November 30, 2006

Author Claims Baby-Talk Is A Universal Proto-Language Which Can Be Understood
— Ace

The baby-talk "code." She claims the language is reflexive. "Neh," for example, mimics the sound a baby makes when he's feeding, so "neh" means "I'm hungry."

After a nurse told her not to worry about her baby’s constant colicky crying, Priscilla Dunstan, now 32, decided that there must be a better answer. As a professional musician in Australia with a “photographic” memory for sound, she began to keep notes on her newborn son’s wails, and, sure enough, detected a pattern — five specific sounds that he would make when he was hungry, tired, needed to burp, was uncomfortable, or had gas.

“These words are created when sound is added to a baby’s natural reflexes,” explains Dunstan, whose research on over 1,000 babies has led her to believe that these words are universal among infants during the first three months of life. “This system is about helping the mother to believe in her own intuition,” she says.


Here are two words to get you started.

“I’m hungry!”

The word: Neh

Where it comes from: The noise made when a baby pushes his tongue to the roof of his mouth because he wants to eat, “neh,” is an infant’s sucking reflex with sound added to it.

“I need to burp!”

The word: Eh

Where it comes from: When a big bubble of air is caught in your baby’s chest, the sound you hear is “eh,” as your baby tries to get the burp out.

I suppose it's possible. Her explanation is plausible enough. Not that that makes it true.

But What Does "Heh" Mean? Ghengis (or as I call him, Jenjis) writes to say he thinks he knows.

"Heh" is baby-talk for "I needs me some of those puppies."

Posted by: Ace at 01:56 PM | Comments (60)
Post contains 310 words, total size 2 kb.

1 It makes sense, there are other words that we can all relate to, like.

"So? You found out that my infant is more articulate than lindsay lohan, and you have a 6 figure salary a federal grant and got published?"

thus the word


"So let me get this right, you call yourself a scientist?"

Thus the word


"I agree whole heartedly with everything you say, you are the authority in all things and now lets talk about global warming"

Thus the phrase

"Chimpy Bushhitler Haliburton IRAQ! IMPEACH!"

It's all very clear.

Posted by: Wickedpinto at November 30, 2006 02:02 PM (QTv8u)

2 "Grease" is the word that I heard. Although it might've been Bob Neh talking.

Posted by: km at November 30, 2006 02:08 PM (SxR3N)

3 Possible.

Many bird songs are pure instinct and known from birth.

Posted by: Pablo Honey at November 30, 2006 02:09 PM (CkFXK)

4 What's the word for, "My mommy doesn't wear underwear?"

Posted by: Editor at November 30, 2006 02:10 PM (adpJH)

5 a “photographic” memory for sound,

okay, set this cat on fire, thats just a retarded statement. Maybe she should have her infant do the talking from now on.

Posted by: Wickedpinto at November 30, 2006 02:10 PM (QTv8u)

6 I have an audiophonic vision for the tactile quality of peace and time. . . . .Moonbeams. . . ..



Posted by: Wickedpinto at November 30, 2006 02:14 PM (QTv8u)

7 Scam. Wish I had thought of it, as any idiotic baby guru is instantly taken seriously.

Posted by: Stormy70 at November 30, 2006 02:18 PM (7WJsV)

8 Additional evidence of infant communication can be found HERE.

Posted by: Rosetta at November 30, 2006 02:26 PM (QmI9R)

9 She probably got the idea from the Simpsons' episode where Homer's brother Herb invents a baby-talk-to-English translator.

Posted by: wtf at November 30, 2006 02:26 PM (t3Mks)

10 that'll teach WP to eat mushrooms he found on a pile of dog poop.

Posted by: hobgoblin at November 30, 2006 02:40 PM (p1s9n)

11 I know when Baby Warden is hungry because he makes an "ah!" sound. He's very consistent about it and it doesn't sound anything like the universal "eh" sound that this author describes.

Which either makes him a supergenius or complete retard.

Based on who his father is I'm going with retard.

Posted by: Warden at November 30, 2006 02:40 PM (9e+67)

12 Warden, it's just that you don't have a photographic memory for music and sound...


Posted by: Wickedpinto at November 30, 2006 02:48 PM (QTv8u)

13 Lazer Soccer Derby!

Posted by: Wickedpinto at November 30, 2006 02:54 PM (QTv8u)

14 Neh-eh, gurgle gloop kuh!


Pu-pah, blup koo!

Posted by: Baby Frank at November 30, 2006 02:55 PM (KeOQp)

15 Neh-eh, plu-bubu GLUB GLUB, BLEY-EH-POO!

Posted by: Baby Spurwing at November 30, 2006 02:57 PM (KeOQp)

16 Prrrrrrrrrroooooooooooooottttttt.

Posted by: km at November 30, 2006 02:57 PM (SxR3N)

17 When the little bastards cry it means they want to cop a hit from your crack pipe. Little shits really go for the rock once they get a taste.

Posted by: Marion Barry at November 30, 2006 03:21 PM (p9O/F)

18 more examples of baby talk can found here.
Quite often, in fact.

Posted by: wiserbud at November 30, 2006 03:40 PM (2+/7m)

19 Baby Slub makes a sound similar to the "eh" or the "neh" when she's hungry.

I never believed parents when they said babies have different cries for different needs before, but it's pretty apparent now.

Of course, she's starting to imitate my noises, which is no good at all.  The other day, I was working on something, hit my thumb and said "shit."  She looked up at me, smiled and started going "shhh...shhh"

I'm sure she'll wait until we're at church to finish saying the word.

Posted by: Slublog at November 30, 2006 03:54 PM (fDMNP)

20 You're all fucking retards. My dad will kick your ass.

Posted by: baby Warden at November 30, 2006 04:00 PM (X98gI)

21 Ace,

Does Glenn know this is sort of a Helen stalking site?


Also, there is a thing called "pacing" where you could post something new every few hours.

You're gone for a day and a half and now you're posting like you're all hopped up on meth.

NTTAWWT either.

Posted by: Rosetta at November 30, 2006 04:10 PM (CTqCo)

22 Babies experience pain when they are hungry. What you are hearing are initial sounds of discomfort.

Posted by: at November 30, 2006 04:10 PM (fVE3j)

23 Shameless, leave Dr. Helen alone, instanpundit will not bite on this obvious trap, but I hope he does for your traffic.  Dr. Helen dat be HOT, wuff

Posted by: kempermanx at November 30, 2006 04:41 PM (Wc54u)

24 The Simpson's already did this.

Posted by: Professor Chaos at November 30, 2006 04:46 PM (TKlZx)

25 Getting the posting back on track from the Dr. Helen Fetish tangent, I make some similar sounds when I hungry, tired, need to burp, am uncomfortable, or have gas.

(Which is often all at the same time)

However, my family is not impressed.

So I'm thinking about looking up this Priscilla Dunstan chick, she sounds easily impressed.

And probably a complete moonbat, but can't be choosy.

Posted by: Carl in N.H. at November 30, 2006 04:47 PM (CliQ3)

26 Show some respect, people. Dr. Helen is not only a forensic psychologist, but I hear her name is also the most frequent answer given on Tennessee death row to the question - "So waddiyawant for your last meal?"


Posted by: mmphhhbllmmblmsluurp at November 30, 2006 04:49 PM (l5goZ)

27 I just saw an advert for The Economist magazine on AoS. What retard algorithm decided that this is a proper place to advertize this magazine?

Posted by: Tushar D at November 30, 2006 05:11 PM (9ULFg)

28 Yeah, we were regaled with this exciting breakthrough in neonatal/pediatric care today in a mandatory 2 hour conference as part of our continuing education. I was given the long-eye when I suggested that this is not particularly new, nor exciting.

Anyone with a dog, cat, horse, or kid knows that there are different cries employed for different unmet needs. A cry of anger sounds different from a cry of pain or despair.

The Director gave me a frosty look, but Fuck her. Some of the stuff we have to hear drives me nuts. Pacific Institute, healing touch, cultural sensitivity, ect...

Nice pic, btw.

Posted by: at November 30, 2006 05:49 PM (QTvV8)

29 That was me. I keep forgetting I have to sign my name everytime. New comments thingy still has me barred.

Posted by: drolmorg at November 30, 2006 05:52 PM (QTvV8)

30 And blerrrrrrp means "Okay, that shirt is going to have to go to the dry-cleaners."

(Three-month-old nephew with a bit of a reflux problem.)

Posted by: Pixy Misa at November 30, 2006 05:52 PM (FRalS)


Posted by: spurwing plover at November 30, 2006 05:54 PM (TPwuq)

32 Hee hee, good one, Spurwing.

Posted by: Nice Deb at November 30, 2006 05:57 PM (j/w7v)

33 Who's the babe?

Posted by: Scot at November 30, 2006 07:49 PM (A6XnN)

34 The hot chick in the orange shirt i mean.

Posted by: Scot at November 30, 2006 07:51 PM (A6XnN)

35 Instapundit's wife.

Posted by: Slublog at November 30, 2006 07:54 PM (S0rTH)

36 What's the word for, "My mommy doesn't wear underwear?"
Posted by Editor at November 30, 2006 07:10 PM
I think that would be "[Thump] Get that would you, Deirdre..."

From Monty Python's Meaning of Life, of course...

Posted by: cthulhu at November 30, 2006 08:29 PM (qectw)

37 This post brought up a few important issues:

1.) The instapundit married a hot woman with a sexy accent. I am not trying to be crude, it's true.

2.) Warden isn't giving it 110% as a father:

"You're all fucking retards. My dad will kick your ass."

Warden, if you want a lefthanded quaterback you tie the kids right hand behind his back. If you want a fighter his jaw should either be filled with wood chips, chew them like gum, or so sore from punching he can't talk. An Iron Jaw is given by the father, earned and worth it in the long run.

Posted by: mike at November 30, 2006 10:09 PM (CDn52)

38 I was told that just regular gum (in large quantities) or sucking a lot of cock took care of that mike.

Thankfully I wasn't a boxer, just a wrestler. . . .

Hrm, maybe I should stop with the homo-erotic jokes for a while?

Posted by: Wickedpinto at December 01, 2006 12:13 AM (QTv8u)

39 I forget when it was, last year maybe, insty linked a pick of her, it might have been this one, and I commented at her site, and knowing that she's a forensic psychologist, I commented something like "I'm so gonna commit a a crazy murder in tennessee and demand you interview me" or some shit like that.

Posted by: Wickedpinto at December 01, 2006 12:15 AM (QTv8u)


Five actually.

#4 You gobbled too many of those black beauty scooby snacks, thought the baby was demon and put the kid in the oven.

#5 Your crack head rapist boyfriend spent some time alone with the kid while you went out to score a bag of dope, raped the crap out of it, then used it as an expedient sponge to texture paint the walls while you were gone.

Both of these will make a baby cry.

Posted by: Purple Avenger at December 01, 2006 12:17 AM (p9O/F)

41 I feel guilty talking about other people's wives, but I find it hilarious, so I'm gonna share a quick story.

My big brother, who is really my father figure all the time that I grew up, and while his wife if cool, with a guy like sense of humor and fucking beautiful, I can't ever think of either of them in a sexual way, thats just how it is.

Anyways, one day I'm at my brothers place, I think it was his birthday actually (which would make this even more funny) my brother, myself and his best friend in the region are all sitting in line making sarcastic jokes about everyone else in the house.

Well, it gets kinda late, and sissy, my nickname for my brothers wife, wants to play some music so she starts blasting "right thurr" or is it "right therr" (I love the fact that I'm asking this, whats the "correct" spelling for that song title?) and shit.

Well, she would walk passed us, and my brothers friend would go "right THERRR!" and stare at my sissy's ass, and my brother would do it too.

This went on for a while even after the song changed, and then sissy goes into the kitchen to get us a snack plate so that we would keep eating as well as drinking.

As soon as she walked out of the garage and was out of earshot my brothers friend turned to him and said "(wickedpinto brothers name) I love you dude, but really, I can't wait for you to die so I can fuck your wife"

I really couldn't stop laughing all night.

Posted by: Wickedpinto at December 01, 2006 12:28 AM (QTv8u)

42 "Can't wait for you to die?" That's funny?

That's not funny. Stabbing him first and then telling him' "I can't wait until you die so I can fuck your wife!" while unbuttoning your Levis, that's funny.

Posted by: spongeworthy at December 01, 2006 05:29 AM (uSomN)


Posted by: spurwing plover at December 02, 2006 11:57 AM (JtcRt)

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