May 31, 2012

Bizarro Issues Statement on Solyndra
— Ace

Double Post! Darnit, Laura beat me.

Anyway, let the double post stand.

Solyndra is racist, or something. It's a racist dog-whistle which subtly reminds racist voters of the age-old prejudice that minorities get get enough of cylinder-shaped thin-film solar panels.

Will no one call the GOP out for playing upon racist tropes like this?

"Then there's the president's policy to become a venture capitalist," Romney said Wednesday night at a campaign stop in Silicon Valley, according to the San Francisco Chronicle. "That's a tough job. We've got a few venture capitalists in the audience tonight, I know. He's decided he can do it better than you guys can."

...

"Have you seen the Solyndra corporation headquarters? You probably have,” Romney asked. “That’s what happens when government puts in hundreds of millions of dollars into an enterprise. And by the way, the president doesn’t understand when you invest like that in one solar energy company, it makes it harder for solar technology generally because the scores of other entrepreneurs in the solar field suddenly lost their opportunity to get capital. Who wants to put money into a solar company when the government puts half a billion into one of its choice? So instead of encouraging solar energy, he discouraged it.”

"The president doesn't understand"? How dare you.

All that's missing from these quotes is a noose.

Comment From Bizarro: Me approve. Me plan to subsidize California plant building Giant Robots made of Kryptonite. We cannot lose Giant Kryptonite Robot race to China.

Me plan to give billionaire crony Lex Luthor $500 million to invest. If we no give Lex Luthor money, where he get money to invest?

If Giant Kryptonite Robots are success, Lex Luthor makes moneys.

If Giant Kryptonite Robots fail, we pick up cost.

This American way.

Who you trust, if you no trust Lex Luthor?

No thank you for your support,

Bizarro

Posted by: Ace at 09:05 AM | Comments (71)
Post contains 324 words, total size 2 kb.

1 That's OK. This is worthy of the ol' double post.

Posted by: DarrenODaly at May 31, 2012 09:07 AM (wDAwT)

2 Good for Romney for pointing this out. I guess unlike other people running for president, he did learn something at Harvard.

Posted by: joeindc44 at May 31, 2012 09:08 AM (S9InG)

3 Ace double post. Double post better than single post!

Posted by: Bizarro joncelli at May 31, 2012 09:10 AM (RD7QR)

4 I guess unlike other people running for president, he did learn something at Harvard.

Given Harvard's track record, I'd be willing to guess that Romney learned this before or after Harvard, not at Harvard.

Posted by: Meiczyslaw at May 31, 2012 09:11 AM (bjRNS)

5 Yeah, that Obama, he's solar, if you know what I mean.  Wink wink.

Solar as the day is long. 

A real photovoltaic motherfucker. 

Posted by: Phinn at May 31, 2012 09:11 AM (KNtHw)

6 Out in the street a crowd is gatherin’,
Pushed down by the heat of the building, they’re wantin’ to dance.
Makin’ their way up the street, a boy with a pig and a radio;
Little billy can work on the crowd, put ’em into a trance,
For the little pig vanz.

Vanz can’t dance, but he’ll steal your money,
Watch him or he’ll rob you blind.

Posted by: Islamic Rage Boy at May 31, 2012 09:12 AM (e8kgV)

7 Dude wants it.

I love it.

Posted by: RarestRX at May 31, 2012 09:12 AM (9ct4e)

8 I'm sold on Bizarro President. Couldn't be worse than O.

Posted by: JDTAY at May 31, 2012 09:12 AM (sFP59)

9

bizarrO still killin' it!

"No thank you for your support." Bwaaa!

Posted by: SnowSun at May 31, 2012 09:13 AM (UAUr6)

10 Wow. What a nice analogy to how the two campaigns have been so far. Team Obama and Team Mitt both planned secret campaigns to one-up the other, Obama in Boston and Mitt in front of Solyndra. Was Mitt allowed to speak? Any Obama supporters interrupt him? No? Point for Team Mitt. I mentioned last night about today being the day Team Obama would try and attack Mitt on his record. Today was supposed to be their day. They can't afford any more of these fuck-ups, but time and again Team Obama gets outplayed. The moment keeps slipping away from them.

Posted by: Joffen, fucking sunshine patriot at May 31, 2012 09:14 AM (U08Mg)

11 Damn it Ace, I want Bizarro 5 President gear and I want it NOW!

Posted by: Mallamutt, RINO President for Life at May 31, 2012 09:14 AM (OWjjx)

12 Money spent on developing Giant Kryptonite Robots will have a ripple effect in the Robot Industry, ultimately leading to the development of reliable, affordable sex robots.

Posted by: Cicero at May 31, 2012 09:15 AM (QKKT0)

13 "Bizarro 5 President" has the potential to be a VERY durable AoSHQ meme for the next couple of months, Ace.

The best ones are the ones that you happen upon by accident.  I loved reading your Twitter feed last night in real time as you stumbled upon the conceit and began to run with it.

Posted by: Jeff B. at May 31, 2012 09:16 AM (KVOrU)

14 12 Money spent on developing Giant Kryptonite Robots will have a ripple effect in the Robot Industry, ultimately leading to the development of reliable, affordable sex robots.

Posted by: Cicero at May 31, 2012 02:15 PM (QKKT0)


Don't want that. Prefer cold showers.

Posted by: Bizarro joncelli at May 31, 2012 09:16 AM (RD7QR)

15 Romney is holding this presser on private property!  He should be arrested!!!!!!  Put the cuffs on and frogmarch him out of there!!!!!

Posted by: Marv Cloggenstein at May 31, 2012 09:17 AM (WGmy2)

16 I like this

Posted by: Yip in Texas at May 31, 2012 09:17 AM (Mrdk1)

17

So pissed I didn't actually start Happy Fun.  So.  Pissed.

 

 

Money spent on developing Giant Kryptonite Robots will have a ripple effect in the Robot Industry, ultimately leading to the development of reliable, affordable sex robots

 

But I don't want to be Japanese!

Posted by: alexthechick at May 31, 2012 09:17 AM (VtjlW)

18 Terr me moll about Giant Kryptonite Robot.

Posted by: Kim Jong Un at May 31, 2012 09:17 AM (QKKT0)

19 Giant kryptonite robots? Good show, old sport. A smashing idea! Cheerio!

Posted by: The Bizarro Joker at May 31, 2012 09:18 AM (UMwMT)

20
Posted by: Joffen, fucking sunshine patriot at May 31, 2012 02:14 PM (U08Mg)






The inevitable MFM response to Mitt's crew busing them in to the Solyndra site without telling 'em will be "they jammed our phones! we couldn't call out! Mormon buses have cancer-causing cellphone jammer technology!"

Posted by: IllTemperedCur at May 31, 2012 09:18 AM (xDqit)

21 LauraW gave us a purty pitcher

Posted by: fluffy at May 31, 2012 09:18 AM (z9HTb)

22 pretty sure the property is now "government owned", if you know what I mean.

Posted by: Chris at May 31, 2012 09:18 AM (ULA0k)

23 China allows abortion for sex selection, even subsidizes it! Are we going to let China beat us in the abortion for sex selection field?

It's our job to support organizations like Planned Parenthood, who otherwise would be defeated by China!!

Posted by: President Barry at May 31, 2012 09:19 AM (DQHjw)

24 minorities get get enough

Taking double posting to the next level.

Posted by: MikeTheMoose Troll Hunter! at May 31, 2012 09:20 AM (0q2P7)

25 Another Obama surrogate fucks up the messaging. http://tinyurl.com/dytbyjc Wow. Just...wow. They just can't catch a break, huh?

Posted by: Joffen, fucking sunshine patriot at May 31, 2012 09:20 AM (U08Mg)

26 Gee- the liberal nuts on MSNBC ( always MSNBC ) are saying the "right to choose" also includes the right to choose what sex? Gee I'm no constitutional scholar but I don't remember that even being brought up back then?

Posted by: Nevergiveup at May 31, 2012 09:21 AM (05RcU)

27 Elizabeth Warren, come on in!

Hey Liz, I have a great joke for you, a joke that will make you laugh your tits off.

Oh, I see you have already heard it.

Posted by: dr kill at May 31, 2012 09:22 AM (ufLRj)

28 Next up:  Mitt standing next to a burned Volt.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at May 31, 2012 09:22 AM (UOM48)

29

"Some  of  these  people  tweet  me!  I  know  them!  You  people  can't  handle  the  truth!"    Gawd,  I  sound  pathetic  and look  fat.

Posted by: Axelrod Looking Like An Ass In Mass. at May 31, 2012 09:22 AM (c3mby)

30

@23 - so THIS was why you all finally decided to  let me in?

Posted by: The Barefoot Lawyer at May 31, 2012 09:23 AM (q/kmn)

31 >>Any Obama supporters interrupt him? No?

They'll tweet about when they roll out of bed and their mommy makes their breakfast.

Posted by: HeatherRadish at May 31, 2012 09:24 AM (/kI1Q)

32 Pelosi: ObamaCare Will Be Upheld 6-3, "Because I Know The Constitution When asked why she is so confident the Supreme Court will uphold the health care law, Pelosi says, "Because I know the Constitution." "This bill is ironclad," she continued. "It is ironclad. Nobody was frivolous with the Constitution and the health of the American people in writing the bill,” she said. “So, that’s where my confidence springs from, the merit of the bill and the nature of the Constitution. The makeup of the court, well, we’ll see." Yes we will see!

Posted by: Nevergiveup at May 31, 2012 09:24 AM (05RcU)

33

Yeah, nice "SQUIRREL!" moment with the Giant Kryptonite Robots, luddite.

 

Flying.  Cars.  Now.

Posted by: Circa (Insert Year Here) at May 31, 2012 09:24 AM (B+qrE)

34

Gee- the liberal nuts on MSNBC ( always MSNBC ) are saying the "right to choose" also includes the right to choose what sex?

 

If you believe that it is the woman's right to choose, then the rationale for that choice is irrelevant.  If it weren't about something so serious, I would kick back, get my popcorn and watch the hilarious clash of the sacrament of abortion vs. the reality that it's mostly girls who get aborted. 


It must be so nice to not worry about whether your position is self-refuting or, hell, coherent for that matter. 

Posted by: alexthechick at May 31, 2012 09:24 AM (VtjlW)

35 Breaking:  Edwards jury has reached a verdict

Posted by: mama winger at May 31, 2012 09:24 AM (P6QsQ)

36 Verdict in Edwards case

Posted by: Nevergiveup at May 31, 2012 09:24 AM (05RcU)

37 They can't afford any more of these fuck-ups, but time and again Team Obama gets outplayed.

Hey, get out of here, you f***er.

Posted by: Axelrod's OODA Loop at May 31, 2012 09:25 AM (84pE9)

38 11 Damn it Ace, I want Bizarro 5 President gear and I want it NOW!
Posted by: Mallamutt, RINO President for Life at May 31, 2012 02:14 PM (OWjjx)


You're doing it wrong: you want it THEN!

Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars at May 31, 2012 09:25 AM (Wqfrr)

39

Pelosi: ObamaCare Will Be Upheld 6-3, "Because I Know The Constitution

 

San Fran Botox Nan also predicted in October of 2010 she would still be Speaker in 2011. 

 

How do I get her into my NCAA Basketball pool.....cause I could use the free money.

Posted by: Mallamutt, RINO President for Life at May 31, 2012 09:25 AM (OWjjx)

40 @28 - Then, later, Mitt Romney giving a speech at one of those ARRA-funded  turtle tunnels.

Posted by: reason at May 31, 2012 09:26 AM (q/kmn)

41 When asked why she is so confident the Supreme Court will uphold the health care law, Pelosi says, "Because I know the Constitution."


Yes, she does. She wipes her ass with it every day.

Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars at May 31, 2012 09:26 AM (Wqfrr)

42
Pelosi thinks she's cute. If it's upheld, she'll say it was because it was Constitutional. If it is struck down, Pelosi will blame it on the partisan Justices.


Posted by: Soothsayer at May 31, 2012 09:26 AM (9Q7Nu)

43 I am gratified to see that Romney is not afraid to swing for the bitch wrinkle.

Posted by: Empire of Jeff at May 31, 2012 09:26 AM (+DMSZ)

44 Me vow to read my own blog.

Posted by: Bizzaro 6 at May 31, 2012 09:26 AM (vbh31)

45

Verdict in Edwards case

 

The jury has decided that his hair is dreamy.

Posted by: Mallamutt, RINO President for Life at May 31, 2012 09:27 AM (OWjjx)

46

At the risk of sounding critical, I'm sick of the "Obama doesn't understand" meme. Such commentary implicitly suggests that this president has certain normal, basic goals and principles.

 

The fact is, he's a socialist, and a politician. If he doesn't "understand", it's because he considers it irrelevant. He does it to try to seize control of the life blood of industry, and to buy campaign contributions with your money. He couldn't care less about real effects on business and the economy.

 

That being said, sometimes it really does seem like he actually buys some of the lefty religious doctrine - that he actually expects the solar industry to have some miraculous moment, and start producing vast quantities of both energy and jobs. Is it "ignorance" (it hardly seems possible!), denial of reality, or just more BS and lies? Who knows? Who CARES? It all comes out the same.

Posted by: Optimizer at May 31, 2012 09:27 AM (As94z)

47
Because the only reasons why anyone would disagree with a Democrats is racism, partisanship, or both.


Posted by: Soothsayer at May 31, 2012 09:27 AM (9Q7Nu)

48 29
"Some of these people tweet me! I know them! You people can't handle the truth!" Gawd, I sound pathetic and look fat.

 

Posted by: Axelrod Looking Like An Ass In Mass. at May 31, 2012 02:22 PM (c3mby)

 

---------------

 

Heh. ...Axelrod  was screeching like a wet cat today.

 

I hope that there will be some good videos made of it. ....Including him having to walk through the protestors.

Posted by: wheatie at May 31, 2012 09:27 AM (YzQ1g)

49

"Verdict in Edwards case"

 

We find the defendent, Johnathan Danger Edwards, to be SEXY in the first degree!

Posted by: Flirty Female Foreman (Foremanette? Forwoman?) at May 31, 2012 09:28 AM (q/kmn)

50

"This bill is ironclad,"

You know what else was ironclad?

the Re d'Italia

Now at the bottom of the Adriatic.

GO PE-LOUSY!!!

Posted by: imp at May 31, 2012 09:28 AM (UaxA0)

51 35 Breaking: Edwards jury has reached a verdict

Posted by: mama winger at May 31, 2012 02:24 PM (P6QsQ)


The verdict: Fabulous!

Posted by: John Edwards at May 31, 2012 09:28 AM (RD7QR)

52

Where's my driver's license?

Oh shit, that reminds me I've got to get mine renewed by tomorrow.

Posted by: jwest at May 31, 2012 09:28 AM (ZDsRL)

53

 

 

But according to Barry, he lives in the real world, not like that bully Romney who is mean, a world which is really the bizarro world, not the real world...

 

So Barry's experiences all these years of his jugeared life are in the real world, which is really the bizarro world, but to us out here in the real world, it's hte bizarro world.

 

 

Posted by: Rev. Dr. E. Buzz. Bunnies. at May 31, 2012 09:29 AM (tcSZb)

54

Pelosi knows the Constitution.

 

Barry  has a fucking honorary doctorate in Judaism.

 

Are we sure we aren't already  on Bizarro  Urf?

Posted by: reason at May 31, 2012 09:30 AM (q/kmn)

55 Oh shit, that reminds me I've got to get mine renewed by tomorrow.

Happy birthday.  I still have a week to renew.

Posted by: CUS at May 31, 2012 09:30 AM (84pE9)

56

Nobody was frivolous with the Constitution and the health of the American people in writing the bill

 

Except for the parts where no one knew what was in it or how much it would cost.

Posted by: Circa (Insert Year Here) at May 31, 2012 09:30 AM (B+qrE)

57

"The makeup of the court, well, we’ll see."

 

Bitch, you  are NOT one to talk to me about make-up.

Posted by: Elena Kagan at May 31, 2012 09:31 AM (q/kmn)

58 JOHN EDWARDS JURY REACHES VERDICT

Posted by: The Jackhole at May 31, 2012 09:32 AM (nTgAI)

59

I like how Romney didn't attack the absurdity of solar energy - rather he is attacking the *unfairness* of picking winners, or cronyism, one of Obama's lines of attack on him.

 

Or, at least, it *was*.  Well done.

Posted by: Empire of Jeff at May 31, 2012 09:32 AM (+DMSZ)

60 Has the John Edwards Jury reached a verdict yet?

Posted by: Donald J Trump at May 31, 2012 09:35 AM (jucos)

61

 

 

Barry the Wonder Boy thinks he's that black Preeezy on 24, I'm sure of it...

 

 

Posted by: Rev. Dr. E. Buzz. Bunnies. at May 31, 2012 09:35 AM (tcSZb)

62

Any indication if the Edwards jury has reached two verdicts.  One for each America?

 

Although he remains a rat bastard in both.

Posted by: Circa (Insert Year Here) at May 31, 2012 09:36 AM (B+qrE)

63 Silky Pony Redux (from Fox News):

The President has been using the same Chicago based barber, who goes by the name Zariff, for the past 17 years.   According to German Public Radio, the President flies Zariff from Chicago to DC for a trim every two weeks.  The president allegedly personally funds these trips. President Obama obviously also does not care much about the massive carbon footprint his haircuts are leaving on our planet which, we are told, is tipping precariously.

Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars at May 31, 2012 09:38 AM (Wqfrr)

64 At the risk of sounding critical, I'm sick of the "Obama doesn't understand" meme. Posted by: Optimizer at May 31, 2012 02:27 PM (As94z) No risk involved. But at least we can all agree that *Jay Carney* doesn't understand!

Posted by: Merovign, Dark Lord of the Sith at May 31, 2012 09:46 AM (bxiXv)

65 Obama is a stuttering clusterf*ck of a miserable failure.

Posted by: steevy at May 31, 2012 09:50 AM (Xb3hu)

66 The huge photo of Romney in front of Solyndra in Laura's post is what threw you, ace. ;-)

Posted by: Y-not at May 31, 2012 09:51 AM (5H6zj)

67 60
I like how Romney didn't attack the absurdity of solar energy - rather he is attacking the *unfairness* of picking winners, or cronyism, one of Obama's lines of attack on him.

Or, at least, it *was*. Well done.

Posted by: Empire of Jeff at May 31, 2012 02:32 PM (+DMSZ)


Kind of nice seeing "our" candidate actually wanting to have the job.

Posted by: MrCaniac at May 31, 2012 09:59 AM (1grxW)

68 I like. First Axelrod getting rolled in MA, now this. Attach, Attack, Attack. Must get popcorn.

Posted by: thunderb at May 31, 2012 10:26 AM (Dnbau)

69 Solomon Grundy opposes Bizarro's plan for giant kryptonite robot funding. Bizarro hopes to fool America and Solomon Grundy with his giant robot plan when robots will not even kill Superman. Solomon Grundy thinks money will be spent on robots that whistle Disney tunes. Bizarro cannot fool Solomon Grundy. Solomon Grundy was not born yesterday because yesterday was not Monday, and Solomon Grundy is pretty sure he was born on a Monday.

Posted by: Solomon Grundy at May 31, 2012 10:28 AM (mt3j2)

70 This is easy for me to say.

Posted by: Bow Tying White Boy at May 31, 2012 03:52 PM (nC797)

71 This am genius, Ace. Awesome work!

Posted by: Genetic Tunder at May 31, 2012 05:12 PM (3yCFy)

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