February 29, 2008

The Hillary* Red Phone Ringing at 3am Ad
— Dave in Texas

It just seems lame. Is it because I can't take her seriously?

I'm too young to recall the Johnson ad (shut up), which I've heard ran just one time, but hey, in 64 you could cover the nation in 3 networks. Was it more powerful?

I think Mondale ran one like this against Gary Hart too, before he imploded. I was busy that year.

The Johnson ad, which most of us have seen: more...

Posted by: Dave in Texas at 06:38 PM | Comments (75)
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Friday Night Japanese Robot Porn, Flamewar or Open Thread
— Dave in Texas

I'm not really linking any Japanese robot porn, although I'm sure there's some out there.

I'm. Sure.

Some of you are buried in Winter. Others of you are blessed like me (until July). I sense a disturbance in the Force, as if dozens stubbed their toes and cried out as one.

Pussies. Suck it up. Do the pain dance.

Topically, Clinton, Obamarama, close in Texas!

I'll do my part.

Ok, I won't. I'll be out of town on Tuesday. But I'm calling people tonight, yes sir.

Good news! Amy crackhouse Winehouse cleared of witness tampering charges!

That new clothing line will sell like hotcakes!!

(I never understood that analogy and you're all booger-eaters)

UPDATE: ok, ok.

you people are so needy more...

Posted by: Dave in Texas at 03:39 PM | Comments (104)
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Friday Night Awesome
— Ace

The best damn thing I've seen all month.

Via Stop the ACLU.

Posted by: Ace at 03:37 PM | Comments (40)
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Eric Thomas Bradley: Chris Klien-ian Douchetool or Just Fucking Awesome?
— Jack M.

I report. You decide.

Comment of the Day #1, from the aforementioned Eric Thomas Bradley in my thread about the Paulbot attacking Hillary Clinton.

It makes me laugh that some of you people are so ordinary in your outlook that you think "holding a steady job" is some kind of virtue. Being told what to do your entire life is the definition of slavery. I've hardly ever worked, have accumulated a good deal of wealth, lived in eight countries and visited 76, and have never inherited one cent from anyone. It is only the un-courageous who hide behind their jobs to have some sort of identity. I feel sorry for all the people who have no idead how to live.

Eric Thomas Bradley

Comment of the Day #2, posed as a follow-up in that thread by Toby928.

I find your lifestory intriguing and would like to subscribe to your newsletter

Hmm. Have I been misguided in thinking that there is something admirable about holding a steady job? Is this the protestant work ethic blinding me to the joys of leading the life of a wandering minstrel? Is Toby928 correct in wanting to know more about how he too can also experience the blessed freedoms provided by this exemplar of a devil-may-care life of international experience galore that lesser mortals dare but to dream of acheiving? Or is Toby928 more correct in his assertion, via snark, that Eric Thomas Bradley just might be an insufferable douche?

I might have to flip a coin. What do y'all think?

Oh yeah. And who the hell is Eric Thomas Bradley, anyway?

Posted by: Jack M. at 01:51 PM | Comments (72)
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AP Goons Force SnappedShot.com To Shut Down
— Ace

Objecting to SS's use of their photos.

Not sure what we can do about this.

Posted by: Ace at 12:15 PM | Comments (56)
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Soldier Wins $1 Million In Lottery, So of Course He's... Heading Right Back To Iraq For His Third Tour
— Ace

Tony Stark? Fuck you.

After completing two tours in Iraq, Sgt. Wayne Leyde won $1 million from a scratch-and-win lotto ticket on Tuesday.

Now that he's won, Leyde, a 26-year-old member of the Washington National Guard, says he's still going to volunteer to go back to Iraq for a third tour and won't spend any of the money in the meantime.


Leyde couldn't believe it when he scratched a winning ticket, but he still plans to return to Iraq.

"It was a commitment I made about three months ago. I'm going to stick to it," Leyde said about his decision.

Now that's a motivated individual.

Not really related, except that it's swiped from Drudge -- here's that area-denial pain ray in action against the real enemy, a 60 Minutes reporter.

Posted by: Ace at 11:50 AM | Comments (31)
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For Dorks Only
— Ace

Everyone else please skip this post and pretend you never saw it. Seriously. There are some things you don't need to know. more...

Posted by: Ace at 11:07 AM | Comments (61)
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Whoah: Zawahiri Targeted?
— Ace

Just buzz and speculation, but pretty sweet. Someone got croaked. Just maybe not the Big Z.

Pakistani and US intelligence are attempting to sort out the names of the al Qaeda and Taliban operatives killed in yesterday's airstrike in Azam Warzak, South Waziristan. Initial reports indicated Arabs and fighters from Central Asia were killed in the operation. One report indicates an "al Qaeda fugitive from Egypt" was among those killed, sparking rumors that Ayman al Zawahiri was the target of the strike.


While the identities of those killed in the latest strike in South Waziristan are still being sorted out, the nationality of some of those killed is known. Anywhere from eight to 13 al Qaeda and Taliban were reported killed in the strike. Dawn reported four Arabs, two Turkmen, and two Pakistanis from Punjab province were killed. Local Taliban cordoned the area and immediately buried the bodies, which were said to have been badly burned and mutilated.

The presence of Arab al Qaeda operatives in Azam Warzak has led to speculation that a senior al Qaeda figure may have been killed. "An al Qaeda fugitive from Egypt" was reported to have been among those killed, The Nation reported. This has raised the hopes that Ayman al Zawahiri, the Egyptian-borne second in command of al Qaeda was among present during the strike.

But several senior Egyptian members of al Qaeda are known to operate in Pakistan's tribal areas.

Geraghty notes the political angle:

[A] key part of both Hillary and Obama's playbooks is endlessly moaning, "we've forgotten the real war, we're losing the war in Afghanistan, we've been distracted from al-Qaeda." Democrats looked silly when they claimed the Iraq buildup was distracting from fighting al-Qaeda, just as the U.S. and Pakistan captured Khalid Sheik Mohammed.

Posted by: Ace at 10:31 AM | Comments (27)
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American Traitor Adam Gadahn Dead?
— Ace

There's a lot of buzz that he may have been killed in that airstrike that took out senior AQ members, and Rusty's sources say that's the word -- and his sources are good, but they in turn rely on sources of dubious validity.

Exclusive footage of what could be this nasty fat fuck getting it below. Macabre content warning. more...

Posted by: Ace at 09:24 AM | Comments (31)
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Iron Man
— Slublog

Iron Man Exclusive Trailer

Add to My Profile | More Videos

Saw this last night. Video link courtesy of Allah, who's got good thoughts about the choice of casting Downey.

Bear in mind... [ace]: this is of course an anti-war themed movie. The comic book itself was anti-war. Stark became an alcoholic, didn't he, over his guilt for providing armaments for Vietnam?

But it just may be the most awesomest anti-war movie ever. Certainly it's more awesome than Lions for Lambs.

Posted by: Slublog at 08:04 AM | Comments (73)
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Clinton Plays the "Poor Wittle Woman" Card
— Gabriel Malor

On tonight's Nightline, Clinton will ask for a sympathy vote because she is a woman. (Warning: there are 400+ comments to the linked post and it can take a long time to load.) Of course, she says that she wants no sympathy, but is there any other way to describe this?

Asked why she thinks so many women may be feeling sorry for her, Clinton said, "I think a lot of women project their own feelings and their lives onto me, and they see how hard this is. It's hard. It's hard being a woman out there. It is obviously challenging with some of the things that are said that are not even personal to me so much as they are about women.


"Every so often I just wish that it were a little more of an even playing field," she said, "but, you know, I play on whatever field is out there."

Over on the flip side, we see race-mongers implying that blacks who don't support Obama are standing in the way of a "genuine historical moment." I guess they don't care as much that there are quite a few other shades of human that are also standing in the way of history.

Clinton wishes she could leverage that kind of sentiment from women voters. Voters who are, apparently, dumb enough to believe that the person who was the frontrunner in national polls for the first twelve months of the election season; the person who was the presumptive, "inevitable" nominee; the person who has all the power of a former president's entrenched political machine behind her is somehow suffering because of a systematic bias against women. In other words, she's depending on the vote of people with long term memory damage.

ABC's Jake Tapper drolly adds:

Of course, it might be observed that it likely hasn't exactly been a complete walk in the park for an African-American to run for president, either.

In the identity politics of the Democratic Party, the black card always trumps the woman card.

Posted by: Gabriel Malor at 08:01 AM | Comments (38)
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When Paulbots attack Clintons!
— Jack M.

This is probably the most pathetic and yet most compellingly entertaining political story you will read today.

Meet Robert Morrow, full time Clinton-hater and Ron Paul enthusiast.

Now if I were to say to you "describe a man who spends over 10 hours a day researching Clinton conspiracies and supporting Ron Paul" I bet you would probably list the following:

Perpetually indignant.
43 years old.
Doesn't hold a steady job.
Occasionally day trades stocks.
Lives off an inheritance.

Shockingly, Robert Morrow meets all these criteria and more! Let's learn more about this fascinatingly nuanced man of letters, shall we?

So, Rob, tell me your thoughts about Chelsea Clinton.

"Chelsea is the seed of Web Hubbell and not Bill Clinton. Would I bet my life on it? No. I would bet my pickup truck," he declares between bites of salmon. "Hillary Clinton was sleeping with both of her law partners, Webb Hubbell and Vince Foster. And she's a lesbian, too."

Interesting. I always thought her dad was Janet Reno, but then I haven't read all the books. more...

Posted by: Jack M. at 07:14 AM | Comments (41)
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"Virtual" Fence Follies
— Ace

I think this is pretty obvious, but still worth noting for the record:

In other words, we've all just been taken for a ride .... In order to do whatever possible to avoid building an actual physical fence ... Bush, McCain and their amnesty cronies made sure a monumental amount of money was wasted on a fake, untested, unreal fence to placate conservatives ... .

And now, after the tens of millions of dollars spent on an unworkable, failed system, and a year of the Feds touting the genius of the 'virtual' fence, Amnesty Secretary Michael Chertoff now says the border will not be prot[e]cted by a physical fence or even a virtual fence ...

It's not all bad though -- we'll "double" the fleet of unmanned drones watching the thousand mile border from three all the way up to six!

Of course, we were previously promised four of these drones to cover every inch of territory between the Gulf of Mexico and California, but hey, six is better than four, right?

Posted by: Ace at 07:01 AM | Comments (17)
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Third Party Candidate?
— Ace

Is this the conservative we've all been waiting for?

Posted by: Ace at 06:52 AM | Comments (14)
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100% Pure Ricin Found In Vegas Hotel
— Ace

Preliminary tests indicate it's "100% ricin," but follow-up tests haven't comfirmed that. Castor beans (used to make the poison) were also found.

It seems that something bad was afoot. Though of course it might just be plain old murder or psychopathy... thankfully.

Hot Air has the link.

Police in Las Vegas, Nevada, are investigating the discovery of what they said is the deadly poison ricin in a hotel room.

No one has shown symptoms of ricin poisoning after the toxin was found Thursday at a Las Vegas, Nevada, hotel.

Preliminary tests show the substance is ricin, authorities said, but other tests to confirm it are under way.

Meanwhile, the reason the substance was in the room remains a mystery.

"We don't know who [the ricin] belongs to or why it would be here at this time," said Capt. Joe Lombardo of the Las Vegas Metropolitan Police Department.

The FBI, which is assisting in the case, said it saw no link to terrorism, according to spokesman Richard Kolko.

Authorities were called to an Extended Stay America hotel around 3 p.m. PT Thursday after a man brought a bag with a small container to the manager's office. The man said he found it while retrieving items from a hotel room.

The substance is "100 percent ricin," Lombardo said.

Posted by: Ace at 06:05 AM | Comments (32)
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February 28, 2008

Irony 1, Russ 0 - But the Game's not over yet UPDATED
— Russ from Winterset

UPDATE [Dave in Texas]: Just received a report on the moron hotline,

He's going in!

Honestly, bacon doesn't stand a chance.


We're less than 36 hours until the kickoff of the 2008 First Annual Blue Ribbon Bacon Fest, and Irony has decided to clutch my balls in her cold, dead fingers and squeeze for all she's worth.

I've been fighting a chest cold/undetermined bug for the last ten days or so, and it's mostly gone.....MOSTLY. I've still got a little bit of crud in my chest & sinuses, but the symptom that's really kicking my ass right now is the almost complete loss of taste.


Remember that old Twilight Zone episode where Burgess Meredith played the old librarian? He's the sole survivor of a nuclear war, and now he's got all the time in the world to read all the books....until he sits on his only pair of glasses.

That's about how I feel right now. I've still got about a day & a half to get my taste back, but I'm not optimistic. I'm probably going to go to the Bacon Fest Saturday morning & consume a bunch of STUFF that taste remotely like the Bacon Bits I put on my salad. That's a big leap from the prime Iowa-raised fresh bacon that I was expecting, but when troubles like this come my way, I ask myself "What would Jack Burton do?"

Then I remember what I do when the earth quakes, the poison arrows fall from the sky, and the pillars of Heaven shake. Yeah, Russ from Winterset just looks that big old storm right in the eye and says, "Give me your best shot. I can take it." And then I ask for another plate full of bacon. Because I can. Plus, it's free, which is a big bonus, right?

Posted by: Russ from Winterset at 08:09 PM | Comments (24)
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Black Superdelegates Harassed
— Gabriel Malor

Via Hot Air headlines, the Democratic race war continues. Some Obama supporters are not too keen for black superdelegates who have announced support for Clinton:

“African-American superdelegates are being targeted, harassed and threatened,” said Rep. Emanuel Cleaver II (D-Mo.), a superdelegate who has supported Clinton since August. Cleaver said black superdelegates are receiving “nasty letters, phone calls, threats they’ll get an opponent, being called an Uncle Tom.

“This is the politics of the 1950s,” he complained. “A lot of members are experiencing a lot of ugly stuff. They’re not going to talk about it, but it’s happening.”

People calling "Uncle Tom"? Democrats? I find that hard to believe.

Posted by: Gabriel Malor at 08:02 PM | Comments (74)
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Belief In Iraq Victory Embraced By 53% of Public, Half of Angelina Jolie's Breasts
— Ace

The odd thing is that 53% also say we should pull troops out. Huh?

And even a trendy celebripundit seems in favor of continuing the Iraq mission on humanitarian grounds.

A Jacksonian meanwhile compares Iraq's political progress to the US Congress', and finds the Democratic controlled Congress wanting.

Posted by: Ace at 06:53 PM | Comments (30)
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Ron Paul Paul Skewered, Ron Paul's Congressional Challenger Championed, By... Wonkette
— Ace

One of the few times I can link to a Wonkette piece in a non-ironic fashion.

Let's get this guy Peden elected. Here he is on Ron Paul's efficacy as a representative:

His voting record is … it’s horrid — 351 pieces of legislation he sponsored, six came out of committee, and none have ever passed. And if you go back and look, he just regurgitates the same pieces of legislation. “Restore the Second Amendment.” What does that mean, exactly?

But that’s his bill, and two years later he submits the bill again. He just keeps reprinting these and throwing them out there. And now he doesn’t even get any cosponsors on many of his bills. [With] many of his amendments, he’s called out of order on the floor for even putting the amendment in, because he doesn’t follow the rules of operation in the House.

He’s up there to make a point, not a difference. He wants to be called out of order because then it’s unique and it’s unusual, and he gets press, or at least Roll Call will say “Here he goes again.” But you know, if you do that once a year or once a term, it works. If you do it three or four times a day, it gets old.

He also says the Paultards hate him and have even made threats. Now they just pester him by calling his campaign office and reading their talking points... over and over and over again.

Posted by: Ace at 01:10 PM | Comments (39)
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Cracked Presents: "Scientology Is Nice"
— Ace

Mild content warning. A lot of the photoshops that accompany the song are about dicks. more...

Posted by: Ace at 01:02 PM | Comments (15)
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