May 27, 2005

I Have A Bad Feeling About This: Lucas Thinks There Are "More Stories To Tell"?
— Ace

Let's hope this originated with the vigorously-fact-checked reportage of Michael Isikoff:

Great news for 'Star Wars' fans - a seventh blockbusting film is being planned for the series.


A movie insider said: "George believes there are even more stories to tell.
"His latest idea would feature an almost all-new cast, apart from the Jedi master Yoda, who would be the hero of the new movie.".

Making Yoda, the tiny green Jedi master, the hero would be a popular move with 'Star Wars' fans.

The character, voiced by Frank Oz, trained Luke Skywalker to defeat Darth Vader and is a cult hero among devotees.

Umm, no he's not. He was a funny and mysterious and enjoyable little character in Empire. He's okay in small doses. But I think I speak for a lot of "devotees" when I say that I'm sick to death of Yoda.

He's the new Jar-Jar.

I'm about as psyched for further Star Wars prequels as I am for Willow prequels.

Maybe Lucas can do a Baby Willow Heroes film, featuring an infant Madmartigan or something, who twirls swords in between blowing spit-bubbles and pooping his pants.

That might suck less than the latest batch of stinkers.

Thanks to Ogre Gunner.

Posted by: Ace at 09:11 AM | Comments (34)
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Can We Question Newsweek's Patriotism Now?
— Ace

Pixy Misa, host of this domain (also known to me as Mr. Pixy Misa), thoroughly rips an anti-American screen appearing -- where else? -- Al-Newsweek.

But not in the American edition; oh, no. This bit of anti-American incitement is intended only for foreign consumption, appearing it its interenational edition.

Pixy slices like an f'n' hammer:

The truth is that Americans are living in a dream world. Not only do others not share America's self-regard, they no longer aspire to emulate the country's social and economic achievements.

Well, yeah, we noticed that. Anti-Americanism goes hand-in-hand with social and economic dysfunction.

The loss of faith in the American Dream goes beyond this swaggering administration and its war in Iraq.

Fuck you too, Newsweek.

A man after my own heart. And isn't it time to retire the "swaggering" cliche? Aren't paid writers supposed to be on the look-out for cliches that have been used so many times as to have been drained of all meaning whatsoever?

Countries today have dozens of political, economic and social models to choose from.

Most of which have been proven not to work.

Anti-Americanism is especially virulent in Europe and Latin America, where countries have established their own distinctive ways—none made in America.

That is a bizarrely twisted statement.

America didn't invent democracy or free markets, though it did give them some unprecedented guarantees in its Constitution. Since the year that document was signed, France has changed its form of government - not just the ruler or leader, but the very nature of the government itself - twelve times.

The made-in-America product seems to be somewhat more reliable than what many European countries have managed, with the exception perhaps of Britain. I won't even mention Latin America.

Futurologist Jeremy Rifkin, in his recent book "The European Dream," hails an emerging European Union based on generous social welfare, cultural diversity and respect for international law—a model that's caught on quickly across the former nations of Eastern Europe and the Baltics.

Along with high taxes, high unemployment, low economic growth, negative population growth.

In Asia, the rise of autocratic capitalism in China or Singapore is as much a "model" for development as America's scandal-ridden corporate culture.

Yes, who needs civil rights?

The funny thing of course is that this cocksucker goes on to rip Americans for not guaranteeing "civil rights" he holds precious -- guaranteed minimum salary, working or not (i.e., the dole), the "right" to be free of the death penalty, etc.

And yet he also praises the "models" of China and Singapore... far more autocratic and draconian regimes than ours, of course.

How can it be that he thinks countries with (he alleges) more civil "rights" than America are better than America, and that those countries with less civil rights are also better than America?

Well, you don't really need to be consistent when all you want to do is knock America for everyfuckingthing.

I have to join with 72 Repetitions on this -- the right must boycott. If you're still subscribing to Newsweek, you're enabling these bastards.

Posted by: Ace at 08:57 AM | Comments (9)
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Detainee Making Koran-Flush Allegation... Retracts
— Ace

Fake, but also inaccurate.

I'm sure they'll have some reason why fake-but-also-inaccurate stories are important and vital to run, though. Something like "While the story was fake but also inaccurate, it does 'raise important questions' about 'troubling rumors' the administration is 'stonewalling' on."

Posted by: Ace at 08:36 AM | Comments (6)
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Bob Saget: Potty Mouth
— Ace

Anyone who watched comedy in the early eighties knew Bob Saget to be one of the dirtiest comics working in the business. Which made his squeaky-clean turns in Full House and America's Funniest Videos a little odd.

Seriously-- at one point, Bob Saget was quite funny.

A nice article about his days as the Jewish Redd Foxx. With this fun quote from the libertarian-leaning, liberal-pablum-hating (but also annoyingly motormouthed) Penn Jilette of Penn & Teller:

Content warning; go to the jump to read.


Posted by: Ace at 08:10 AM | Comments (9)
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Kelsey Grammer Confirmed for "Beast" in X-Men 3; Topher Grace and Thomas Hayden Church To Play Heavies in Spiderman 3
— Ace

As I've said, Grammer is perfect for the Beast's intellectual side. All the nimbleness and stuff can be faked or trained; I don't think Rebecca Romaijn was a master martial-artist before her turn as Mystique, either.

Church is rumored to be playing one of Spidey's lamer villains, The Sandman. The Sandman was the original villian in James Cameron's "scriptment" (script/treatment) for the original. Why he keeps popping up in these pre-script brainstorming sessions I don't know; okay, he can turn to sand, big f'n' deal.

The only worse Spidey villain is Hydroman (who can turn into... water) or maybe the useless Vulture.

One of Spiderman's cooler foes, The Shocker, never seems to get mentioned by anyone, even though he looks cool and has cool powers.

Topher might be playing anyone, from Venom (no way) to Mysterio to Electro.

I say Electro. And I say let Church play Mysterio. He's got the voice for it. Anyone remember Mysterio's voice from the old good Spiderman cartoon? I think Church could do that.

Thanks to Chickpea.

Posted by: Ace at 08:01 AM | Comments (14)
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Howard Kurtz "Corrects;" Report Does Not Vindicate Newsweek
— Ace

See the update to Instapundit's post on the matter; Howard Kurtz emails to correct the "misimpression" that the report has susbstantiated the Newsweek story.

Thanks to the National Journal's Blogometer.

Update: So, the Newsweek story was unconfirmed. Oddly enough, it turns out that the story about those 15-17 Afghans killed in the riots was unconfirmed, too, although the MSM (and bloggers, too) ran with it.

LGF asks: where are the bodies? And no one seems to be producing them.

Posted by: Ace at 07:47 AM | Comments (5)
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In Case You Missed It: Falacci On Trial For Blasphemy
— Ace

That's not the formal charge, but that is the gist of the complaint.

Despite prosecutors' attempts to get the whole matter dismissed -- even the prosecutors want nothing to do with this! -- the trial of former-leftist, now pro-American, pro-war, anti-Muslim extremism writer Oriana Falacci will go forward. She's accused of "insulting Islam" and inciting hatred of a religion.

There must be a dozen venomously anti-Catholic books published in Europe every year, but I haven't heard about any trials for those.

Europe, despite its pretenses, is not a very free society at all.

Posted by: Ace at 07:43 AM | Comments (7)
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USAF Chatter: Zarqawi Dead
— Ace

As VodkaPundit notes, if Newsweek can traffic in unsubstantiated rumors, why not us?

Posted by: Ace at 07:28 AM | Comments (8)
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May 26, 2005

Revenge of the Star Wars Kid
— Ace

Okay, this is my last Star Wars related post for quite a while. I didn't even like the movie, for crying out loud.

But go here to see a new (-ish?) rejiggering of the Star Wars Kid footage.

Posted by: Ace at 01:09 PM | Comments (20)
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Charges Dropped Against Marine Hero
— Ace

He told two advancing insurgents -- in Arabic -- to halt. They did not. So he shot the sons-a-bitches dead.

He was charged with murder -- apparently based on the tip of a fellow soldier with a grudge against him -- and potentially faced the death penalty.

But finally charges have been dropped against Lt. Ilario Pantano.

Co-host Karol has an interesting nugget to add as well:

New York Magazine featured a story on Pantano recently and []they tried to make him seem like a nut[,] writing that when Pantano saw the towers fall in NY it was 'as if he were a sleeper cell remotely activated' as he rejoined the military...

But they support our troops, of course. Don't they keep telling you so?

And... She also hosted this week's Carnival of the Vanities, going around the blogosphere in 71 links... and made sure to plug our show at the top of the run-down. God bless her mercenary heart.

Only Vaguely Related Update: Lt. Pantano would probably get along fine at this police department.

I have no idea if that photo is doctored or real. But I like it.

Posted by: Ace at 12:49 PM | Comments (13)
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Demographics Is Destiny
— Ace

Son of a bitch. This guy writes something so obvious and yet fairly novel (well, nothing's really new, but this is pretty close to newish) that explains why Republicans are winning now, why they're winning where they're winning, and how they could easily stop winning.

In three words: Affordable Family Formation. Where it's affordable to buy a decent house with a yard and get your kids into a decent public school-- that's Red State country. Where it's expensive to do so, that's Blue State country.

And if the Republicans want to keep their tiny electoral edge, they'll have to work hard to expand the areas in which Affordable Family Formation is possible.

I'm so angry right now I could spit. This is going to be the meme that everyone's talking about in a month, and I had nothing at all to do with it. Shit, this guy's coming up with stuff like this and I'm making Foghat jokes.

Thanks to Kausfiles, who also notes (quite quotably) that the New York Times' newly-announced policy of charging diehard Democrats fifty clams per year to read Paul Krugman is the ultimate in liberal cocooning.

Posted by: Ace at 12:31 PM | Comments (15)
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Archaeology Exhibit Punk'd
— Ace

A self-styled "art terrorist" calling himself Bansky slipped this prehistoric rendering of a hunter-gatherer milling down the aisles at Wal-Mart, looking for the on-sale boxes of brontosaurus burgers, into an exhibit at the British Museum.

The faux artifact remained in the exhibit for "quite some time," he says, until he tipped the Museum off by posting about the prank on his website.

Kind of funny, but if my experience is any guide, no one looks very carefully at this shit in museums anyway. You see one rock or sarcophagus and you've pretty much seen them all.

You could slip in an aged VHS copy of Steven Seagall's Hard to Kill among the flints used to hunt prehistoric aurochs and no one would take notice. (Interestingly, no one took any notice of the actual release of Hard to Kill, either.)

If you want to impress me, slip a Rennaissance-style oil painting of the guys from Foghat on to the wall in the Dutch masters section. Then I'll give you big props.

Thanks to LauraW.

Posted by: Ace at 10:52 AM | Comments (18)
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RebScam: Tennessee State Legislators Arrested For Bribery
— Ace

I love it. Yeah, they nabbed one Republican state rep (that we know about so far), but a bunch of Democratic state senators.

Oh, and by the way, Howard Ford Jr.'s uncle is accused of threatening to kill an undecover federal agent.

I'm sure it doesn't have anything to do with his job performance, though.

Posted by: Ace at 10:43 AM | Comments (4)
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I'm Such a Reality TV Whore It Makes Me Sick
— Ace

And I'm still an 80's music geek, too, so this is up my alley.

Again from Crosblog, which I linked for the ghost-whore story, a new show on NBC where "veteran" (read: washed-up) bands come to perform their signature songs, and a "current" song as well (read: horrible balads by 'N Sync), competing for prizes.

First up: Loverboy vs. Flock of Seagulls. Oh, and Arrested Development (I seem to remember them) and Tiffany.

I know Billy Squier really doesn't want to do this, but come on, man. I've gots to hear Everybody Wants You or In the Dark again, baby.

Oh, and... In case you haven't heard, INXS is lowering themselves to auditioning a new lead singer for their band on a show called Rock Star.

Yeah. I'll watch it. Damn straight I'll watch it.

Co-hosted by another reality TV favorite, Dave Navarro of Jane's Addiction, Red Hot Chili Peppers, that show with Carmen Electra, and of course Celebrity Poker Showdown.

Posted by: Ace at 09:45 AM | Comments (56)
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Disobedience Saved 2,500 in WTC Mass-Murder
— Ace

They were told to stay put; many didn't. They were told to avoid the elevators; many ignored this advice and got to street level as quickly as possible.

Good on them.

I know -- through a friend -- someone who did the same thing. This guy was rather old, and he had been through the 1993 garage-bombing of the building. And he knew how long it would take to walk down upwards of 100 floors of stairs. Especially for an old man, but I can't imagine too many twenty-somethings would be sanguine about that sort of downward trek, either.

So, after the first airplane struck the first tower, when his bosses said "Sit tight, we'll be okay," he said, "Screw you guys, I'm going home."

And headed for the stairwells. And got the hell out of Dodge.

And it probably saved his life, of course.

Thanks to NickS.

Posted by: Ace at 09:37 AM | Comments (33)
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In Europe, Votes Only Count If Citizens Vote The Right Way
— Ace

No wonder the Democrats are so enamored of their European kinsmen.

Plan B from Outer Brussels. If Europeans reject the new constitution (which, frankly, I could care less about, except that the cocksucker European bureaucratic elites really seem to want it), they'll just have a re-vote. Or so some say.

On the other hand, al-Reuters says the French PM has rejected such a notion.

Let's hope that whatever happens, a great many Europeans are dismayed and even filled with "heart-ache" and write a lot of navel-gazing columns and letters to the editors and maybe get off of America's tits for like five minutes.

Thanks to The Shadow.

Posted by: Ace at 09:31 AM | Comments (6)
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Weird Story of the Day
— Ace

You tell me what's the weridest part:

1) There's a brothel preserved as a museum in (wait for it) Butte, Montana.

Heh-heh. Heh heh heh. Heh heh heh. Butte.

2) Just as the New York Times was about to do a story on it, they open the doors for the reporter and find the cathouse museum to be the victim of illegal entry. It is suspected the thieves entered "through the back door."

Heh-heh. Heh heh heh. Butte. Back door. Heh heh heh.

3) The thieves made away with "antique sex toys." Not really sure what that means, pre-latex, before the great leap forward in sex-toy technology. I'm figuring it's stuff like wooden hammers with which to smash yourself in the genitals. Meat tenderizers, so to speeak.

Heh heh. Meat.

Hey-- people were made of tougher stuff back then.

4) But the thieves cheesed it before making it to the upper levels, where more valuable prehistoric sex toys were kept. Why?

"I think they got scared out as they were in the process," Giecek said.

More specifically, he's pointing to supernatural interference.

"I do think a ghost scared them off," he said.

In 1992, thieves who broke into the brothel and were caught said they were scared off the second floor by a ghost. Maybe the same thing happened here, he said.

Look, when you're in a whorehouse, the clanking of chains and rhythmic moaning does not necessarily indicate an ectoplasmic intruder.

Ectoplasm. Heh heh. Ghost choad. Heh heh heh. A heh heh heh heh huh huh heh.

Posted by: Ace at 09:21 AM | Comments (15)
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Hot Tip: Sell the MSM Short
— Ace

NYT's stock price keeps falling, along with its credibility and prestige.

PS: If you take any advice from me on financial matters and actually attempt to sell any media company short, you really are a moron, and you deserve anything you get.

Posted by: Ace at 09:12 AM | Comments (2)
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Fake But Accurate, Redux: Newsweek Claims Vindication
— Ace

Well, it is the season for re-runs, right?

So let me get this straight. Newsweek runs a piece citing a "source" (in the original-- called "sourceS") suggesting that a new report would substantiate the flush-Koran stories.

The report comes out. It mentions the allegations -- not much of a shock, as jihadis have been making these claims since 2002 -- but does not mention any substantiation. It just lists the claims.

Newsweek's Howard Feinman claims, "See? We wuz right!"

Oh, really?

Once again, I have to go on record as saying I'm actually nearly 100% certain that the Koran has been treated in a disrespectful manner dozens of times to push the psychological buttons of these religious crazies.

But I'm kind of certain of a lot of things I can't prove. That doesn't mean I can report them as fact. I know that, and I'm just a goddamned amateur moronblogger. I'm not a hotshot reporter for a major (though irreparably tarnished) newsweekly featuring multiple layers of painstaking editorial fact-checking.

Hypothetical for the liberal reporters who think this story is so goddamned important it has to be reported, substantiated or not:

Imagine a Christian religious fundamentalist terrorist. Say an abortion-clinic bomber.

During interrogation -- trying to get the guy to squeal on his compatriots -- an FBI officer tears up the Bible. And then spits on the man's own crucifix.

Does anyone imagine that the New York Times, Newsweek, CNN, etc., would be troubled by such "outrageous" tactics? (For the record: I wouldn't be.) Do you think they'd bother reporting them, even if substantiated?

And if they did report them, don't you think they'd be careful to "contextualize" the interrogation by noting 1) it is not physically coercive, but merely psychologically so and 2) done to achieve a greater moral good?

It's been said too many times to even have an impact anymore, but apparently all religions are to be tolerated except 1) Christianity and 2) conservative Judaism.

Posted by: Ace at 08:37 AM | Comments (2)
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Schroeder Engineers Dubious Snap-Elections in the Fatherland
— Ace

Several days old, but I never got around to posting it.

Long story short: facing an embarassing defeat in Westphalia and general discontent about Germany's ailing economy, Schroeder engineered quickie early elections by deliberately getting a vote of no confidence from the Parliament (the requirement for early elections). He had his own people vote "no confidence" in order to allow him to call for early elections.

Which raises the question: why didn't the opposition vote "confidence" to forestall this? I guess they were taken by surprise, or else really want a chance to take Schroeder down when he's wounded.

But obviously Schroeder figures this is his best chance to cling to power.

Of course I don't follow German politics very closely, but I have formed an impression or two, and one of those impressions is that Gerhard Schroeder is a fucking douche-tool.

I hope the conservatives in Germany can get it together, double-quick, and oust this dickhead. But European conservatives often seem even less competent than the American Republican Party.

Posted by: Ace at 07:54 AM | Comments (14)
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