August 30, 2006

Boys Engaged in School: A Rarity? (AnalogKid)
— Ace

You morons won't read this. Well, the female morons will.

As Sommers understood, it is boys’ aggressive and rationalist nature—redefined by educators as a behavioral disorder—that’s getting so many of them in trouble in the feminized schools. Their problem: they don’t want to be girls.

Well Duh.

Going along with Michael's post, this is the nature of primary and secondary schools in America today: feminized, rudderless, geared towards self-esteem and promoting the age of Aquarius. College Diplomas are a commodity because the education has been reduced to least common denominators. What value is there in a degree that guarantees that everyone is, in the aggregate, monolithically below average?

But that's not exactly what this article is about ... It's about the feminization of the schools and how it hurts boys. And somewhere in there is probably a piece of the "Liberalism in America" puzzle. more...

Posted by: Ace at 08:03 PM | Comments (72)
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College Degrees: A Commodity? -- Michael
— Ace

It used to be a big deal to graduate from college. With your degree in hand, you had a ticket to the upper middle class lifestyle.

But these days, so many people are graduating from college that the diploma means less and does not have the same economic clout.

By Michael Mandel
Wed Aug 30, 3:08 AM ET

Young college grads are taking it on the chin. That's what the new data from the government show -- and it's not a pretty sight.

On Tuesday, Aug. 29, the statisticians at the Census Bureau released the latest numbers on income and poverty, for 2005.

. . .

Perhaps the most distressing figure was one buried deep inside the detailed tables. It turns out that the median earnings of young college grads, adjusted for inflation, fell by an astonishing 3.3% in 2005. That's on top of similar declines in 2004 and 2003. All told, the earnings of young college grads are down by almost 8% since 2002. [For a related chart, see BusinessWeek.com, 8/29/06, "Young College Grads in Free Fall."]

By young college grads, we mean full-time workers between the ages of 25 and 34, with a B.A. but no advanced degree. These are people who first entered the workforce during the past 10 to 12 years, some during the boom, some during the early years of the bust. What they've experienced over the past several years is an unrelenting downdraft in wages, probably the first sustained decline for college grads since the 1970s.

Back in the day, you got out of college, worked a few years to get established, and then you bought your starter home and had kids.

Not any more.

What's more, many of them have also been stuck on the wrong side of the housing boom. Just coming out of college, they didn't have the savings or the income to buy a house. And with home prices rising faster than their incomes, it's been very hard for them to catch up.

Pocket of Pain for Young Graduates

Posted by: Ace at 07:03 PM | Comments (41)
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Who Are These Clowns? [Sobek]
— Ace

Since Ace likes to occasionally surprise his readers with a swarm of guest bloggers no one has ever heard of, and me, I thought I'd act the gentleman and provide a bit of an introduction. The fact that I'm basically re-linking a bunch of my old stuff, however, is not to be interpreted as the basest form of traffic-whoring -- after all, if I'm too lazy to actually post anything on my blog anymore, what difference does it make whether I get any traffic or not?

Without further ado:
Dave in Texas
Innocent Bystanders
Blog Idaho
Jack M.
Dave from Garfield Ridge
John from Wuzzadem

And of course, our gracious host, Ace.

Krull2.jpg
"Hello gorgeous!"

Posted by: Ace at 06:16 PM | Comments (17)
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Baby Poop -- Michael
— Ace

Tomkittenpoop.jpg

That right there is a cast of the first solid poop produced by the daughter of Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes. Tom has already made an asshole out of himself by obessing about this kid, buying his own sonogram machine, etc. I'm thinking Tom and Katie have enough PR problems without this.

NEW YORK (AFP) - Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes have yet to show their baby daughter off in public, but eager fans were given an unusual preview with the chance to see a bronze cast depicting her first solid stool.

The scatological sculpture -- more doodoo than Dada -- is purportedly cast from 19-week old Suri's first bowel movement and will be shown at the Capla Kesting gallery in Brooklyn, New York, before being auctioned off for charity.

The artist behind the work, Daniel Edwards, previously courted controversy with a life-size nude sculpture of pop star Britney Spears giving birth on a bearskin rug. That work was shown at the same gallery in April.

"A bronzed cast of baby's first poop can be a meaningful memento for the family," gallery director David Kesting said, adding that he hoped the work would attract bids of up to 25 or 30,000 dollars.

Are they frickin' nuts? They're actually trying to sell this thing?

Oh wait. It's for a good cause.

The sculpture, which sits on a wooden mounting with a glass casing, is to be sold on eBay next month with proceeds from the sale going to infant health charity March Of Dimes.

Aw, that's kinda sweet. It's not some weird ego thing. Tom and Katie are willing to look like total fucktards, selling off a bronze cast of their baby's poop, all for the cause of raising a whole buncha money for the March of Dimes.

As of Wednesday it had attracted a top bid of 41 dollars.

"Tomkitten's" 'first poop' goes on display in New York

Posted by: Ace at 05:27 PM | Comments (61)
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Eric Idle uses YouTube to break Martin Marietta [Dave in Texas]
— Ace

He followed the chain of command.

He tried to work within the system.

They wanted to break him.

So he made them his BITCH. And he broke THEM.

With video.

Which killed the radio star.

Posted by: Ace at 04:28 PM | Comments (15)
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Women: Slaves To Their Hair.
— Dave From Garfield Ridge

SCIENCE:

A whopping 650 days will be dedicated solely to creating a 'salon look' in her own bathroom. The average woman splashes out a monthly average of £10.08 on shampoos and conditioners, £14.03 on home styling products and £301.14 a year on haircuts and colouring.

She spends the equivalent of 41 minutes at home every day washing, styling and restyling. A third of women say their hair is the most important part of their appearance, and they spend more time styling their hair than doing their make-up.

The poll of 2,500 women was conducted by Boots in conjunction with the launch of the UK's first ever home lotion-based straighten kit.

Is anyone at all surprised by this? If so, you've never met a woman in your life.

Obviously, a woman with longer hair is going to have to spend more time on her coif than one with shorter hair. But regardless of length, women spend roughly 87 more hours a day on their hair than men.

Honestly, if I didn't have to shave, my total bathroom time would be on the order of three minutes. One minute to fill the bathtub, one minute to turn on the shower, and another minute pretending I'm in a submarine that got hit.

Speaking Of Submarines: Hey, look at this site-- a page dedicated to speeches in movies, including this one from Crimson Tide.

I can't believe they don't have Patton, though. . . sheesh, talk about an oversight.

Posted by: Dave From Garfield Ridge at 03:10 PM | Comments (36)
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Galloway rock hard over Hezbollah's win (by Allah)
— Ace

It's called priapism, and if left untreated it can kill.

He's got one of the worst cases I've ever seen.

Worse than mine, even.

The Arab world is waking up to its potential power. It has seen the Iraqis confound Anglo-American efforts to recolonise their country, the unbreakability, whatever the cost, of the Palestinian resistance, and now the success of Hizbullah. If there is no settlement there can only be war, war and more war, until one day it is Tel Aviv which is on fire and the Israeli leaders' intransigence brings the whole state down on their heads. Nor is it only Israel that will pay the price for continued conflict: the enduring injustice of Palestinian dispossession has already poisoned western-Muslim relations and helped spill violence and hatred on to our own streets. There is still time to choose peace. But make no mistake, with the victory of Hizbullah, a terrible beauty is born.

Galloway's website advertises him as "the Frank Sinatra of politics," which is stupid for two reasons.

One: there's only one ersatz Sinatra worthy of the name.

And two: he's got chunks of guys like Galloway in his stool.

Posted by: Ace at 02:38 PM | Comments (20)
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Senator Frist is a Contender - AnalogKid
— Ace

I want you all to read that in the tortured melange that is Brando in On The Waterfront.

(Life experience 2786: in a conversation, use the word "melange" like a Northeastern Senator suffering rectal-cranial inversion - Check!)

At any rate, The Boys of Powerline fisked Frist and found him formidable and fabulous fantastic feisty fiery damned good.

But I was impressed by the close-up contact I had today. Frist is deadly serious about the war on terror, the pre-eminent issue of our era. He tells a chilling story of receiving a call from President Bush a week before the recent British airline bomb plot was disrupted. The message at that time, communicated to less than a handful of top federal officials, was that a terrorist plan was known to be in progress which could kill several thousand Americans, but there was no assurance that it could be stopped. It was stopped, thankfully, and news accounts suggest that the very terrorist surveillance programs now under attack by the Democrats were instrumental in saving thousands of American lives. Senator Frist is fully committed to using all of the appropriate tools at our command to win the war against Islamic terror, and September will see a series of legislative initiatives designed to strengthen our defenses against the terrorists.

The next time you consider voting Democrat, consider how they would react on hearing that news. The waltz would be Leak-to-the-press-Leak-to-the-press-Panic. And then blame Bush.

The Majority Leader also made a point on taxes that surprised nearly all of his listeners. If you take a family of four, with an average American income of $64,000 per year, and assume that the Democrats regain control of either the House or the Senate and block the extension of the Bush tax cuts, as they are committed to doing, what would be the impact on that average family? A federal tax increase of 58%. That's what the Democratic Party stands for.

Damn. I'd just be happy to hear Frist throw that in the DNC's face. It's not that it's truth to power or anything silly like that (of course it's true) - it's that Democrats only debate nowadays using lies, obfuscation, and denial. Deny this.

Sadly, there is also this ...

He needs to beef up his Presidential persona, by, for example, learning what to do with his legs when he is addressing a group.

. . .

I'm not sure how to take this.

I could say the same thing about Jessica Simpson (Yes! Do that again!). Or with another meaning altogether, about Hillary (Yes, please put them back under the table ...). But with Frist, it's just a hell of a thing to say. If a guy's body language is so bad that you make note of it, presidential timbre he may not have.

Posted by: Ace at 02:05 PM | Comments (40)
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Former Terror-Sponsoring Iranian President To Visit U.S.
— AndrewR

Via NRO.

This will, presumably, be one of those "good will" visits that involve the sort of speeches in which Khatami simultaneously says that A) We have nothing to fear from Iran, and B) They're going to rain down hellfire on us if we don't watch our step.

But never mind all that; we expect this sort of thing from the State Department. What really burns your ass is that he's being hosted by the National Cathedral. Here's their description of him.

Click the link: It's a New York Times-worthy piece of dishonest, sycophantic flattery.

"Reformist President"? Check.

"Elected with the broad support of women and young adults"? Check.

"Man of Peace"? Check.

By the time they're done, they've all but lifted up his robe and given him a handjob.

Then again, do you really expect seriousness from a church that has a statue of Darth Vader?

Posted by: AndrewR at 01:06 PM | Comments (10)
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CBS alters photo of Katie Couric [Dave in Texas]
— Ace

to make her slimmer.

CBS News President Sean McManus expresses shock and surprise.

The article says "news division president ‘surprised’ at discovery of digital airbrushing"

"Ooooeeee" exclaimed McManus. "I ain't never heard of such a thang. You can make people look different in a pitcher with this fancy 'air-brush' thang".

Posted by: Ace at 11:50 AM | Comments (83)
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It Was Never This Exciting When I Was A Kid
— AndrewR

I'll admit that I can't compete with you dorks when it comes to things like D&D, quoting Stargate, and not talking to girls, but the one area in which I always excelled was puerile, childish humor. I sought it out whenever and wherever I could, and as a result many of my fondest childhood memories involve coming home from school to find a brand new issue of Cracked waiting for me in the mailbox. That's right; I subscribed.

For those of you who don't know: Cracked was the lamer, less respectable (if that's possible) version of Mad magazine, whose mascot was a blatant ripoff of Alfred E. Neuman and whose main attraction was it's large-breasted "reporter" Nanny Dickering. It wasn't funny, it cost too much, and teachers at school would get mad if they caught you reading it, which of course was part of the fun.

At any rate, I eventually grew out of it, sort of, and the magazine went under. Until now, that is.

They're back in business, and they've become so adult-themed and filthy that this piece was shot down by the publisher for being too raw for the print version of the magazine (Warning: link NSFW). If you've ever imagined what would happen if Pooh, Piglet, and Eyeore found their way into Deadwood, then these are the guys you need to talk to.

The new and improved Cracked also features the writing of one Jay Pinkerton, a man whose dedication to photoshopping hilarious dialogue into old comic books (Again: NSFW) is so complete that it's downright heroic.

Posted by: AndrewR at 11:21 AM | Comments (31)
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Scarlett Johansson is Just Like a Woman [Jack M.]
— Ace

Friends,

If you knew me (and you don't) you would quickly learn a couple of things about me.

For starters, I am a huge fan of the music of Bob Dylan.

Secondly, I am a huge fan of Scarlett Johansson's enormously talented knockers.

So you can imagine my joy when yesterday brought not only the release of Dylan's latest album "Modern Times" but also brought the debut video from the album (for the song "When the Deal Goes Down") featuring Scarlett Johansson.

Who, as I mentioned earlier, is very talented.

"Modern Times" is an interesting album, in that it seems to be the flip-side of his previous work "Love and Theft". Where "Love and Theft" was high energy, "Modern Times" is much more contemplative and subdued. "When the Deal Goes Down" is representative of this, I think.

But you don't care about that. You just want to see 5 minutes of Scarlett Johansson looking sexy.

And who am I to cast aspersions on you for that?

So here is the link. Use at your discretion.

Classic Music and Tremendous Beauty as components of the AoS Lifestyle. Whoever would have guessed?

Posted by: Ace at 10:57 AM | Comments (143)
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Where's Ace? [Jack M.]
— Ace

Being a guest blogger comes with all sorts of perks and privileges. No, really, it does.

For instance, one gets to learn many of our illustrious host's secrets. The secrets even he is too embarrassed to admit to publicly on his moron-blog.

Like this one: I know where Ace is going today.

Let's just say a certain someone has a certain script that involves a certain story that merges his love of Star Trek with his passion for The Simpsons.

Think it can't be done? Well, open your minds my friends. For not only has Ace writtent just this script, but he has also composed and performed the proposed theme song!

Courtesy of YouTube I bring you "Star Trek vs. The Simpsons". A mash-up that boldly goes where no mash-up has gone before.

Posted by: Ace at 09:15 AM | Comments (14)
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Hit & Run Killer In San Francisco Claims "I AM A TERRORIST"
— Ace

The news, at least as the MSM is comfortable reporting it.

The driver in a bloody hit-and-run spree that killed one man and injured more than a dozen people was mentally unstable and feeling stress from a recent arranged marriage, according to relatives.

Omeed A. Popal, 29, was taken into custody Tuesday following a rampage that terrorized pedestrians, bicyclists and motorists. Authorities believe it began more than an hour earlier when his black Honda Pilot fatally struck a man in the East Bay area.

"He drove on sidewalks, streets, hit people on crosswalks. It runs the gamut," said police spokesman Sgt. Neville Gittens.

Popal was arrested on suspicion of 14 counts of attempted murder and a charge of willful flight after causing serious injury or death, Gittens said.

A woman who identified herself as Popal's cousin said he had been having recurring nightmares about someone coming to kill him and had been taking medication.

"He thought the devil was coming to him," said Zargona Ramish, who went to the family's home Tuesday afternoon while Popal's relatives were speaking with police. "He is a very good person. He is not like that. What's wrong with him?"

Another cousin, Hamid Nekrawesh, said a recent arranged marriage in Afghanistan, where his family is from, may have contributed to Popal's problems.

"The kid grew up here. He wasn't used to the lifestyle in Afghanistan. I'm sure that put a lot of pressure on him," Nekrawesh said.

Obviously terrorism is a suspected motive -- being nuts does not preclude one from being a terrorist; indeed, it's a nice bullet-point to have on one's resume -- by virtually everyone except those in the MSM. A suspicion is hardly proof, but, as per usual, the MSM refuses to even acknowlege the possibility of an elephant in the room.

Elephant? Nah. Just one of those "juveniles."

They guy may just be crazy. The fact that he sped around the vacinity of a Jewish Community Center may be a coincidence. Still, the absurd speed with which the government and media begin chanting "Move along, move along, nothing to see here folks" is shocking. Did I say shocking? I meant "entirely expected."

I have a tip from a reader that I cannot confirm. (Update: CONFIRMED.) I wouldn't publish it, except... well, if Mayor Gavin Newsom is going to report that it's just a mere case of "road rage" before any investigation, why should I be more responsible than he is?

Again, this is an unconfirmed confirmed tip based on someone's memory of a breaking news story a viewable news report. For your edification, here's Kevin's tip:

his guys first victim was right outside my neighborhood, then he drove 30+ miles into San Francisco [paid the bridge toll, and waited in
traffic] then picked a central area in which to find lots of people out walking around, where he then ran down 13 other people with his car [an evil honda SUV].

On the local TV news last night, an eyewitness told the tv reporter that when the police took him out of the car, he claimed he was a terrorist.... it has
been the only mention of this, and the press is bending over backwards to make this guy out to be mentally ill, I think something fishy might be going
on...

Again, mentally ill does not equal "not a terrorist."

And here's the video... in which the eyewitness says "I am the terrorist" at the end of the clip.

Via JihadWatch. Thanks to readers for pointing it out.

PS: The government, media, and the left use the word "terrorist" in the most restrictive sense possible -- as an international terrorist, working in cooperation with a major terrorist organization.

By such a definition, a single loan nut can never be a "terrorist." And that's a fine definition.

But generally the law recognizes "terrorism" to be any criminal act undertaken with the intent to frighten, intimidate, or, well, "terrorize" a community. If a single loan nut lights a cross in front of a black church-- well, he can be charged with a a terror-related crime.

A single loan nut making death-threats over the phone can be charged with a terroristic threat.

I know the idiot liberals are going to attack the "scaredy-cat" conservatives for employing the second (and technically, legally accurate) definition of terrorist here, while they cling to their (recently-invented, inaccuarate) gloss on the term; such is idiocy.

But rather than getting bogged down in semantics, I just want to know: Did this guy, unbalanced or not, see his action as part of a jihad against the West? A way to lash out at the Great Satan?

I don't know if this guy was just acting out of rage or a particular sort of Islam inspired rage.

If I could trust the MSM to give me the facts about it, it's possible I could just rule the latter out and say, along with Gavin Newsom, "Just another lone nut."

But I can't trust the MSM, so I can't exclude that possibility.

Update: That possibility is now more than a "possibility."

Posted by: Ace at 08:21 AM | Comments (209)
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Guest Blogger Day
— Ace

As you might guess from all the guest posters, I'm in the middle of something pretty time consuming. You probably know what. I'm avoiding saying what for reasons I'll mention at some later time.

I'll be on here and there, but basically today, and part of tomorrow, I'm going to be in Paris working on my novel. Or something.

The Funky Adventure of the Disappearing Blog: I freaked when my blog not only didn't post, but also showed that I had a sum total of zero posts to my credit.

I immediately suspected that I had accidentally sent out my login information to a troll, mistaking Harrison's email (who I meant to email) for some troll who just happened to have a similar email.

I apologize for the J'accuse freak-out I just went through with my guest bloggers.


Oh... Once again, as I'll be away from my gmail most of the time, it's probably better to send tips to morontips@gmail.com, which is an account I set up for the morons.


And Thanks... Despite the fact that the site was blanked, a lot of you guys kept on checking in. Not only is that a really nice gesture, but, as I'm having the best month in this blog's existance (for traffic, alas, not quality), I was really cheesed the outage would hurt my numbers.

For the first time ever, I hit over a million page views in a month, and, who knows, maybe 720,000 "unique" hits.

A million is a damn nice number.


Posted by: Ace at 08:08 AM | Comments (52)
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Clinton: One Good Thing
— LauraW.

Ten years ago, I was living in Hartford, CT's South End area. I was one of only half a dozen people on my street who had a job.

Strong-bodied people for blocks around pretty much spent their days playing video games, hanging out with friends, dealing drugs, and being general ne'er-do-wells while taking advantage of the public dole.

For those of you who didn't live in an urban area during that time, I cannot stress enough how open, obvious, and everywhere welfare fraud used to be. It was in your face.
more...

Posted by: LauraW. at 08:04 AM | Comments (50)
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Secret Hold Pork King: Stevens?
— Ace

...or so, at least, this little noticed (until now) article from Aug. 12 would seem to imply:

One of the senators most criticized for his personal projects, Sen. Ted Stevens, R-Alaska, has a hold of his own on Coburn’s bill to make public the spending patterns of the government. Called the Federal Funding Accountability and Transparency Act, the legislation calls for the creation of a database open to the public where citizens can track government spending.

“He’s the only senator blocking it,” Coburn said of Stevens.

TPMmuckraker notes Coburn isn't returning calls. Because, I guess, this is supposed to be a secret.

Although the toothpaste is now out of the, um, tube -- so why not brush with it?

This is pretty bad news. Not because he's a Republican. But because the whole idea behind this was exposing the secret hold senator in order to embarrass him into lifting it.

And Ted Stevens, dumb as a bag of retards, is incapable of embarrassment.

I expect a Jack Nicholson-like "You're goddamned right I ordered the secret code red hold!" and then a speech about the perogatives of a Senator ("There's this thing called the legislative process... some people want to dump trucks of material into it") and then he'll just stubbornly continue.

Via Hot Air, which also has video of the CNN report on the hunt for the porker, mentioning Porkbusters prominently.

Posted by: Ace at 07:54 AM | Comments (9)
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Edumacation
— Slublog

Okay...testing...testing...

Saw this story in my local-ish paper this morning - "Maine lags behind U.S average in seniors' SAT scores."

Members of Maine's high school class of 2006 did worse on the SAT than the previous year's class, and they dropped further behind their peers around the country on the national college entrance exam, according to results released Tuesday.
The article states that SAT scores have been lower this year, and after some searching found similar results in Charlotte, NC, Tampa, Florida, and Massachusetts.

Much of this drop may have to do with the new test, which has added a writing component for the first time, but doesn't explain why students in Illinois, Seattle and others did better this year. Smarter students or statistical outliers? more...

Posted by: Slublog at 07:45 AM | Comments (39)
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Whoops!
— Pixy Misa

Had a little drive failure thingy going on there.

Should be fixed now. And we'll be moving to new servers next week and leaving the old and poopy servers behind, so that will be good.

Posted by: Pixy Misa at 07:09 AM | Comments (17)
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Caption Contest
— Slublog

googlyeyes.jpg

NEVER LET GO, JOHN! NEVER LET GO!

Yes, this is only one step removed from an ultra-lame open thread - but the picture is just too good to pass up.

Technically, this isn't a 'contest' as there will be no winner and no prizes. In this game, being funny is its own reward.

Have at it!

Posted by: Slublog at 03:21 AM | Comments (79)
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