o8)

279

Negative, negative.... it didn't go in..... just impacted on the surface....
Posted by: Red Leader at May 01, 2011 12:02 AM (awbCy)

Must. Disarm. Perimeter. Defenses.

Posted by: Count de Monet at April 30, 2011 07:08 PM (XBM1t)

280 Guess he didn't want a fatwa on his head.


Posted by: Kratos

Well that's a silly place to put a fatwa!

Posted by: Ezra Klein at April 30, 2011 07:09 PM (sJTmU)

281 Chemjeff, are you there with anybody you know?

no - and I've left and now I'm at home

Posted by: chemjeff at April 30, 2011 07:10 PM (7mSYS)

282 Premature... ah I just keep thinking of Willie Mays sliding into home and everything works out fine Posted by: nevergiveup at May 01, 2011 12:03 AM (7wmOW) I just think of Willie Mays and that amazing one-handed play....

Posted by: stuiec at April 30, 2011 07:10 PM (jHRBb)

283 no - and I've left and now I'm at home

Posted by: chemjeff at May 01, 2011 12:10 AM (7mSYS)

You might want to rethink going home when you are surrounded by women, just sayin.

Posted by: robtr at April 30, 2011 07:12 PM (MtwBb)

284 no - and I've left and now I'm at home

Posted by: chemjeff at May 01, 2011 12:10 AM (7mSYS)

Uh, wut?

Posted by: Papa Editor at April 30, 2011 07:13 PM (6neGz)

285 Sir, we just got word chemjeff's boyfriend sensors have all gone off-line. He's going in blind. Dammit! Wish him luck, soldier! Yes, Sir.

Posted by: eman: Japanese Babe Rescue Team at April 30, 2011 07:14 PM (p2AIq)

286 wut wut?

Posted by: chemjeff at April 30, 2011 07:14 PM (7mSYS)

287

Posted by: Kratos (Ghost of Sparta) at May 01, 2011 12:07 AM (ESrfn)

I remember that. He pretty much came out and said it really wasn't worth angering the Muslims just to have the one scene in the movie.

Personally, I hope he'll get the video scenes someday. Preferably a very long documentary.

Posted by: Canadian Infidel at April 30, 2011 07:15 PM (GKQDR)

288 Home alone? And not carrying chloroform and rag at all times? Geez, somebody didn't finish the Polanski School for Gentleman!

Posted by: derit at April 30, 2011 07:15 PM (FQlFL)

289 derit lol sorry, left the chloroform in the lab

Posted by: chemjeff at April 30, 2011 07:15 PM (7mSYS)

290 ALMOST THERE.....

Posted by: Red Leader at April 30, 2011 07:16 PM (awbCy)

291 Hey Editor and robtr, you heard the ESPN rumor that Hasselback is going to be out as our QB? Oh, that it will be true.

Posted by: ParanoidAnxietyGirlInSeattle at April 30, 2011 07:16 PM (RZ8pf)

292 Well, 290 was wasted. Maybe next Friday.

Posted by: eman: Japanese Babe Rescue Team at April 30, 2011 07:16 PM (p2AIq)

293 Let's see her try that with a pack of honey badgers instead of cheetahs.

Posted by: Ostral B Heretic at April 30, 2011 07:17 PM (TprD1)

294 CHEMJEFF!  GET BACK IN THERE AND GET SET UP FOR YOUR ATTACK RU---

YEAAAARRRRGGHHH!!!!

Posted by: Red Leader at April 30, 2011 07:17 PM (awbCy)

295 maybe not, eman
me, picking up a chick at a bar?  the very thought is inconceivable

Posted by: chemjeff at April 30, 2011 07:18 PM (7mSYS)

296 Hey Editor and robtr, you heard the ESPN rumor that Hasselback is going to be out as our QB? Oh, that it will be true.

Posted by: ParanoidAnxietyGirlInSeattle at May 01, 2011 12:16 AM (RZ8pf)

Yeah, that's the rumor. There is an article in the times but I didn't read it. I kind of like hasselback except he acts like a pussy everytime he gets tackled. Of course I would act like a corpse if those guys tackled me.

Posted by: robtr at April 30, 2011 07:19 PM (MtwBb)

297 maybe not, eman me, picking up a chick at a bar? the very thought is inconceivable Posted by: chemjeff at May 01, 2011 12:18 AM (7mSYS) and yoda sighed

Posted by: eman: Japanese Babe Rescue Team at April 30, 2011 07:19 PM (p2AIq)

Posted by: Red Leader at April 30, 2011 07:19 PM (awbCy)

299 Of course I would act like a corpse if those guys tackled me.

then again, I'm guessing you aren't 6'4", 225 lbs, and can bench press a horse

Posted by: chemjeff at April 30, 2011 07:20 PM (7mSYS)

300

Great horny toads, man.  Just talk to them.

 

 

 

 

 

Says the hermit/recluse who avoids "outside" people

Posted by: Count de Monet at April 30, 2011 07:20 PM (XBM1t)

301

No, you say it like this...

INCONCEIVABLE!

Posted by: Some Sicilian Genius at April 30, 2011 07:20 PM (sJTmU)

302 maybe not, eman
me, picking up a chick at a bar?  the very thought is inconceivable

Posted by: chemjeff at May 01, 2011 12:18 AM (7mSYS)

Chemjeff, maybe next time there will be two girls standing behind you as well and then you will have to talk to them. Tell them you are new in town, your a professor and you're trying to make some friends. They don't bite really, unless you find a good one.

Posted by: robtr at April 30, 2011 07:21 PM (MtwBb)

303

I used to like Hasselback, but then he acted like he was imbued with some magical powers and would never actually accomplish the right play at the right time. Now I know QBs are arrogant SOBs, but Hasselback never actually was useful with his arrogance. He always did the safe play.

I mean for God's sake, one season the feakin kicker ran for more yardage in a game than Hasselback did.

Posted by: ParanoidAnxietyGirlInSeattle at April 30, 2011 07:21 PM (RZ8pf)

304 I'm not sure girls in bars are the best target for chemjeff.

Posted by: ParanoidAnxietyGirlInSeattle at April 30, 2011 07:23 PM (RZ8pf)

305 then again, I'm guessing you aren't 6'4", 225 lbs, and can bench press a horse

Posted by: chemjeff at May 01, 2011 12:20 AM (7mSYS)

Heh no, I am tall enough but gosh darnit I am just not strong enough anymore.

Posted by: robtr at April 30, 2011 07:23 PM (MtwBb)

306 wut wut?

Posted by: chemjeff at May 01, 2011 12:14 AM (7mSYS)

In the butt butt?

Posted by: Papa Editor at April 30, 2011 07:24 PM (6neGz)

307
>>Trump should catch him outside in the parking lot.


There is so much for Trump to get even with. Here's an example:

There is evidence that high-ranking Democrat Party officials conspired to cover up for Obama. Congress has refused to address the subject, and the Supreme Court of the United States has evaded the issue. Their dereliction leaves the doubt Constitutionally unresolved, so that every military officer, and indeed every citizen of the United States, can have no certainty as to the Constitutionality of any action performed by Barack Obama when he claims to wield the executive power of the U.S. government.

Pelosi created two separate and distinctly different certifications of Obama's eligibility! This is a fraud that may be repeated in 2012.

Recently available documents indicate Nancy Pelosi was aware of Obama's eligibility problems, and very likely complicit in defrauding the election officials in all 50 states. Typically, only one standard nomination certification form exists – exact duplicates of which are provided to the DNC and state election authorities. However, that was not the case on August 28, 2008. On that day, Pelosi created, signed and had notarized two completely different certifications. The first, which was provided to the Democratic National Committee, states Barack Obama and Joe Biden "are legally qualified to serve under the provisions of the United States Constitution." But the certification provided to the states omitted that line entirely. The fact that both copies were certified on the same date, by the same notary and both signed by Nancy Pelosi suggests Pelosi was clearly aware of Obama's ineligibility and acted with a clear intent to mislead state election officials.

In contrast, there is only ONE version of the Republican National Committee candidate certification, and it was delivered to the election officials in all 50 states. The RNC certification clearly stated that both John McCain and Sarah Palin met the "Constitutional requirements" for their respective nominated positions.

It has come to light that the Hawaiian Democratic Party REFUSED to certify Obama as eligible. Unlike years past, when the HDP included eligibility language on its nomination certification, they removed such language from their 2008 certification signaling to the DNC their clear refusal to certify Obama's eligibility. As a result, DNC Attorney Joseph Sandler brought a different certification to the Hawaii elections office, not of the HDP's creation, which added eligibility language. Reportedly, the only state election office to receive Pelosi's amended certifications, (containing the eligibility language), was Hawaii. This made it appear to Hawaiian election officials that someone somewhere (at the national party level) had found and confirmed Barack Obama's birth certificate, and Hawaii could presume to qualify him for the state ballot on that basis. But apparently, there was no evidence to support their presumption.

The Hawaii Department of Health has confirmed to various sources that neither Nancy Pelosi nor Alice Germond, (the certification signatories), nor any leader of either the Hawaiian Democratic Party or Democratic National Committee ever asked to see Obama's birth certificate prior to certification or the election.

The fact that two very different DNC Certifications exist and were variously distributed, each signed, dated and notarized by the same people on the same date, means that a very real and apparently very successful conspiracy to commit election fraud took place under Pelosi's own hand.

The usurper Barack Obama and his political machine have nearly complete control over the MFM which fights every day to keep evidence such as this  out of the public eye.

Posted by: sickinmass covering his nuts from Dumb_Blond at April 30, 2011 07:24 PM (1rflU)

308 I always love the #nerdprom.  It just reaffirms how much the President of my United States despises everything I stand for.  Other than that, it was a good lesson that if I want to be belittled and scorned, I should call my ex-husband instead. 

Posted by: sybilll at April 30, 2011 07:24 PM (ykJls)

309 I'm not sure girls in bars are the best target for chemjeff.

Posted by: ParanoidAnxietyGirlInSeattle at May 01, 2011 12:23 AM (RZ8pf)

There is nothing about what you just said that I understand.

Posted by: robtr at April 30, 2011 07:25 PM (MtwBb)

310 I'm not getting my hopes up about Hasselbeck until I see it with my own eyes.

*Gets on knees* Lord, may it be your will.  Amen.

Posted by: Papa Editor at April 30, 2011 07:26 PM (6neGz)

311 267 What's the tactical situation?

Can you penetrate their defense grid?

He'll likely need support for such a maneuver.  The Romans would approve of this advice - divide and conquer.

Chemjeff, are you there with anybody you know? 

Posted by: Kratos (Ghost of Sparta) at April 30, 2011 11:59 PM (ESrfn)

Pick up advice from a comedian I saw on Comedy Central last night.  Buy their next drink and go "drink this until I start looking cute"

Posted by: buzzion at April 30, 2011 07:27 PM (oVQFe)

312

There is nothing about what you just said that I understand.

Posted by: robtr at May 01, 2011 12:25 AM (MtwBb)

Oh, good.  It wasn't just me.  At first, I thought it was in French.

Posted by: Papa Editor at April 30, 2011 07:27 PM (6neGz)

313

*Gets on knees*

 

Now who's the bottom feeder?

Posted by: a Carp at April 30, 2011 07:27 PM (6+RxA)

314

Negative, negative.... it didn't go in..... just impacted on the surface....
Posted by: Red Leader at May 01, 2011 12:02 AM (awbCy)

Must. Disarm. Perimeter. Defenses.

Posted by: Count de Monet at May 01, 2011 12:08 AM (XBM1t)

No, you have to get down in the trench to get past the defenses.

Posted by: Merovign, Dark Lord of the Sith at April 30, 2011 07:27 PM (bxiXv)

315 Shut up, SiM!  What are you trying to do, make us look like kooks?

Posted by: Conservatives Who Trust a Lying President Implicitly Over the Past He's Covering Up at April 30, 2011 07:27 PM (awbCy)

316 Tonight's ONT brought to you by a creepy ad from the past:

She's BALD!

Posted by: George Costanza at April 30, 2011 07:27 PM (vdfwz)

317 Oh come on, chemjeff is a nice cuddly chemistry professor who is somewhat shy. Girls in bars would devour him, and not in the good way.

Posted by: ParanoidAnxietyGirlInSeattle at April 30, 2011 07:28 PM (RZ8pf)

318

No, you say it like this...

INCONCEIVABLE!

Posted by: Some Sicilian Genius at May 01, 2011 12:20 AM (sJTmU)

You keep saying this word...

Posted by: Inigo Montoya at April 30, 2011 07:29 PM (f4gk9)

319 Posted by: sickinmass covering his nuts from Dumb_Blond at May 01, 2011 12:24 AM (1rflU)

They're trying to invalidate eligibility requirements by precedent.

Because they're traitors.

Posted by: Merovign, Dark Lord of the Sith at April 30, 2011 07:29 PM (bxiXv)

320 OK, stare at the dot in the center of this picture and then move your head towards your screen or away. What do you see?

I think I see a spaceship now!

Posted by: Justman Pitt at April 30, 2011 07:29 PM (vdfwz)

321

No, you have to get down in the trench to get past the defenses.

Posted by: Merovign, Dark Lord of the Sith at May 01, 2011 12:27 AM (bxiXv)

Aannnnd he lets it hang over the plate.  On purpose?

Posted by: Count de Monet at April 30, 2011 07:30 PM (XBM1t)

322 296 Hey Editor and robtr, you heard the ESPN rumor that Hasselback is going to be out as our QB? Oh, that it will be true.

Posted by: ParanoidAnxietyGirlInSeattle at May 01, 2011 12:16 AM (RZ8pf)

I'm willing to bet there's some truth to the rumor.  And you can also expect a certain scenario to come about.  Your coach is Peter Carrol.  Former coach of USC.  There is a former USC quarterback by the name of Carson Palmer that wants out of Cincinnatti.  The Bengals did draft a quarterback many expect to end up playing this year.

So as soon as the lockout is all resolved and free agency can happen, expect a Palmer to Seattle rumors to fly.

Posted by: buzzion at April 30, 2011 07:30 PM (oVQFe)

323 322 Oh come on, chemjeff is a nice cuddly chemistry professor who is somewhat shy. Girls in bars would devour him, and not in the good way.

Posted by: ParanoidAnxietyGirlInSeattle at May 01, 2011 12:28 AM (RZ8pf)

They really like that sour tang of chloroethane..

Posted by: TexasJew at April 30, 2011 07:30 PM (uR5Zf)

324 Decker -- Unit!  Even -- if -- you -- can't -- use -- it -- it's -- fun -- to -- have!

Posted by: Lt. Ilia at April 30, 2011 07:31 PM (awbCy)

325 PGiS might be right.

A friend of mine just called me the other day from Mexico.  He'd been stuck there for that last 7-days... because he'd fallen of the lanai of his hotel room... 6-stories up.  Lucky bastard landed on the only patch of grass (less than 16 square feet) around.  Broke his back and leg.

Anyway, he'd been roofied.  I can tell you it wasn't his first rodeo, so it can happen to anyone.

Posted by: Papa Editor at April 30, 2011 07:32 PM (6neGz)

326 322 Oh come on, chemjeff is a nice cuddly chemistry professor who is somewhat shy. Girls in bars would devour him, and not in the good way.

Posted by: ParanoidAnxietyGirlInSeattle at May 01, 2011 12:28 AM (RZ8pf)

Wait, there's a bad way?

Posted by: Merovign, Dark Lord of the Sith at April 30, 2011 07:32 PM (bxiXv)

327 They're trying to invalidate eligibility requirements by precedent.
Because they're traitors.

What sickens me the most is the legion of conservative mouthpieces who want to help them do it.

I'm looking at you, Mark Steyn.

Posted by: The War Between the Undead States at April 30, 2011 07:33 PM (awbCy)

328

Aannnnd he lets it hang over the plate.  On purpose?

Posted by: Count de Monet at May 01, 2011 12:30 AM (XBM1t)

It doesn't matter now, there is no joy in St Joe, mighty chemjeff has bowed out.

Posted by: GGE of the Moron Horde at April 30, 2011 07:33 PM (f4gk9)

329 Oh come on, chemjeff is a nice cuddly chemistry professor who is somewhat shy. Girls in bars would devour him, and not in the good way.

Posted by: ParanoidAnxietyGirlInSeattle at May 01, 2011 12:28 AM (RZ8pf)

Nope, there are all kinds of girls that go to bars. Do you know any girl who hasn't gone to a bar? Now not every girl in a bar is there to get hit on but they don't knife you if you try.

Posted by: robtr at April 30, 2011 07:34 PM (MtwBb)

330

Wait, there's a bad way?

Posted by: Merovign, Dark Lord of the Sith at May 01, 2011 12:32 AM (bxiXv)

My thoughts exactly...

Posted by: GGE of the Moron Horde at April 30, 2011 07:34 PM (f4gk9)

331

Anyway, he'd been roofied.  I can tell you it wasn't his first rodeo, so it can happen to anyone.

 

I think that's what happened to FUBAR.  He must have put it in the wrong Coke Zero.

It's tough to keep track when you're bouncing around the room.

Posted by: garrett at April 30, 2011 07:35 PM (6+RxA)

332 Of course, chemjeff's probably the guy manufacturing the roofie.

Posted by: Papa Editor at April 30, 2011 07:36 PM (6neGz)

Posted by: someone at April 30, 2011 07:37 PM (bqjJT)

334 112 Some Obama 'jokes'
Posted by: Miss'80sBaby at April 30, 2011 10:49 PM

The Politico knob polisher called the examples "his best barbs"

Not even remotely funny, he'd get booed off the ONT for those. The MBM laughs at everything he says, so he has no clue as to what burns and what bombs

He's NOT a funny guy

Posted by: kbdabear at April 30, 2011 07:37 PM (vdfwz)

335 Of course, chemjeff's probably the guy manufacturing the roofie.

Posted by: Papa Editor at May 01, 2011 12:36 AM (6neGz)

Purely for experimental purposes, I assure you.

Posted by: chemjeff's students at April 30, 2011 07:37 PM (f4gk9)

336 Oh come on, chemjeff is a nice cuddly chemistry professor who is somewhat shy. Girls in bars would devour him, and not in the good way. Posted by: ParanoidAnxietyGirlInSeattle at May 01, 2011 12:28 AM (RZ8pf) No, no. He's an international diamond merchant. He's a movie producer. He's sad because women only seem to like him for his money.

Posted by: eman: Japanese Babe Rescue Team at April 30, 2011 07:37 PM (p2AIq)

337 Anyway, he'd been roofied.  I can tell you it wasn't his first rodeo, so it can happen to anyone.

Posted by: Papa Editor at May 01, 2011 12:32 AM (6neGz)

Well fuck, if he is in Mexico he already has a death wish. Why not go to a bar and double down.

Posted by: robtr at April 30, 2011 07:37 PM (MtwBb)

338 Between Timmy's stupid crap about needing to raise the credit limit to show we mean business on being fiscally responsible, and Obama taking yet another chance to insult someone to their face who can't fight back (SCOTUS, Paul Ryan), they are starting to phone it in.

I think they are seeing the internal polling (e.g. PA is upside-down and it a must win, they even lose FL to Palin) and getting desperate.  They are throwing any crap they can think of, hoping something will stick. But the public is tired of it, and laughing at how lame it all is.

When rank and file GOP start telling their liberal friends, "Yep, and I'm a racist too", then it's all become a big joke.

I'm smelling desperation.

Posted by: Dave in Fla at April 30, 2011 07:37 PM (cSkZ5)

339 I understand chemjeff, I really do.

He's WRONG, but I understand.

Posted by: Merovign, Dark Lord of the Sith at April 30, 2011 07:38 PM (bxiXv)

340

Well fuck, if he is in Mexico he already has a death wish. Why not go to a bar and double down.

Posted by: robtr at May 01, 2011 12:37 AM (MtwBb)

You should have seen him when they told him they were going to have to do surgery on his back in Mexico.

Posted by: Papa Editor at April 30, 2011 07:39 PM (6neGz)

341 Not even remotely funny, he'd get booed off the ONT for those. The MBM laughs at everything he says, so he has no clue as to what burns and what bombs

He's NOT a funny guy
Posted by: kbdabear at May 01, 2011 12:37 AM

But he is a clown, he's here to fuckin' amuse you

Posted by: Tommy DeVito at April 30, 2011 07:39 PM (vdfwz)

342 302 maybe not, eman
me, picking up a chick at a bar? the very thought is inconceivable
Posted by: chemjeff at May 01, 2011 12:18 AM (7mSYS)


and yoda sighed

Posted by: eman: Japanese Babe Rescue Team at May 01, 2011 12:19 AM (p2AIq)

"That... is why you fail."

Posted by: Ace's liver at April 30, 2011 07:40 PM (QgI7g)

343

They need to take the entire fucking Washington Correspondent's dinner and all those shithead reporters and politicians, stick it into a bathysphere with very little air and drop it into the abyss of the Marianas Trench after Triumph the Insult Dog finishes pooping on it.

Posted by: TexasJew at April 30, 2011 07:41 PM (uR5Zf)

344

You should have seen him when they told him they were going to have to do surgery on his back in Mexico.

Posted by: Papa Editor at May 01, 2011 12:39 AM (6neGz)

Yup, I can't see anything good happening from a trip to Mexico these days.

Posted by: robtr at April 30, 2011 07:41 PM (MtwBb)

345 No, no. He's an international diamond merchant.

He's a movie producer.

He's sad because women only seem to like him for his money.

And he's dangerous, but not in a threatening way.

Posted by: Ace's liver at April 30, 2011 07:41 PM (QgI7g)

346 Okay, so cj, if you weren't at the bar to pick up chicks why were you at the bar, at all? 

*and alcohol is not the correct answer.  That's something to be enjoyed in the paper bag you stole from the hobo you skinned.

Posted by: Papa Editor at April 30, 2011 07:41 PM (6neGz)

347

Anyway, he'd been roofied.  I can tell you it wasn't his first rodeo, so it can happen to anyone.

 

This happened to a buddy of mine in Vegas...sad story. 

One day you're a high-powered Casino Executive.

 The next, you're doing time for a Vehicular Hommicide you don't remember anything after having an after dinner drink at the bar.

Posted by: garrett at April 30, 2011 07:42 PM (6+RxA)

348

Yup, I can't see anything good happening from a trip to Mexico these days.

Posted by: robtr at May 01, 2011 12:41 AM (MtwBb)

Kahlua's still cheap in Chihuahua City... there's that.

Posted by: TexasJew at April 30, 2011 07:43 PM (uR5Zf)

349 The Politico knob polisher called the examples "his best barbs"

Posted by: kbdabear at May 01, 2011 12:37 AM (vdfwz)

They said he was "historically very diplomatic." They must be talking about those times in college no one seems to remember, because it certainly couldn't be the back-stabbing, suing, records-releasing, voting-present, babies-in-the-closet, "I won," closed-meeting, "car in the ditch," "kicking asses," bowing, scraping, ally-offending dictator-hugging smarmy shithead we all know and love.

That asshole is about as funny as 32 tooth-aches.

Posted by: Merovign, Dark Lord of the Sith at April 30, 2011 07:43 PM (bxiXv)

350 Waterworld would have been a better movie if they had just ended it with the sinking of the Exxon Valdez.

At least I had alcohol.

Oh, and before we discuss how much it sucked, it was much better than The English Patient.

Posted by: Dave in Fla at April 30, 2011 07:44 PM (cSkZ5)

351 Comrades! Your dating woes will vanish once the Party of Enlightenment fixes you up with the approved member who can best deliver the sufficient (and never waning) amount of rectal torment. Oh, happy day!

Posted by: derit at April 30, 2011 07:44 PM (FQlFL)

352 344 I understand chemjeff, I really do.

He's WRONG, but I understand.


what do you mean?

Posted by: chemjeff at April 30, 2011 07:46 PM (7mSYS)

353
Oh, and before we discuss how much it sucked, it was much better than The English Patient.

Posted by: Dave in Fla at May 01, 2011 12:44 AM (cSkZ5)

I HATE it!  I mean, sex in a bathtub?  You can't do that.

Posted by: Elaine Benes at April 30, 2011 07:47 PM (6neGz)

354 351 Okay, so cj, if you weren't at the bar to pick up chicks why were you at the bar, at all?

I was hungry and I also wanted a couple of beers
It wasn't like a nightclub or anything, it was Applebee's

Posted by: chemjeff at April 30, 2011 07:47 PM (7mSYS)

355 But isn't Applebee's the club in St. Joe?

Posted by: Elaine Benes at April 30, 2011 07:48 PM (6neGz)

356 359 351 Okay, so cj, if you weren't at the bar to pick up chicks why were you at the bar, at all?

I was hungry and I also wanted a couple of beers
It wasn't like a nightclub or anything, it was Applebee's

Posted by: chemjeff at May 01, 2011 12:47 AM (7mSYS)

I get a lot more pussy at Denny's myself. And they don't even have a salad bar.

Posted by: TexasJew at April 30, 2011 07:48 PM (uR5Zf)

357 I actually made myself watch the Obama video from tonight and I'm surprised at how tepid the laughter was in places. He even received some booing when he addressed the deficit and the R 2012 budget, though his lackeys tried to cover that. But it was clear that only some of the jokes actually worked for him.

Posted by: Miss'80sBaby at April 30, 2011 07:48 PM (qdBf5)

358 Of course the American Ark is the only one having problems...*sarc*.

Posted by: Kratos (Ghost of Sparta) at April 30, 2011 07:49 PM (ESrfn)

359 how do you get pussy at a Denny's?
that sounds strange

Posted by: chemjeff at April 30, 2011 07:49 PM (7mSYS)

360

I get a lot more pussy at Denny's myself. And they don't even have a salad bar.

I've heard that Dennys get deluged with transvestites during the wee hours of 1 and 6am. 

Posted by: Kratos (Ghost of Sparta) at April 30, 2011 07:50 PM (ESrfn)

361 364 how do you get pussy at a Denny's?
that sounds strange

Posted by: chemjeff at May 01, 2011 12:49 AM (7mSYS)

Not as strange as the pussy.

Posted by: TexasJew at April 30, 2011 07:50 PM (uR5Zf)

362 Obama is so unfunny he made John McCain look like a professional comedian.

Posted by: Papa Editor at April 30, 2011 07:50 PM (6neGz)

363 Not as strange as the pussy.

umm.... oh.
was this Denny's by the interstate?

Posted by: chemjeff at April 30, 2011 07:51 PM (7mSYS)

364

You know not all guys are as suave and debonair as some of you here on the ONT, who are obviously rolling in the babes otherwise you would be posting on a Saturda....oh, wait a minute.

Posted by: ParanoidAnxietyGirlInSeattle at April 30, 2011 07:51 PM (RZ8pf)

365 Well not everyone can have a bigamist child raper as a father and crack really good one-liners.

Posted by: TexasJew at April 30, 2011 07:52 PM (uR5Zf)

366 Screw you, PGiS.  I've got two babes with me right now.

Posted by: Papa Editor at April 30, 2011 07:52 PM (6neGz)

367

that sounds strange

 

Order the Grits.

Posted by: Flo the Denny's waitress at April 30, 2011 07:52 PM (6+RxA)

368 371 Screw you, PGiS.  I've got two babes with me right now.

Posted by: Papa Editor at May 01, 2011 12:52 AM (6neGz)


That's funny, so do I!

Posted by: Roman Polanski at April 30, 2011 07:52 PM (7mSYS)

369 was this Denny's by the interstate?

Posted by: chemjeff at May 01, 2011 12:51 AM (7mSYS)

Aren't they all?

Posted by: TexasJew at April 30, 2011 07:52 PM (uR5Zf)

370 LEAVE CHEMJEFF ALONE!!1!1!!1!


I'm dying over here!

Posted by: sickinmass at April 30, 2011 07:53 PM (1rflU)

371

You know not all guys are as suave and debonair as some of you here on the ONT, who are obviously rolling in the babes otherwise you would be posting on a Saturda....oh, wait a minute.

Posted by: ParanoidAnxietyGirlInSeattle at May 01, 2011 12:51 AM (RZ8pf)

hahaha. Hush, you

Posted by: GGE of the Moron Horde at April 30, 2011 07:53 PM (f4gk9)

372 I was hungry and I also wanted a couple of beers
It wasn't like a nightclub or anything, it was Applebee's

Posted by: chemjeff at May 01, 2011 12:47 AM (7mSYS)

Is there a new law about not talking to girls at applebees?

Chemjeff, I've been turned down a lot, most of us have. It comes with the mancard. It isn't a big deal, you will still wake up tomorrow and go about your life happily knowing that you are one step closer to not getting turned down.

Posted by: robtr at April 30, 2011 07:53 PM (MtwBb)

373 Applebee's? Never mind.

Posted by: eman: Japanese Babe Rescue Team at April 30, 2011 07:54 PM (p2AIq)

374 364 how do you get pussy at a Denny's?
that sounds strange

Posted by: chemjeff at May 01, 2011 12:49 AM (7mSYS)

And you ask my why you are wrong?

You were at Applebees in a quattrobella sandwich, and you were thinking about beer and food.

You put me in that position as ask me about food and I will look at you like you've asked me if I have a proton donor sticker on my driver's license.

Posted by: Merovign, Dark Lord of the Sith at April 30, 2011 07:54 PM (bxiXv)

375

Screw you, PGiS.  I've got two babes with me right now.

I was just joking, besides I knew as soon as I typed it that you would make some sort of wisecrack in rebuttal.

Posted by: ParanoidAnxietyGirlInSeattle at April 30, 2011 07:54 PM (RZ8pf)

376 Seth Meyers routine

He's been boring the handful of times I've seen him on SNL. Also incredibly nasty when he wants to be.

Posted by: Miss'80sBaby at April 30, 2011 07:54 PM (qdBf5)

377 Anyone see Dr. Who?  I have a good guess about something they're going to do.  Since it would be a spoiler, I'll white font it:   They're going to play around with the 18 minute gap in the Nixon-Watergate tapes.  You see, they're going to be the reason Nixon why starts taping everything.  Dr. Who tells him to do so because of The Silence.  So I figure the 18 minute gap will be Dr. Who showing up and goofing around doing his thing with the president.

Voila.

Posted by: rdbrewer at April 30, 2011 07:55 PM (tvrSx)

378 You were joking? 

Posted by: Papa Editor at April 30, 2011 07:55 PM (6neGz)

379

You know not all guys are as suave and debonair as some of you here on the ONT, who are obviously rolling in the babes otherwise you would be posting on a Saturda....oh, wait a minute.

Posted by: ParanoidAnxietyGirlInSeattle at May 01, 2011 12:51 AM (RZ8pf)

I am as deboner as the next guy... 

Posted by: Count de Monet at April 30, 2011 07:55 PM (XBM1t)

380 Whups!

Posted by: rdbrewer at April 30, 2011 07:55 PM (tvrSx)

381

Posted by: chemjeff at May 01, 2011 12:49 AM (7mSYS)

Jeff, tell them you are a Linguistics professor and you'd like to teach their vagina the Cyrillic Alphabet.

Posted by: garrett at April 30, 2011 07:55 PM (6+RxA)

382 Being suave and debonair is over-rated. 

Posted by: Kratos (Ghost of Sparta) at April 30, 2011 07:55 PM (ESrfn)

383 And I've been staring at it all evening, why the heck is that kid pinning the corsage to her thigh?

Posted by: ParanoidAnxietyGirlInSeattle at April 30, 2011 07:55 PM (RZ8pf)

384

You know not all guys are as suave and debonair as some of you here on the ONT, who are obviously rolling in the babes otherwise you would be posting on a Saturda....oh, wait a minute.

Posted by: ParanoidAnxietyGirlInSeattle at May 01, 2011 12:51 AM (RZ8pf)

Is Obama writing your jokes now?

Posted by: robtr at April 30, 2011 07:56 PM (MtwBb)

385 369 You know not all guys are as suave and debonair as some of you here on the ONT, who are obviously rolling in the babes otherwise you would be posting on a Saturda....oh, wait a minute.

Posted by: ParanoidAnxietyGirlInSeattle at May 01, 2011 12:51 AM (RZ8pf)

Girl, I was a social reject nerd for most of my life and I've got six thumbs on my left hand, but for crying out loud, when you're in a target-rich environment you gotta pull the trigger!

I have other excuses for being here Saturday, but you're right - I'm a hypocrite. BUT I am giving good advice, even if I'm not following it.

Posted by: Merovign, Dark Lord of the Sith at April 30, 2011 07:57 PM (bxiXv)

386 365 I've heard that Dennys get deluged with transvestites during the wee hours of 1 and 6am.

Where was that?

Posted by: Miss'80sBaby at April 30, 2011 07:57 PM (qdBf5)

387

Is Obama writing your jokes now?

Bite me.

Posted by: ParanoidAnxietyGirlInSeattle at April 30, 2011 07:57 PM (RZ8pf)

388 Predators!

Posted by: garrett at April 30, 2011 07:58 PM (6+RxA)

389 378
Applebee's?

Never mind.

Posted by: eman: Japanese Babe Rescue Team at May 01, 2011 12:54 AM (p2AIq)

Well, they closed down the Sambo's.

Posted by: TexasJew at April 30, 2011 07:58 PM (uR5Zf)

390 A Hello Kitty eyepatch reels the chicks in like crazy.

Posted by: eman: Japanese Babe Rescue Team at April 30, 2011 07:58 PM (p2AIq)

391 Woman: without her, man is nothing.

[but a droolin' fap machine of stupid]

Posted by: derit at April 30, 2011 07:59 PM (FQlFL)

392

Bite me.

Posted by: ParanoidAnxietyGirlInSeattle at May 01, 2011 12:57 AM (RZ8pf)

I love it when you talk dirty.

Posted by: robtr at April 30, 2011 07:59 PM (MtwBb)

393 Where was that?

Some Moron said that - I don't exactly remember who.  Ever since then, I've avoided Dennys like the plague. 

Posted by: Kratos (Ghost of Sparta) at April 30, 2011 07:59 PM (ESrfn)

394 Okay, I responded to chemjeff's Dennys comment without seeing Kratos' first.

Always, *always* read the whole conversation.

Posted by: Merovign, Dark Lord of the Sith at April 30, 2011 07:59 PM (bxiXv)

395 A Hello Kitty eyepatch reels the chicks in like crazy.

Posted by: eman: Japanese Babe Rescue Team at May 01, 2011 12:58 AM (p2AIq)

I was assuming that's why there was already 2 chicks to either side of him.

Posted by: Papa Editor at April 30, 2011 07:59 PM (6neGz)

396 There's actually quite a few hot babes at the Applebees i go to occasionally, and their waitresses in those tight black jeans are pretty easy on the eye too.

Posted by: booger at April 30, 2011 08:00 PM (9RFH1)

397
>>Where was that?

That's common knowledge M80.

Posted by: sickinmass at April 30, 2011 08:00 PM (1rflU)

398

A Hello Kitty eyepatch reels the chicks in like crazy.

Posted by: eman: Japanese Babe Rescue Team at May 01, 2011 12:58 AM (p2AIq)

 

 

 

alright, now that's some funny shit

Posted by: robtr at April 30, 2011 08:01 PM (MtwBb)

399 Denny's is where divorced dads bring their kids to see other divorced dads and their kids, every other weekend.

Posted by: eman: Japanese Babe Rescue Team at April 30, 2011 08:02 PM (p2AIq)

400 #369: Thanks for reminding me! I'm just gonna go sit in the corner and cry for a little while. Carry on without me; I'll be back shortly.

Posted by: Genetic Tunder at April 30, 2011 08:02 PM (mfQD5)

401

alright, now that's some funny shit

Posted by: robtr at May 01, 2011 01:01 AM (MtwBb)

That's what Politico said about Obama choking on an olive for five minutes.

Posted by: TexasJew at April 30, 2011 08:02 PM (uR5Zf)

402 When I was a kid I always wanted to go to Denny's for breakfast because I could get spaghetti.  Anything, anytime.

Posted by: Papa Editor at April 30, 2011 08:03 PM (6neGz)

403 407 When I was a kid I always wanted to go to Denny's for breakfast because I could get spaghetti.  Anything, anytime.

Posted by: Papa Editor at May 01, 2011 01:03 AM (6neGz)

Sounds like Las Vegas.

Posted by: TexasJew at April 30, 2011 08:04 PM (uR5Zf)

404 402 That's common knowledge M80.

In my former college town, students would do in groups when studying for a test. Someone would post a notice on FB that such-&-such study group was going and to go to this-or-that parking lot if you wanted to go. It was mostly the engineering students who did this.

Posted by: Miss'80sBaby at April 30, 2011 08:04 PM (qdBf5)

405 Okay, I'm back! Did I miss anything?

Posted by: Genetic Tunder at April 30, 2011 08:05 PM (mfQD5)

406 408 407 When I was a kid I always wanted to go to Denny's for breakfast because I could get spaghetti.  Anything, anytime.

Posted by: Papa Editor at May 01, 2011 01:03 AM (6neGz)

Sounds like Las Vegas.

Sounds like gastric hell. 

Posted by: Kratos (Ghost of Sparta) at April 30, 2011 08:06 PM (xy7lk)

407 374 was this Denny's by the interstate?
Posted by: chemjeff at May 01, 2011 12:51 AM (7mSYS)

Aren't they all?
Posted by: TexasJew at May 01, 2011 12:52 AM (uR5Zf)

________

I think you've got it confused with Waffle House.

I was once lost on a business trip in Georgia. We found our way back to the interstate by looking for Waffle Houses.

(handy survival tip)

Posted by: Anachronda at April 30, 2011 08:06 PM (6fER6)

408 In my former college town, students would do in groups when studying for a test. Someone would post a notice on FB that such-&-such study group was going and to go to this-or-that parking lot if you wanted to go. It was mostly the engineering students who did this.

Posted by: Miss'80sBaby at May 01, 2011 01:04 AM (qdBf5)

When I was in college we did the same thing, except we used the telegraph.

Posted by: robtr at April 30, 2011 08:07 PM (MtwBb)

409 I liked Dennys for their hashbrowns when i was a kid, and Arby's for their potato cakes, clearly i had a problem with tuber addiction from a young age.

Posted by: booger at April 30, 2011 08:07 PM (9RFH1)

410 thank you PGiS for sticking up for me.  I don't deserve it based on how I treated you but I am grateful nonetheless.

and you all are right - I probably should have at least said "hi" or something.  at least it would have been good practice.

Posted by: chemjeff at April 30, 2011 08:07 PM (7mSYS)

411 Okay, I'm back! Did I miss anything?

Posted by: Genetic Tunder at May 01, 2011 01:05 AM (mfQD5)

Yes.  TJ responded with something about Politico and olives to robtr, I spoke about spaghetti at Dennys, and, again, TJ responded with something about Vegas.  The M80's gave us an anecdote about Facebook and study groups.

Posted by: Papa Editor at April 30, 2011 08:08 PM (6neGz)

412 401 There's actually quite a few hot babes at the Applebees i go to occasionally, and their waitresses in those tight black jeans are pretty easy on the eye too.

Posted by: booger at May 01, 2011 01:00 AM (9RFH1)

They pretty much have to fend off boorish hounds all day long, unless you have something to say that will make their day you're just one of the crowd.

I just would rather make someone happy than bore them with what they always get.

Posted by: Merovign, Dark Lord of the Sith at April 30, 2011 08:08 PM (bxiXv)

413 Best greasy dive ever? Stuckeys. Chow down and then browse their cheesy souvenir shop, good times.

Posted by: booger at April 30, 2011 08:08 PM (9RFH1)

414 Thanks for the update, Papa!

Posted by: Genetic Tunder at April 30, 2011 08:10 PM (mfQD5)

415 They pretty much have to fend off boorish hounds all day long, unless you have something to say that will make their day you're just one of the crowd.

see that is how I feel about making comments about the wait staff.

Posted by: chemjeff at April 30, 2011 08:10 PM (7mSYS)

416 I would be at Denny's right now, scouting things out, but it's "all you can eat night" and I'm not a chubby chaser..

Posted by: TexasJew at April 30, 2011 08:10 PM (uR5Zf)

417 mmm stuckey's mmm
actually, Perkins is getting close to the same league
I went there for breakfast the other day, and it wasn't all that great

Posted by: chemjeff at April 30, 2011 08:11 PM (7mSYS)

418

When I was in college we did the same thing, except we used the telegraph.

Posted by: robtr at May 01, 2011 01:07 AM (MtwBb)

You lucky bastard!  We wished we had the telegraph.  We had to use smoke signals.

Posted by: One of the Four Yorkshiremen in the American West at April 30, 2011 08:11 PM (XBM1t)

419 the who at woodstock were amazing....im still in awe watching it...

....and the kids today have....friggin cee lo green singing "fuck you"

....the end is near...

Posted by: skr8 outta at April 30, 2011 08:12 PM (zcTu+)

420 and you all are right - I probably should have at least said "hi" or something.  at least it would have been good practice.

Posted by: chemjeff at May 01, 2011 01:07 AM (7mSYS)

Chemjeff, you have the perfect get aquainted line.

You're new in town, you are a professor and you want to make some new friends. You have to remember, you are trying to talk to a woman, they love to talk blah blah bla blah blah.

Posted by: robtr at April 30, 2011 08:12 PM (MtwBb)

421 Chemjeff - every "No" is another step towards a "Yes."

Don't be afraid to ask.  At least, that's what I hear

Posted by: NC Ref at April 30, 2011 08:12 PM (/izg2)

422 thank you PGiS for sticking up for me. I don't deserve it based on how I treated you but I am grateful nonetheless. and you all are right - I probably should have at least said "hi" or something. at least it would have been good practice. Posted by: chemjeff at May 01, 2011 01:07 AM (7mSYS) Dude, we were just messing with the set up, not picking on you.

Posted by: eman: Japanese Babe Rescue Team at April 30, 2011 08:12 PM (p2AIq)

423
>>I don't deserve it based on how I treated you..

Ok. What happened? Miss a day and I miss a lot!

Posted by: sickinmass at April 30, 2011 08:12 PM (1rflU)

424 422 mmm stuckey's mmm
actually, Perkins is getting close to the same league
I went there for breakfast the other day, and it wasn't all that great

Posted by: chemjeff at May 01, 2011 01:11 AM (7mSYS)

You should have just gotten the cheese logs to go.

Posted by: TexasJew at April 30, 2011 08:12 PM (uR5Zf)

425

The Denny's close to my house is taken over after midnight by the ummm, overweight cosplay crowd. It only took once seeing a 400 pound woman in a scantily wrapped sheet to keep me away from there at night for good. The 400 pound woman in a leather corset and nothing else didn't help much either.

Posted by: ParanoidAnxietyGirlInSeattle at April 30, 2011 08:13 PM (RZ8pf)

426 see that is how I feel about making comments about the wait staff.

Posted by: chemjeff at May 01, 2011 01:10 AM (7mSYS)

You can also have a friendly, brief conversation with someone and *not* hit on them.

That's also good practice.

Just being *pleasant* can make a frazzled waitresses' day.

Posted by: Merovign, Dark Lord of the Sith at April 30, 2011 08:13 PM (bxiXv)

427 chemjeff, I forgot one thing. Tell them to not pay any attention to the hello kitty eyepatch.

Posted by: robtr at April 30, 2011 08:14 PM (MtwBb)

428 My favorite 3am drunk off my ass Dennys plate was always potato skins.

Posted by: booger at April 30, 2011 08:14 PM (9RFH1)

429 You lucky bastard! We wished we had the telegraph. We had to use smoke signals. Posted by: One of the Four Yorkshiremen in the American West at May 01, 2011 01:11 AM (XBM1t) You had fire? Must have been nice.

Posted by: eman: Japanese Babe Rescue Team at April 30, 2011 08:14 PM (p2AIq)

430 Don't be afraid to ask.  At least, that's what I hear

Posted by: NC Ref at May 01, 2011 01:12 AM (/izg2)

Sorta true story - I've never been turned down when I've asked.  Except that one time when I asked my wife for a first date, but then she asked me out 3-days later, so it doesn't really count as a no.  (She said she already had plans to drive her friend to the airport.  Whatevs!)

Posted by: Papa Editor at April 30, 2011 08:15 PM (6neGz)

431 430

The Denny's close to my house is taken over after midnight by the ummm, overweight cosplay crowd. It only took once seeing a 400 pound woman in a scantily wrapped sheet to keep me away from there at night for good. The 400 pound woman in a leather corset and nothing else didn't help much either.

Posted by: ParanoidAnxietyGirlInSeattle at May 01, 2011 01:13 AM (RZ8pf)

Having that visual kind of takes the away the excitement of their chicken fried steaks slathered in white paste gravy.

Posted by: TexasJew at April 30, 2011 08:15 PM (uR5Zf)

432 You can also have a friendly, brief conversation with someone and *not* hit on them.

that is what I try to do
but then people tell me that I'm "missing an opportunity"

Posted by: chemjeff at April 30, 2011 08:15 PM (7mSYS)

433 Sorta true story - I've never been turned down when I've asked.

bullshit - I've seen you

Posted by: chemjeff at April 30, 2011 08:16 PM (7mSYS)

434

Posted by: skr8 outta at May 01, 2011 01:12 AM (zcTu+)

 

'Live at Leeds'.

Posted by: garrett at April 30, 2011 08:17 PM (6+RxA)

435 Well, they were both pasty white, and there was probably some gravy in their folds somewhere TexasJew.

Posted by: ParanoidAnxietyGirlInSeattle at April 30, 2011 08:17 PM (RZ8pf)

436 It's not bullshit, chemjeff. 

But if we're gonna throw looks into the mix...  fuck.

Posted by: Papa Editor at April 30, 2011 08:18 PM (6neGz)

437 (She said she already had plans to drive her friend to the airport.  Whatevs!)

She had a plan too.  Very nice.

Posted by: NC Ref at April 30, 2011 08:18 PM (/izg2)

438

 (She said she already had plans to drive her friend to the airport.  Whatevs!)

I remember when we used to call it that.

Posted by: garrett at April 30, 2011 08:19 PM (6+RxA)

439 440 Well, they were both pasty white, and there was probably some gravy in their folds somewhere TexasJew.

Posted by: ParanoidAnxietyGirlInSeattle at May 01, 2011 01:17 AM (RZ8pf)

Wow.

I wish you were in Texas, that's all I have to say.

Posted by: TexasJew at April 30, 2011 08:19 PM (uR5Zf)

440 that is what I try to do
but then people tell me that I'm "missing an opportunity"

Posted by: chemjeff at May 01, 2011 01:15 AM (7mSYS)

it wouldn't hurt after you have been talking to someone for awhile to tell them they seem really nice and ask if they would like to get a cup of coffee sometime or milk I guess since you are in st joe

Posted by: robtr at April 30, 2011 08:19 PM (MtwBb)

441 Some of us get hit on by hot chicks all the time, but we have to turn them down because we are way to busy. Then the alarm goes off and we wake up.

Posted by: eman: Japanese Babe Rescue Team at April 30, 2011 08:19 PM (p2AIq)

442

You lucky bastard! We wished we had the telegraph. We had to use smoke signals.

Posted by: One of the Four Yorkshiremen in the American West at May 01, 2011 01:11 AM (XBM1t)

Bah. Luxury.

Posted by: Merovign, Dark Yorkshireman of the Sith at April 30, 2011 08:20 PM (bxiXv)

443

Woh,

This bill has a 15% charge for not smiling at my waiter....and another 10% charge for the water?....................How did I end up in a West L.A eatery?

Damn cocktails

Posted by: Richard at April 30, 2011 08:20 PM (OJjIU)

444 it wouldn't hurt after you have been talking to someone for awhile to tell them they seem really nice and ask if they would like to get a cup of coffee sometime or milk I guess since you are in st joe

Does that include waitresses?

Posted by: chemjeff at April 30, 2011 08:21 PM (7mSYS)

445

Wow, poor liberals on their iPhones and iPads having to learn that their cool devices are made by workers in China who are treated inhumanely.

I exempt conservatives who own these devices, because I imagine those of us who do own them know good and well what kind of conditions they are made in.

Posted by: ParanoidAnxietyGirlInSeattle at April 30, 2011 08:21 PM (RZ8pf)

446

Does that include waitresses?

No. 

Posted by: garrett at April 30, 2011 08:22 PM (6+RxA)

447 We had something unusual happen for 3min yesterday-- it rained. Hardly long enough to mean much but I was still happy to see it. It only rained 2x last month.

Posted by: Miss'80sBaby at April 30, 2011 08:22 PM (qdBf5)

448 TexasJew, so you could slap me upside the head for planting that image in your brain?

Posted by: ParanoidAnxietyGirlInSeattle at April 30, 2011 08:22 PM (RZ8pf)

449 All I'm going to say, cj, is that you have a lot more to learn about asking chicks out than even I imagined. 

Posted by: Papa Editor at April 30, 2011 08:22 PM (6neGz)

450

I exempt conservatives who own these devices, because I imagine those of us who do own them know good and well what kind of conditions they are made in.

Posted by: ParanoidAnxietyGirlInSeattle at May 01, 2011 01:21 AM (RZ8pf)

We're heartless about our texting.

Posted by: TexasJew at April 30, 2011 08:22 PM (uR5Zf)

451 yup i know the live at leeds set...

but the woodstock tommy performance is just....its astounding...

america and great britain used to rock the fucking house....and i mean ROCK THE FUCKING HOUSE....

....we now suck balls...we both suck nasty...bitter....infected nuts when it comes to teh rocknroll....

....what the fuck happened?  where did we go the hell wrong?


Posted by: skr8 outta at April 30, 2011 08:23 PM (zcTu+)

452 Does that include waitresses?

Posted by: chemjeff at May 01, 2011 01:21 AM (7mSYS)

Absolutely, as long as you don't include could I have another beer as talking to someone. Even then it can't hurt.

Posted by: robtr at April 30, 2011 08:23 PM (MtwBb)

453 I don't think "would you like to get some milk some time" is the best possible pick up line, but maybe things are different in the midwest.

Posted by: ParanoidAnxietyGirlInSeattle at April 30, 2011 08:23 PM (RZ8pf)

454

The Denny's close to my house is taken over after midnight by the ummm, overweight cosplay crowd. It only took once seeing a 400 pound woman in a scantily wrapped sheet to keep me away from there at night for good. The 400 pound woman in a leather corset and nothing else didn't help much either.

Posted by: ParanoidAnxietyGirlInSeattle at May 01, 2011 01:13 AM (RZ8pf)

So, um...where is this again?

what?

Posted by: GGE of the Moron Horde at April 30, 2011 08:23 PM (f4gk9)

455 Wow, poor liberals on their iPhones and iPads having to learn that their cool devices are made by workers in China who are treated inhumanely. I exempt conservatives who own these devices, because I imagine those of us who do own them know good and well what kind of conditions they are made in. Posted by: ParanoidAnxietyGirlInSeattle at May 01, 2011 01:21 AM (RZ8pf) You know, I saw that story today and now I don't want an iPad. But, what is electronic gadget is not made inhumanely these days? I'm using an iMac right now; it probably came from a similar place. Fuck.

Posted by: eman: Japanese Babe Rescue Team at April 30, 2011 08:24 PM (p2AIq)

456 453 TexasJew, so you could slap me upside the head for planting that image in your brain?

Posted by: ParanoidAnxietyGirlInSeattle at May 01, 2011 01:22 AM (RZ8pf)

Just the opposite.

Posted by: TexasJew at April 30, 2011 08:24 PM (uR5Zf)

457

I exempt conservatives who own these devices, because I imagine those of us who do own them know good and well what kind of conditions they are made in.

Posted by: ParanoidAnxietyGirlInSeattle at May 01, 2011 01:21 AM (RZ8pf)

absolutely, plus knowing that their present conditions making your i phone is a fucking upgrade for them.

Posted by: robtr at April 30, 2011 08:25 PM (MtwBb)

458

 I think "would you like to show me how you milk a cow some milk some time" is the best possible pick up line, but maybe things are different in the midwest.

 

Posted by: garrett at April 30, 2011 08:26 PM (6+RxA)

459 you know....the more i watch "gimme shelter" the more i side with the hells angels lol

Posted by: skr8 outta at April 30, 2011 08:26 PM (zcTu+)

460 446 Some of us get hit on by hot chicks all the time, but we have to turn them down because we are way to busy.

Posted by: eman: Japanese Babe Rescue Team at May 01, 2011 01:19 AM (p2AIq)

Happened to me once. 6'2" blond opera singer. I am dead serious.

That is the day I decided (later, upon reflection) that I do indeed have the capacity to be the dumbest motherfucker on the entire planet.

Oh, I was young, socially inexperienced, nerdy, intimidated, NO EXCUSES!

Man, I will never forget how stupid I was that day.

The day I drove myself into the fucking ER because I was dying was a better day than that one.

I know, TMI. Just Jesus, people, don't be idiots. Hypocritical good advice of the day.

Posted by: Merovign, Dark Lord of the Sith at April 30, 2011 08:26 PM (bxiXv)

461

Just the opposite.

Posted by: TexasJew at May 01, 2011 01:24 AM (uR5Zf)

So you could plant the image in her brain of her slapping you upside your head?

Posted by: GGE of the Moron Horde at April 30, 2011 08:26 PM (f4gk9)

462

But, what is electronic gadget is not made inhumanely these days?

Well, exactly. If you want it fast and relatively low cost, then the factories where it is made tend to not be high on the scale for treating employees well. Ironically, China is beginning to raise the standard of living for their workers so now companies are moving on to the next third world hell hole where they can get things made for pennies on the dollar.

Posted by: ParanoidAnxietyGirlInSeattle at April 30, 2011 08:27 PM (RZ8pf)

463
Goodnite peeps..

 Up early to drive an hour to buy my daughter a new car. Her engine shit the bed last night on her way here to visit.

Heading for a Nissan dealer. Any recommendations for a 2011 model?
Her car that died was a Mitsubishi. It had 80k and engine was warrantied for 60K. Oh well.

Posted by: sickinmass at April 30, 2011 08:27 PM (1rflU)

464 sickinmass don't buy a new car, the depreciation will kill you
buy a 2-3 year old car, low mileage

Posted by: chemjeff at April 30, 2011 08:29 PM (7mSYS)

465 458 I don't think "would you like to get some milk some time" is the best possible pick up line, but maybe things are different in the midwest.

Posted by: ParanoidAnxietyGirlInSeattle at May 01, 2011 01:23 AM (RZ8pf)

Bow chicka wow wow!

Posted by: Private Lavernius Tucker, Love Machine at April 30, 2011 08:29 PM (bxiXv)

466 Heading for a Nissan dealer. Any recommendations for a 2011 model?
Her car that died was a Mitsubishi. It had 80k and engine was warrantied for 60K. Oh well.

Posted by: sickinmass at May 01, 2011 01:27 AM (1rflU)

My daughter and her husband are thinking of buying a new Nissan. They told me which model but I can't remember what it was.

Posted by: robtr at April 30, 2011 08:30 PM (MtwBb)

467

Posted by: sickinmass at May 01, 2011 01:27 AM (1rflU)

 

I have some friends who love their Muranos...if you could find a low mile lease buy-back, that might be a good choice.

Posted by: garrett at April 30, 2011 08:31 PM (6+RxA)

468 Any recommendations for a 2011 model?
Her car that died was a Mitsubishi. It had 80k and engine was warrantied for 60K. Oh well.

Posted by: sickinmass at May 01, 2011 01:27 AM (1rflU)

A recommendation, but it's not a Nissan...31mpg with the V6...and you can get a good deal on the 2011 now since the '12s are in the show-rooms.

Posted by: GGE of the Moron Horde at April 30, 2011 08:31 PM (f4gk9)

469 ....what the fuck happened?  where did we go the hell wrong?


Posted by: skr8 outta at May 01, 2011 01:23 AM (zcTu+)

 

James G Watt, Secretary of the Interior, banned the The Beach Boys in 1983 from playing on the Mall for the 4th of July celebration.

Posted by: One of the Four Yorkshiremen in the American West at April 30, 2011 08:32 PM (XBM1t)

470

Posted by: sickinmass at May 01, 2011 01:27 AM (1rflU)

Sorry - I'm a truck guy.

I know bubkis about cars.

Posted by: TexasJew at April 30, 2011 08:32 PM (uR5Zf)

471 america and great britain used to rock the fucking house....and i mean ROCK THE FUCKING HOUSE....

....we now suck balls...we both suck nasty...bitter....infected nuts when it comes to teh rocknroll....

....what the fuck happened?  where did we go the hell wrong?

Hi there!

Posted by: Nirvana at April 30, 2011 08:33 PM (9RFH1)

472 I'm sleepy. I'm going to try and go to sleep now and not have nightmares about the evil aliens from the Doctor Who episode. They were really creepy, their behavior more than their looks though they weren't exactly cuddly little ewoks in the looks department either.

Posted by: ParanoidAnxietyGirlInSeattle at April 30, 2011 08:34 PM (RZ8pf)

473 466

Just the opposite.

Posted by: TexasJew at May 01, 2011 01:24 AM (uR5Zf)

So you could plant the image in her brain of her slapping you upside your head?

Posted by: GGE of the Moron Horde at May 01, 2011 01:26 AM (f4gk9)

Sir, you obviously do not have a romantic soul.

Posted by: TexasJew at April 30, 2011 08:34 PM (uR5Zf)

474 Sleep well and wake PGiS.

Posted by: GGE of the Moron Horde at April 30, 2011 08:34 PM (f4gk9)

475 hey now, Nirvana actually had a few good songs
Pearl Jam too, and STP
don't knock grunge, it had a formative effect on me during my college years

Posted by: chemjeff at April 30, 2011 08:35 PM (7mSYS)

476 I'm sleepy. I'm going to try and go to sleep now and not have nightmares about the evil aliens from the Doctor Who episode. They were really creepy, their behavior more than their looks though they weren't exactly cuddly little ewoks in the looks department either.

Posted by: ParanoidAnxietyGirlInSeattle at May 01, 2011 01:34 AM (RZ8pf)

Nite, don't forget to leave the blinds open

Posted by: robtr at April 30, 2011 08:35 PM (MtwBb)

477 good night PGiS
sweet dreams!
dream of puppehs and kittehs

Posted by: chemjeff at April 30, 2011 08:35 PM (7mSYS)

478

Sir, you obviously do not have a romantic soul.

Posted by: TexasJew at May 01, 2011 01:34 AM (uR5Zf)

Actually I just had a mental image of her smacking you upside your head and thought it was funny.

Posted by: GGE of the Moron Horde at April 30, 2011 08:35 PM (f4gk9)

479 480 hey now, Nirvana actually had a few good songs
Pearl Jam too, and STP
don't knock grunge, it had a formative effect on me during my college years

Posted by: chemjeff at May 01, 2011 01:35 AM (7mSYS)

And they play it at all the Applebees.

Posted by: TexasJew at April 30, 2011 08:35 PM (uR5Zf)

480 Heading for a Nissan dealer. Any recommendations for a 2011 model?

The Leaf!

Try not to travel more than 50 miles from home.

Posted by: Algore, Gaia's handmaiden at April 30, 2011 08:35 PM (nIZa7)

481 Asking out your waitress is kind of an iffy proposition at best. If you're not a regular customer, then you're just another horndog making her day worse. If you are a regular, a nice guy, and well-liked by the staff, then she'll be on the spot; she'll probably agree to go out with you just once, even if she's not really interested, just out of fear of losing your business.

Posted by: Genetic Tunder at April 30, 2011 08:35 PM (mfQD5)

482
>>don't buy a new car, the depreciation will kill you

She has to have a car by tomorrow. She will drive a car off the lot tomorrow trust me. I want her home at her house. I spoke to the dealer today by phone and everything is arranged. They will transfer the registration and tag.

Posted by: sickinmass at April 30, 2011 08:36 PM (1rflU)

483

1979-1990  Best Decade for Rock and Roll. There's a lifetime and a half of great music in there.

There's been some good stuff since, but it isn't straight Rock and Roll.  The AltCountry movement is the highlight of what came afterwards...but the great small labels were almost all absorbed by the mid-90's.

 

Posted by: garrett at April 30, 2011 08:37 PM (6+RxA)

484 Posted by: chemjeff at May 01, 2011 01:35 AM (7mSYS)

Oh i like plenty of Nirvana, STP, Soundgarden etc., but there's no denying that rock music changed for the worse after them.

Posted by: booger at April 30, 2011 08:37 PM (9RFH1)

485 Posted by: GGE of the Moron Horde at May 01, 2011 01:31 AM (f4gk9)

Nobody even has to look, one-track.

Posted by: Merovign, Dark Lord of the Sith at April 30, 2011 08:37 PM (bxiXv)

486 she'll probably agree to go out with you just once, even if she's not really interested, just out of fear of losing your business.

Posted by: Genetic Tunder at May 01, 2011 01:35 AM (mfQD5)

Not really, I've dated two women bartenders that I met while they were tending bar.

Posted by: robtr at April 30, 2011 08:38 PM (MtwBb)

487 Nobody even has to look, one-track.

Posted by: Merovign, Dark Lord of the Sith at May 01, 2011 01:37 AM (bxiXv)

You say that like it's a bad thing...

Posted by: GGE of the Moron Horde at April 30, 2011 08:38 PM (f4gk9)

488 486 Asking out your waitress is kind of an iffy proposition at best.   Posted by: Genetic Tunder at May 01, 2011 01:35 AM (mfQD5)   I've done that a number of times. Plus, you don't have to tip them as much later.

Posted by: TexasJew at April 30, 2011 08:38 PM (uR5Zf)

489 grunge killed metal (back when lita ford was hot), for that it cannot be forgiven. And it brought us 3 non-blondes...*gagging*

Posted by: derit at April 30, 2011 08:39 PM (FQlFL)

490 I think I finally learned the "pearls before swine" lesson, tonight.

Posted by: Papa Editor at April 30, 2011 08:40 PM (6neGz)

491 Cheetahs are pussies.

Posted by: honey badger at April 30, 2011 08:40 PM (GfhFm)

492 Besides, everyone's driving Altimas, or Accords, or whatever the fuck Toyota's POS standard 4 door sedan is. Be different, get her a Subaru!

Posted by: GGE of the Moron Horde at April 30, 2011 08:41 PM (f4gk9)

493 Heading for a Nissan dealer. Any recommendations for a 2011 model?
Her car that died was a Mitsubishi. It had 80k and engine was warrantied for 60K. Oh well.

Posted by: sickinmass at May 01, 2011 01:27 AM (1rflU)

We'd have to know what she had and what she wants, everybody will just tell you what *they* would buy.

For example, I'd say GTR, but that's *probably* not what you're going to get unless she had an EVO VIII or something like that.

The altima is okay, I'd get the 3.5 liter because cars are all so damned slow these days, but you save like 5 pennies a year or whatever if you get the boat-anchor engine.

Posted by: Merovign, Dark Lord of the Sith at April 30, 2011 08:41 PM (bxiXv)

494 actually, I was just thinking this, while at the Ode to Joy concert:
where is this generation's great composers?
why is it all we get is Lady Gaga and crap like that?
where are the Beethovens of the 21st century?
maybe they're out there and we just haven't heard of them, but it does seem weird that all of the great composers that we ever only talk about or reference are the same dead ones, over and over again, nobody from the modern era

Posted by: chemjeff at April 30, 2011 08:41 PM (7mSYS)

495

grunge killed metal

Bullshit.  SLAYER and GWAR and MAIDEN are still going strong.

Metallica is trying to kill Metal since 1991, but they haven't been successful.

Posted by: garrett at April 30, 2011 08:41 PM (6+RxA)

496 OH DEAR LORD, DON'T GET A SUBARU, UNLESS YOU WANT EVERYONE THINKING YOUR DAUGHTER IS A LESBIAN

Posted by: chemjeff at April 30, 2011 08:42 PM (7mSYS)

497

Posted by: chemjeff at May 01, 2011 01:41 AM (7mSYS)

Zappa. (20th Century).

 

Posted by: garrett at April 30, 2011 08:43 PM (6+RxA)

Posted by: GGE of the Moron Horde at April 30, 2011 08:43 PM (f4gk9)

499
I will fill you all in tomorrow what happens. Thanks for your thoughts on the matter.

Posted by: sickinmass at April 30, 2011 08:43 PM (1rflU)

500

The last car I had was in 1987, some Toyota Camry piece of shit.

. It got washed away in a flash flood on a drilling rig outside of North Zulch, Texas (I shit you not). We had to get helicoptered out.

Have had bigass trucks and SUVs ever since. Fuck it.

Posted by: TexasJew at April 30, 2011 08:44 PM (uR5Zf)

501 OH DEAR LORD, DON'T GET A SUBARU, UNLESS YOU WANT EVERYONE THINKING YOUR DAUGHTER IS A LESBIAN

Posted by: chemjeff at May 01, 2011 01:42 AM (7mSYS)

Wait...I have a Subaru...

Posted by: GGE of the Moron Horde at April 30, 2011 08:44 PM (f4gk9)

502 Well, the waitresses I've dated, I kind of got that impression from them. But if other guys have had different experiences, well, maybe you're better off listening to them, Jeff.

Posted by: Genetic Tunder at April 30, 2011 08:44 PM (mfQD5)

503

Wait...I have a Subaru...

 

Smells like Pollack to me.

Posted by: garrett at April 30, 2011 08:45 PM (6+RxA)

504 where are the Beethovens of the 21st century?
maybe they're out there and we just haven't heard of them, but it does seem weird that all of the great composers that we ever only talk about or reference are the same dead ones, over and over again, nobody from the modern era

Posted by: chemjeff at May 01, 2011 01:41 AM (7mSYS)

small market chemjeff, people with talent are going to go where the money is. Of course I haven't really seen much talent in anything as of late.

Posted by: robtr at April 30, 2011 08:45 PM (MtwBb)

505 huh I don't know much about Zappa - what of his should I listen to?

Posted by: chemjeff at April 30, 2011 08:46 PM (7mSYS)

506 497 Besides, everyone's driving Altimas, or Accords, or whatever the fuck Toyota's POS standard 4 door sedan is. Be different, get her a Subaru!

Posted by: GGE of the Moron Horde at May 01, 2011 01:41 AM (f4gk9)

Evo ate its lunch and drank its milkshake.

No, Mitsus are not more reliable than Subarus. BUT the Evo is not significantly less reliable than the WRX.

That's for the new Evo, the early ones were not very reliable.

I doubt sickinmass is actually thinking along these lines.

Posted by: Merovign, Dark Lord of the Sith at April 30, 2011 08:46 PM (bxiXv)

507 huh I don't know much about Zappa - what of his should I listen to?

Posted by: chemjeff at May 01, 2011 01:46 AM (7mSYS)

weasels ripped my flesh

Posted by: robtr at April 30, 2011 08:47 PM (MtwBb)

508

Posted by: Genetic Tunder at May 01, 2011 01:44 AM (mfQD5)

Nope.  Your instincts are correct. 

A woman at work can be flirted with endlessly, but asking them out on the job is a tough  proposition. (and gauche) 

 Better off to work your chops out with them and hope to dumb into them somewhere else if you must ask them out...but they will help you gain confidence which will help your game elsewhere.

Posted by: garrett at April 30, 2011 08:47 PM (6+RxA)

509 Well, they closed down the Sambo's.

Sambo's!  I remember Sambo's.  I haven't thought of that place in... oh, must be 35 years or so.

Posted by: Ace's liver at April 30, 2011 08:49 PM (QgI7g)

510

huh I don't know much about Zappa

 

'Sheik Yerbouti' and 'Joe's Garage'. 

'Apostraphe / Overnight Sensation'.

'Weasels...'

all good stuff.  He's got some orchestral stuff that is quite interesting, too.

Posted by: garrett at April 30, 2011 08:50 PM (6+RxA)

511 Better off to work your chops out with them and hope to dumb into them somewhere else if you must ask them out...but they will help you gain confidence which will help your game elsewhere.

Posted by: garrett at May 01, 2011 01:47 AM (6+RxA)

Horseshit. One of the best dates of my life was with a waitress at a Trini's in Austin when I was 17. Asked her right over the guacomole.

It was a five day lost weekend.

Plus I got some of their fine horsemeat enchiladas free.

Posted by: TexasJew at April 30, 2011 08:50 PM (uR5Zf)

512 512 huh I don't know much about Zappa - what of his should I listen to?

Posted by: chemjeff at May 01, 2011 01:46 AM (7mSYS)

weasels ripped my flesh

Posted by: robtr at May 01, 2011 01:47 AM (MtwBb)


Weasels are posers.

Posted by: honey badger at April 30, 2011 08:50 PM (GfhFm)

513
I am thinking Maxima. She will fall in love with whatev catches her eye.
Since I will be paying for it, I'll have the ultimate say.

G/N

Posted by: sickinmass at April 30, 2011 08:50 PM (1rflU)

514

A woman at work can be flirted with endlessly, but asking them out on the job is a tough  proposition. (and gauche) 


Posted by: garrett at May 01, 2011 01:47 AM (6+RxA)

Again, I'll be bucking the trend, I guess, but met my wife at work.  Never thought I'd do that.  Had "rules" against it, in fact.  And no matter how ugly chemjeff says I am, well, I have the goods to show for it which not even he can deny.

Posted by: Papa Editor at April 30, 2011 08:51 PM (6neGz)

515

CJ -

 Do you own any Uncle Tupelo albums? If not, check them out...they begat Son Volt and Wilco.  Also well worth your aural time. 

Posted by: garrett at April 30, 2011 08:52 PM (6+RxA)

516 I didn't say you are ugly, Editor, only that you aren't so super-studly so as to have never been turned down ever

Posted by: chemjeff at April 30, 2011 08:52 PM (7mSYS)

517 and I am going to bed - good night all
thanx for the advice

Posted by: chemjeff at April 30, 2011 08:53 PM (7mSYS)

518 Asking out your waitress is kind of an iffy proposition at best. Posted by: Genetic Tunder at May 01, 2011 01:35 AM (mfQD5) I've done that a number of times. Plus, you don't have to tip them as much later. Posted by: TexasJew at May 01, 2011 01:38 AM (uR5Zf) Heck, I talked a waitress into kissing me at the table while I was having lunch with someone else. Hot little Asian honey, too. *sigh*

Posted by: eman: Japanese Babe Rescue Team at April 30, 2011 08:53 PM (p2AIq)

519 Faith No More's Angel Dust and King for a Day, Fool for a Lifetime were modern masterpieces, IMO.

Posted by: Genetic Tunder at April 30, 2011 08:53 PM (mfQD5)

520

 Had "rules" against it, in fact

Me too.  Still do.

 Of course, it didn't stop me from picking my ex- wife up at her restaurant...but I did that over a two-year period.  Should have just fucked the cute waitress she worked with and saved myself a decade of bullshit. 

I have taken many women home from where they work, but it's a tougher road to hoe because everyone tries that shit.

Posted by: garrett at April 30, 2011 08:55 PM (6+RxA)

521 Never.  Been.  Turned. Down.  All you gotta do is ask, cj.  Doesn't mean I got a whole lotta second dates, but I got enough and the one that counted.  All I'm saying.  ASK.  Just ask.

Posted by: Papa Editor at April 30, 2011 08:56 PM (6neGz)

522

Faith No More's Angel Dust

Got the MFSL re-issue of that last week.  Love that album.

Posted by: garrett at April 30, 2011 08:56 PM (6+RxA)

523 Oh, and by the way, that "just ask" advice came from a chick early on in my high school days.  She was right.

Posted by: Papa Editor at April 30, 2011 08:57 PM (6neGz)

524 Should have just fucked the cute waitress she worked with and saved myself a decade of bullshit. Posted by: garrett at May 01, 2011 01:55 AM (6+RxA) Don't get me started. (Kids aside, of course.)

Posted by: eman: Japanese Babe Rescue Team at April 30, 2011 08:58 PM (p2AIq)

525 I am out too, Nite all

Posted by: robtr at April 30, 2011 08:59 PM (MtwBb)

526 Me, too. Good night, everyone!

Posted by: Genetic Tunder at April 30, 2011 09:00 PM (mfQD5)

527 Posted by: Papa Editor at May 01, 2011 01:56 AM (6neGz) I believe you. That's a proud record, too. Can't make the same claim. A little scar tissue helps in the long run, I think.

Posted by: eman: Japanese Babe Rescue Team at April 30, 2011 09:00 PM (p2AIq)

528 Should have just fucked the cute waitress she worked with and saved myself a decade of bullshit.

Posted by: garrett at May 01, 2011 01:55 AM (6+RxA)



Don't get me started. (Kids aside, of course.)

Posted by: eman: Japanese Babe Rescue Team at May 01, 2011 01:58 AM (p2AIq)

I get along great with my ex, have for the past 5 years anyway.  That's when I sent off my last child support check and didn't have to deal with her any more.

Posted by: GGE of the Moron Horde at April 30, 2011 09:00 PM (f4gk9)

529 528 Oh, and by the way, that "just ask" advice came from a chick early on in my high school days. She was right.

Posted by: Papa Editor at May 01, 2011 01:57 AM (6neGz)

Absolutely.

As with all lessons in my life, I learned that one late.

Woe is me, all is lost, the end is nigh, etc.

Posted by: Merovign, Dark Lord of the Sith at April 30, 2011 09:00 PM (bxiXv)

530 chemjeff, you also need the first three Replacements albums.

Posted by: garrett at April 30, 2011 09:01 PM (6+RxA)

531 Yeah, time to look at chicks, read a bit, and recharge.

Posted by: eman: Japanese Babe Rescue Team at April 30, 2011 09:01 PM (p2AIq)

532 Can't make the same claim. A little scar tissue helps in the long run, I think.

Posted by: eman: Japanese Babe Rescue Team at May 01, 2011 02:00 AM (p2AIq)

Oh, there's scar tissue.  Just from the subsequent dealings after the first dates.  Oh, is there scar tissue.  And yes, it's VERY helpful.

Posted by: Papa Editor at April 30, 2011 09:01 PM (6neGz)

533 ed - gonna get a ride in tomorrow?   Looks like the weather is going to break, here, tomorrow morning.  That means you should be having a bluebird day, over there.

Posted by: garrett at April 30, 2011 09:03 PM (6+RxA)

534 I don't think so.  It is supposed to be the nicest day of the year, so far, but we may be getting together with runningrn, then have a whole house to unpack.

I'll be driving by everyone on their rides wishing I was, though. 

Posted by: Papa Editor at April 30, 2011 09:05 PM (6neGz)

535 I make Jimmy Page look like a droopy-eyed armless child.  My band is the most original band in the history of originality.  Suck it.

Posted by: Trey Anastasio at April 30, 2011 09:07 PM (1fanL)

536

Dude.  Get out there for an hour and a half or so...then do something nice for the ladies when you get back.  This Spring isn't looking like it is going to afford much riding weather. 

Sieze the Carp!

Posted by: garrett at April 30, 2011 09:07 PM (6+RxA)

537

Posted by: Trey Anastasio at May 01, 2011 02:07 AM (1fanL)

 

The Rufinol wore off!  Welcome back FUBAR.

Posted by: garrett at April 30, 2011 09:09 PM (6+RxA)

538 Dude, got church in the morning.  Out @ noon, then lunch.  Then unpack.  I really, really wish I could, but it's not likely.  The wife would kill me.  Plus, I'm spent.  Really spent.  I've spent the last three weeks moving and I couldn't get a single moment to myself today.  Phone kept ringing and it was Dutch Harbor... All. Day. Long.  Even tried to nap, but that was interrupted pretty quickly. 

I suspect tomorrow will be very similar.

Posted by: Papa Editor at April 30, 2011 09:11 PM (6neGz)

539

The Rufinol wore off!  Welcome back FUBAR.

Posted by: garrett at May 01, 2011 02:09 AM (6+RxA)

That's why I keep coming back here.  No, not the abuse; the clever, clever Morons.

Posted by: FUBAR at April 30, 2011 09:11 PM (1fanL)

540

I suspect tomorrow will be very similar.

 

Damn, I feel for you.  That won't keep me off the trails, though. 

The thought of not being on the trainer has me climbing the walls!

Posted by: garrett at April 30, 2011 09:13 PM (6+RxA)

541 No one wants to win this hockey game (NSH v VAN). Posted by: Y-not at May 01, 2011 12:08 AM Nashville finally learned the lesson the Blackhawks taught the NHL about the overrated Luongobyebye: high glove side... every.time. Rinne was amazing. He is going to steal this series for Nashville as the Canucks have been playing like crap for the past 5 games. 0 goals at home, 3 goals in Chicago, 2 goals (in OT) at home, 1 goal at home, 1 goal at home (in 2OT). 7 goals in 5 games for the "mighty Canucks". Frauds. They were exposed as such by the Blackhawks and now they can't muster more than 1 goal a game against Nashville. Whoever wins the DET-SJ series is going to demolish the Canucks if they manage some luck to get by Nashville. The only reason Nashville might not win the series is because their offense is horrible. So many times they controlled puck possession in the offensive zone and so many times they didn't get a damn SOG. And their PP is even more atrocious. Instead of being on the attack and getting good SOG, they spent most of their PPs either chasing the puck into their own zone or defending against Vancouver attacking SH, including giving up a SH goal. Pathetic. But I think both the Blackhawks and Predators have exposed the Canucks as frauds. They are not the best team in the NHL. They are a regular season team, nothing more. Come playoff time, they are just average.

Posted by: Clyde Shelton at April 30, 2011 09:13 PM (NITzp)

542

Luongo has no glove and he can't take ANY physical imposition...Chicago should have taken a run or two at him in that Game 7.  Would have made all the difference in the world.

 

Posted by: garrett at April 30, 2011 09:15 PM (6+RxA)

543 Luongo has no glove and he can't take ANY physical imposition...Chicago should have taken a run or two at him in that Game 7. Would have made all the difference in the world. Posted by: garrett at May 01, 2011 02:15 AM He cannot handle ANY traffic in front of him. Get a man in front of him to create a screen and he is less than average. Blackhawks did that to him last two years with Big Buff. We did that to him again this year in Games 4-5 and a little in Game 6. Game 7 we got away from that. Of course, in Game 7 we couldn't even keep possession in the offensive zone hardly at all or get any SOG. Plus I think Vancouver's game plan was "Luongo sucks, so let's not leave this game up to him, let's just put 3 guys in front of the net to block every shot his way and take the game out of his hands". We had no lanes to shoot or pass it seemed all game. And our PP was ridiculously inept as well. But, after all that, we had Toews' heroics and if Sharpie blasts that PP snipe 6 inches higher, we're in Round 2. ugh... I'm rooting for Nashville to continue Luongobyebye's streak of never advancing past Round 2. heh

Posted by: Clyde Shelton at April 30, 2011 09:24 PM (NITzp)

544

yep. 

Knock him (Lou) down once and the game is yours for the taking.

Posted by: garrett at April 30, 2011 09:26 PM (6+RxA)

545 The ONT passed in the presence of friends and family Saturday night.

A new ONT is expected to be appointed tomorrow evening.

Respects may be paid on the Sunday book thread.

Posted by: Merovign, Dark Lord of the Sith at April 30, 2011 09:36 PM (bxiXv)

546

Respects may be paid on the Sunday book thread.

Posted by: Merovign, Dark Lord of the Sith at May 01, 2011 02:36 AM (bxiXv)

Don't do that.  You might piss off Monty .  Use the Open morning thread.

Posted by: buzzion at April 30, 2011 09:44 PM (oVQFe)

547 Alas, poor ONT. I knew him, Horatio. I knew him.

Posted by: GGE of the Moron Horde at April 30, 2011 09:50 PM (f4gk9)

548

I read Obama's jokes on politico. It's a left trash site but it's the only place I could find. He totally bombeed with the jokes it seems. Very unfunny. They were better last year.

Btw politico has the best pic of the douche in chief on their headline. check it out for lolz

Posted by: Flapjackmaka at April 30, 2011 10:11 PM (u8JAM)

549 OT/ I am a Catholic, not a good one, and may He have mercy on my wretched moron soul. That being said, there has been a bit of "pomp and circumstance" as of late regarding Easter Bunnies and such, on the White House lawn which have zero relevance to the Christian holy day. Since our president is a self proclaimed Christian, no doubt he made a statement to proclaim/observe this solemn occasion as EVERY previous president of the United States has done. The Hell you say, he did not??? Well, that is NOT a simple "Faux Pas". I am not part of the White House staff assigned to uphold protocol, but I will advise our elected officials that soon, the Catholic community will cry tears of joy as John Paul II is elevated to the status of Saint. Yes, he was only a mortal. But he not only talked the talk, he walked the walk. When this ordinary man spoke, whether you agree or not, he DID command attention from the president of the greatest free country in the West, Ronald Reagan, as well as a trusted ally Prime Minister Thatcher. At this point I would be remiss if I did not mention an electrician by the name of Lech Walesa. He and many other brave citizens took a stand against what Ronald Reagan called the Evil Empire (which caused The Left in the US to have a severe case of the vapors, if not a complete stroke) Finally, even Boris Yeltsin and Mikhail Gorbachev could no longer hide from the hand of G_d. as when they sent their Kosmonavts into outer space on their final mission they were citizens of the godforsaken Soviet Union, which collapsed. When they landed, they were citizens of Russia. At that point of time there was much celebration amongst repressed Christians in Eastern Bloc countries. Only to be again subjected to criminal elements desperate to hold onto whatever power they could sustain. Anyways, I apologize for being verbose, as most of you morons are much more intelligent than I. My desire is to not let history be forgotten or revised as The Left is want to do. For those who are interested, here is a nice link which helps to explain things. http://tinyurl.com/5rptj7a

Posted by: political correctness czar at April 30, 2011 11:52 PM (UPNlB)

550

553,

My first thought upon seeing that picture was: "I bet that bow tie is a fucking clip on"

Posted by: Alex at April 30, 2011 11:57 PM (J2ejK)

551 Cheetahs are descended from royal best hiking GPS pets throughout Africa, and are relatively easily returned to trained status.

Other big cats are wild and more dangerous.

Not that a Cheetah can't kill you, but I know of only a few attacks on humans, most a result of poor handling in captivity. There was one rash of attacks I know of in the wild, no fatalities.

Posted by: Tom Beard at May 01, 2011 01:11 AM (n0Ydj)

552 Something interesting to read while waiting for the COB to coffee up - via WeaselZippers

Posted by: Jean at May 01, 2011 01:40 AM (7P7Ij)

553 Thats some scary spam at 557.

Posted by: Jean at May 01, 2011 01:41 AM (7P7Ij)

554

553,

My first thought upon seeing that picture was: "I bet that bow tie is a fucking clip on"

Better than the strap-on he had on later in the night.

Posted by: Wild Bill at May 01, 2011 01:53 AM (nap8Y)

555 ...moral of the story, turn off the boob tube before capturing the moments of our life.

Posted by: by any other name at May 01, 2011 02:14 AM (H+LJc)

556 Peter Hitchens:

"If you go back to the present Queen’s Coronation service in 1953, you will find it was a profoundly British occasion – a -celebration, reaching back far into the past, of our long and happy sovereignty over ourselves.

It was also a straightforwardly Protestant Christian ceremony, based on ideas of self-discipline and self-restraint that we have entirely abandoned in the years since. The two things are completely bound together. You cannot remain free unless you can govern yourself."

Posted by: by any other name at May 01, 2011 02:17 AM (H+LJc)

557 As Thomas Jefferson wrote to Marquis Lafayette in 1817, "Ignorance and bigotry, like other insanities, are incapable of self-government."

Posted by: by any other name at May 01, 2011 02:20 AM (H+LJc)

558 561 ...moral of the story, turn off the boob tube before capturing the moments of our life.

Posted by: by any other name at May 01, 2011 07:14 AM (H+LJc)

Yeah, that too!

Posted by: CDR M at May 01, 2011 02:43 AM (Mv/2X)

559 That cheetah lady does have nice legs. And they go right up and make an ass out of themselves.

Posted by: PoconoJoe at May 01, 2011 02:48 AM (KSYYf)

560 Unchain the writers and feed them. And make sure they have plenty of ink for the day's work.

Posted by: melvin at May 01, 2011 03:23 AM (3OCZw)

561

hmmm....There's a nice big "Vote Monday, Vote Liberal" ad at the top of my page. That was a waste of money.

Posted by: Canadian Infidel at May 01, 2011 03:24 AM (GKQDR)

562 What a great kid....and I'm shocked it was in the LA Times....

Reporting from Arlington, Va.—

Rosemary Brown is standing over the grave of her son at Arlington National Cemetery when someone catches her eye. It's a boy in khaki shorts and muddy shoes, juggling a clunky camera and the Motorola Xoom he got for his 17th birthday five days earlier.

"May I ask what you're doing?" Brown inquires. The boy begins to peck at the Xoom tablet, and in seconds the image that Brown has come all the way from Cartwright, Okla., to see fills the screen. It's the white marble headstone of Army Special Forces Staff Sgt. Jason L. Brown, killed by small-arms fire in Afghanistan three years ago this day. Her face brightens.

"Most of Jason's family and friends are in Oklahoma and Texas. For them to be able to see his grave…," she says, her voice breaking.

Richard "Ricky" Gilleland III — 11th-grader and Junior Future Business Leaders of America computer ace — has succeeded where the Army failed: He has created the only digitized record of Iraq and Afghanistan veterans laid to rest at Arlington.

http://tinyurl.com/3r7qf9j

Kid's website: http://tinyurl.com/5tkl6ts

Posted by: Tami at May 01, 2011 03:28 AM (VuLos)

Posted by: venoous at May 01, 2011 03:07 PM (vG8jQ)

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