May 30, 2006

Greenhouse Gas = Bigger, Stronger Poison Ivy
— LauraW.

Their title: "Greenhouse gas breeds venomous vines"

I detect no alarmism in this study whatsoever.

In the study, Mohan and her co-workers pumped extra CO2 over three large circular plots of North Carolina pine forest. For six years, the plants inside were exposed to an extra 200 parts per million of CO2 over today's atmospheric concentration of about 380 parts per million, roughly what we might expect from pollution by the middle of this century.

I hope they bought credits for all that carbon.

Mohan's experiment sought to check whether the plants shoot up in the wild, as they do in greenhouse experiments. "Yes, dramatically," was the answer. The poisonous ivies grew at double the rate of plants grown under regular CO2 levels, whereas woody species on average tend to grow around 31% faster. The elevated CO2 also created a nastier version of urushiol poison, the team showed.

Its still poison ivy, though, right? It doesn't become invisible or diguise itself as some other plant or trick me into making a big salad out of it?

As long as it still just hangs out on trees and looks like Poison Ivy and doesn't become ambulatory, I'm thinking not much has changed in my life.

I'm curious if they've tried this experiment with wine grapes yet.

UPDATE: From the comments to this post, Dave in Texas:

They pumped more of what a plant uses in photosynthesis to generate plant material and oxygen, and they GREW FASTER?
Well knock me over with a feather.

Just a heads up; Dave's expressions of surprise are sometimes not entirely sincere.

Posted by: LauraW. at 10:14 AM | Comments (62)
Post contains 279 words, total size 2 kb.

1 If America will not wake up to the fact that Bigger, Stronger Poison Ivy is a real threat, then they do not deserve to have me as their esteemed leader.

Posted by: Al Gore at May 30, 2006 10:18 AM (KeOQp)

2 This could be fantastic news! I mean, with the rampant threat posed by overdevelopment, sprawl, deforestation, and the raping of our environment generally, shouldn't we be PRAYING (well, if we were 'praying' people) for some way to grow plants faster?

Well, now we got it! It's like some fantastic magic bullet! How much CO2 do we need to produce to make serious improvements in forest health. I'm willing to burn as much fossil fuel as it takes!

Posted by: Nanman at May 30, 2006 10:25 AM (0Jq33)

3 hmmm, more fuel for the plants, bigger plants? What is this madness?

So, if the plants got bigger, did they suck up more CO2? And if the planet is getting warmer, why isn't it getting warmer? And is that picure of the polar bear swimming in the ocean taken during the spring thaw?

Posted by: joeindc44 at May 30, 2006 10:26 AM (K0x/A)

4 (bad jon stewart reference)

Okay so they tried it on poison ivy. . . but have they tried this experiment. . . . . on WEED!?

Posted by: Wickedpinto at May 30, 2006 10:27 AM (QTv8u)

5 And of course, to state the obvious, they chose poison ivy.

Not a food plant, not a flower, not a grain. POISON ivy.

Yup, no alarmism at all.

Posted by: Jay at May 30, 2006 10:28 AM (rD+kE)

6 The really bad news is that-- like pandas and bamboo, like koalas and eucaplyptus-- poison ivy is the preferred foodstuff of Manbearpig, which means we should expect a corresponding growth in the most serious threat facing our planet today.

Posted by: benjamin at May 30, 2006 10:29 AM (dTJxx)

7 I wonder if this has anything to do with the explosion in breast sizes in China. Who knew that CO2 was so helpful? Let's make some more.

Posted by: joeindc44 at May 30, 2006 10:33 AM (K0x/A)

8 So what does it do to wheat? Rice? Corn? Barley? Switchgrass?

I'm thinking we might just be able to globally warm and CO2-pollute our way into greater agricultural abundance and possibly energy independence along the way.

Science is grand, I tell ya.

Posted by: leoncaruthers at May 30, 2006 10:34 AM (7iTO9)

9 Okay so they tried it on poison ivy. . . but have they tried this experiment. . . . . on WEED!?

Any good hydroponics and indoor horticulture supply shop sells CO2 enrichment tanks and regulators. It makes an appreciable difference in yield, so I hear.

Posted by: Alex at May 30, 2006 10:35 AM (fgyj8)

10 Manbearpig.

Fucking PERFECT!

I love SP ref's.

Posted by: Wickedpinto at May 30, 2006 10:35 AM (QTv8u)

11 No alarmism. Nooo, not at aaaaallllll.

Perhaps the author of the article has been reading too much hentai?

Posted by: CrankyProf at May 30, 2006 10:36 AM (S9R+k)

12 For six years, the plants inside were exposed to an extra 200 parts per million of CO2 over today's atmospheric concentration

They pumped more of what a plant uses in photosynthesis to generate plant material and oxygen, and they GREW FASTER?

Well knock me over with a feather.

I think we can handle this little problem by pumping in a few parts per million more RoundUp™ and we'll keep those nasty poinson vines under control just fine.

Posted by: Dave in Texas at May 30, 2006 10:46 AM (pzen5)

13 Actually, I've heard that poison ivy isn't very susceptible to Roundup. I knew a guy that had some poison ivy growing under the pine trees in his back yard. He got some special spray just for poison ivy. In three years, all the trees died and the poison ivy began a comeback.

Posted by: chris at May 30, 2006 10:57 AM (ze3EB)

14 If 560 parts per million is expected to be the norm by say, 256, then that means that the 200 parts per million artificially introduced would only occur at rates of 4 parts per million per year, over 50 years, you would end up with larger healthier tree's, with larger more and more obstructing canopies, and the trees themselves would kill off the poison ivy, at least the above ground parts that would lose access to the sun.

This kinda reminds of some stupid thing a friend used to tell me about how bad coffee is for me "you know if you drink about 150 cups of coffe the caffeien would kill you? Well no shit, if I drank 150 cups of water I would die. They arbitrarily increase the environmental affect of CO2 by 70 percent, overnight and pass that off as a rational study of global warming affects?

Posted by: Wickedpinto at May 30, 2006 11:02 AM (QTv8u)

15 Damn! I had something stupid to say about RoundUp but Dave beat me to it (not that Dave sounded stupid, etc.) Instead, allow me to offer a helpful suggestion. When poison ivy starts spreading like kudzu, just mosey on over to the local golf course and offer the superintendant a case of beer for a few ounces of a product called Prosecutor. That shit makes RoundUp look like watered-down Kool Aid.

Posted by: ErikW at May 30, 2006 11:07 AM (xO15o)

16 Feeed meeee!

FEED ME !

Posted by: Poison Ivy at May 30, 2006 11:12 AM (KeOQp)

17 Its still poison ivy, though, right? It doesn't become invisible or diguise itself as some other plant or trick me into making a big salad out of it?

Worse... it makes you watch "Batman and Robin" over and over and over and over until your brain turns to goo and dribbles out your nose.

Posted by: tina at May 30, 2006 11:13 AM (XXFUK)

18 I'll bet the damn pine trees grew faster too but nobody felt like measuring them.

chris, I've always had pretty good results with RU and poison ivy (built on a tree covered lot 8 years ago, and my backyard was overrun with that stuff - I'm pretty allergic to poison ivy so I wanted it gone).

The directions do say mix it at a stronger concentration, and apply when the daytime temp is warm (over 85? I forget, anyway it doesn't work if the plant isn't really growing).

Incidentally, even a plant that's been dead a year can still have the oils on it that your skin reacts to... be careful clearing the dead stuff away too.

Posted by: Dave in Texas at May 30, 2006 11:15 AM (pzen5)

19 I'm thinking this can lead to an obvious and inexpensive solution to our immigration problem.

Posted by: Uniball at May 30, 2006 11:16 AM (27iEn)

20 Good Gawd, Tina.

I never was scared of global warming until now.

Al Gore in '08

Posted by: stace at May 30, 2006 11:20 AM (A56/D)

21 Ok mind experiment here.

The envirowhackos generally make a big shucks about burning fossil fuels. Ok. But they don't make a big deal about burning biofuels, like biodiesel. Why is that? Why their general reasoning is that they say the carbon released by the diesel engine was captured by the soy plant so the cycle is actually carbon neutral.

Ok say I. But what if I make a batch of biodiesel this year but don't burn it till next year? Does that mean the biodiesel lost its carbon neutrality? Hmmmm. I figure I have a 70% chance they will say no. Ok. Well what if I didn't burn that fuel till 2010? What say ye environwhacko? If they still maintain carbon neuteral then we got their ass.

What difference does it make? Now we are only arguing about time frames. If I can store biodiesel till 2010, then I should be able to do the same for a lump of coal made 2million years ago.

New bumper sticker -- "I am not releasing greenhouse gasses, I am fertilizing Giaia."

Should make a few heads spin.

Posted by: JohnMc at May 30, 2006 11:25 AM (cMd8l)

22 I'll bet the damn pine trees grew faster too but nobody felt like measuring them.

Actually they did mention tree's, not pine tree's I guess, cuz it just said "woody species" did grow faster, but at a rate of 31% rather than "almost double" in the case of poison ivy.

The Alarmism (and someone is gonna say "you guys are focusing on the Poison Ivy when there were other plants) actually the only "plant" mentioned was Poison Ivy, the rest were tree's. they mention "vines" but they clearly put the focus only on Poison Ivy Vines, without pointing out, as laura mentioned "have they tried this on grape vines yet" it's a "look at me article" overlooking a lot of things.

Oh, and it was pine tree's, North Carolina Pines, and they batch them all in as woody plants, but what about the more floral tree's? Like Oaks, and such? What about leafy foodstuffs? What about tomatoes? In 10 years are we gonna have an article about how tomatoes have become so large, that they have developed free will? and we would need "Napolean Bonaparte Junior" (I think thats the right reference) to combat Global Warming, which is not actually what is being discussed, but rather global carbon dioxide levels.

Posted by: Wickedpinto at May 30, 2006 11:30 AM (QTv8u)

23 JohnMc, even if the enviro wackos might agree with your hypothesis you are still evil, cuz what you are describing is a "futures market" of environmental value.

HUSH! you say! that is what Gore was talking about? But Proffit, and market related processes are EVIhL! I thought?

Posted by: Wickedpinto at May 30, 2006 11:33 AM (QTv8u)

24 If I remember that whole photosynthesis thing in Biology class, doesn't pumping more CO2 into a plant mean it produces more O2? Did they bleed off the resulting surge of oxygen to keep the CO2 concentration at the levels they wanted? I suppose I could be less apathetic and go read the study, but I just don't see any value in doing that.

Posted by: Cautiously Pessimistic at May 30, 2006 11:34 AM (JKlMI)

25 Measles make you bumpy
And mumps'll make you lumpy
And chicken pox'll make you jump and twitch
A common cold'll fool ya
And whooping cough'll cool ya
But poison ivy, Lord'll make you itch!!

You're gonna need an ocean of calamine lotion
You'll be scratchin' like a hound
The minute you start to mess around (with)

Poison iv-y-y-y-y, poison iv-y-y-y-y
Late at night while you're sleepin' poison ivy comes a'creepin'
Arou-ou-ou-ou-ou-ound

Posted by: The Coasters at May 30, 2006 11:37 AM (pItxv)

26 I'd also like to add that Prosecutor is essentially the same as RoundUp but in a highly concentrated form. As mentioned, you can mix it to any ratio you would like but at least you can take pleasure in knowing that you're probably breaking about a dozen environmental laws while spraying it!

Posted by: ErikW at May 30, 2006 11:40 AM (xO15o)

27 In 10 years are we gonna have an article about how tomatoes have become so large, that they have developed free will?

LOL!

Posted by: iamfelix at May 30, 2006 11:41 AM (pItxv)

28 Wickedpinto said --

"JohnMc, even if the enviro wackos might agree with your hypothesis you are still evil, cuz what you are describing is a "futures market" of environmental value."

And trading in carbon credits is not a market? Pleeeeeaze....

But I get your point wicked.

Posted by: JohnMc at May 30, 2006 11:53 AM (cMd8l)

29 Monstrous poison Ivy. A lesbian Batwoman, Dutch pedophilliacs and Big Breasted Chinese women.

My god, you have hear the makings of the all-time greatest novel ever!

Posted by: Reddish Jode at May 30, 2006 11:55 AM (KeOQp)

30 Another thing that is kinda funny, is. . . .this is an experiment that consists of increasing the local CO2 levels by 60% (not 70% like I said, sorry)

Why join Kyoto, when the very people telling us to join are increasing our CO2 output arbitrarily to validate their point?

Also, another silliness of this, is the test of the emission of "greenhouse" gasses at ground level, when a global greenhouse requires high altitude levels.

CO2 has a tendency of obeying physical laws, and having hier concentrations at lower elevations, with the exception of ACTUALLY climatic affects like, this new thing called. . . . wind. So my guess is that before we have a global tinderbox of extraordinary surface warming, we will have suffocated from a lack of oxygen.

Posted by: Wickedpinto at May 30, 2006 11:58 AM (QTv8u)

31 Similar studies showing major increases in crop plant productivity under similar elevated CO2 levels. I'd say 40% increase yield is a fair tradeoff for some extra poison ivy.

Posted by: Clark at May 30, 2006 11:59 AM (+aBB8)

32 Monstrous poison Ivy. A lesbian Batwoman, Dutch pedophilliacs and Big Breasted Chinese women.

My god, you have hear the makings of the all-time greatest novel ever!

Posted by Reddish Jode

Thank you Reddish Jode, I have just developed a life plan. Avoid poison, Ivy and dutchlandistan(really, who's ever been there?) and spend the rest of my time masturbating.

Posted by: Wickedpinto at May 30, 2006 12:01 PM (QTv8u)

33 John Mc. the second paragraph was a sarcastic conversation with a hypothetical friend (who is much like most of my friends "hypothetical," but I will sulk in my own misery later) about the carbon credits Gore trades in.

But I'm glad you got my point.

Posted by: Wickedpinto at May 30, 2006 12:03 PM (QTv8u)

34 I'm thinking this can lead to an obvious and inexpensive solution to our immigration problem.

Uniball, I like the way you think.

Posted by: PattyAnn at May 30, 2006 12:06 PM (ypCSv)

35 Dear Coasters,

I hope you don't mind that when I was in the Army we had a version that went like this:

Vietna-aa-aa-aam, Vi-e-eht-naam
Late at night while you're sleeping
Charlie Cong comes a creepin'
All aroooounnnnd.

Posted by: BrewFan at May 30, 2006 12:11 PM (0AD+O)

36 :-) Brewfan

I imagine today's troops might parody "Little Egypt" - or maybe the border patrol could work up something with "Down In Mexico."

Posted by: The Coasters at May 30, 2006 12:25 PM (pItxv)

37 Ain't no sense in looking down, ain't no six-pack on the ground.

Ain't no sense in looking back, Jodie's got your Caddillac.

I know a girl who dresses in black, makes here living on her back.

Posted by: Purple Avenger at May 30, 2006 12:29 PM (gf5iT)

38 Tim Blair points out that poison ivy is not "poison" to every animal.
Unlike humans, many animals don’t have adverse reactions to poison ivy, according to an expert in Penn State’s College of Agricultural Sciences. “In fact, for woodpeckers, warblers, vireos and many other birds, poison ivy’s berries are a preferred food,” says Jim Finley, professor of forest resources. “Deer, black bears, muskrats and rabbits eat the fruit, stems and leaves. For these animals, poison ivy’s eye-catching early-fall color will act as a food marker rather than a poison warning."

The More You Know ~*

Posted by: dorkafork at May 30, 2006 12:32 PM (ksDNy)

39 So wait. You mean that plants, the ones that turn CO2 into O2, respond to a lack of balance in their environment by trying to impose balance in their environment? Is that, like, the Circle Of Life?

Posted by: SomeJoe at May 30, 2006 12:34 PM (YQVRP)

40 My Dad was immune to poison ivy - used to clean up making bets with other kids that he would roll in it. Passed the immunity to all 4 of his kids. Several years back, I was on Belle Isle (Detroit River) with a friend - With all Detroit's fiscal woes, it's gotten very shabby & overgrown, and there was some huge poison ivy that we ended up stomping through. I emerged totally unscathed, but my friend had to be hospitalized overnight with a really bad reaction.

Posted by: iamfelix at May 30, 2006 12:38 PM (pItxv)

41 iamfelix,

Actually mythbusters was having a "vodka myth" rundown, and one of them was the vodka limits the reaction to poison ivy. One of the things that they shared is that "70% of people are alergic to poison ivy" so "poison ivy" being "poison" is based on a hystemine reaction of allergy, rather than actually being poison.

then during the show, all but 2 people in the entire shop were immune to the oils in poison ivy, or at leat at the quantities they were shared through direct, and PRESSURED contact with the leaves. That means at the mythbusters shop, 90% of people were no longer allergic to poison ivy.

Then there was a random bit of info I read later, that the last broad study about the affects of poison ivy's allergic stimulus are more than 40 years old.

My dads a little short of 60, and all of the opinions he has on all things scientific are worth approximately. . . . let me find the word. . . .SHIT in my book and he knows it, thats why he mentions his silly opinons, because he stopped reading forever ago, or at least reading for info.

so, while a 40 year old study is prolly more valuable than the teachings of my father, but. . . they are quickly approaching that sort of respect.

create NEW studies. After all the point of a study isn't to have a lasting answer that is fact for all of eternity, but it is in fact a field of STUDY! that must be practiced throughout all time, and all situations all all changes.

Evolution PEOPLE! not just based on mutation, but also environmental factors. Somewhere down the line, we might have a mutation, or diet, or practice that limits the affect of poison ivy. and forty years is enough to touch on the last 2 factors.

Posted by: Wickedpinto at May 30, 2006 12:54 PM (QTv8u)

42 So they released "greenhouse gasses" the study the effects of "global warming".

Does anyone else see the disconnect here?

Posted by: N. O'Brain at May 30, 2006 01:08 PM (PmWhP)

43 So they released "greenhouse gasses" the study the effects of "global warming".

Yep. Beat me to the punch, n_o.

Posted by: kelly at May 30, 2006 01:34 PM (peQr+)

44 There is unrest in the forest,
There is trouble with the trees,
For the ivies want more sunlight
And the oaks ignore their pleas.

The trouble say the ivies,
(from their position on the right)
Is that the oaks are just too lofty
When discussing enivironmental plight.
But the oaks can't help their feelings
If they like the way they're made.
And they wonder why the ivies
Don't believe what Algore says

There is trouble in the forest,
And the industries all have fled,
As the ivies scream overregulation
And the oaks want socialism instead

So the ivies formed an alliance
With the corporate right.
"The oaks are just too stupid
To allow us any light."
Now there's no more oak oppression,
For they passed a noble law,
And the CO2 emissions
Solved the problem once and for all.

Posted by: The Warden at May 30, 2006 01:43 PM (rkK3q)

45 I knew a girl who lived on a hill. She won't do it but her sister will.

Posted by: BrewFan at May 30, 2006 01:47 PM (0AD+O)

46 more co2 = more plant growth = more co2 sequestration = there is no crisis; the earth takes care of itself.

Posted by: reliapundit at May 30, 2006 02:41 PM (teJ2H)

47 So, Poison Ivy grows bigger, better, stronger.

Anybody do the test for corn, soybeans, wheat, green olives, apple trees...???

Posted by: Steve O at May 30, 2006 02:55 PM (R0Csm)

48 I do not understand why it is never written the Sun is burning 30% brighter now than ever before. I looked it up.

It is not us causing global warming. However, I think the big guy is trying to get our attention, telling us to stop buggering each other in the ass, stop NAMBLA, stop abortion as birth control, etc...

Posted by: Leatherneck at May 30, 2006 03:04 PM (D2g/j)

49 Anybody do the test for corn, soybeans, wheat, green olives, apple trees...???

Steve O, your typical fascist simplisme amuses me.
You right-wingnuts are only interested in plants that can be exploited for your own greedy ends!

Hello, McFly! Did you even READ the article??

This poison ivy, ITS HUGE.
And ITS SCARY-STRONG.
And its coming, Steve. Its coming for you and your kids and your Mom, if you don't all buy a Prius immediately.

Hold me.

Posted by: lauraw at May 30, 2006 03:11 PM (o6H31)

50 I knew about the poison ivy berries being eaten by birds, but not that mammals ate it too.

One of my neighbors is clinically insane, and on a rare trip outdoors she found poison ivy on her property. She had the town come out to look at it, then she claimed that it must have come from our yard, and that we were harboring and cultivating it.

Everybody on our street has poison ivy in their yard. We all back up to a friggin' swamp/nature preserve!

And anyway, birds spread it by eating the berries and pooping the seeds on the fly.

But the guy from the town still made my husband defoliate part of the backyard to satiate the insane neighbor.

Posted by: lauraw at May 30, 2006 03:17 PM (o6H31)

51 I am NOT clinically insane!!

I have insights and understanding beyond your comprehension. I know you are growing that poison vine for export, and your own evil purposes. You're not fooling anyone missy!

You ship it all over the WORLD!


(laurence, can I have my pills now?)

Posted by: lauraw's neighbor at May 30, 2006 04:13 PM (s7t6E)

52 More of the malarkey from these wackos and the usial blabber from AL GORE and the nut cases at GREENPEACE what next GIANT SIZED ROBINS BIG ENOUGH TO EAT ANACONDAS LIKE WORMS

Posted by: spurwing plover at May 30, 2006 05:22 PM (S97cI)

53 If I miss quote on the 30%, I am sorry.

I will go look it up again.

Posted by: Leatherneck at May 30, 2006 05:41 PM (D2g/j)

54 I live in an arid region and, under ordinary circumstances, have a hard time getting my lawn to stay green. One summer I experimented around with irrigating the grass with a sprinkler hooked up to a hose which all originated from a hydrant that stuck out of the wall of my house. I don't know if the water caused it to grow 31% faster or twice as fast as before, but I know I had to mow the shit repeatedly. Can somebody hook me up with some grant money and maybe clue me in as to where I can publish my findings? This has got to be at least as groundbreaking as the poison ivy study.

Posted by: Sticky B at May 30, 2006 08:37 PM (EJgMZ)

55 Actually, I've heard that poison ivy isn't very susceptible to Roundup.

As someone who has a very nice poison ivy crop in his yard every year, I can assure you that Round Up works wonderfully with the stuff. As Dave in Texas said, you hae to mix it stronger and not be afraid of what else you are going to kill. Recently, they ahve produced a Round Up specifically for poison ivy. It is mixed at the stronger concentration and bottled in a spray bottle with a nozzle that better focuses the spray so as to avoid as much overspray as possible.

Posted by: Steve L. at May 31, 2006 02:26 AM (hpZf2)

56 I'm sorry, Sticky B, but you obviously are in the pocket of Big Water interests and do not care about Gaia.

Posted by: tina at May 31, 2006 02:28 AM (XXFUK)

57 More of the malarkey from these wackos and the usial blabber from AL GORE and the nut cases at GREENPEACE what next GIANT SIZED ROBINS BIG ENOUGH TO EAT ANACONDAS LIKE WORMS

I bet those robins would taste WONDERFUL smothered in hot wing sauce and dipped in bleu cheese.

Posted by: CrankyProf at May 31, 2006 02:47 AM (S9R+k)

58 KFBO Kentucky Fried Borrowing Owl

Posted by: spurwing plover at May 31, 2006 04:11 AM (A09bm)

59 I wonder if this applies similarly to weeds and other faster-growing nuisance plants, i.e. exposed to the same nourishment, hardier plants grow faster than say redwoods? Because so far I tend to suspect their little "phenomenon" has more to do with this than with Mother Gaia reacting in Crichton-esque fashion to our rape of the environment with anti-human mutations...

Posted by: Scott at May 31, 2006 08:32 AM (f8958)

60 From the news item:

"trees, which use extra carbon to grow more wood"

I wish I were a tree. It would be nice to grow more wood.

Posted by: Tushar D at May 31, 2006 08:54 AM (h76y6)

61 If these "super-trees" start cranking out major oxygen, as trees are prone to do...interesting things could happen. We must recognize that the age of dinosaurs was one of much higher oxygen concentrations in the atmosphere (it was required to support their size).

Suppose in this more oxygen rich atmosphere that mutations start occuring adapted to it? Suppose little lawn lizards mutate back into T-Rex? Suppose house cats mutate back into saber tooth tigers? Suppose dragonflys mutate into those ones that had 3' wingspans!

The whole earth could become a huge Jurassic park with humans as breakfast, lunch and dinner.

The only hope to avert this crisis for humanity is to clearcut the forests and burn down the Amazon rain forest ASAP so those treacherous trees stop producing oxygen.

Posted by: Purple Avenger at May 31, 2006 09:58 AM (gf5iT)

62 Purple Avenger, save your effort: a more oxygen-rich atmosphere would likely mean more forest fires.

Posted by: lauraw at May 31, 2006 10:33 AM (Rxdk4)

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