January 31, 2005

A Song for Ace in the Event that He Has Died
— Ace

....................

Cuckling doves,
Chittering swallows,
An old man in the park
With some ducks

Who's getting the porn collection?

....................

UPDATE: An already funny haiku contest has sprung up in comments.

UPDATE: So far I nominate the following:

When the cat's away
the mice lose integrity
Call Vinnie Falcone

by LauraW

And:

Where's Ace? Hell, where's Joe?
Nobody knows who Joe is,
But Ace has conscious.

For getting a precious few more drops out of the Anka-fruit.

Though, the first entry...

Ace of Spades H.Q.
was crushed on the Sundance couch
while "casting" M. Cho

by S. Philabuster set the bar pretty high to begin with, I thought.


the UNPOPULIST

Posted by: Ace at 07:37 AM | Comments (29)
Post contains 132 words, total size 1 kb.

1 We should have an Ace haiku contest!

Posted by: rdbrewer at January 31, 2005 07:41 AM (m6OTa)

2 Ooh! Fantastic idea!

Where the hell is that guy anyway...

Posted by: fat kid at January 31, 2005 07:49 AM (yHxMk)

3 Okay, I'm not so sure it's even appropriate to joke.

Who the hell leaves their blog unattended for so long?

Posted by: Dave at Garfield Ridge at January 31, 2005 07:54 AM (mrpxK)

4 Ace of Spades H.Q.
was crushed on the Sundance couch
while "casting" M. Cho

Posted by: senator philabuster at January 31, 2005 07:55 AM (UHfuz)

5 "Death in Sundance"

The dealer slices

The death card falls, lies face up

Bottom of the deck

Posted by: Nicholas Kronos at January 31, 2005 07:57 AM (iwMRZ)

6 I can't remember high school english class to write a haiku with proper structure. So I'll resort to the next bes thing.

There once was a man with some cards
Who left his blog with some bards
They post every minute
Making us fidget
Wondering if we need to find a new yard


Posted by: Aaron Brazell at January 31, 2005 08:09 AM (p1Q0q)

7 integrity kick
slice like a fucking hammer
Ace please come home now

Posted by: Dave at January 31, 2005 08:11 AM (c2h2p)

8 Lightning bolt missiles
Margaret Cho's melon-fat head
Springtime in Sundance

Posted by: Eric (yeah that one) at January 31, 2005 08:12 AM (MJbn9)

9 There once was a man named Ace...

Wait, that's not haiku.

Posted by: John from WuzzaDem at January 31, 2005 08:21 AM (Pt3Le)

10 There once was a man named Ace
Al Franken sat on his face
"Msdgfwb" he said
As he fell over dead
Semen was all over the place

Posted by: Dave at January 31, 2005 08:27 AM (c2h2p)

11 First there was Johnny
Then Paul with integrity
We now ask, Where's Ace?!?

Posted by: fat kid at January 31, 2005 08:28 AM (yHxMk)

12 I can't get enough sweet haiku action...

The Margaret Cho
The Jeanine Geraffalo
The Ace killed himself

Liberal party
Hollywood Ace in the hole
Al Franken buttfucked

Posted by: Dave at January 31, 2005 08:33 AM (c2h2p)

13 Missing Blogger
concerned Poetic waxings
Who really gives a toss?

Posted by: Adamant at January 31, 2005 08:37 AM (cjljS)

14 Awww dip. Skinbad wins my vote.

Posted by: fat kid at January 31, 2005 08:39 AM (yHxMk)

15 "Where is Ace?"

Eye on the instruments -
but was one on the runway?
Did his plane go down?

Posted by: Rocketeer67 at January 31, 2005 08:40 AM (9JspL)

16 Ace, get back here now
Don't make us get Al Franken
To ride your ass boy

Posted by: Dave at January 31, 2005 08:46 AM (c2h2p)

17 Hillary Clinton
Collapses at speech, God says
Tired of her loose shit

Posted by: Dave at January 31, 2005 08:50 AM (c2h2p)

18 "I find your lack of
faith...disturbing," Ace intoned,
and took back his blog.

When the cat's away
the mice lose integrity
Call Vinnie Falcone

Posted by: lauraw at January 31, 2005 08:50 AM (C/v+x)

19 Not in a gay way
Ace rode Redford and Franken
Love like a viking

Posted by: Midaz at January 31, 2005 08:51 AM (EPAmJ)

20 Ace sleeps with the anchovies.

Posted by: Johnny Coldcuts at January 31, 2005 08:59 AM (iwMRZ)

21 Ace,

Here:

Like a Viking
Ace nails Miriam-Blossom
I question the timing

Posted by: MeTooThen at January 31, 2005 09:30 AM (2pf2y)

22 Where's Ace? Hell, where's Joe?
Nobody knows who Joe is,
But Ace has conscious.

Posted by: Gnostic Surface at January 31, 2005 09:34 AM (HaPIL)

23 Guest bloggers go home
WAS THAT S'POSED TO BE FUNNY?!?
...and so Ace returns

Posted by: fat kid at January 31, 2005 09:37 AM (yHxMk)

24 Hah! Love them!

Posted by: ace at January 31, 2005 10:49 AM (5qmzg)

25 Just looking at skinbads again, and realizing it should read more like:
Redford's Perrier:
Tepid. "Where's the new butt
boy we hired? Loose shit."Now it's technically correct... Heheheh

Posted by: fat kid at January 31, 2005 03:16 PM (yHxMk)

26 Your Poetry is not so understanding but I enjoyed reading it.

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