April 26, 2006
— Ace I'm guilty of a lot of them.
I mean, right away:
Coin his own nickname.
Front and center; first entry on the list. Not a good sign.
As for the velcro-wallet-- no, I don't carry one, but I sure wish I were permitted to. Those things were dope! They went so well with a really nice OP long-sleeve t-shirt of some homo windsurfing across a sunset. And, of course, Vans.
But really, if you could link to the list, that'd be great.
Posted by: Gabriel Malor at April 26, 2006 09:02 AM (UBkoP)
Dude, seriously-- if you're gonna screw up the link, can't we at least get some girl-on-girl action again?
Dave at Garfield Ridge
Posted by: Dave at Garfield Ridge at April 26, 2006 09:02 AM (y1hCN)
Posted by: Gabriel Malor at April 26, 2006 09:03 AM (UBkoP)
Everybody knows it's supposed to be "he shoots he SCORES"
Posted by: Dave in Texas at April 26, 2006 09:08 AM (pzen5)
Posted by: spongeworthy at April 26, 2006 09:12 AM (uSomN)
Posted by: sandy burger at April 26, 2006 09:15 AM (K2rlS)
Posted by: Pepys at April 26, 2006 09:15 AM (E5tuw)
Posted by: sandy burger at April 26, 2006 09:20 AM (K2rlS)
But "For the win...!" is the standard.
When you miss say "THAT WAS THE MOST BLATANT NO-CALL IN THE HISTORY OF WESTERN CIVILIZATION," in the Bill Walton voice.
Number 13 on that list is "Tap on the glass." What? Where? Which? With what? Huh?
Posted by: Questions, Questions at April 26, 2006 09:20 AM (JLI/R)
Posted by: roc ingersol at April 26, 2006 09:22 AM (m2CN7)
Oooooo, big checkity-check there.
well, I'll just save some space and check "all of the above." That should about cover it.
Posted by: Mike at April 26, 2006 09:24 AM (AQGeh)
Well, yeah, I probably could have. I mean, this is *Ace* we're talking about here.
Dave at Garfield Ridge
Posted by: Dave at Garfield Ridge at April 26, 2006 09:27 AM (y1hCN)
Almost 20 years ago, Esquire ran a list of the 99 things a man should do before he turns 30. As we neared that magical age, we chanced to have a party where large quantities of alcohol were involved. Someone got a copy of that issue and we proceeded to spend the evening going through list telling sordid tales of a misspent youth.
Man, I miss that.
Posted by: Steve L. at April 26, 2006 09:29 AM (YIFeG)
Posted by: pistolero at April 26, 2006 09:34 AM (yGhBp)
31. End a conversation with "later skater.
I've never heard #31 in my life. Is that sentence purposely designed to incite violence? Any male who does either of these, no matter what age, deserves to have his ass kicked.
Posted by: steve_in_hb at April 26, 2006 09:56 AM (PIs8p)
Posted by: hutch1200 at April 26, 2006 10:01 AM (cz2Zx)
Posted by sandy burger
Posted by: alessandra at April 26, 2006 10:05 AM (n/PLG)
Posted by: hutch1200 at April 26, 2006 10:07 AM (cz2Zx)
Posted by: Dave S at April 26, 2006 10:11 AM (xAKxG)
Posted by: ErikW at April 26, 2006 11:09 AM (XZaZf)
Hey, you can't afford decent home-brewing equipment until you've been working a few years, so I don't think this really belongs on the list.
Besides, 20-somethings don't give a crap about how a beer tastes; they're more likely to just bong some Coors Light instead of bothering with the time and expense of a home brew.
Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to go open a bottle from the batch of beer my husband named after me...
Posted by: bbeck at April 26, 2006 12:45 PM (qF8q3)
There was also a conspicuous absence of any mention of videogames, fantasy sports, text messaging, or internet message boards on that list. Which leads me to believe the list was either written in 1985, or written by someone whose only connection with modern culture is through the small bits of his grandkids' conversations that he picks up between naps.
Other items that were included but didn't make the final edits:
60) Do a Mork from Ork impression.
61) Wear shoelaces in your Vans.
62) Forget to set your VCR to record Riptide.
63) Bet against the Kansas City Royals.
64) The headspin.
65) Wear long shorts.
66) Have a favorite Whammy on Press Your Luck.
67) Argue over which is better: Goliath or Knight Rider.
Posted by: The Comish (sic) at April 26, 2006 12:57 PM (oCJ1y)
At the zoo, I think.
Posted by: The Comish (sic) at April 26, 2006 01:00 PM (oCJ1y)
Posted by: kevlarchick at April 26, 2006 01:20 PM (bWRxm)
Posted by: Stuart E. at April 26, 2006 01:27 PM (nCeBA)
Posted by: Mike S. at April 26, 2006 01:58 PM (FnVST)
Posted by: The Unabrewer at April 26, 2006 03:55 PM (CDwI3)
Shit, that's no contest: Knight Rider...or actually, to be truthful...KITT.
Hit 13 against a 6
Or worse, roll a 1d6 against 13HP.
Posted by: cheshirecat at April 26, 2006 07:48 PM (ft3Dz)
But my GF calls her own boobs 'the twins' I tend to call them 'the girls'.
I only am guilty of, like, 3 things on the list, does that make me mature or something? Oy!
Posted by: 5cats at April 27, 2006 07:25 AM (cVijR)
I Am Not Ashamed.
Posted by: Barry at April 27, 2006 12:46 PM (kKjaJ)
Posted by: Steve O at April 27, 2006 04:43 PM (R0Csm)
Or a four or five. Actually, depending on how many decks are being used, a five is sometimes a slightly more likely "bust card" for the dealer than a six.
As for the rest of the list... let me get this straight: Air-drumming is out, but air-guitar is still OK? Yesss!!!
Posted by: Joshua at April 28, 2006 03:57 AM (2c7xL)
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